Today is 7/11 which means it’s Free Slurpee Day or as some of us like to call it “National Spears Day!” Actually, they don’t drink Slurpees. They order the Slurpee syrup and snort that shit straight-up. They cut it with Pixy Stix.

Unfortunately, cheap ass 7-11 is only offering 1 Slurpee per location. If you have the luxury of living near several 7-11s, then you better drive around and collect several Slurpees. When you get home, pour all your Slurpees (you can mix flavors) in a pitcher with a bottle of Everclear. Then you can party all weekend long.

Thanks Shari

I’ve posted HoHan’s new line of hooker leggings before, but I never knew what this bitch was charging.

I’d rather have scraped-up knees than spend 132 clams on those dick-sucking leggings. Besides, any experienced peen-sucka knows how to squat low and suck. That way you don’t mess up your pretty little knees.

HoHan must have been high on some bad shit when she priced this skankness. Do these leggings come equipped with a crotch cooling system? Or maybe you get a baggie of Colombian sugar with every purchase? I mean, the cheapest thing in her line is a pair of $42 tacky ass leopard cankle-hiders. No.

Michael Ian Black managed to barely beat Kate Gosselin in the cage fight to determine June’s Hot Slut of the Month. Michael beat her mom ass by less than 25 votes. Thanks to all the dumb skanks out there who voted!

Below is MIB’s gay sexy times scene with Bradley Cooper in “Wet Hot American Summer.” There’s seriously nothing better.

UPDATE: Click here to read Michael Ian Black’s response to winning the illustrious title of “Hot Slut of the Month.”

Carrie Underwears in a bikini – Egotastic!

And so it begins… Hot No Longer Pregnant Dude is getting his own movie – Towleroad

Jessica Simpson sucks at faking an orgasm – Hollywood Tuna

Michael Buble is single – Lainey Gossip

All American CoCo – Hollywood Rag

Where are Selma Blair’s nipples? – IDLYITW

Adrian Grenier gets leid – Popsugar

John Travolta as Forrest Gump? No. – Cityrag

Miley Cyrus’ smiley face looks more like wet farting face – Just Jared

Jo Champs is a mess. Whoever the hell she is (NSFW) – Drunken Stepfather

Only a Hogan tramp would wear a swimsuit from Wal-mart with Sigourney Weaver’s pants from “Working Girl.” When are these twats going to realize that in this day and age only babies are allowed to wear high-waisted crap. If you can wipe your own ass without help from daddy then you have no business wearing this mess. Oh wait. Okay, Brooke has permission.

Here’s more of Brooke looking like her mommy (and that’s not a compliment) in NYC yesterday.

I’ve talked a lot about Rooster McConaughey and his son, Miller Lyte, but I’ve never seen a picture of the poor kid. Well, here he is. What in Carrot Bottom hell did they do to Miller Lyte’s hair? They totally used leftover Easter egg dye and mashed up carrots to make his hair look like that. They were paying homage to their hero, Ronald McDonald.

Miller Lyte may look like a happy child now, but wait until he grows up and becomes a Bud Light kind of boy. He’s going to take the family shotgun off the wall and chase his Rooster all around the trailer park.

This is what pisses me off about Matthew. His brother’s nickname is Rooster and his nephew’s birth name is Miller Lyte, but he names his son Levi? The McConaughey family should disown his ass for that.

Source

Thanks Megan