"Ding! I Made A Thought!"
Or maybe she just made a fart. The look is the same. Anyways, here's Jessica Simpson promoting her line of stuff and signing autographs at Macy's in NYC last night. While Chestica made that money, her leased piece Eric Johnson held her purse on the side and got lost in his own head thinking about all the purdy shiny things his sugar mama is going to buy him for his birthday.
Yeah, it was his birthday yesterday and I'm sure dude was like one of those brats who was more focused on tearing the wrapping paper off all his gifts than eating a piece of cake (Jessica has finally found her dream man). I was never one of those brats, surprisingly. I cared more about getting a piece of sheet cake from Gemco with a frosting rose on it. We used to tear each other's hair out for a frosting rose. That was special shit.
Here's more of Jessica NOT looking like the MVP of the National Drag Queen Football League while taking her bitch out last night. Spanx it till it fits!
• 
You know what, Centy? Maybe I put my foot in my mouth with the insurance thing, and my intentions weren't to lie, but that I just simply don't know why we aren't getting her treatment. I DON'T KNOW WHY WE HAVEN'T TAKEN ANY OF OUR PETS TO THE VET. I agree that we should go anyway. I admit it, I don't know.
I figured that assuming it was an insurance issue, it would've looked better than owning up to it, but I guess I learned my lesson. I don't know why. You've caught me, I don't fucking know why, okay?!
I do care about my animals. I live in a household that adores animals, and I'm sorry I can't convince you that I mean well.
And obviously if I took the year off from school, my parents would've known anyway provided that's my permanent residence. I was scared to let them know I was fighting depression, but hell, I'm still depressed and I think they're at least somewhat aware of it now. But yes, I did take the year off because of depression and now I'm trying to redeem myself and get back on track, like I said, HOWEVER NECESSARY.
What trap would I be setting? Honestly, what would I get out of manipulating someone over the internet?
As for "editing" posts on here to make myself sound better, I don't need to. You can believe whatever you want, but I don't really get where I'm being so inconsistent. I already admitted I really don't know why we stalled on taking the animals to the vet and that I just didn't want to own up to it, and I really think that's the only thing I've ever said on here that wasn't 100% true.
To be honest here, Centy, I'm pretty ashamed of many aspects of myself. If I really wanted to save face, I wouldn't have ever broadcasted on this site that I'm a lonely, fat, virgin who can deflate a fucking erection from a mile away, with emotional problems, few friends, and hates her job.
What am I protecting?
I'm a little bit disappointed because I did like you, and I'm a tad perturbed by the fact that you've witnessed a turn in my behavior on here I'm entirely unaware of, or I seem dishonest to you, but there's just no fucking point. Sorry I can't make you believe me that I didn't make it up to hurt anyone else, but because I've been ashamed of not knowing.
You fucking win.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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My parents are the ones who legally own all of our pets. By "my" dog, I mean that I consider her part of the family, and right now, things are tough all around. Everyone's trying to work out the insurance ordeal. Right now, I don't even know about my own situation when it comes to health insurance.
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"Everyone's trying to work out the insurance ordeal."
You can't get insurance on a pet if it's already sick.
Why would you mention pet insurance if you didn't have it?
I volunteer at an animal shelter, I know this for a fact.
Support your own words, and I will retract.
You are the twister, not I.
I have a photographic memory and I remember that you had dropped out of school and were terrified your parents would find out about it, because you were so completely depressed.
I spent alot of time counseling you, now I realize that may have been a trap, but if not I don't regret it.
Your stories don't add up.
Sorry.
Btw, if you ever get fired from McDonald's you should work at a bait shop.
You're not that good, but you're not bad!
Like I said, can't wait for that Mac.
PS --Anyone can edit new stuff and old stuff here, so don't bother trying to support whatever you've said in the past. You're a new person now, and if that is really and totally true, good luck to you. I always say, even if people want to do me wrong, I always hope that they are not truly cruel people inside themselves and will find more fulfilling pursuits.
