Jake Gyllenhaal was spotted in the underwear department of a Bloomingdale’s recently sifting through all of the tightey whities. He was going through every single brand, taking them out and examining them.
A source said, “He looked very confused and had a furrowed brow . . . He was examining undies like an anthropologist in the city’s most highly trafficked department store.”
Damn! Can’t a homo practice his fetish in peace without everyone tattling on him? Damn.
The Beverly Hills police department is investigating faux rocker, Joel Madden, after a female photographer claims he attacked her ass on Sunday night. The photographer was outside of Mr. Chow’s taking snaps of Joel and his main toothpick, Nicole Richie, when she claims he hit her breast “with the heel of his hand.” She claims she had to see a doctor and has a welt to prove it.
Joel was also seen throwing a forceful, open-handed stiff-arm into the chest of another papper.
Welt in the breast?! I’m sure it was an accident or he was trying to get touch a real breast, because he’s only had chest bones for the past few months since he’s been with Nicole.
I didn’t know it was like that with Tinky Winky?! Let’s hope La La doesn’t have any doody bubbles up there.
Photographer Terry Richardson (the oldie that should NOT be in his tightey whities) shot Jared Leto both fat and skinny for Purple Magazine. Jared put on the chunk for that movie he did with Lindsay Lohan about murdering John Lennon.
I’m confused. Those look like the “before” and “after” shots from those infomercials for diet pills. The sick thing is, I’d even take the fat Jared. He can rest his gut on the small of my back anytime…anytime…any year.
Katie Holmes was snapped in Los Angeles the other day with some dress sketch. I’m guessing that’s Tommy Girl’s newest hush-hush bedroom gown. Please, you know he loves it in silky pink.
EWWW! That snot-nosed piece of trash! I just want to take that ciggie and those white sunglasses and MacGyver it into a stun gun and zap her with it. Kiki Dunst needs to be stopped. Let’s be real, she’s not reading that book. She probably has pictures of herself in there and looks at it all day saying “Oh Kiki, you so pretty.” Guess what bitch! You aren’t!
Do they even make sunblock that strong?