The New Charlie's Angels Have Been Cast And...Eh
ABC could've cast Charo, Quween on the Scene (or Johnny Weir) and Tiger Mom as the new Charlie's Angels, but they decided to give us a Maxim spread instead! That booming NOOOOOOO!!!! you hear isn't God. It's John Forsythe (they go to the same vocal coach) reacting to the news that ABC is moving forward with their pilot of Charlie's Angels and they've already cast their 2011 versions of Jill, Sabrina and Kelly. Drew Barrymore is producing this butcher fest and McG might direct the pilot. And here's the new angels courtesy of TVLine:
Minka Kelly (Friday Night Lights and The Roommate) as Marisa, a former U.S. Marine, a weapons expert trained in all forms of hand-to-hand combat, and a neat freak.
Rachael Taylor (Transformers) as Abby, the youngest and sassiest of the Angels. The beautiful and privileged daughter of a notorious Wall Street crook, she is an expert con artist herself, as well as a Krav Maga expert.
Annie Ilonzeh (General Hospital) as Kate, a very smart and very athletic ex-cop and a master of martial arts. She is the most serious of our 3 Angels but also knows how to let her hair down and have a great time.
The ONLY way they can save this is if they get Andy Rooney as Charlie. Evil will take over the world and the criminals will prevail, because Charlie will keep the Angels on the line and force them to listen to him ramble on about how he hates frozen lima beans and doesn't understand why nobody makes boxer shorts with a poop slot in the back. Now that is a show that would shoot straight to the top of my Netflix Season Pass list.
• 
Robert Wagner was already announced as Charlie. I would have gone with Stephanie Powers.
MK, how can you leave Bobby Trendy out of your fantasy line-up? He could be the sassy one who really knows how to let his hair down.
************
Je suis une meringue ambulante
I don't know any of these tricks. And honestly, was Charlie's Angels ever popular enough to have YET another remake?
ugh. Basta!!
SO SAD. Enough with the remake after remake ... geez, where is the creativity? Start a new show with a new concept ... stop trying to recreate a success. IT was a success when Farrah and the crew did it the first time around. This just looks like a pathetic mess.
And this has nothing to do with race but I'm sorry, there was NO black chic in the original charlie's angels. So if you want to add one - then maybe you should just rename the show because it's not like the original anyway.
They better have Farrah's car-the Cobra II with blue stripes. She had the best car.
Add Emma Stone to this and you've got a hit and I can't believe that this song was in the last remake:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcZyixmxiC0&feature=related
There should be a law against certain tv and movie remakes.
Stop ruining my Wed. night tv memories, which I fought so hard to get from my parents who thought Charlies Angels was porno!!!!
_________________________________
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
Friday Night Lights is one of my all time favorite shows, so I have a small (very, very, very, very small) soft spot in my heart for Minka. But that bitch will be terrible at this because she can't act worth a crap. But this whole thing will be crap anyways, so she'll fit right in.
I've seen Annie Ilonzeh on GH and nothing else. She's not good an actress yet. She's a relative newbie so damn how did she scoop a primetime role so fast?!
"Submitted by Datura on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 4:04pm.
Lol. I'd never heard of her before this post. What did she do?
I do find that a person's arse is a good indication of his or her character, so you might be on to something."
She had some incident on a plane where she was upset because her dog couldn't fly in first class with her. She's also fucking Derek Jeter, which automatically loses 200,000,000+ points in my book.
--------------------------------------
"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.
I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."
Submitted by louise_brooks on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 4:27pm.
He could direct the cinematic masterpiece of the fucking century, but, I am sorry, I cannot think of anyone who goes by "McG" as anything other then a douche beyond measure.
So true. It's only his middle name, too. He's produced some really, really crappy TV.
* * * * * *
"Mary can be such a child. She thinks if you put a toy down it'll still be sitting there when you want to play with it again."
Submitted by TexnDoc on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 5:17pm.
I knew there would be a "sassy" Charlie's Angel. And the "most serious" one was Kate Jackson, who was not black. If they've cast a black, can't she be the "sassy" one? Would be more fun. A little too Aunt Esther?
__________________________________________________
"Watch it sucker!" Ha loved Aunt Esther.
I've been watching watching you watching me... Loose Ends
Are there any original ideas out there in La La Land?
I've been watching watching you watching me... Loose Ends
Hekki--
I would watch the shit out of that. For real.
I predict this will last less than half of one season. The whole plot was thin in the first place, it's basically "Pretty girls wearing sexy outfits go undercover". That merits three different t.v. show versions and two movies, seriously?
Wasn't the first series lame enough?
Wasn't the first series lame enough?
Uh, yeah. No.
**********
"God only gives you one balloonknot, be nice to it." - Raul Duke
I remember in the 80's the tried to redo Charlie's Angels as a TV show and they titled it "Angels88" starring Tea Leoni and 2 other no name actresses. I'm not sure if the pilot even made it onto the air or not because it was scrapped before I ever saw it..
Submitted by pinkdoodoo2 on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 4:51pm.
