St. Angie Tries To Convince Us That She's A Mere Mortal
While Matt Damon honored Robert DeNiro with some fancy award at the Golden Globes (Yes, we're still on those damn Golden Globes) last night, the camera cut to Angelina Jolie applying a thin layer of lip gloss like real women folk do! Saint, please. You know what she was trying to do. Angie promised to forgive all of the executive producer's sins as long as he cut to her doing a menial "human being task" like lip gloss application. Angie wants us to think that her lips aren't made of Athena's labia and therefore don't require lip gloss to keep them luscious. Bitch is trying to be one of us, but you can't trick a trick.
You can't tell from that GIF, but three seconds later Angie handed the gloss wand to one of her servants who immediately transported it to a third world country where it was used to plump the mouth of a needy orphan with tragically thin lips. Angie's lip dust has the power.
As for Angie's dress, some people said that she and Brad Pitt looked like they just fell out of an episode of Dynasty. Um. Those people need to go back to community college to earn more Dynasty credits, because even Alexis Carrington wouldn't wish that fug ass dress on her greatest enemy. That dress looks more like something a memaw of the bride might buy at a JcPenney in 1979. But a memaw of the bride would have the SENSE to wear it backwards.
And she really should've applied some gloss to her forehead vein instead.
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OK Here's the deal:
The VEIN in the forehead comes from too much BOTOX!
A lot of actresses get The Vein in their foreheads when they over-inject. The next time you see a forehead vein, see if they show any movement above the eyebrows, I have yet to see the vein & expressiveness coexist on these faces!
Just sayin...
Fucking schmucks! Chew with your fucking mouth closed douche bag no balls Bradley. Neither one of them can come out with a movie worth watching, because they suck as actors. They just want to continue making a grip. I have no idea why these two bitches still relevant.
Brad and Angie looked so pleased with themselves. Someone should tell them a)it's not 2005 and b) this isn't Europe where they fawn over celebrities that washed up ages ago. You're two actors with A-list name recognition who star in one flop after another. You're no longer moneymakers and as such it's only a matter of time before you're living in some decrepit old mansion with your 50 kids pulling a Baby Jane. GET OVER YOURSELVES. And get the shit eating grins off your faces you washed up hasbeens.
The dress - Iced Shamrock Shake
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:44pm.
I just thought I'd share some wonderful comments from the whack job loons over at Just Jared...
anjie sooo insanely beautiful.i like the vid wer anjie lining her lipgloss…u know….and fixing brads bow….obviously,they went somewer doing der horny thing.sooo delicious!!!!
Wow, just find out what make the gown so shinning is actually Swarovski crystals. No wonder she doesn’t have to wear so many jewel to make her so bright, she just wow inside and out. Kudos for her and BP.
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yeah they are totally right she is a goodess and this green dress on her looks so beautifull because if the color green was human it will be skankelina.
totally her color she looks like a green lizard she just needed that tongue coming in and out,
she is hideous
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*"Sometimes what I actually love to do is go to a farm and get fresh milk or watch a pig get slaughtered." - Jake Gyllenhaal
Submitted by Callie on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 10:35pm.
Brad looks like a yahoo chewing tobakky at the big shindig. Angie looks like the smug senior princess at the prom who acts so unattainable but has slept with half the football team and doesn't yet realize her best years are over.
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LMAO!
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elen sila lumen omentilmo-LOTR
LOL ever since I posted the link
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1347875/Golden-Globes-2011-Ang... lots of ppl from America post comments about Angelina.....thats u guys innit!?!
Submitted by mefunigirl on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 11:43pm.
Submitted by boomsy on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 11:35pm.
@Allessandra: That photo made me LOL; Michael Douglas is totally photobombing...
*snort* I died!
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He looks so excited in the picture, as if he's getting a threesome tonight.
Submitted by boomsy on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 11:35pm.
@Allessandra: That photo made me LOL; Michael Douglas is totally photobombing...
*snort* I died!
fuckin A, that vein is gonna come out & get us like the baby Alien fetus ripping out that chick's womb eeep :O
@Allessandra: That photo made me LOL; Michael Douglas is totally photobombing...
