Danielle – The only likeable bitch on that piece of trash show “Stylista”

Joel McHale (37)
Cody Linley (19)
Tyga (19)
Dan Byrd (23)
Kimberley Walsh (27)
Nadine Velazquez (30)
Josh Turner (31)
Dominique Dawes (32)
Davey Havok (33)
Callie Thorne (39)
Mike D (43)
Ming-Na (45)
Sean Young (49)
Bo Derek (52)
Mark Gastineau (52)
Joe Walsh (62)
Joe Biden (66)
Richard Dawson (76)
Estelle Parsons (81)
Kaye Ballard (83)

I have so many questions about these moob holders from Japan. They have obviously been watching “Seinfeld.” It’s The Bro!

First of all, the dude in the ad doesn’t even want to wear one. He’s covering his chesticles in fear. Second of all, this is a fetish thing, right? Third of all, these are basically just women’s bras put on manly mannequins. Fourth of all, I really, really love the Japanese.

This shit is almost better than The Manpon!

This B- list R&B singer just had her second abortion that her A list producer/singer boyfriend made her get. He says he doesn’t want anymore kids and that if she wants to be with him then she needs to stay childless. I don’t know if she is on birth control or not. I just know the details of what happened. She did get a nice $200,000 piece of bling after the first abortion. No word on what she got after this most recent one. (CDAN)

Ew. He should have bought her ass $100,000 in birth control pills and used the other $100,000 to buy his ass some condoms.

WHICH hit television show sidekick kicked an aspiring actress out of his cab after she refused to go to his apartment with him to “cuddle over milk and cookies”? (Page Six)

Dorota from “Gossip Girl”? Or Chuy from “The Chelsea Handler Show”? My one serious guess is Eric Mabius from “Ugly Betty”? And “milk and cookies” is not a delicious snack, right? It’s probably some nasty ass sex act.

WHICH talk-show host has a flatulence problem so bad, he’s said to have an assistant follow him around with an odor-vaporizing spray can? (Page Six)

Jay Leno? He looks like he has the farts in a bad way.

Which globally acclaimed band is on the verge of splitting up because the egomaniacal frontman hogs all the limelight? (3am Girls)

Coldplay?

This celebrity made quite an impact on Celebrity Rehab. He was a real challenge for Dr Drew. He and his girlfriend were at a celebrity event when they happened to meet a man and his wife who were huge fans of the rehabbed performer. The couples started chatting and our rehab guy was so flattered that he invited the pair over for dinner. When the admiring couple arrived at the celebrity’s house they were startled to see large nude photos of the girlfriend hanging on the walls. The “rehabber” offered the visitors wine and an array of pills! The guests were horrified but before they could leave the celebrity invited them to strip down for a “sexy swing session.” The frightened pair ran off without getting a chance to tell the celebrity that the woman was an ordained minister! (Janet Charlton)

Never ever step inside Jeff Conaway’s house, unless you want to see a naked ass Vikki. And yes, that’s my guess.

I feel like it’s been a while since Posh brought her medicine ball chichis out to play. They look harder than ever! Her steel ball chichis are two dangerous weapons.

When Posh accidentally bumps into the shower door in her bathroom, the whole things shatters. She walks into a wall and leaves a huge hole in the sheet rock. She hugs one of her boys and he gets the wind knocked out of him. Becks tried to titty fuck her once and he ended up in the ER with a broken boner. Her dress straps broke shortly after these pictures were taken.

Don’t ask me how her twig ass walks with those rock hard titties. Her spine must be made out of Tungsten.

Some dude with crazy running through his veins has been stalking and harassing Jennifer Garner since 2002. It’s gotten so bad that Jennifer is afraid for the safety of herself and her family. She already has a restraining order against him, but her lawyers will go into court tomorrow and ask a judge to make it permanent.

TMZ got a hold of some documents that state her stalker Steven Burky follows her around the country, sends her creepy love letters and writes about her on the Internet. He once showed up on her front door and said, “God has sent him a vision of her being persecuted in some manner that may result in her death.”

Jennifer said in the papers, “I now fear not only for my personal safety, but also for the safety and well-being of those that I love and care about most, including my husband and daughter. Also, I am currently pregnant and fear for the safety of my second child once born.”

The LAPD is involved in the case. Sources tell TMZ that Seven Burky is currently under a 5150 psychiatric hold.

Jennifer Garner is one of the few boring oatmeal people that I actually don’t mind. It’s weird. Whenever I watch her in interviews, I try to say something bitchy, but the words don’t come out of my mouth! And when I see her smile, I smile and that just makes me want to go take an Epsom salt bath.

Because I do like Jennifer Garner, I will do her a favor and legally change my name to “Jennifer Garner.” We can trick her stalker into thinking I’m the real Jennifer Garner, so he can leave her alone for good. He’s crazy. He won’t know the difference. He’s also kind of hot. Well, he is! Although, he will have to change the tone of his love letters. I just read a few of them on TMZ and he’s going to need to write less about “visions” and more about dirty sexy things.