Tony Hawk Is A Wonderful Husband And Best Friend
What's that saying? Don't eat what you shit? Don't shit on what you eat? Well, whatever it is, Tony Hawk is doing all of it! Tony Hawk is eatin' vagina while sitting on the toilet like he just don't give a shit. The professional skateboarder's second wife was his former nanny, his third wife was his publicist and his current piece is his best friend's wife. Hawk the Cock doesn't need that Ashley Madison bullshit, he trolls for a piece on his Facebook network. Tony Hawk is keeping it all in the family.
Tony filed for divorce from his third wife Lhotse Merriam back in February and at that time released a statement saying they are committed to being loving parents to their daughter. Blah. Blah. Blah. But behind that precious image of Tony and Lhotse smiling gleefully for their daughter, the word "ESCANADALOOOOO" is in giant lights behind them. Page Six says that Tony pushed Lhotse down the ramp to ByeBitchville shortly after he started getting with the wife of his best friend and business partner Matt Goodman.
Matt and Tony have been friends since childhood and the former has been a groomsmen at all three of the latter's weddings. They founded a sports movie company together, but Matt has since quit that bitch for another media company.
Lhotse first sniffed out Tony's affair with Matt's wife Cathy when she found out the two were traveling together to San Francisco for what was supposed to be business. Tony and Lhotse split up a month later. Matt and Cathy, who were married for 20 years, also dropped their wedding rings into the compost pile.
Tony must have the stuff that makes a lady's clit do a flip trick, because homeboy looks like if Toucan Sam got botched rhinoplasty. Tony is smart, though. One of the annoying parts of starting a new relationship is having to introduce your new lovah to everybody. Tony doesn't have to bother with that, because all of his girlfriends have sat at the family table before.
But there's still a tornado of awkward moments coming their way. I mean, any time Tony meets one of Cathy's lady friends, she'll have to introduce him as: "My boyfriend and probably your future boyfriend."
• 
wow big surprise...
this douche bag can have anybody...
hawk is forever in animal chin land...
here's your hero folks
Wonderful.
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Submitted by Inigo Jones on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 5:34pm.
And that's why I vehemently refuse to be in a relationship. This shit here.
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
Holy Shit. Since I am pretty much regarded as a grade A cunt myself around here, let me be the one to say it: There is such a thing as having a difference of opinion. What pisses people off is when you have one opinion one second and another the next. Having said that, at least when I have read PSL's comments, they at least sound like they are all coming from the same person.
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 07/08/2009 - 5:00pm.
Karen Flatts is always a cunt
Submitted by Sexy Pants on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 3:12pm.
he traded in a "Lhotse" for a "Cathy"?
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What is wrong with the name Cathy?
Everybody has the potential to cheat; it takes real willpower not to when the opportunity presents itself or when, say, you're frustrated, unhappy, or bored.
However, speaking as a guy, I think men cheat more often and willingly, just cuz they go from zero to hardwood in seconds. I swear there's some biological imperative, too. That ain't nice but it exists.
Submitted by Albatross on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 12:18pm.
What kind of name is Lhotse? How the f do you even pronounce that?
It's a huge 8,000m peak south of Everest--part of the same massif. (If you picture Camp IV on Everest, where all the south-side climbers stage before attacking the top, Lhotse is the backdrop.) Not sure what it is in Nepalese but it's "LOT-see" in English.
I agree with all sentiments that the women are just as guilty except the first of course. Either way it sucks, he's breeding with each one. My ex lost each girl to his childhood friend (no lie). I'm the only one that had morals apparently. He remained friends with each, attended the weddings as the best man! I don't think he's sane and I think he's ex's are skags. That felt good to say :D
Now there's a quick way to off load the missus - apply to be the new best man.
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"I still wouldn't..." - Satan
That's fucked. I've met him socially a few times and had him pegged as a decent guy. I'm usually a good judge of character. :(
He looks like he'd have a huge dick in addition to being one.
poor stoney
I'd still hit it. We can have our own little Boom Boom Huck Jam. Hiyooooo.
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you seem spritely.
watch me rant: http://www.youtube.com/user/gineriella
he traded in a "Lhotse" for a "Cathy"?
anywho....who's lazy, selfish and arrogant? Not Ashley Judd, Tony Hawk is!
too lazy and selfish and arrogant to give a fuck where he trolls for his newest piece!