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Remember, the early bird may catch the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese...
Thank you, MK. i'm seeing Ange hit the best dressed lists and i'm thinking wha???? for someone so "edgy" she sure dresses boring as hell.
what the hay was brad chewing on?
Submitted by cake coke and cock on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:39pm.
Is that Angelina with another female? Wow. That's a first. Of course she'd pick some ugly nameless chub. And no, we still don't think you have any friends, Angie.
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Uhm actually she also had a picture taken with Catherine Zeta Jones wich is a considered a beautifull woman
the link here
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1347875/Golden-Globes-2011-Ang...
Brad looks like a yahoo chewing tobakky at the big shindig. Angie looks like the smug senior princess at the prom who acts so unattainable but has slept with half the football team and doesn't yet realize her best years are over.
I think "The Vein" is a shunt that can funnel any drug directly into her brain. I'd like one for myself but in the back of my head. :P
Why were they even there? Did she actually think she might win? Why was Depp there?
The Tourist was an embarrassment....the frozen look on her face when Gervais was ripping it was priceless!
You know he'll be back next year. The GG might even get some advertisers and viewers with him at the helm....
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
That's not actually a vein in her forehead, but the outline of an antenna, used by Illuminati satellites to communicate with celebrity humanoids who were created in a laboratory to influence the gullible world populace. The real Angelina died years ago of an overdose. Fearing the resulting backlash from the public due to a beloved star's passing, Angelina 2000 was created, one of many prototypes who currently walk among the Hollywood elite. Those bastards will stop at nothing. Also, I didn't like the dress.
Brad was all coked up, it is so obvious!! I thought he was gonna chew his whole side of his curious face off last night.
Angelina Jolie looks like a skeleton - emaciated and bony, her eye sockets sticking out. Her hair also looks unwashed and messy, like she just rolled out of bed. How anyone can find her gorgeous or attractive is beyond me. She used to look great about 5 years ago, but now she just looks dull and grey. Oh and horrible dress. Seriously, what an eye sore. Doesnt look attractive on her bony frame at all.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
onthefringe.....that is one of the funniest things I have ever seen! It really does look like them in a few years.
attention whore. when did st. angie ho ever do anything like applying lip gloss in public? WHEN?? and and sandra bullocks bangs...WTF?
Submitted by cake coke and cock on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:39pm.
Is that Angelina with another female? Wow. That's a first. Of course she'd pick some ugly nameless chub. And no, we still don't think you have any friends, Angie.
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I`m sure that trick won some kinda contest too;p Go to the Golden Globes with Brad and Angie! You know they have that shit somewhere, soulless basterds. THAT`s why the Tourist got nominated.
♥ Threadkilla!
I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
~Thomas A. Edison
Own a Ford Hybrid? Be afraid:
http://www.nearescape.ca/
Angie and Brad in a few years:
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://cache.blippitt.com/wp-content...
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The real life horror of Monsanto: David vs Monsanto
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E42ndfjnP1g
black swan sucked and so does natalie portman. so sick of little starlets with their oh so special performances winning over truly deserving actors.
when the fuck will brangelina no longer be news. i want their fans to post here right now what's so gottdamn special about them besides being goodlooking.
What the hell is up with that forehead vein? If it gets any longer it will go to her chin.
i hate this cunt. how much padding was in that dress? thought that forehead vein was going to bust open. thank god they won't be at the oscars.
There's tons of padding in that dress because she is so damn skinny. Daily Mail has pics of her from a few days back. She's skeletal.
KA's picture
Submitted by KA on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 5:38pm.
My saddest moment: I saw her do that and my first thought was, "Oh I wonder what brand she's using!"
I know...I'm ashamed.
HAHA, I thought the same thing! I was like she's like the rest of us girls!!!
Classless. My grandma always told me that ladies do not apply makeup in public!
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 3:00pm.
Submitted by Albatross: "Holy Christ, that VEIN!"
You can see it in the thumbnails. When they're small! I thought it was a smudge because my toddler likes to write on the monitor, but nope, it was her VEIN, which shows up in a 1" x 1" thumbnail.
