A Jennifer Lopez Biopic

November 19, 2006 / Posted by:

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I’m sure Jennifer Lopez isn’t too happy about a biopic of her life that’s about to be released. The spoof film is called JHo: Jenny on the Cock and yup it’s porn. Ha. Pornstar, Jasmine Byrne, plays the title role and has waited her entire career for a role like this.

She said, “I always loved Jennifer Lopez, you know J-Lo doing her singing and acting and this movie is such a fun adventure that I jumped at the chance to do it.”

Ooooh, JHo’s not going to be happy! Do you think they are screening a copy at the TomKat wedding? Probs. This is probably the most accurate portrayal of Jennifer Lopez’s career. She should be proud.

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Huge and Surprising News!

November 19, 2006 / Posted by:

Pete Doherty has been arrested. Unfortunately, he wasn’t arrested for anything new. He was arrested Saturday when police saw him driving like a crazy person with another man and another woman. When police searched the car they found crack cocaine and arrested Petey and his two friends. The woman was not Kate Moss. He has been released on bail and ordered to return in December.

Petey was reported to be off drugs and clean, but we knew that was a load of bullshit. I do think that a good thing can come out of this for Pete. He’s bound to be in the Guinness World Records for being the biggest crackhead or being arrested the most times without serving actual jail time.

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Thanks Shores4Now

Birthday Sluts

November 19, 2006 / Posted by:

Calvin Klein (64)
Kerri Strug (29)
Savion Glover (33)
Jason Scott Lee (40)
Rocci DiSpirito (40)
Jodie Foster (44)
Meg Ryan (45)
Allison Janney (46)
Ann Curry (50)
Kathleen Quinlan (52)
Ted Turner (68)
Larry King (73)

And a special Birthday shout out to Mark in SD!

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Tom & Katie Make Their Fake Relationship Official

November 18, 2006 / Posted by:

The moment we’ve been waiting for (not really) has arrived and Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are officially husband and wife. Katie wore an off the shoulder Armani gown and Tom wore a blue suit. Boring and yawn.

People Magazine reports:

The sunset ceremony was performed by a Scientology minister, according to a statement from their reps. The wedding party included Cruise’s children, Isabella and Connor, the best man was Cruise’s best friend, David Miscavige – the head of the Church of Scientology – and Katie’s sister Nancy Blaylock served as the matron of honor. Though initially there were questions about whether Cruise and Holmes’s marriage on Saturday was official – the Mayor of Bracciano, Italy, said the couple needed to have a civil ceremony in town in order to make it legal – Cruise’s reps say Tom and Katie took care of everything beforehand. “As is customary for couples marrying outside of the United States, Cruise and Holmes officialized their marriage in Los Angeles prior to their departure for Italy,” according to the statement.

Posh Beckham used this moment as her own fashion catwalk. Bitch looks way hot and I’m sure she was going for that alien look. David couldn’t attend the wedding, because he was due back for training. I think he got in trouble. Anyway, I’m sure there will be a hell more pictures and I can’t wait (sarcastic yawn.)

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