Madge's Hard Candy Gym Opens In Mexico City
Madge just so happened to be in Mexico filling her face with FDA-banned fillers and stuffing boy toy huevos into her cheeks for winter, so she slid on over to Mexico City to cut the ribbon on her new Hard Candy gym! Wearing an ensemble directly from Dress Barn's Black Friday sidewalk sale, Madge's eyes filled with gold sparkly dollar signs as she welcomed all the suckers who are paying a one-time fee of $830 (that includes two months) and then $160 a month after that to work out under her roof. Si, $160 a month! All together now: SANTO DIOS!
With $830, do you know how many boxes of chicles I can buy from the local chirruns on the beach in Ensenada? Start my own chicles factory in Mehico or lift weights while Madge's music bashes into my ear hole? Hmmmmm. Anyperraloca, this is what Madge told reporters at the opening of her House of Hard Chocha:
“If any of you have seen my shows, you know that I don’t skimp on them and the same is true for the gym. We spend what it takes to make a globally first-class gym. Our plan is to use Mexico as a place to fine-tune our brand and then expand it to other countries and, in the long term, develop a global brand that includes the United States.”
I can't throw hate at Madge though. She is providing an important service. I'm sure there's hundreds of hos out there who want a pussy so strong that it could circumcise an uncut peen in one swipe. Serious Kabbalah kooch! And here's a few pictures of Madge teaching her customers that very trick.
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Mutton dressed as lamb with a side order of chicken cutlets.
Those cheek implants are the worst thing that she ever did to her face. I do not understand why she thinks that this looks good. She has terrible chipmunk cheeks and looks bloated. Then she has this weird masculine/muscley body with veins popping out everywhere. UGH. If she hadn't gotten the cheek implants or had them taken out then she would probably look somewhat normal.
In Mexico City?? Is she shacking up with drug lord?
She still has a tight bod
Julie Masking is opening a gym?
...wow...from certain angles, there's a real Baby Jane thing happening...
...the crazy eyes, garish make-up, and ratty hair really pull the whole look together...
...then again from other angles, there's a definite La Wildenstein thing happening....
...yikes...
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There's a whole lotta WTF going on. - But.Seriously.Folks
She should look as good as the beautiful tranny in thumbnail 9!
She's looking chubby, kind of bloated. And what was she thinking wearing that dress with those boots that show her thighs like that? The outfit makes her look dowdy and with that belt, shorter than she is. I'm sure that outfit cost thousands, but it looks like a buy at Walmarts (perhaps the Tonya Harding Collection).
Sad.
As someone who was in high school when Madge first hit the scene, watching her devolve into a creepy caricature of herself is so distressing. I hate, hate the face fillers...why can't she just look like herself (sort of) like Susan Sarandon? And the bright red lipstick, bleeding into the crevices...like a deranged society lady.
It makes me sad.
.
Her legs look like encased sausages. And then that face with those cheek-implants. Dreadful. In a few years she will look like that cat-lady.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
I pay $185/mo for Karate, but I get a skill out of it. Gyms are so BORING.
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On your marks, now ready set
Let's get loaded and forget
-Elvis Costello
The monthly fee is $160 dollars!! wtf..that shit better be 160 pesos in Mexico! http://youknowyoucare.com/?p=1629
www.youknowyoucare.com
It's almost surprising that Vadge's face hasn't started to get stretch marks.
In the main pic she's reminding me of one of those creepy puppets from Phil Collin's Land of Confusion"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvZkKK7KZ_o
OMG. She is starting to look like Hillary Clinton.
What the hell did she do to her face??? Someone please remind me later in life that it's better to look old than look like an old discarded Pinwheel puppet.
And yes, that is ridiculously expensive for a gym.
Wow, that is the poster child face for, "I feel that I look old, I'm trying to stop time with extensive plastic surgery, in my mind I now think I look youthful but in reality I look like all the 40+ actresses/singers in Hollywood that are also trying to stop time and denying that they've had work done"
Good luck in the US with that...
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Associated Press reports, the facility contains images of the pop diva, but the emphasis is on exercise, not celebrity worship.
“The facilities are not much different from any other high-class gym in Mexico City, and very little screams that this is Madonna's first fitness venture, apart from the name — the title of her last album — which she says in fitness parlance is the perfect combination of ‘hard body’ and ‘eye candy,’” reports NPR.
Madonna cut the ribbon to the gym and then taught a dance class for 20 selected members with music by DJ Paul Oakenfold. The gym is located in Mexico City’s upscale Bosques de las Lomas neighborhood. Membership costs about $160 per month after a joining fee of $830.
According to the AP, Madonna plans to open more gyms.
"Our plan is to use Mexico as a place to fine-tune our brand and then expand it to other countries and, in the long term, develop a global brand that includes the United States," she said last week.
she's smuggling some hard candy in her cheeks right there.
Also did Ellen PAge sue Vadge for appropriating her movie title yet? Hard candy was a pretty kick ass movie you guys.
She's definitely had her gap filled, fat injected into her hands and like someone mentioned earlier, a Pete burns jaw implants.
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"They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you." - Philip Larkin.
Is this like a Mexican Sport's Club LA? The PT must be outrageous...
