Being A Crazy Bitch Is Paying Off For Charlie Sheen
Charlie Sheen's "My Violent Torpedo of Truth" (which is what White Oprah calls a bottle of vodka) tour sold out Radio City Music Hall TWICE and is on its way to selling every single ticket on every single one of its 21 dates. Hos just can't get enough of seeing a half-melted bobble head abuse the word "winning" over and over again. I can hate all I want, but Charlie Sheen is the one letting a warlock cackle as his hooker fund fills with mountains of cash.
TMZ is saying that Charlie's contract with Live Nation states that he gets 85% of all profits from ticket sales. That doesn't include any cash Charlie will make from hosting after parties and selling merchandise like jars of tiger menstrual fluid and crack pipes shaped like Chuck Lorre's head. TMZ estimates that Charlie will make a minimum of $250,000 for each show, which means his final take will be around $7 million.
Ain't that a bitch. There's dozens of homeless crackhead hobos in NYC who wear coats made of scabies, socks made of fungus and regularly spit out insane conspiracy sonnets to the masses. Yet, all they get is a few turned down eyelids and maybe a Canadian quarter. Where the hell is their "Crazy Hobos of Comedy" national tour?! We seriously need to speak to the person in charge, because this shit ain't right.
• 
Submitted by Soultonic on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 11:52am.
I'm so sick of everyone cheerleading asshole celebrities because they can milk as much publicity possible instead of actually doing what they're paid to do.
He IS the joke.
Charlie Sheen was just lucky enough to be surrounded by fucking cameras in the process of losing his mind. That makes you a genius, how?
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
I stand by my diagnosis of Charlie as a bipolar person who is in a severely manic episoide and I really hope I'm right.
Not because it's important for me to be right, but because if he is not crazy and not on drugs or booze, I just can't wrap my head around the fact that he is perfectly clean, has excellent brain chemistry and is THAT BIG OF AN ASSHOLE.
_________________________________
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
Kind of sad and sick people are (most likely) paying to watch a mentally ill person during a manic episode
_________________________________________
Yea it would be good of us to say "No Charlie, we are not coming to this stupid shit to reinforce and prolong your insanity. I hope this makes it obvious to you that you need to get help", but unfortunately it is human nature to do otherwise. I'm buying my psychaitrist a ticket. Imagine seeing him during his meet and greet. So unsetteling. I would so do that if I could afford it.
Remember in the 90's when people said "hey, its the 90s right?"
In a way he's just auditioning for his old job back. If not that, then a new job on another network.
How will he keep going from gig to gig? Strong black coffee.
* * * * *
"She used to say that love was a fire to warm fools."
Submitted by coca on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 2:17pm.
I hope the stagehands wheel a toilet bowl downstage and Charlie takes an hour and 15 minute dump while reading the NY Times.
__________________________
Now THAT I would pay good money to see.
That picture...that fucking picture...
Michael K! You are brilliant. An urban Woody Guthrie!
"There's dozens of homeless crackhead hobos ... regularly spit out insane conspiracy sonnets to the masses. Yet, all they get is ... maybe a Canadian quarter."
That is frickin beautiful! Good show!
*throws MK a Canadian quarter*
____________________________________
Hello, Charlie dumb fuck. You better get some good writers cuz you're way out of material.
.
.
He has never been so popular as he is now.
why is everyone so shocked???
didn't you know that Charlie Sheen AKA Carlos Estevas...is actually Carlos LUCIFER Estevas Jr.
Yeah, the Son of Satan!!
So of course he's gonna rake in the bucks!!!!
He looks so haggard right now cause he hasn;t been back home for so long! He needs to hang out & chill back in Hell to recuperate!!!!
Kind of sad and sick people are (most likely) paying to watch a mentally ill person during a manic episode.
I get embarrassed for those that say "Winning, duh!" as if it's both cool or funny.
"My Violent Torpedo of Truth"
This is what I use to tell the girls on Friday night in the backseat of my car right before they ball-slapped me.
Submitted by Vermithrax on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 3:14pm.
That "winning" shit is played the fuck out.
-----------
WORD
I don't get why anyone would make this moron any richer?
That "winning" shit is played the fuck out.
Who cares what you losers think...That's 7 bigguns in the bank...Winning...
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Welcome to Chazzers World...It's all about winning, you losers...
