It was already known that Russell Crowe’s voluptuous ass would play the Sheriff in Ridley Scott’s “Nottingham,” but now he’s also playing Robin Hood. Ridley said that Russell would play both roles, but he wouldn’t comment any further. He only said that Russell as Robin Hood and the Sheriff would be “a good old clever adjustment of characters. One becomes the other. It changes.” Sybil for the Middle Ages!

Ridley also confirmed that shameless slut Sienna Miller is playing Maid Marian. Russell’s wife better lock his dick up and pour a little holy water on it to keep it safe from Sienna.

Ridley and Russell should take this concept a step further. Russell should play all the roles. He definitely has the belly of wonder needed to play Friar Tuck. He also has the huge titties for Maid Marian. And Russell likes to sing, so he can easily cover Bryan Adams‘ “Everything I Do (I Do It For You).” Win!

Travis Barker has been released from the Doctors Hospital in Augusta, GA and is on his way back to Los Angeles. His rep issued this statement to People: “Travis is doing great and was discharged this morning. He has left Augusta.”

Travis and DJ AM were both admitted into the Joseph M. Still Burn Center nine days ago after a plane crash in South Carolina took the lives of 4 people. Travis suffered second and third degree burns to his torso and lower body.

DJ AM was released from the hospital this past Friday.

Aubrey O’Day’s dog Ginger must have been one evil bitch in a past life to get stuck with this raggedy tramp. Animal cruelty never looked so skanky. Poor Ginger. I can see the diseases gleefully jumping from Aubrey’s ass thermometer to Ginger’s little tongue. If Aubrey wanted to make out with Ginger, she could have at least put a dental dam over her mouth and spared the animal from her germs.

Here’s more of Aubrey in a towel doing illegal and intimate things with her dog at a Sheiki Jeans in San Diego, CA. In the last thumbnail, it looks like Ginger is trying to hide the tears.

Fashion designer Kris Van Assche showed his new collection in Paris the other day and you would never ever guess what his inspiration was. His collection was loosely (very loosely) inspired by gorgeous cholita beauties! The hell?! Kris included teardrop tattoos, tank tops and boxer shorts which he said was influenced by cholitas. I’m sorry, but I don’t even get the slightest whiff of a Sharpie in any of these pictures.

Homeboy and I need to take a trip down to Echo Park, CA, so that we can hang with my cousins and he can see what real cholita glamour is. Where’s the white wife beater, the hickeys on the cheek and neck, the oversized Dickeys and the nameplate necklace? I see none of that! He could have at least added a “Smile Now, Cry Later” t-shirt. Something! The eyebrows aren’t even right. I give him a couple of dildo slaps for trying, but it’s not quite there.

Kris, please watch this clip from one of the greatest movies ever made “Mi Vida Loca” and then try again.

Visit Style.com to see more pictures from Kris’ Spring ’09 collection.

I’m talking about your fucking heels! Where are they? Her heels must be overworked, because she gave them the day off this past Friday in NYC. Posh Beckham wore these $6,000 Antonio Berardi PVC boots while hawking her fragrance with Becks at Macy’s. $6k and they don’t even have heels?! Bitch got ripped off!

These things make her look even more like a praying mantis alien. These boots are not made for walking, but they are made for gliding along the craters of Mars.

Cristiano Ronaldo and his perfectly manicured eyebrows have a calendar – A Socialite’s Life

Even trolls don’t want to knock it with Jeremy Piven – Celebitchy

Amy Wino knows she’s a mess – I’m Not Obsessed

Squinty Zellweger in a seriously fug dress – ICYDK

Michael Cera doesn’t want to be famous – Mollygood

Hot tub in a dumpster – Boing Boing

Katy Perry’s doll is pretty hot. Probably because it looks nothing like her annoying ass – SOW