Italy Is Wrapping Itself In A Giant Boot-Shaped Condom Right Now
Nearly half of the cast of Jersey Whores isn't Italian and they probably think that The Spaghetti Factory is an authentic Italian gourmet emporium, but that isn't stopping them from flying over to their "homeland" to shoot season 4. If they pump one first towards Sicily, Sophia Petrillo better rise from her mausoleum to punch all of them in the face with her pocket book.
TMZ's sources tell them that MTV is about to start looking for the perfect locations in Italy to shoot in. They're also in the process of trying to get work visas for the cast and crew. Pauly D is reportedly filming his own reality shit show right now, and JWoww and Snooki will start shooting theirs this weekend, so who knows when the worst American export since CROCS will make it to Italy.
For real, this might be the best thing MTV has done since making bitches cry "CHILD PORN" about that Skins shit. Watching Snooki stumble down the boardwalk like an Ewok after doing a pinata spin was started to get boring. But watching Snooki stumble through Vatican City before doing body shots off altar boys with the Pope is going to fart new life into that mess. There's also a good chance that Italians will feed their souls to Donatella Versace after finding out who they really are. Whatever happens, this is definitely going to end well.
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@ Submitted by zinnia on Wed, 01/26/2011 - 6:47am.
Have you seen videocracy? A documentary about Berlosconi and Italian TV it was really very interresting and it seems to be quiote the mess in Italy actually! I was sad to see that. Such an amazing country with it's history, culture and beautiful landscape and people. etc. And now turned to this? It's a shame really. :(
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Yes, I own a copy of that documentary. Unfortunately I can confirm it's all true.
My husband and I stopped watching TV 5 years ago. I mean, really. Our tv is connected to a pc and to the x-box. We only watch dvds and files from the pc. And I seriously mean to raise my child this way. There are already so many problems in life, I can spare him some idiocy.
I also don't know what a commercial is, anymore. It's cool :-)
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Silvio Berlusconi, just die already.
They can shoot the show inside Berlusconi's ass. With all the brown goo they already are, they would fit in there just right!
@Submitted by JeanGenie on Wed, 01/26/2011 - 5:19am.
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Have you seen videocracy? A documentary about Berlosconi and Italian TV it was really very interresting and it seems to be quiote the mess in Italy actually! I was sad to see that. Such an amazing country with it's history, culture and beautiful landscape and people. etc. And now turned to this? It's a shame really. :(
You can see it streemed here, it's really a must see:
http://www.atmo.se/film-and-tv/videocracy/
Videocracy
"In Italy, for thirty odd years, the image has been controlled by one man. TV-magnate and Presidente Silvio Berlusconi has influenced the content of commercial television in a way never before done in Italy. His TV-channels, with their young skimpy-clad girls, are seen by many to mirror his own taste and personality.
In Videocracy, Italian-born director Erik Gandini portrays the consequences of a TV-experiment that Italians have been subjected to for 30 years. Gaining unique access to the most powerful media spheres, he unveils a remarkable story, born out of the scary reality of ”TV-Republic” Italy."
Submitted by Dirk Diggler on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 2:38pm.
I was in Termini once (Rome's main train station) and opened a door I shouldn't have. There was this couple behind, stark naked, going at it...
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Oh my, the things I've seen happening in Termini through my 28 years of life.......... Now it's probably being kept better. But there are always some surprises. Like the fact that to reach the underground you have to go through many many levels of stairs, no elevators, so if for whatever reason you're carrying a stroller or else, you must either give up or just sweat your ass off, or ask for help of who's nearby. Last week I was carrying my child on his stroller so I found myself cursing over and over.
Anyway, may I say I'd rather be plagued with Jersey Shore than much of Italian TV programs? And may I say Italy's got so many problems that I find these... "creatures" almost inoffensive, compared to Italy's Prime Minister?
No surprise that Italian TV is completely fucked up. He owns all the main channels, so Italians see what he wants them to see: pussy, tits, news broadcasts filled with matters of national security (as how to lose the holiday dinners weight soon, or the fashion colours of the season, and so on.....) and lies about what's really happening in the country.
The sadness is that a good 50% of the population actually is that stupid, dumb, void.
As for italian "colours", well, it's much more mixed up than most of people think. My father's from the south, he's blonde and green-eyed, and so is my brother. My mother's from Rome, she's got dark hair, redhead brothers and sisters and grandparents, and I turned out a redhead, too.
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Silvio Berlusconi, just die already.
Isn't Snooki like really Colombian or Venezuelan or something? I know her parents are Italian, but she was adopted and (like Nicole Richie) is really a Latina. OMG, did I just say that? She's Italian, she's ITALIAN. Bleh.
Well, I guess the Ugly American stereotype will be alive and well in Italy for centuries to come.