They probably can't remove it, because it has its own blood supply!
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Argghh! It's bloody huge!(harhar) Srsly, the Red Cross could tap into that and supply blood to an entire third world country. I bet it's a gusher.
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"Face aux moments difficiles, certains d'entre nous sont nés avec le crayon, d'autres avec la gomme. Moi, je n'ai jamais été capable de gommer ce que je vivais. Je dois vivre avec les choses étranges qui m'arrivent."~ Mo Hayder
The dress is fug, but the color? Awesome.
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And I hear your words that I made up. You say my name like there could be an us. I'd best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love, I'm the only one in love.
Adele, "Heart to Stone"
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Submitted by Juniperjump: "When the fuck did shoulder pads come back into style? Not going there. Nope."
Right? I was returning some Xmas presents to Ann Taylor and was kind of interested in this blazer. Looked normal on the hanger, but as soon as I put it on, I saw that it had massive shoulder pads. I looked like Judy Jetson. Totally embarassed, I put that shit back before anyone could see me.
Submitted by barzzini on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 5:59pm.
barzzini
Yeah but Brad looked hella hot for sure. Angie could wear a trash bag and still look fab.
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Only if it was over her face...
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...the end
Submitted by TimC on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 3:30pm.
Forget Dynasty. Is it just me, or is she channeling Sue Ellen Ewing from Dallas? A few crooked teeth and she would be a dead ringer.
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this.yes!
barzzini
barzzini
Yeah but Brad looked hella hot for sure. Angie could wear a trash bag and still look fab.
My saddest moment: I saw her do that and my first thought was, "Oh I wonder what brand she's using!"
I know...I'm ashamed.
She needs to eat something other than unicorn breath, angel tears and all the other hilarious stuff Michael K invents.
She has to wear a granny dress like this because Skeletina can no longer pull off sexy with her anorexic 74 y/o body. Those dresses have to be left for the women with a little flesh (and less veins).
"It's my money and I want it now!"
When the fuck did shoulder pads come back into style? Not going there. Nope.
Sort of says something when the best dressed of the night was probably Catherine Zeta Beta.
Forget Dynasty. Is it just me, or is she channeling Sue Ellen Ewing from Dallas? A few crooked teeth and she would be a dead ringer.
Forget Dynasty. Is it just me, or is she channeling Sue Ellen Ewing from Dallas? A few crooked teeth and she would be a dead ringer.
Submitted by mathew on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:06pm.
They are beautiful, rich, successful and very altruistic at least by Hollywood standards. The constant envy directed towards them is understandable and I'm sure they could care less.
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Terri Ann ??
I like this dress and it definitely suits her. Sorry!
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:44pm.
I just thought I'd share some wonderful comments from the whack job loons over at Just Jared...
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I seriously would love to meet some of these people.
She looks like shit, as usual. I wonder when will she do something about her hair because it has looked TERRIBLE in the last couple of years. Looks like she just rolled out of bed with her shitty dress and shittier hair. The only thing that looks slightly better is her makeup.
And her pointy sharp jawbone matches her pointy sharp hips.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Let me guess. They call Jennifer "ticky" because her biological clock is ticking. Hilarious.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Albatross on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:54pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 2:44pm.
When did they start calling Aniston "Ticky"? I thought they always called her "X."
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They still call her X but I'm not sure when the Ticky started. I think it has something to do with pictures of a bloated faced JA and someone said she looked like a fattened tick or something like that and it took off from there for some of them.
Submitted by Albatross: "Holy Christ, that VEIN!"
You can see it in the thumbnails. When they're small! I thought it was a smudge because my toddler likes to write on the monitor, but nope, it was her VEIN, which shows up in a 1" x 1" thumbnail.
They probably can't remove it, because it has its own blood supply!
Submitted by Albatross: "Holy Christ, that VEIN!"
You can see it in the thumbnails. When they're small! I thought it was a smudge because my toddler likes to write on the monitor, but nope, it was her VEIN, which shows up in a 1" x 1" thumbnail.
They probably can't remove it, because it has its own blood supply!