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
EPIC FAIL!
Because this trick is a Texan, and looking hot 24/7 is a must-have for a society ho and she is not helping her cause flashing those pork sausage arms in a dress that cutting off her circulation.
Yeah, she needs to get her asses to the gym and work it out!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
Submitted by Centaurious on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 2:11am.
I said, they DON'T have vet insurance, but still, that isn't their fault. Like I said, money's tight right now.
I suppose I shouldn't buy any new clothing or underwear from what's left of my own paycheck AFTER paying my student loans. On the other hand, I've been saving a lot of that "disposable income" to pay tuition and help my family members. O noes, I went to the mall and bought new clothes this summer! How greedy!
By the way, you may have not gotten the memo, but I'm back in school and haven't skipped any classes. Sure, it's community college for the time being, but I'm taking whatever steps necessary to get back in order. Moreover, I believe that before you turned against me I told you I was only working at McDonald's TO GET BACK INTO SCHOOL, NOT AVOID IT.
You sure have a way of twisting other people's words.
And if by that last statement I've ever mistreated you, bullfuckingshit. I've been nothing but kind to you up until you decided that you were going to stir a bunch of shit with me a few days ago. One thing I've NEVER been was unkind to anyone who didn't provoke or insult me in some way.
Again, what's the fucking problem? You stopped talking to me and then one day just began to pick on me, out of nowhere.
So, whatever.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Khensu seems to be pretty pissed at someone, maybe at herself, but Khensu, if you fax me your Great Dane's vet bill I might be willing to pay it.
People with vet insurance have disposable income.
People who order VS underwear, whether mommy or daughter have disposable income.
People who send their daughters to college, even if they skip classes and choose to work at McDonald's and are so super scared of their managers even though they are Medusas with their bitch faces in some other life have disposable income and are perhaps ungrateful and entitled.
If you are telling me your parents, the owners of your dogs pay for dog insurance and not insurance for their own daughter, well, I have a bridge I want to sell you!
Again, fax me that bill for your dog's illness.
I hate to see a dog suffer.
Now, humans, depending on their treatment of me, that's another story! :)
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
I think she is pretty. but she does have a masculine jaw, and her nose has a strange shape when she is facing straight forward. I like the profile of her nose though.
Her face shape made her look like a drag queen from the nose down when she was at her thinnest, especially when she got those lip injections.
Her new clothing line at Macy's looked decent IMO when I saw it a few weeks ago.
What's your problem all of the sudden?
I don't recall ever being bitchy toward you or anything, and now you're handing me all of this hostility.
What's the deal?
My parents are the ones who legally own all of our pets. By "my" dog, I mean that I consider her part of the family, and right now, things are tough all around. Everyone's trying to work out the insurance ordeal. Right now, I don't even know about my own situation when it comes to health insurance.
Second of all, I haven't been underwear shopping in months, before my dog was getting sick, so a few months ago, the dog's health issues weren't even part of the question as she was well until recently.
I've been alienated by enough people in the last six months of my life, so I'm pretty used to being tossed on the backburners, though. So, whatever.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 1:25am.
Oh, but that doesn't negate my strong fondness of pretty underwear. I'm quite "girlie" in that aspect, that I really like underwear shopping.
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So...you're willing to blow money on sexy undies but you don't have the money to take your sick Great Dane to the vet.
It's your life, but your priorites are interesting, to say the very least.
I'm buying a new computer next month, a Mac. I've always loved them, and I've been saving up.
Hopefully when the new Mac arrives, my life will be alot easier. I'll change everything, new computer, new email addresses!
Registered under a different name, etc.
Since my identity was stolen a few months ago and my bank account hacked, I've been advised on a number of different issues.
This will stop.
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
Oh, but that doesn't negate my strong fondness of pretty underwear. I'm quite "girlie" in that aspect, that I really like underwear shopping.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 1:11am.
Submitted by Centaurious on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 12:54am.
Eh, I'll flip through anything if it has pages. My mother gets it in the mail.
