Harry Anderson Has Died 

April 16, 2018 / Posted by:

All together now: I object to this shitty, shitty news.

Harry Anderson, who played the boy-faced judge and amateur magician Harry Stone on Night Court, has died. WSPA -TV reports that Harry was found dead at his home in Asheville, North Carolina this morning. As of now, we don’t know exactly how Harry died. His son Dashiell told TMZ that he died of natural causes. Police say that foul play wasn’t involved. He was 65.

Harry Anderson’s first love was always magic. He got into magic as a kid. At 17 years old, he moved to San Francisco where he performed magic on the streets for coins. He then ended up at the Magic Castle in L.A. where he met his agent. Harry’s agent got him a few guest spots on Saturday Night Live, which led to him getting cast as Harry “The Hat” Gittes on several seasons of Cheers. While he was on Cheers, he landed the role that pretty much everyone knows him for: Judge Harry Stone on Night Court.

Harry put a lot of himself into Judge Harry. Like Harry, Judge Harry was into magic and was a stage 10 Mel Tormé fanboy. Mel Tormé was on Night Court a few times. Harry played Judge Harry Stone for all 9 seasons of Night Court from 1984 to 1992. He was nominated for three Emmys. Post-Night Court, he guest starred on many TV shows (including playing himself on 30 Rock) and was in the original It.

In 1993, he starred as Dave in the sitcom Dave’s World with three legends: Shadoe Stevens! Meshach Taylor! And Bea Arthur! Dave’s World ran for four seasons.

Just the other week I was thinking that a revival I wouldn’t mind that much is Night Court, because it’s time for the triumphant return of Harry Anderson, Markie Post, Richard Moll, and Marsha Warfield. And now Harry Anderson is gone.

Rest in peace, Harry, you are now in heaven grossing the angels out with your vanishing finger trick.

Pic: NBC/Getty

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Mariah Carey Has Been Hit With Another Sexual Harassment Lawsuit Threat, And This One’s From Her Ex-Manager

April 16, 2018 / Posted by:

Late last year, one Mariah Carey’s ex-bodyguards Michael Anello threatened to sue the unicorn one for almost $750,000 for not paying invoices and sexually harassing him by bouncing around him in see-through lingerie that exposed her Hello Titty nipples to him. That lawsuit hasn’t been filed yet, but Mimi’s lawyers got a new legal threat to deal with. Stella Bulochnikov used to be Mimi’s manager, and when she wasn’t allegedly causing everyone to hate her, she was orchestrating great career moves for Mimi, like that scripted turd of a reality show. Stella and Mimi broke up last year. At the time, the story went that Stella quit Mimi, because she couldn’t deal with Mimi acting an erratic mess (which was probably from her bipolar II disorder). But it turns out that Mimi quit Stella, and now Stella is threatening to sue for breach of contract and sexual harassment. Just like Michael Anello, Stella claims that the Elusive Chanteuse is elusive when it comes to covering up her parts around her employees.

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Khloe Kardashian Has Named Her Baby The Opposite Of What Tristan Thompson Has Been To Her

April 16, 2018 / Posted by:

It looks like the only true thing that Khloe Kartrashian will ever get out of Tristan Thompson is a living Instagram pic accessory (that’s Kartrashian for “child“.)

Because Khlozilla is so “hood,” I fully expected her to name her 4-day-old daughter Kompton Kardashian. But instead of doing that, she brought on endless jokes by naming her poor baby True Thompson. I guess ISwearTristanThompsonIsntCheatingTrash Thompson didn’t fit on the birth certificate. The baby’s name might be True, but baby’s daddy is far fucking from it. The kid’s nickname should be “Wishful Thinking,” because True is something that Tristan will never be to Khlozilla.

Tru Davies better call a lawyer.

Not only is Khloe’s baby the only True thing between her and her wandering dick-having cheating slut of a man, but that baby is also the only True thing in the Kartrashian family.

When all the shit came out about Tristan Thompson’s dick paying a visit to every cooch that wasn’t attached to his latest pregnant girlfriend, I thought it was all part of Pimp Mama Kris’ diabolical plan to oust him from the family so that her newest little cooing ATM would get the last name Kardashian. But I was wrong. Besides, Khloe couldn’t name her daughter True if she gave True the last name Kardashian. It would be impossible. I mean, every time you type the words “True” and “Kardashian” next to each other, it automatically auto-corrects to False Kardashian since there’s nothing true about the koven.

UPDATE: Pimp Mama Kris claims that “True” is a family name, but since it came from the mouth of PMK, I’m going to say that this fun fact is a false fact!

Pic: Instagram

Open Post: Hosted By Britney Spears Saying That The Secret To Happiness Is Selective Amnesia

April 16, 2018 / Posted by:

Do your past mistakes and embarrassing behavior keep you up at night? Do scenarios where you’ve acted inappropriately or said something stupid run on continual loop of shame whenever you close your eyes? If so, Britney Spears has got a solution. According to Britney, “the secret to happiness: No memory”.

Ricky Martin presented Britney with a Vanguard award at the GLAAD Awards, so Access Hollywood reporter, Scott Evans (not that one) whipped out a 1999 picture of Ricky and Britney together and asked her what she remembered about the day the photo was taken. Britney’s answer: Not a Goddamn Thing.

I was hoping the ghost of Patrick Swayze would storm in and announce “nobody puts Britney in a corner” because she looks like she needed saving. Britney was joking, but her face is telling a harrowing tale throughout this interaction. She looks like she would chew her own leg off if it meant Scott would stop asking her to remember things. What he should have done was lay a trail of Cheetos to lure Britney into a safe space then calmly tell her where she was and what year it is. If he had done that, she probably wouldn’t have had to dismiss him like he was a rabid Jehovah’s Witness.

Pic: YouTube

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