Isnt Krav Maga just jew for "dirty fighting"? So you crack someone over the head with a nearby beer bottle you can yell Krav Maga bitches!
---------------------------------------------------
@Pinkdoodoo2- How ignorant can one idiotic poster get?! Krav Maga is the official hand to hand combat system of the Israel Defense Forces as well as the preferred system for the US military and law enforcement personnel. I think your brain is full of doodoo you cretin.
"People are strange when you're a stranger...Faces look ugly when you're alone." ~ The Doors
What's next? A remake of Family Matters with a white Urkel? The Godfather? Gone with the Wind?
I knew there would be a "sassy" Charlie's Angel. And the "most serious" one was Kate Jackson, who was not black. If they've cast a black, can't she be the "sassy" one? Would be more fun. A little too Aunt Esther?
Give it a rest people!
Hollywood is so fucking lazy. Now a retread of Charlie's Angels? Bet the scripts stay the same and they just tweak them for the 21st century. Won't be watching.
Now they want to re-make tv shows? Idiots.
Isnt Krav Maga just jew for "dirty fighting"? So you crack someone over the head with a nearby beer bottle you can yell Krav Maga bitches!
____________________________________________
Go Lakers!!!
if you remake these 70s shows and cast nondescript leads and take away all the cool stuff that made the show fun back then, and make it all serious, it will tank because people love some of that nostalgia factor eg. Bionic Woman. The new version didn't have Jaime running with the sound effect or squashing a tennis ball like, wow!
---
Help me!
Submitted by stake_spike on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 4:32pm.
---
Rachael Taylor played Maggie in the first Transformers movie, she was the Australian computer hacker, she stole some file.
---
Help me!
Why?
Wait, I thought McG might be directing the Wonder Woman pilot? (He directed the Charlie's Angels movies)
My fave was always Sabrina. I liked her husky voice.
---
Help me!
No clue who any of these people are. I've heard the name Minka Kelly a few times but that's her? She's not hot. No idea there was an Abby in Transformers. And the last one looks like a VS model.
He could direct the cinematic masterpiece of the fucking century, but, I am sorry, I cannot think of anyone who goes by "McG" as anything other then a douche beyond measure.
It was announced last week that Robert Wagner from Hart to Hart would be Charlie. Other than him, I've never heard of any of these bitches. They are kinda generic.
_____________________________________________
I don't want to possess you, I wish to marry you because I love you.
Look back... look back at me.
Are you coming home with me?
Minka was in "The Kingdom" with Jamie Foxx
Aahahahahaha. This mess will go the same way as Undercovers (RIP)
No idea who any of these cunts are, but the black chick on the right is seriously fucking hot.
Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on Fri, 01/28/2011 - 4:01pm.
Am I the only one who finds Minka Kelly to not only be a horrible actress, but a horrible human being as well?
------------------------------------------
Lol. I'd never heard of her before this post. What did she do?
I do find that a person's arse is a good indication of his or her character, so you might be on to something.
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*
Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
Another Bionic Woman disaster looms then!
They are doing Wonder Woman too you know! (David E. Kelley is writing the pilot).
Who is the target audience for this kind of show? Teenage boys? Young girls? Are they still trying to pretend that this shallow crap is somehow female empowerment?
*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*
Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
Wake me up when they reboot Dynasty.
Nail me to my car... then I'll tell you who you are...Joe The Lion
It looks like Minka's thighs are chewing her va-jay-jay!
***************************************
Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
Am I the only one who finds Minka Kelly to not only be a horrible actress, but a horrible human being as well?
--------------------------------------
"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.
I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."
I will take Boring for $100, Alex
*EYEROLL*
Also, I think that if they really wanted bitches to do stuff undercover, the Angels would look something like this:
Linda: Nosy old Jewish lady who wears Reeboks with everything because her feet hurt. She's bossy and pushy and no one says no to her. Think Ruth Gordon.
Dagmara: Ukrainian cleaning lady. Wearing her powder-blue overall dress and pushing her trash can on wheels with windex hanging off the edge, she can infiltrate any office, hotel or hospital.
Heather: All right, there has to be one MILF.
The only one I've heard of is Minka Kelly and that's only because Derek Jeter has been fucking her for a while. She always looks to me like the lower half of her face is caving in, like she's missing some molars or something.
And she'd better get into the gym so her ass stops oozing out of her shorts like in that pic above. Your BF is an athlete, and a notorious slut. He will move on to another ho if you don't keep it tight in all ways, girl!
sounds like some shit I won't be watching. :P
but from the looks of things, I'm not the target demographic, so whatevs.
That chick on the far left has Courtney Love Buttock and Thigh Syndrome.
WHY the f is Drew SO damn obsessed with Charlie's Angels?!?
Another massive waste of airtime to add some variety to the continually growing glut of shitty reality and 'competition' shows. At least I have South Park and Futurama
DOA
Um............
***************************************
Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
Yawwwwwwwwwwnnn. Is Charlie Sheen dead yet?
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Douchechill!