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
Submitted by Koopa on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:03pm.
The Sopranos already did this. Where Tony had that dream of banging Sofia Milos while he was dressed as a Roman centurion.
Now im gonna order Rome off amazon. That show was awesome with it’s gratuitous nudity and Mark Antony showing off his penis.
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Whaaaa...?! *orders Rome on Amazon*
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And I hear your words that I made up. You say my name like there could be an us. I'd best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love, I'm the only one in love.
Adele, "Heart to Stone"
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I think Vinnie, Situation and Pauly D are the only Italians on the show.
Didn't the RHONJ already do this go-to-Italy shit?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Can't stand these shitbags. They should drop them all off on the moon.
Bitches see Snooki coming out of the ocean like that and they'll be all like, "Who released the Kraken?"
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"There is something the matter with you, Caprice...Something is the matter with YOUR VAGINA!"
Dayum those people are freaking U-G-L-Y. The guys all look like they have tire tracks on their fug faces and the girls are all scabs except for JWow (and she is WOW!). That Snookie bitch is so damn short and fat she doesn't even have a neck. I sincerely hope MTV takes its fake reality shows and fucks itself into oblivion.
This lot of zeros probably thinks Chef Boyardee is klassy cuisine.
Let's hope their plane gets lost in the Bermuda triangle.
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"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone
Actually, they will fit right in there. More central Italy than the south though. They can spread give double their STD risks. I use to live in Rome so I know what the scene is like there.
Just watch some Rai tv to see what I mean.
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"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
— William Goldman
LMAO @ Watching Snooki stumble down the boardwalk like an Ewok after doing a pinata spin was started to get boring. Omg, i'm sorry, watching that shit last week was fuckin' hilarious!
Fast food.
The Ford Pinto
Black socks worn with sandals
David Hasselhoff
and now the cast of Jersey Shore.
The worst things ever exported from America.
The only hope civilization has is that the plane carrying them will crash in the north Atlantic. I know that the innocent lives of the other passengers and crew will be sacrificed, but sometimes you have to forgo the good of the few for the good of the many.
Snookie, enjoy honey. Find a good financial manager plan accordingly - your 15 minutes is gonna dry up - GERRY! GERRY! GERRRY! scumbag Gerry Springer trainwreck!
Generation Zero's favorite fecal matter goes international.
With 9 million of you Twilighters watching this shit - good luck America.
OMG yes people hate us cuz of Jersey Shore, not FUCKING WARS!!!!
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"I truly believe that I was born to be a dumb grouchy stoner slut, and I am slowly becoming a bigger one each and every day, so thank you."MK
"WE ATE POSICLES BITCH LAY OFF!!" Jacko
I was in Termini once (Rome's main train station) and opened a door I shouldn't have. There was this couple behind, stark naked, going at it...
lol @ youknowyoucare.com, and as far as the show, its called jersey shore, not italian roomates or whatever. who cares.
I watched 20 secs of this last night. Snooki and J-Woww (?) are way more harsh "IRL" than they appear to be in their still photos.
Only 2 cast members are fully Italian..this is gonna be interesting..see what ethnicity the other members are here: http://bit.ly/gkxWZ0
- YouKnowYouCare.com
yeah you are better off speaking Spanish in Italy.
Never seen their show, but I don't need to to know that these fucking losers give Italians a worse name than the mafia.
Italy is pretty much going to declare war on us after this.
"No One Makes Me Bleed My Own Blood!"
And Americans wonder why every other country besides us thinks were Yankee trash. Big hint: it's dumb fucks like the douchebags on Jersey Shore. Well that and all the other bad shit weve done.
"The legendary Antoine Dodson took to the stage looking like if Mushu from Mulan joined a TLC cover group as Chilli"-MK
I (voluntarily) forgot Snooki is now a published author, so I had to go check the reviews on amazon. Even Pedo Bear has an opinion:
3.0 out of 5 stars Too old., January 21, 2011
By PedoBear "Hey, it's PedoBear!" (Florida,USA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: A Shore Thing (Hardcover)
When I first saw her adorable eyes peering up at me from the bookshelves at my local Barnes & Nobles, I couldn't help but purchase this book. I instantly sat down to read it and then discovered that rather than be about a young lady's journey through the beach filled world of New Jersey, it was about one woman's attempt to get laid. I admire her spirit, but I couldn't help but feel that she was a bit too old for that sort of thing. She really needs to act her age and leave the antics to the younger crowd.
The writing is funny and I appreciated the water sports in the book but overall this is just a sub-par book.
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:48pm.
yeah, i guess we just do it under the bleachers or in cars LOL
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
kanderso/bitchette:
I just got back from Barcelona and I had to explain the phenomenon of people making out all the time on the streets in Italy/Spain because people don't always have a place to take their (in)significant other.