$830? Then $160/mo thereafter? She's serious? Pulling that elitist bullshit in this economy? AND in Mexico? She doesn't know how to look at the reality that is surrounding her rich ass? What a bitch! I mean, she's alwasy been a bitch, but I just thought I would remind everyone.
Nothing is more important in this world than lookin' spiffy
OMG did Vadge have more fat injections to the face or are those baby Jesus' nuts being held tightly in her jaws???
She looks like an Alice in Wonderland character.
She looks terrible.
She would look so much better with the look she had around Express Yourself: classic blonde bob and chic cut suits. Oh yeah and her original heart shaped face.
she used to have a huge gap between her front ones, remember?
teeth, i mean.
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kiss my ass!
Jesus Vadge-how much do you get paid to haunt a house??
Her fucking cheeks are going to explode and that fucking red lipstick on those nasty teeth and WHY is her hair color always shit??
She could have a bitch on stand by to tweak that fucking brassy color everyday while shes going to tweak her crappy gym which the reason she opened in Mexico City first is when its a big ol flop then she hopes no one will notice.
Gain 15lbs and stop working out so much you fucking old piece of jerky cos right now you look like a semi preserved 70 year old.
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
Whoa! She looks like a freak! This leathery face, those bulbous cheeks, the ugly stuff she's wearing.....
First thought upon seeing the picture
"Why does Bugs Bunny have a blond wig on?"
Seriously.
What happened to her face?
I mean...Seriously???
This business plan has crash and burn written all over it.
Suffering tastes so very, very yummy.
MK, why don't you call her Vadge anymore!? Has she not worn enough bathing suit/body stockings, standing akimbo, with her ankles around the back of her head?
I think it's great that she never had her teeth done. I love real imperfect teeth. The chipmunk cheeks are another matter.
Submitted by Athina on Tue, 11/30/2010 - 11:45am.
Bah, exercise is a small part of the equation if your looking for a lean, ripped body. Any body- builder will tell you that nutrition is the bigger part of the equation.
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Untrue, working out can burn off all but the very worst of diets. People that eat right and excercise little just get skinny and flabby.
I think she thought looking like "charo" would appeal to them.
¡Qué pérdida de tiempo y dinero. ¡Qué gilipollas.
Submitted by MaxiePad on Tue, 11/30/2010 - 12:29pm.
Inequality is rampant there, and Madame, er, Madonna is simply catering to the lucky, snobby few:
"Me fui al gimnasio con la Madonna, pero ya está bien feíta, híjole!!!"
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"Ay, que oso, ¿no?"
Her face! And what is up with the chick in pigtails and fishnets? Who the hell exercises in shit like that?
I just noticed that she doesn't have those freaky lips every plastic ho in Hollywood have.
I guess she's not so stpid after all.
Yup, Mexico City is a booming Mecca for business, it's not one of the biggest cities in the world for nothing....there are some very rich folks in mexico city although they just keeping on the low. plus Mexicans dont believe in saving the like to spend, spend & spend!
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
stank: sigh I know, hey who is that in your avie?
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"I'M A VEGETARIAN. I DON'T INGEST SUFFERING"
Mexico, a 120M people country that ships about half of them north to clean toilets in the US, also features the richest man in the world. Inequality is rampant there, and Madame, er, Madonna is simply catering to the lucky, snobby few:
"Me fui al gimnasio con la Madonna, pero ya está bien feíta, híjole!!!"
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I was entirely unaware of how sucky it would get.
- Gautama.
Submitted by TequilaTax on Tue, 11/30/2010 - 11:14am.
Submitted by Happy Hour on Tue, 11/30/2010 - 10:54am.
Mexico City is the 8th richest city in the world... people will pay whatever for the latest and whatever it takes to get "it"
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Ah. I didn't know that. Then I guess this will actually work in Vagde's favor.
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Oh yeah.. she will do fine.. That place is already full.
She looks embalmed.
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Cause I can't work a job
Like any other slob
Punching in and punching out and sucking up to Bob
Marrying a bitch
Having seven kids
Giving up and growing old
And hoping there's a god
Madonna looks like she smells of mothballs and peroxide.
Vadge kind of looks like a really haggy version of Drew Barrymore (no offense to Drew who is naturally cute). Seriously, I will NOT get plastic surgery when I'm older if this is that best they can offer. I'd rather rock wrinkles than look freakish and foolish.
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West
Are you fucken serious. Who in Mexico can pay that for a gym. I go to a nice gym with all new gear for 800 a year and no joining fee.
Even if I would wanna look like her with her bulging thighs and sinewy arms,I sure as hell, wouldn't pay $830 to join a fecking gym. Mexico City seems like an odd place to open a high end gym.
DAYUM SNOW PIECE YOU IS KILLIN' ME WIT YO MAXIM PICS! Now I have to go scurry behind a corner and play wit myself. Be back in an hour or two.
Bah, exercise is a small part of the equation if your looking for a lean, ripped body. Any body- builder will tell you that nutrition is the bigger part of the equation. Madonna works out a lot, but it's her very restrictive diet that keeps her thin. I would imagine she could make a shit load more money if she published her eating plan along with a cookbook.