Howard K. Stern Is Going To Jail (No, He's Not)!
And you're all probably making the same "not this shit again" face as old girl in the back after reading Howard K. Stern's name. Three years after Anna Nicole Smith went off to heaven where every angel is a sugar daddy, her former life stalker and bad shit supplier Howard K. Stern was found guilty of two counts of conspiracy for delivering pills to her on a silver platter even though he knew she was an addict. The jury did acquit his ass of 7 other felony charges.
One of Anna Nicole's doctors, Khristine Eroshevich was also convicted of four charges, but her other doctor Sandeep Kapoor got a not guilty stamped on all of his charges and he's free to go.
The D.A. says that Howard K. and Khristine both face up to 3 years of scrubbing their assholes with government soap in prison. But a legal expert type tells E! Online that there's no way Howard K. Stern will face the booty bandits in prison. They say he will get probation since he's got a clean record. Sentencing has been scheduled for January 6th.
And in the dusty community center of a mobile home park somewhere, Cousin Shelly, Sugar Pie and Kimmie are all toasting to this news with Dixie cups filled with Cisco and Hill Country soda! Happy America (copyright: Mama Lynn)!