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I mean, we should ALL look like Richard Simmons at least one time in our lives-MK
Crankenstein
He can't help himself. But why keep getting married? The worst part it his best bud for years - he is a douche bag
"my dear"
*projectile vomits*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
WOW. Let's see...You're partially right. I wasn't happy for two and a half out of the last four years. I'm sure we can drudge up my entire life and hash it out here for you to pick apart, since you apparently remember everything. I'm sorry I wasn't a ray of sunshine in your existence built of rainbows and butterflies and perfect men.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
And my sons wear all his clothes :(
http://www.sceneoutlines.blogspot.com
go back and read your posts from the past 4 years. Look at the happiness you radiate, my dear. I NEVER said I was your friend.
In your words, "stop putting words in my mouth".
DROP IT. You want to be left alone? Then DROP IT.
JFC
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And we'll drink and dance with one hand free
And have the world so easily
And oh we'll be a sight to see
Back in the high life again
"40-year-old skateboarder."
*laughs insanely*
Homeboy seems to feel the grass is always greener. If I were his friends, I'd be thinking twice about hanging with him.
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"I'd hate to have to go around thinking of health & shit like that." Keith Richards, 1997
HAH!! It's real concern, everyone! Real friends always insist that your life sucks and you need help!!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
yep, you sound really happy in all your posts. It is not fake concern.
Leave ME alone, and I shall do the same. K?
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And we'll drink and dance with one hand free
And have the world so easily
And oh we'll be a sight to see
Back in the high life again
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 12:19pm.
I agree.
It annoys the hell out of me whenever people entitle a gender to behaving a certain way because of "hormones".
My hormones cause me to feel violently depressed and angry once a month, does that reward me the right to go all crazy bitch on everyone for looking at me the wrong way? Do I get to kick whoever I want in the throat for a week out of the month? Afterall, it's not my fault! It's my hormones that are responsible for those impulses!
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
I am happy. Thanks for your fake concern. I was just sticking up for short chicks back in the Britney thread, and it ended as a joke, so why don't you grt the stick out of your butt and lighten the hell up and leave me ALONE.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
yes, "allegedly". ha.
that's right. You are always the victim, I forgot. I sincerely hope you learn how to be happy Stoney. The world will be a much nicer place for you.
***********************************************
And we'll drink and dance with one hand free
And have the world so easily
And oh we'll be a sight to see
Back in the high life again
I really don't like cheating, and I'm aware that under few circumstances that it's understandable but the exceptions seldom actually happen in real life, so for the most part, grow a pair and break up with them for Christ's sake. People make bad decisions and learn, but if you're consciously making it a habit to fuck other people behind your partner's back (Tiger Woods, Jesse James, etc.)? It's time for you to find some courage and tell your partner it's not working.
It's going to smart a little, but is nowhere half as damaging as cheating, even if it is "just for sex". People don't want to admit how powerful sex is, especially in a relationship. Cheating results in feelings of sexual inadequacy which burdens the person who got cheated on in any relationships later on, or I envy your sexual confidence. No, I've never been cheated on but I've never been in any kind of real relationship either.
Everyone gave my one friend from work so much grief because he dumped his girlfriend of a few months because he wasn't interested in her anymore (her lack of personality might've had something to do with it...). Everyone thinks he's such a terrible person for breaking up with her, when in reality, it's the best thing he could have done.
Would he have been a better person for stringing her along for a while longer? Would he have been a better person if he cheated? The point is, the poor guy did the right thing and despite the guilt trips he's been put on, more people should follow his example.
Lastly, if you're going to cheat (and this goes to both sides), at least be more original than to fuck the best friend. Actually, I don't know where these people are finding their best friends, because those are some pretty lousy ones. I've never thought of having sex with someone in a relationship, and I have had the opportunity so don't go there. My friends and I don't even have the same interests in men or sex.
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
He sounds like a real tool. Isn't he a little old to be acting like a horny 21 year old?
Well it can't be his face, must be his dick.
I'm curious now but not curious enough to go back and look at all the Britney threads from last week to find where I allegedly jumped on you.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
He's kinda ugly... reminds me of that actor a long time ago.... Balky, or somesuchfuck....