Sometimes they're alright. I've seen cute shoes in there before, but I like the lingerie mostly. If I had a reason to wear any of it, I'd be ordering a lot.
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Ummm..your mom wears VS...well, ok.
More power to her.
That explains alot. :)
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
Submitted by Centaurious on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 12:54am.
Eh, I'll flip through anything if it has pages. My mother gets it in the mail.
Sometimes they're alright. I've seen cute shoes in there before, but I like the lingerie mostly. If I had a reason to wear any of it, I'd be ordering a lot.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 12:49am.
I can't really decide whether I think she's pretty or not.
Sometimes I think she looks pretty good (she needs more makeup though), and other times I just think she looks a little masculine in the face.
I think she should just give up on music and keep making shoes. Her line appears to be successful. It's positive for your business if they're selling your items in Victoria's Secret, isn't it?
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This is not an insult, btw, but I have a hard time imagining that you know anything about Victorias Secret and who sells there, Khensu!
I mean, wouldn't that seriously fuck up your street cred? :)
Edit for PS -- Simply meaning that you would have to visit the VS websit or get the catalogue to know her shoes were there. If you get the catalogue, that means you have purchased something from VS! You can't say you have wandered into a VS store in the mall on the way to Hot Topic, because the shoes are not in the store. I have outed you as a girly-girl who loves sexy lingerie, Khensu. Welcome to the VS club!
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
Submitted by Uptown James on Fri, 09/17/2010 - 12:36am.
Sometimes she looks like a mouth-breather.
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Well, considering she never brushes her teef, I hope we're both downwind.
I have Klonopin, no Propoful, unfortunately! :)
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
I can't really decide whether I think she's pretty or not.
Sometimes I think she looks pretty good (she needs more makeup though), and other times I just think she looks a little masculine in the face.
I think she should just give up on music and keep making shoes. Her line appears to be successful. It's positive for your business if they're selling your items in Victoria's Secret, isn't it?
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Sometimes she looks like a mouth-breather.
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"I'll trade you a Klonopin for some Propofol"
Her shoes are great!
I'm wearing a pair of her black suede flats right now.
She seems like a sweet girl, though I remember five years ago I thought she was smokin' hot and now I think she just looks very average and MUCH older.
That's quite a change for just 5 years.
Keep pumpin' out them clodhoppers Jess!
It may be your only hope....
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“Four be the things I'd be better without; love, curiousity, freckles and doubt.”
I really hate to admit it because I detest her songs, but some of the shoes in her fashion line are pretty cute.
As for weight gain, when short people gain weight, it always appears more than it really is, especially if you're top heavy.
I'm top heavy and hate it. I'm ridiculous when I put on weight (like right now) because it all goes to my head, arms, back, and gut rather than just going everywhere.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Creepy, fat, lonely, and bitter since 2008.
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Was it just the beauty, that all youth possess, that made her the gorgeous sister when she first came on the scene? Because DAyum she is not aging well. Bitch is looking just average!
I feel her pain of having a fat, stubby neck as I too am afflected with the same fat, stubby neck sydrome when I put on weight.
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"So what was all that about enlarged holes and tight cracks?" -Enid
ubmitted by catholicschoolgirl on Thu, 09/16/2010 - 11:07pm.
Fat, drunk and stupid are no way to go through life...Dean Wormer
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Lighten up,Frances. She looks CUTE. Someone who cares picked that outfit, and as long as she does not destroy another iconic 60's song, she's harmless.
Fat, drunk and stupid are no way to go through life...Dean Wormer
_______________________________
I smell bananas! Am I back? what's in my ass?
Chirio 8/8/10
She makes me feel sorry for her. She's so desperate. Damn daddy issues.
Although she has the look of the half-wit in the banner pic, I can't help but wish her and her boy-toy all the best!
Chub nugget.
I don't really hate her nor does she annoy me like a Whoredashian does, so I really have no reason to make fun of her. At least she could sing.
