Morning Wood

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Another stupid Top Model shoot, but Brittany is SO HOT – Drunken Stepfather

Halle Berry was homeless – DIC

Nicole Richie might be addicted to pills – Celebitchy

How many times a day does Mischa Barton’s dog need a walk? – The Bastardly

Heather Mills is pissing off the UK police – SOW

Wedding bells for Uma Thurman? – INO

Britney’s new dude speaks out, but doesn’t say much – ICYDK

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$45,000 for This?

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Blogs from left to right are calling this bag the ugliest ever. The Louis Vuitton Tribute Patchwork Bag is also one of the most expensive at $45,000. It’s apparently already sold out. LV only made a couple of dozen of the fugly thing and they’ve already been paid for and delivered. Let me guess…an Olsen, a Hilton and a Lohan?

When the bag hit Paris runways last fall, critics called it “Frankenstein’s monster.”

Fake ones are already springing up! All you have to do is go to Chinatown and buy several fake ones and put them together, but why? It would still be hideous. No self-respecting bag lady would even carry this crap.

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I Heart Sanjaya

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Not surprisingly, Sanjaya was NOT voted out of “American Idol” last night. It was surprising that he made the bottom 3. I really thought this dude was at the top of the list. Brandon Rogers was voted out. It’s not right, but it’s okay.

I’ve changed my mind about Sanjaya. I want him to stay. His days are numbered, but he’s really hot. He represents the little homo in all of us. We must keep him just for the hair alone. He is the voice of an angel, a beautiful homo angel.

If he leaves, who else do we have to make fun of? Everyone is else is a damn bore. Sanjaya keeps us talking. Vote for this bitch.

Also, if you need a gorgeous and hypnotic morning serenade..here’s Sanjaya doing “Aint No Mountain High Enough!”

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I Don’t Think Aretha Franklin Wants Jennifer Hudson to Play Her

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Aretha Franklin has confirmed that she’s in talks with several studios about a biopic of her life story. Aretha also said that Jennifer Hudson was in talks to play her and I don’t think she’s really loving it. Access Hollywood asked Aretha about the Oscar-winner playing her and she sort of didn’t answer the question.

Aretha said, “The producers want to know how I feel about it, about her playing me. What I’d like to see is three different people playing me. Perhaps someone playing me from the age of 25 to about 40 and then someone else beyond that.”

They are going to need 3 people to play just one of her, because homegirl is large!

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We Already Know He Looks Dead…

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Everyone in the Universe has already said that Marc Anthony looks dead, so I will say..he looks half-dead. He is cracking a smile, right? Marc and JLo attended ShoWest in Las Vegas last night to sell their movie “El Cantante.” The film is about….who cares it’s not like you’re going to see it until it’s on late-night local TV.

Is JLo wearing those mink eyelashes again?

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She’s More of a Coke Girl

March 15, 2007 / Posted by:

Former Pepsi spokeswhore, Britney Spears, is addicted to coke. Coca-Cola to be exact. Star Magazine reports that she drinks up to 24-cans of the sugary drink every single day. That’s a coke every hour.

Perhaps all this sugar is giving Brit a grumpy attitude. Sources say that she’s been a real pain in rehab.

“She’s been very demanding; acts like a 12-year-old and throws temper tantrums when she doesn’t get what she wants! She refuses to pick up after herself and even asked if she could hire a maid! She’s asking for this and that, special food, special everything … and she’s not that nice to anyone.”

24 cans a day?! BLECH! I bet you if she stopped that crap, she’d lose tons of weight. Disgusting.

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