Thursday, November 18th 2010
The Photoshop Awards: The Kennedys Poster
More like Jackie Ohwhatdidtheydotoyourface. The words on the poster says this is Katie Holmes, Greg Kinnear, Barry Pepper and Tom Wilkinson, but if you told me this was a DIY Mona Lisa, JFK (Greg Kinnear really does look like JFK here), a second-tier Roger Maris impersonator and the late Tom Bosley, I'd believe you!
I mean, if you sat in a Scientology sauna until a dozen L. Ron Hubbards and Xenus waltzed before your very eyes and somebody showed you this poster, it still wouldn't look like Stepford Katie. She looks like a Jackie O wax figure made with birthday candles and black marbles that was...well.....that was left in the Scientology sauna for too long.
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Funny you should mention Scientologists, because remember what film Barry Pepper starred in? Battlefield Earth. Who knew he was still in good standing with the cult even after that steaming turd. Not that the fault was his, at least, not entirely: John Travolta carries at least 70% of the blame for BE and he's still invited for the Scientology Celebrity Center Annual Sauna-o-rama every year.
Fuck that. That's Tina Fey.
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I'm gonna hit you in the fuckin' face with a FULL wine bottle. CORK. AND. ALL!!!
Slow clap.
On other fronts, I have on my local classical music station, and unless I am mistaken, they are playing a Danny Elfman tune from some movie. Awesome!
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 9:31pm.
I can not wait to avoid seeing this.
Barry Pepper is who? RFK? I'm not sure if that would work. *skeptical*
Am I the only who thinks the pic is NOT photoshoped and thats how her face really looks?
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
I saw pictures of Katie while they were filming where she looked more like Jackie O. than she does on that poster.
Goddamn, Kate!
They won't even Photoshop her ass right!
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i love the miniseries format. needs to be used more in my opinion. i love barry pepper too. since i don't have cable, i will be waiting to netflix this, if it's any good.
I can just imagine all the heavy sex scenes that will be in this movie being that the Kennedy men were such whores.
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"If a lady treats other people as she'd like to be treated, she's allowed to roll in the grass if she wants to ..."
Lena Horne
Poor Katiebot can't act her way out of a paperbag. She really should bake tommygirl a big pink cake for blowing the producers of this to get her the part.
It looks like the Photoshop guy was a little heavy-handed with the "prostitution whorah" tool... She looks like Danielle Staub.
There are no decent young actresses today so I guess they chose KH based on how much TommyGirl paid the studio to put her in...but Good Lord...she is terrible...I mean Jackie O is not a tough part but it does require charisma and mystery....both traits are suited for TommyGirl but not StepMom.
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 6:19pm.
How bout Teddy Roosevelt? He had a big dramatic life both in and out of the Oval Office, and he even has the underdog quality because he was sickly as a kid.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
She kind of resembles a grandmother mixed with Steve Urkel here. lol
This is why when I watch TV, I end up watching Forensic Files and "When Animals Attack". This miniseries looks stupid and boring.
I can not wait to avoid seeing this.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
So, if Katie Holmes' grandma gear didn't age her enough, she can also thank Photoshop because here she looks about 20 years her senior.
She used to be stylish. The marriage sucked all of the youth out of her.
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"the bonus round being... a landmine field... and Ted Nugent has to be screaming 'Wango Tango!' in their ear over and over... as he joins them through the field"
-EveryStrangersEyes
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Ghastly.
Are you SURE that's not David Schwimmer on the left?
Submitted by ScarfnBarf on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 6:58pm.
WALL EYES, ONE OF WHICH IS GLASS?????
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I think I peed myself a little...Ok, a lot...can someone get me and abundantly absorbant material up in here STAT? You don't want the smell of tiger piss permeating...Trust....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
You know who did the best JFK ever? Patrick Dempsey is "JFK: Reckless Youth." I have it on dvd, and since he's from Maine, he had the Bahston accent down pat.
My god, I despise this fat freak with the motor skills of a hooved animal. ~~ eat.pray.vomit
I think I would rather attend a vomit festival then to see this movie. And really, haven't the Kennedys been done enough?
The casting is...interesting. TW as Joe-- got that. Good choice. GK as JFK? I'll reserve judgment. BP as Bobby? Ummm...no. The look is all wrong. KBot as Jackie? all kinds of HELL NAWL. When will Hollywood realize that she sucks as an actress? Wonder how much Tommy girl paid the producers to give her that role.
My god, I despise this fat freak with the motor skills of a hooved animal. ~~ eat.pray.vomit
Oh boy. When Suri sees this not-approved-by-hers-truly poster, she is gonna FLIP OUT. There will be blood.