Most young people live at home or have lots of roommates so people there have adopted to trickin' it on the streets with wild abandon.
I remember the first day I moved to Barcelona and I kid you not, I see these two pre-teens going so hard and heavy on the train that *I* needed a cigarette!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN!!!
What's this "half the cast isn't eye-talian" shit? Jwoww is probably your typical lawwng island irish/italian clusterfuck & snooki is from chile. Everyone else passes the test, you jelly h8ing WASPS!!!!
Submitted by azgirl on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:42pm.
you should learn how to order coffee (un cappuccino per piacere) and say please and thank you, good morning, good after noon, good night... and then they will be more than happy to help you, and yes, everyone speaks at least a little english. but don't just start yelling english at them, they will be much nicer if you at least try their language. and- its not that hard for t he easy stuff, it is very similar to spanish
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Submitted by kanderso on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:39pm.
OMG you are not kidding! people making out everywhere and not just teenagers! on the steps, at tables, dry humping in the seats on the train! it was sometimes really uncomfortable for me- and i'm not a prude
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Submitted by azgirl on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:42pm.
Everyone in urban areas speaks English. Menus are in English - - it is easy.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
Oh, also, my friends and I once found ourselves in a club in Rome that was pretty much where old, rich men went to go pick up attractive prostitutes. It took us about an hour to figure it out too...at first, we were just amazed that there were so many hot women there and so few dudes.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
Submitted by kanderso on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:29pm
I want to go there someday but I am always nervous to visit a place when I don't speak or understand their language? Are there a lot of English speaking friendly spots?
Oh and I hope when these losers get over there, real Italians make their lives miserable.
Re: Italian exotic dancing gameshow - - Italians LooOOOVeee their sex. Holy shit, compared to Italians, Americans are complete puritans. I have never seen people go at it in public like I have in Italy. People make out in public CONSTANTLY. My most vivid memory of this was when I was walking around with friends in Rome, in the middle of the day, and we saw a couple making out hardcore beside one of the big public fountains, and the girl had her pants halfway pulled off and this dude was fingering her and you could pretty much see everything down there. They were also kissing passionately and he was grabbing some boobage. Middle of the day, in a semi-crowded area, with kids around. Nobody looked twice, except for us...we were floored. It was one of those things where you really couldn't believe it at first.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
Put them in the Coliseum, and loose the lions and tigers on them. That would be the first and only episode of this total shit I would watch.
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"In the early 1900's with old-timey methods, farmers was losin' 30% of their crops to insects and disease. Now with your modern herbicides, pesticides, insecticides, what have you, they're losin' 30%. Just facts and figgers." - The Accountant
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:29pm.
oh fuck these Losers already. It is sickening how much money they have made. American public, I hate you for giving them this opportunity.
This is what America wants...God help us. To all the college students...stop wasting your money.
welcome to the club Jack!
i love JS
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Snooki is a cross between Kobe Bryant's bratty wife, and Tattoo from Fantasy Island.
The Plane! The Plane!
These assholes make me hate humanity.
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Is this real life? Why is this happening to me? Is this gonna be forever?
Yeah, these dirty skanks should be relegated to Naples and hopefully shot in a dive.
No one would miss them, surely!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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So embarrassing. For the love of god!! WHY MTV!! WHHHY!!
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
I admit it, I watch it. I love it. Go ahead throw things. I like trash. makes me feel better about my life.
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"Second of all, if I lived with a bunch of loud ass kids I'd drink a bottle of wine every night too. And then I'd use that bottle to smoke crack." - MK
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Going to Italy so Snooki can squash grapes with her feet in a wine vat and get into a fight with the local and not get the movie role so Ethel gets it instead - sounds sort of jump-the-sharkish.
oh fuck these Losers already. It is sickening how much money they have made. American public, I hate you for giving them this opportunity.
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I will remember you, will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
-Sarah Mclachlan
Italy is my #1 vacation destination, and I've scrimped and saved to make several trips there (therefore, it totally frosts my cookies that these ruhtards get to film an entire season there). Italians are vivacious people, and sometimes loud and fiesty, but, like most continental Europeans, they are much more refined than someone like Snooki. Most importantly, Italy does not have a binge-drinking culture like the U.S. and Britain. These twats will not fit in.
They should be forced to stay in Naples the entire time. That is the only city trashy and dirty enough for these assholes.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
Submitted by lifeislikecake on Tue, 01/25/2011 - 1:22pm.
Send them to Afghanistan!
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LOL I totally support that...they need to be part of a one-way USO tour...throw Parasite and Lohan into that as well.
"I have your new dicks on my kitchen counter." Tammy Lynn
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no wonder everyone hates anyone from this country.
shit, I would.
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and, not a single fuck was given this day.