This Should Be Illegal

Parasite Hilton has confessed that she wants to have children. She said that hanging out with Britney Spears put the maternal instinct in her. I don't think there's room for anything maternal in that skank's body.
She said, “It’s been my dream to have four babies by 30. I look after animals, so I’d have a lot to give my kids."
She looks after her animals?! Does she mean the crabs living in her twat, because ho does not take care of her animals! She leaves them places and starves them to death! I mean poor Tinkerbell send smoke signals everyday to get out of that dump!
Seriously, the courts should ban this piece of trash from ever reproducing! I still have faith in our justice system. But we might not have anything to worry about. I'm sure her vagina is so toxic that it will kill any living thing that goes in.
Actor Falls to His Death After Fighting With Pete Doherty

Pete Doherty attended a party on Sunday at a London flat of one of his friends. At the party, Petey got involved into a fight with actor, Mark Blanco. Witnesses say the fight became physical.
A witness said, “Blanco arrived at Paul’s a little drunk. He and Pete started to niggle each other. It turned into a full blown argument, with insults being thrown on both sides. The argument got physical and Roundhill (apt. owner) stepped in to break it up. He then asked Blanco to leave. A few minutes later some lads came rushing up to say there was a man lying in the street.”
Mark fell from the second story and was rushed to the hospital where he later died. The police are investigating and are interviewing party goers. Petey was said to have left shortly before the accident and went directly to his hotel.
The hotel said, “There is evidence he took drugs, the carpet’s wrecked, there are smashed up bottles everywhere and the place is covered in blood.”
Petey the murderer!!! Oh well even if he did do it he will be found not guilty and only have to pay $400. The police love them some Doherty!
Future White House Poster Child to Be Born!

Vice-President Dick Cheny's daughter, Mary Cheney is expecting her first baby with her lesbian lover. Mary is acting as the oven for her partner of 15-years, Heather Poe. The pair are very excited. The Washington Post reports:
It's a baby boom for grandparents Dick and Lynne Cheney: Their older daughter, Elizabeth, went on leave as deputy assistant secretary of state before having her fifth child in July. "The vice president and Mrs. Cheney are looking forward with eager anticipation to the arrival of their sixth grandchild," spokesman Lea Anne McBride said last night.News of the pregnancy will undoubtedly reignite the debate about gay marriage. During the campaign, Mary Cheney was criticized by gay activists for not being more publicly supportive of same-sex marriage. Her father said people "ought to be free to enter into any kind of relationship they want to" but deferred to the president's policy supporting a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriages. Cheney herself called the proposed amendment "a gross affront to gays and lesbians everywhere" in her book, "Now It's My Turn: A Daughter's Chronicle of Political Life," which was published in May.
I hope George Bush will be the godfather!!! I'll shut my fat mouth on what the baby will look like. They are happy and there's nothing more than I love to see happy dykes. Especially when they are the offspring of damn morons!
Thanks Henway
Are These Two Still Together?

Lance Bass and Reichen whatever-his-lame-name-is were reported to be broken up. However, Lance posted on his MySpace yesterday that the two are going through issues but will work it out.
He said,
Yes Reichen and I have gone through a few rough days.. but instead of dealing with it by ourselves we get the honor of everyone joining in on our pain! lol No worries... I have no doubt things will work out. We are very mature and deal with things the right way. Thank you for all your concerns! It does mean a lot when so many of you are begging us to stay together! Just please don't believe most the hype you read... like us opening up the relationship?! What the hell does that mean anyway? I mean I think I know what that means... and if it is.. then the answer is def NO!
The two never officially said they were broken up, but both were spotted with new dudes. Who the hell is concerned with them?! I kind of like Lance Bass and thinks he should settle down with Doogie Howser and stay away from Reichen's creepiness. That being said, if he ever broke up with his highlights I'd be devastated.
Who Bought Holly Golightly's Dress?

Audrey Hepburn's black gown worn famously in Breakfast at Tiffany's sold for around $800,000 at Christie's in London. The dress was designed by Givenchy and is a size 6. The bidding war ended when a mysterious telephone caller won the auction, paying 6 times more than the original estimate. The auction also broke records for the highest bid for a gown in a film.
Rumors are that Posh Spice purchased the dress. Posh already owns one of Audrey Hepburn's diamond chokers and has expressed interest in the lot. Posh's spokeswhore said, "I have no idea if she's been involved in the bidding."
Christie's would of course not comment on who won the bidding, but did say they lived in Europe.
$800,000?!!! Hell, you can buy a similiar won at Windsor Fashions for $80 I'm not joking!
Ghetto!!! Child Services Wants Brit Brit!

Deja vu y'all! Britney Spears has been receiving calls from the Los Angeles Department of Child and Family Services. CFS spoke to Britney before when she kept dropping her kids and shit. Well, this time they want to speak to her and set up a time when they can come out and check on JJ and SPF. Her recent nights out with Fat Elvis aka Brandon Davis and flashing her burnt bagina may have triggered this.
A source said, "The department has been calling Britney trying to set up a meeting with her, so they can check on [Spears' baby sons Sean Preston and Jaden James]. The calls started after this recent bout of bizarre public behavior."
Britney's mother and her family members are also concerned for Brit Brit. They are apparently trying to stage an intervention to curb her partying and her associations with certains pieces of trash.
Please, I'm sure her brats are fine. She has the money to pay some hos to take care of her kids while she's busy airing the coochie. Child Protective Services needs to focus on the skanks that really don't know how to treat their kids. It was just a bad couple of weeks for this piece of trash. She just needs to get it out of her system. I hope.
The CAPTION THIS Contest Winner for December 5th!!!
Just another Britney pic complete with labial folds, purple clitoral hood and dog face - evangeliquia
Runner-up:
Tori Spelling and her stylist get ready for her garage sale. - Tortilla Monster
Click here to see all the entries!
Birthday Sluts

Ryan Carnes (24)
Stephenie LaGrossa (27)
Lindsay Price (30)
Colleen Haskell (30)
Janine Turner (44)
Nick Park (48)
Tom Hulce (53)
Richard Edlund (66)
Jen & Vince Break-Up For Real

Reps for Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn have announced that the couple are done and that Jen is a man. Ok, not the last part. The statement reads:
"After Jennifer's trip to London several weeks ago, Jennifer and Vince mutually agreed to end their relationship, but continue to be good friends today." The two began dating last summer. For the past few weeks break-up rumors surrounded them.
The couple began dating last summer while working on The Break-Up in Chicago. "She's awesome," Vaughn told PEOPLE in June 2005. "She has just a wonderful warmth and likeability about her." Rumors of a romance began to swirl almost immediately when they started filming – especially after the costars appeared touchy-feely at the film's wrap party last year – but both insisted they were just friends. Aniston told Vanity Fair, "I adore Vince Vaughn, but I'm not going out with Vince Vaughn." Vaughn told Katie Couric on the Today show at the time, "(Jen's) been great, and we've been having a great time shooting the movie. But that's really been the extent of it."
Vince is now free to mate with his true love, Stay Puft Marshmallow man. Seriously they are twins. Jen is free to...well.she's free to um...ugh can't she just go away!!!!


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