Katiebot is channeling some serious Joanne Whalley Kilmer here.
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I'd like to flay you with my rapier wit, but I'm afraid it's about as dull as fucking your mother.
Ich bin ein berliner!!!
So not watching this hot mess of puke.
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"You're disssthphicable!!!!!"
She looks nothing like Jackie. "Kate" looks like herself, but with a harelip and walleyes, one of which is glass. Scientology will do that to ya.
I think Katie can pull of that weird montone voice of Jackie O's. A little extra xanax barley water will smooth it perfectly. Kinnear is a pretty good actor.
It's weird, because in the photos of Katie on set, she is passable, but they've Photoshopped her to the point of looking like ET's grandmama here.
Was Joel Surnow (who directed this piece of caca) with Rush Limbaugh on his Dominican vacay (buying up the island's share of prostitutes)?
I don't like the idea of Katie as Jackie, but everyone else is a good choice. Good actors.
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Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-Albert Einstein
I'll mute it, and watch just for the clothes...
maybe I'll unmute for Greg, for some reason I like him.
How many times and how many different ways are they going to make movies about this corrupt family? Jesus Christ let it go already. Is there any other presidential family they can make a movie about?
WTF???????
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"Money is the magic wand that turns a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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Barry Pepper is one hot mofo.
So is Greg Kinnear. I would totally allow back episodes of Talk Soup play on TV while and we make out on a bed of red rose petals.
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"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.
I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."
Eh, I'll watch it. It'll be better than what is on tv these days. Reality, reality and more reality. At least I can make fun of the people in it, like I did when Armand Assante and Jaqueline Bisset were in that Napoleon mini-series years ago. I was a kid, but I remember my mom and grandmother screaming at the tv after Napoleon lit a fire with a Bic lighter and then said " I gotta go!" Even as a stupid child I remember thinking, "I don't think this is what really went on"
They photoshopped her eyes up tooooo big. Oh fuck, I don't care.... I won't be watching anywaze.
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It sounds like I'll need to be drunk, stoned and suffering from a minor concussion to deal with this fuckery. MK - November 2008
I have always thought Kinnear was really cute and he does look like JFK. Katie is fine as Jackie, actually they are alot alike, meaning they are both attractive but at the same time very ordinary. They even have the same little tiny teeth.
Katie does have GIANT ankles and I don't think she is a good enough actress to pull of the arrogance of Jackie O
.....and here's another movie/mini series I won't watch....
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Just wait til your ball sack is jangling around your knees like santa's bells and your brows are meeting your eyelids -stolen from: Urfugginjokin on Holy Moly on 10/13/10
wow, Greg really does look like JFK. A lot.
katie, meh, who cares,other than her beard.
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You smell like cheap weed and applesauce.
The History Channel is about as aptly named as The Learning Channel.
Enough with the movies about this family. They are a bunch of corrupt, drunk whores in politics who get away with murder.
I do enjoy these lengthy mini-series and I adore Wilkinson so have hopes for this particular one. I am hoping Katie can pull it off, seems like a challenging pursuit if anything.
I don't care if she looks EXACTLY like Jackie or not.
this is going to be a WRECK!
Maybe this will comfort Katie...
"Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes." Jackie Kennedy
Jaclyn Smith and Jacqueline Bisset are the only 2 people I have seen pull off all the Jackie mannerisms and voice successfully...even though both are far more beautiful than the real Jackie ever was. I am curious to see what Katie will do.
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"It's pathetic how far a gal has to go for a good fuck" - Samantha Jones
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Submitted by SpiceDong on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 5:09pm.
Submitted by Happy Hour on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 5:07pm.
8 part movie EIGHT??
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Don't fret.
It's just a miniseries for History Channel. They are just trying to sell it like a real movie event. That's all.
Oh ok... that makes more sense.
Submitted by like-wow on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 5:09pm.
Actually Katie makes a pretty good Jackie O. At least they don't let that slutty Scarjo portray her.
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Okay, I agree that ScarJo would have been way worse....
Stepford Katie doesn't look a thing like Jackie. Wtf? So many other better choices. Shit, I would have accepted Jennifer Coolidge in a brown bob wig before Katie.
Submitted by Happy Hour on Thu, 11/18/2010 - 5:07pm.
8 part movie EIGHT??
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Don't fret.
It's just a miniseries for History Channel. They are just trying to sell it like a real movie event. That's all.
"It's pathetic how far a gal has to go for a good fuck" - Samantha Jones
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Actually Katie makes a pretty good Jackie O. At least they don't let that slutty Scarjo portray her.