Xtina was on Ellen today and I really didn’t pay attention to anything she said. I just kept watching her massive chichis go up and down. They are much more interesting, because bitch is dull. Watching her interview with Ellen reminds me of running into someone you haven’t seen in a long time and there’s a reason why you haven’t. They just blab on and on about their boring ass life and you’re standing there thinking “When is this person going to shut the mouth?”

I did manage to catch the part about Xtina breastfeeding Max. Like she’s really going to breastfeed. If she was afraid of labor, I’m sure she’s not going to like getting her nipple bitten off by baby. She probably sprays it into his mouth from across the room while she looks at her People Magazine spread over and over again.

Hell yes I’d hit it! I only say this, because I have a Dorothy Zbornak fantasy and Dorothy would definitely rock the shit out of this ensemble. She would even wear those nurse shoes with the little hearts on them that you can change the color. I know she’s not a nurse, but I would always see her in that shit. Comfort first. You know Dorothy was a total dom in bed. She was probably into whipping and sick shit like enema play. I don’t play that, but I’d let Dorothy slap the shit out of me.

I’m pretty sure Will Ferrell wasn’t going for the Dorothy Zbornak look. I think he’s channeling Shaq. Here he is at the Semi-Pro premiere yesterday.

You can find Jesse McCartney on JDate. He’s waiting for you – Just Jared

Lindsay Lohan gets RAW – Hollywood Tuna

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden hate their kid – IDLYITW

Tara Reid looks clean. It must have been her bath week (site NSFW) – Drunken Stepfather

David Beckham says aloha – Popsugar

ScarJo and Natalie Portman meet the Prince – Egotastic!

Jelly Bean George Clooney! – Hollywood Rag

Celebrity mansions – Cityrag

Angie & Maddox’s movie date – A Socialite’s Life