Jesse Goes to Rehab

March 22, 2007 / Posted by:

A couple of weeks ago the Desperate Housewives gardener, Jesse Metcalfe, was spotted acting like a drunken fool at the Mondrian Hotel. Witnesses say he was out of control and looked like he hasn’t slept in days. Well, his rep issued this statement:

“On Monday, March 19, Jesse Metcalfe entered a rehab facility to deal with alcohol issues. He realized he had a problem and was anxious to deal with it immediately. The actor, best known as the hunky gardener on the ABC show ‘Desperate Housewives’ and the star of the film ‘John Tucker Must Die,’ hopes that the media will allow him the privacy to deal properly with his treatment.”

I love that in the statement his rep has to remind us who he is, because most of us have no idea. He’s probably in rehab for being gay! I mean he’s trying to pretend he’s straight and all by dating that British chick, Nadine Coyle.


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The CAPTION THIS Contest Winner for March 21st!!!

March 22, 2007 / Posted by:

Kawasaki Ninja Motorcycle = $4,000
Approximately 28-year supply of fried foods = $102,000
Size 28 stretchy shorts on her size 42 frame = $53.00
Seeing a 400-pound hog stradling another 400-pound hog? Priceless. – Anonymous


Somehow, I don’t think this is what he meant when he ordered the new saddle bags for his bike. – MJF

Birthday Sluts

March 22, 2007 / Posted by:

William Shatner (76)
Cody Gifford (17)
Reese Witherspoon (31)
Elvis Stojko (35)
Cole Hauser (32)
Matthew Modine (48)
Lena Olin (51)
Fanny Ardant (58)
Andrew Lloyd Webber (59)
Stephen Sondheim (78)


Pete Doherty is a Great Male Role Model

March 21, 2007 / Posted by:

I’m not sure how old these pictures are, but they it’s Pete Doherty with Kate Moss’s daughter Lila Rose spending some qt.

First of all, the sore on his mouth is amazing. Second of all, the ciggie near her is even better.

I’m guessing he was high as a kite during this little get together. I’m also surprised that Pete trade her in for an 8-ball.


KFed Will Keep Kids and Take $20 Million

March 21, 2007 / Posted by:

Brit Brit Spears is out of rehab, but that doesn’t mean KFed will hand over JJ and SPF. KFed along with Brit’s mother and his mother have been taking care of the boys while Brit was in the tank. He will maintain full custody and Brit will have visitation rights. She will slowly take over custody as she proves herself.

The two have apparently also figured out a divorce settlement. Britney will reportedly give KFed $20 million for their two year divorce. He will also receive half of the sale from their Malibu mansion.

Britney being a drunken mess is the best thing to happen to KFed. Go figure. Not only does he come out looking like father of the year, but he also is getting away with $20 million plus! He’s totally going to smoke up all that dough.

How is she going to pay his ass? Isn’t ho going broke?

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