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It sounds like I'll need to be drunk, stoned and suffering from a minor concussion to deal with this fuckery. MK - November 2008
Goes both ways Stoney. You jumped on me last week on the Britney thread. Give me a fucking break. You are no innocent here. I am not saying I am, but come on.
***********************************************
And we'll drink and dance with one hand free
And have the world so easily
And oh we'll be a sight to see
Back in the high life again
WOMEN ARE CHEATING WHORES!!!
*runs outta thread*
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"poor jacko, trying to struggle thru this world with one eye and the womenz just keep fucking his shit UP!" snowpiece 11/25/09
"I will re-name jackhat, PantyClaus." 12/16/10 BRADIFUL BITCH
what a douche.
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and, not a single fuck was given this day.
"down the ramp to ByeBitchville". Hahahahahahahaha!
In all seriousness, never rub another man's rhubarb. Far too many available options running around for you to fuck around with the WIFE of your friend. This is usually how people end up fairly dead or with a crumbling empire.
--thanks awfully--
What is it about this guy that he can't commit to a long-term marriage and honor his friendships? What a sad excuse for a human being.
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"... a kidney stone that was expelled by the mind of M. Night Shamalamadingdong ..."
maybe it's about perspective. take this situation.
there's one sociopathic schlong slinger who is male.
there are 2 - 3 similarly sociopathic puss flingers involved as well.
puss flinger #1 - the nanny aka wife #2. most folks wouldn't blame a bitch for busting a cap in the ass of the woman who was supposed to look after your child and ended up looking after your husband's penis.
puss flinger #2 - wife #3. hello dummy, he cheated on his first wife with his nanny. and you still married him? 'nuff said. :-S
puss flinger #3 - new piece aka best friend's wife. no words.
and who knows who else is lining up right now to be wife #4? you know there's some trick out there with no sense of self-preservation. :P
The overstatement of assigning a gender to a behavior doesn't change the fact that being a festering cesspool of CHEAT is certainly a tried and true Tony Hawk behavior.
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The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
What kind of name is Lhotse? How the f do you even pronounce that?
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"Now you know what 'rimming' is." -BK
Cliches retorts I learned from my Pop:
"It takes two to tango"
"You made your bed now lie in it"
"A leopard never changes it spots"
All parties involved are fucked up low rent hillbillies. Not just Tony the Toucan. Wife number three knew what happened with wife number two and so on.
However, ex best friend should knock the stuffing out of the dude.
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"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
— William Goldman
MissJane
you sound bitter just remember for every cheating male out, there is some whore cheating with him.
Sounds like Tony is setting himself up for a future in republican politics.
Let's not pretend like this is the first time PSL has jumped on me.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by ditquoi on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 12:03pm.
meaning that he's a 40 year old skateboarder who seems to think it's 1995 and he's still the cool dude at the skate park and all the girls want him cuz he's soooooooo hot so he can pump em & dump em with reckless abandon
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I`m no boarder and I`m sure he`s a class A Dbag BUT a simple 40 year skateboarder he`s not.
The guy took a ``sport`` and helped turn it into a multi-billion dollar industry. He`s is now and cultural icon and has put his stamp on Americana as it were
AND he`s also a low life scumbag...just sayin
Good grief, this site seems to be rife with overly sensitive people lately.
*leaves thread*
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 12:09pm.
THANK YOU.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 12:11pm.
Sorry, but IMO, (notice IMO) cheating in not typical male behavior, it is typical HUMAN behavior.
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I cosign, Cuppy.
You said that I claimed women don't cheat. Obviously anyone with a functioning brain knows that statement isn't true. I happen to think that the WAY in which this a-hole did his cheating, by not bothering to look further than the next set of boobs that walked by him or consider for a half a nanosecond the feelings of anyone involved, is the type of selfish behavior you more often see in cheating men. This is my opinion, which I am completely entitled to, but you clearly hate me and everything I say, so really I don't see any point in any more "rebuttals."
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Sorry, but IMO, (notice IMO) cheating is not typical male behavior, it is typical HUMAN behavior.
Just for the record...saying something is typical male behaviour doesn't mean women aren't capable of it. Women can cheat and be grade A cunts too. I just know waaaaaaay more stories like this..that's all.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Cheating is lame.
Cheating while married with kids is fucked up.
Cheating while married with kids AND with your best friend's spouse? You are a complete sack of shit.