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
Something about her reminds me of Blair Warner.
Since Nick, she seems to draw a lot of these nogoodnik types. As a result, photos of her with her latest boyfriend(s) always make me anxious, like the other Jessica Simpson-brand shoe is just waiting to drop.
BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S BOYCOTT MACY'S
they insult all of us by paying this braindead, attention-starved, lardassed skeez and prolonging her already too long turn on our national stage
Still better than her sister!
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"Leavin', on a southern train
Only yesterday, you lied
Promises of what I seemed to be
Only watch the time go by
All of these things you said to me"
Submitted by LaChaylo on Thu, 09/16/2010 - 11:32am.
Poor dumbfuck, she tries with that scary ass smile of hers and rent-a-douche.
LOL!
**********
"All the girls in the club wanna know
Where did all their pretty boys go?"
...I love this goofy bitch. I cannot help myself.
If I ever seek that counseling I need, I will be sure to work on it.
**I ALT 12 you!**
Submitted by loozer on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 9:05pm.
UrMomma!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyngFurWy14
Looks like she finally got a new stylist! I like her so much better now. Because I'm shallow like that.
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You never know when a pap is going to take your picture. And you never know when a blogger wearing stained sweat shorts is going to post said picture.
-MK
I would be willing to bet that she is exhasusted at night after trying to suck that fat fucking belly in all day!
There are some people who look okay with weight. But Jessica was obviously meant to be skinny. She looks so bad!
How many fucking pairs of Spanx did it take to get her into that sausage casing?
This is the first time I've really gotten the ghey vibe off her new piece. He definitely Febreezes her nethers while he's on the clock.
You make me hate my hips! I hate my hips!
Her body is looking an little "Snookie-esque".
Where is that Torso she used to have. I guess big boy has been hitting it to hard, he is starting to condense her.
-"Well, should we get more coffee or get two guns and shoot ourselves?"
She looks like shit.
If she was a normal everyday person, she looks okay.
But this idiot is fucking rich and has all the money to hire a stylist, personal chef and personal trainer.
Just shows how stupid she is. I would love to have that kind of money....working out everyday and looking gorgeous.
I would roll this bitch for her jewelry.
Other than that, she doesn't bug me.
*******"Curtsy motherfuckers!" - Michael K. 04/30/10*******************
she looks happy and i think she looks good...no shade from me about jessica today...
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don't slap me cuz i'm not in the mood....
She looks good. She's not chunky and she's not too thin. The only thing I don't like is her tired ass makeup. Spice it up a bit, do something different. She reminds me of Mariah who hasn't changed her blush or lipstick in 10 years.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
Submitted by MyFingersHurt on Thu, 09/16/2010 - 1:20pm.
Funniest post title ever!
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Agreed!
♥ Threadkilla!
Hey Cee Lo. There are two sides to every story:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1940830
It's no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society. ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti
Submitted by christine the hoff on Thu, 09/16/2010 - 12:41pm.
Chunky little housewife out shopping while the brats are in school.....
****
FUCK YOU, CATBOX!!!
:p
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I ALMOST threw up my grilled cheese sandwich but with Jesus in your life, you can overcome anything. - boobxqueen on Octomom's Star cover
Poor Jessica. What is she going to do when it is not cool to be an airhead approaching middle age?
when she is my age she's going to look like Shelley Winters
she must have read our comments from the other day,,good improvement,,,
Funniest post title ever!
spanx spanx spanx! (she needs to get her little sister some weight gain tips)
Ha ha, she is so turning in to a typical obese Texas buffet stalker.
MUCH better. She must have apologized to her gay.
She's looking better in these pics. When you're a shorty, even 5 lbs. makes a diff if it goes right to your stomach. So so glad to see her leaving the mini mumu behind, howevs.
Time to get back in the gym Jess.(I'd still smash.)
She belongs in the "Hello, I'm An Idiot" Hall of Fame.
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I never said that it was your fault.
I said that I was going to blame you.
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