Hot Slut Of The Day!
In honor of the day after the day you spent $65 on last-minute Sunday delivery at FTD because your drunk ass forgot to get your mom a gift on Annual Mama Je'e' Day, here's Bridget, a 10-year-old Yorkie who is foster mommy to five tiny pussies at Utah's Humane Society. It's Sunday, I'm all the way hung over, it's Mother's Day and what we all really need is a beautiful interspecies maternal love story!
MSNBC says that Bridget's journey to motherhood started out with a major case of the dads. Bridget birthed out two puppies at the end of April, but their time on earth didn't last long and they quickly floated up to heaven. One of the employees at the Humane Center decided to place a littler of five kittens with Bridget and it wasn't long before they were all calling her "meowther" (I've just GONGed myself for that one by banging my head my screen)! The Human Society says that they all love each other and the kittens are growing thanks to Bridget's maternal affection and her dog leche. Hopefully, Bridget's babies paid tribute to her today by getting her an appointment at the groomers, because bitch needs a hot oil treatment and a blow out bad.
Happy Mother's Day to Bridget and to all the mother's who let us barf on their shoulders, picked our stuck mocos out with her fingers and taught us life's most important lesson: how to shit in a toilet. If you haven't gotten your mom a gift yet, it's not too late to do what I did, order her a strip-o-gram! ("I wish he wasn't kidding" - my mom as she stares at the giant basket of apples and fucking pears I got her)