Hot Mess Convention

/ March 13, 2007

Last night’s Rock and Rock Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony in NYC looked like either a hot mess convention or an AA reunion. I mean, WTF?! What happened to Patti Smith?! She looks like the bad end of gutter-found Jack Daniels bottle. We all know Keith Richards is haggard. I think his skin is made out of wax.

Ronnie Spector made Aretha Franklin look like a damn beauty queen! Ronnie is like a Jackee Harry on crack!!

Slash doesn’t look bad in the face, but look at that gut! Wear a girdle! I’d still Sammy Hagar from the back.

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Angie to Have Her New Baby Within Weeks

/ March 13, 2007

Angelina Jolie could have her new three and a half year-old, Vietnamese son within weeks. An official confirmed that her application has been processed quickly and expected to be finished by March 31st. Once she is given approval, she may pick up her son at anytime.

The boy Angie will adopt was left a local hospital when he was an infant. He was taken to the Tam Binh orphanage on the outskirts of Ho Chi Minh City where they tried to find his parents to no avail.

Officials say that she has not received special treatment and her application is being processed quickly, because the boy is older and his files were pretty much complete.

Angie applied by herself, because laws in Vietnam make it impossible for unmarried couples to adopt.

I wonder if they have like a welcome packaged already put together for each kid. You know, sunglasses to protect them for the blinding cameras, a language dictionary so the kids and communicate with each other and a pair of Jimmy Choos from Maddox.

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Gay Idol Jack-Off Scandal!!!

/ March 12, 2007

Mario Vasquez was the frontrunner going into American Idol 2005. He dropped out right after he made the final 12. He said he dropped out for “family reasons” but later said he wanted to pursue his music career on his terms, because Idol has such a strict contract.

Well, now it looks like he may have dropped out for other reasons.

Magdaleno Olmos was an accountant for the production company of the show and he filed a lawsuit today in Los Angeles claiming Mario jacked off in front of him while Idol was in production. HOT!

Magdaleno alleges that “Vazquez stared lasciviously, smiled lasciviously and on one occasion followed him into a bathroom … knocked on the door of the plaintiff’s stall and made eye contact through the space in the stall door.”

He goes on to say that Mario “started to rub his genitals over his pants. Attempting to leave the bathroom, Olmos opened the door of the stall and saw Vazquez standing in front of him with his pants down masturbating. Vasquez pushed further into the stall and continued masturbating with one hand and trying to pull down Olmos’ pants with another hand. Olmos claims he tried to cover his body with his hands but Vazquez touched his chest and stomach underneath his shirt, and Olmos’ “genitals” as Vazquez “attempted to unzip” Olmos’ pants.

Mario asked the dude “if he wanted oral sex.”

Magdaleno then managed to get out of the stall, but not before Mario grabbed his arm. Mag complained to his supervisor, but he was told that he was “crazy” and was threatened to be fired. A few months later he was fired.

Graphic. I need a ciggie and a cum rag now.

Magdaeleno is suing Mario, FOX and Freemantle. Mario denied gay rumors shortly after he left Idol.

Just look into his eyes, you know Mario loves his prostate massaged. His ass feels the tingle, you can tell.

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