I hope the stagehands wheel a toilet bowl downstage and Charlie takes an hour and 15 minute dump while reading the NY Times.
Because that's what his audience deserves.
I just looked through and read the previous comments. All my questions were answered. I apologize for the redundancy of my previous post. Normally I would have checked through before posting, mah bad. Anyway, I agree with those that said after 5 minutes people are going to be disappointed. (Sorry about the long rant).
Charlie knows how to market himself and capitalize on his notoriety. After all, he's been doing just that for the extent of his career. For this I fart in his general direction. I do hope these funds will go to his child support payments and care of his kids, more importantly - the twins. Those boys really need to be out of both his and Brooke's care, forever. I wonder if most these ticket buyers realize, we have only seen the edited for TV Charlie. Of course producers keep the interesting and scandalous shit, they don't air the boring bits. If you're stuck for 75 minutes in a seat listening to him go on and on, you're going to be disappointed. There's no two ways about it. He's not a stand up comedian nor is he a preacher. I refuse to believe he's capable of remaining interesting in a one sided conversation for that long. This "tour" makes a very valid point, our society has a tendency to be rather disillusioned on reality.
If Charlie were any other cracked out, unemployed, slightly psychotic bigot; we would just walk quickly by and not look back. In fact we'd probably pity him but definitely not support (both monetarily and ego wise). I understand we all like a good train wreck but this is seriously stupid.
He's donating one dollar per every ticket sold? That's it? 1.00. A dollar does not register as doing much in the way of donations. Why doesn't he donate 10%, of each ticket (which is still rather small)? He has said it himself that he's well off. A well off person wouldn't donate a measly dollar. At least 10% would be an admirable effort. He's coming across as greedy and needing a tax / karma write off. A dollar is something but as a whole remains nothing much. He's like some that want to say their opportunist behavior is O.K because it was towards a cause. Even with 10% being donated he's going to walk out + millions. He will have a merchandise for sale during his show, press junkets and other misc things which will bring him money. I promise there will be $20.00 posters and $50.00 hoodies for sale.
The joke remains on the Sheen supporters. Those that are constantly saying Sheenisms, the bigots who think they found their messiah - that excuse their behavior (in their eyes.); are stupider than Charlie.
For certain. We should start paying more attention to his fans then Charlie. Seriously. Anyone that doesn't believe this is an act AND views this as normal or "O.K" are the scary ones. For sure.
Warlock, Inc. is buying all the seats -- and they'll fill it with hos and homeless when they get there. That's just how dumb ass addict/wankers roll -- Sheen will bail on this mess -- just like Michael Jackson, and have lawsuits from now to Winning Duh eternity. There can't be that many actual real live human beings who would pay money for this mess -- but then again, Sarah Palin was someone's idea of a good political candidate at one time, and many agreed. God I hate people.
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
Submitted by Libressa on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 12:32pm.
The joke isn't on us, the joke's on Charlie.
=======
I get what you're saying but if Charlie is gonna make 7 million dollars from all this, then he is gonna be laughing all the way to the bank. The joke is on us...or more so, the people that buy tickets to his show.
dumb fucks paying to see this peckerhead
our damn kuntry sucks
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Edited to remove redundancy.
The joke isn't on us, the joke's on Charlie. The people that pay him and interview him are just vultures that are waiting for the corpse to drop. Those audiences, the media, and "fans" didn't give a damn about him until he went off the deep end. People are so bored and depressed these dsays that they's actually pay top dollar to be present when Charlie has his River Pheonix moment. They want to see it it happen and have their "I watched Charlie die" moment. If it happens on stage, all the better to upload it on YouTube.
What grown man wants to die a buffoon? How's he going to spend the money after he dies? Maybe all those people are really donating money to his kids. Even if Charlie doesn't die, he's still pretty much dead like all the other crackheads. No one ever remembers who they were before the crack turned them into cartoons, either. Once his "fans" get bored and move on, instead of "WINNING" he'll be "WANNING" until he's completely discarded and forgotten.
Then again, Mickey Rourke survived his crash and burn. Maybe twenty years from now Charlie can have his big comeback and get an Oscar nomination for playing a washed up elderly crackhead that lost his career, family, and dignity.
You know life is not fair when a crackhead acn make more in one night than hard-working people can make in a decade!
***************************************
Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
I guess he won't be staying at the Waldorf while in NYC?
Don't promoters, venues, etc. need some sort of insurance? Or is this mental midget underwriting the entire thing himself? My mind is boggled.
Crankenstein
Americans are such rubes
I wouldn't line this fucker's pockets with my post-wipe toilet paper and my kid's booger collection usually reserved for the walls.
**************************************
The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
If i want to hear a crackhead ramble for two hours, i `d call my FIL. At least his bullshit is sprinkled with Vietnam Stories and some hustle-business idea how to make a quick buck.
---------------------------------------------------
fuck those goddamn son of a horses i got better things to do like love landwhale and bake some bread and tell some fuckers to fuck off.----charlie m.
This is a good example of: just cause you do drugs, it doesn't mean you're a stupid person - it just means you like to have a good time. Sheen saw his opportunity to cash in on his scandal and ran with it. I applaud him for this particular business endeavor. The joke's on us...not him.
*************
Don't hate me cause I'm DLeautiful
IF he shows up at all.
IF he is coherent enough to speak.
IF he isn't committed by the Sheen family.
IF he doesn't insult the promoters and audience with invctive full of inflammatory words like "knucklehead" and "gnarly."
IF he doesn't jizz out his Adonis DNA by looking at pictures of himself from 1987.
Then this show might have a chance.
***************************
"I'd hate to have to go around thinking of health & shit like that." Keith Richards, 1997
I don't get it. What exactly is he going to do at these shows?
----------------------------------------------------
It's not that serious.
Submitted by SugarFreeRedBull on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 11:05am.
@La Chaylo - that's ME on micropeen head dahling!
------
Love it!! We can all only hope to be on a micropeen head ;-)
Submitted by babybunny on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 11:33am.
***********************************************
he's donating $1 for every ticket sold, so at least some good will come out of it.
**************************************************
www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Hey Michael K, our Canadian Quarter is actually worth more than your US Quarter, so suck it!
Sent with love,
;-)
To all the people who bought tickets:
Have you seen Sheen's Korner? Is that what you want to do for two hours of your life?
I'll skip it, keep my money and get the best parts on youtube the next day.
Queen of the SCene is funnier than this wackadoodle...I feel sick thinking that this talentless turd is going to be rolling in the millions and people are stupid enough to pay to hear crazy...shit I say crazier shit and think crazier shit than him every single damn day...and where is my sold out tour...fuck life. He better make sure the Japanese get a piece of his pie is all I am sayin'
OURMISSC!!!! LMMFAO at your avie!!!!! haahahahaha
_____________________________________________
Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
LOVELOVELOVE your avi OurMissC !!!
hahahaha!!!! ::knee slap::
Sad. In that picture, Charlie looks like he has had just one too many hits on the bong or the skank. I think his family needs to intervene and get him into rehab fast.
Who gives a fuck about this guy anymore or his stupid crazy rants! Makes me sick that people actually are willing to pay to see this idiot! The novelty wore off two weeks ago.
This media frenzy is reminding me of Howard Beale in "Network" and his rant "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore" and then his committing of suicide On Air to the delight of ratings except this situation hasn't got even a hint of social self-awareness - just self-indulgence, greed and morbidity.
Oh please, who doesn't want to see this? It's the talk of the town and after you've spend major $ to see junk like "Spiderman" or "Adams Family", it's a relief to maybe get a laugh outta the over-priced theater experience.
@Im not creative - YES Love that!
@La Chaylo - that's ME on micropeen head dahling!
__________________________________________________
Cartman (singing): Whenever I see Jesus up on that cross / I can’t help but think that he looks kinda hot.
LOL @ Rachel Dratch. "Everything true except that last part I see on Lifetime Television For Women. Everything else TRUE!"
Over it...this shit played itself out weeks ago.
--------------------------------------
19 Cats and Counting!
THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
Will he even make to to the first show? Live Nation was crazy to book him.
The only piece of joo-ree I'd pay $2,500 for is an Anderson Cooper pearl necklace. - MK
double-post hell
Was his nose always that tilted? Funny the things you notice when a person makes the crazy face.
Submitted by SugarFreeRedBull on Fri, 03/18/2011 - 10:50am.
Is it just me or is he face-channeling Rachel Dratch?
------------------------------
YES, holy shit! You're enjoying your day, everything's going your way, then along comes Debbie Downer!