Bachelor Jake & Vienna Sausage Broke Up
Another relationship that was born in ABC's bowels and pushed out of their asshole has been flushed down the toilet for good. Since the love affair I'm about to start with this Pop Tart sitting next to me will last longer than most Bachelor relationships, this is the direct opposite of surprising. But since pretending is fun, add another drop of butter to your cream cheese bagel (I know how you do) and just tell yourself you're drowning your sorrows in melted fat. I mean, you might as well get something out of this shit.
People confirms that Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi of the most recent season of The Bachelor have quit each other. A spokeswhore didn't give a reason for the break up, but they said this: “Jake and Vienna have split. They appreciate the respect for their privacy at this time.”
When Jake got on one knee and proposed to Vienna Sausage during the season finale of The Bachelor, I punched myself in the face for actually watching that fake shit. And then I figured it would only be a matter of seconds before Vienna Sausage was pawning that ring off in a shop off the highway in Florida somewhere so that she could use the cash to pay for her third nose rotation. While I do think it's a good idea that she sell that shit right away, bitch needs to use that money to fix her jacked-up wonk eyes instead of getting more plastic surgery.
Seriously, the Haylie Duff of Florida looks like an alley mutt with two little hot dogs dangling before her. One eye is trying to focus on the hot dog on the right, and the other is trying to eat up the one on the left. No wonder these two lasted as long as they did. Vienna couldn't clearly see him checking out other pieces of ass.
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shoulda proposed to Tenley, but whatever, my mind just hurts watching Kasey on The Bachelorette
He isnt amazingly hot or anything, but he is still way too good looking for her...She is funny looking & not in an interesting/good way. She is boring ugly looking.
Are any of these fake relationships still on? Except for Trista and Ryan?
Submitted by dusted on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 2:35pm.
No I'm totally agreeing with you. I mean look at her nose--it's half the size of her face. She's like the elephant man or something. I wish we weren't in this damn PC society because then we could put her in a sideshow like we used to with freaks like her.
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LOL, ok literally you made me laugh today which is a good thing. dusted, you are my new bestest dlisted friend :) And I cosign with the above....
God is never the one.- MK
Look Tom and Katie, I'm really proud of you and Imma let you finish, but Jake and Vienna was the fakest couple of all time. All time!
two famewhores break up. I'm shocked. SHOCKED!
Submitted by harveyprice on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 12:00pm.
Ummm, no, that's not what I meant, but thanks for playing. I'm just talking about regular size noses, not like Housewives noses or Michael Jackson noses...sounds like you're a little sensitive about big noses?
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No I'm totally agreeing with you. I mean look at her nose--it's half the size of her face. She's like the elephant man or something. I wish we weren't in this damn PC society because then we could put her in a sideshow like we used to with freaks like her.
He really came off as a sweet guy on Dancing with the Has-Beens. Plus, he is hot and the fact that he is a pilot makes him hotter. She, on the other hand, is fugly. But, c'mon, how realistic are these dumb tv relationships anyway?
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Don't hate me cause I'm DLeautiful
Anyone else think they look related? In this picture their noses look exactly the same to me. Weird.
That one needs to join SJP and her doppelgaenger Hailey Duff in the stable.
Toss this ho an apple, cuz she is Kentucky Derby material!
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Goddamn!!! She is FUG!!
My eyes cross just looking at her and her wonky eyes - must look away....
15 minutes expired, now please go away!!!!
Ahahaha third nose rotation! I love it when MK is on fi-yah!
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"Regular people pay for birthday cakes, you idiotic pig with the self-entitlement of a billion Kanyes." -MK
but this is the after a nose job look?
Submitted by dusted on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 11:42am.
I know, right? It's like, what are they doing with women who haven't gotten nose jobs? Are they retarded or something? Why would you accept someone or be attracted to someone who doesn't look like they were made from a cookie cutter? It's so wrong!
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Ummm, no, that's not what I meant, but thanks for playing. I'm just talking about regular size noses, not like Housewives noses or Michael Jackson noses...sounds like you're a little sensitive about big noses?
God is never the one.- MK
It looks like he's helping a "special" girl across the street.
I've never seen their show, but these two look like brother and sister. It was for the best that they move on.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
Submitted by harveyprice on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 9:10am.What is with dudes and dating/marrying chicks with huge ass noses? I swear to god, it's like men cannot see huge ass ugly noses unless they're gay.
I know, right? It's like, what are they doing with women who haven't gotten nose jobs? Are they retarded or something? Why would you accept someone or be attracted to someone who doesn't look like they were made from a cookie cutter? It's so wrong!
i.am.crushed
Submitted by yoboo on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 11:03am.
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I agree... call me vain but I miss beautiful people on my tv screen and internet entertainment.
Heartbreaking...
...NOT.
where did she have plastic surgery, where? and why is he always carrying her? He is such a schmuck.. (now off to see what her other competitors looked like!)
I cannot believe this shit is STILL on TV and obviously people are watching it?!
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She's really fucking ugly. I'm sick of looking at busted "reality" faces.
I remember back when I was young, when the first few seasons of MTV's real world were a hit. I thought it might be a cool experience to be on a reality TV show someday.
Fucktards like these two (among others) have ruined Realty TV forever.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 10:46am.
Submitted by Pamela on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 10:41am.
My eyes can't stop rolling. *slaps self in head*
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LMFAO!
~~Submitted by No Words on Tue, 05/25/2010 - 10:06pm.
People are tired of this shit night after night...we come here to escape from the minutiae of our daily lives...if I wanted to hear crazy people spout insanity, I would call my mother-
Submitted by Pamela on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 10:41am.
My eyes can't stop rolling. *slaps self in head*
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 06/22/2010 - 10:37am.
WoW *eyeroll* I'm really *eyeroll* upset *eyeroll*
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LMFAO!! Ok I get your upset! Try to pull it togeather!!!
~~Submitted by No Words on Tue, 05/25/2010 - 10:06pm.
People are tired of this shit night after night...we come here to escape from the minutiae of our daily lives...if I wanted to hear crazy people spout insanity, I would call my mother-
WoW *eyeroll* I'm really *eyeroll* upset *eyeroll*
What is a gorgeous homosexual like Jake doing with that ugly fish?
The many faces/looks of Vienna.
http://starcasm.net/archives/30730
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
I am so not surprised on this. So, does Vienna now live in CA? She's looking for someone who has lots of money, I do recall her bio on the Bachelor and her dad talking about how no one is basically good enough for her. Whatever.
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
From that picture, her nose doesn't look big/ugly to me. Her awful hair is distracting though. Brassy Lohan blonde.
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
and in who gives a flying fluckity flucks news
~~Submitted by No Words on Tue, 05/25/2010 - 10:06pm.
People are tired of this shit night after night...we come here to escape from the minutiae of our daily lives...if I wanted to hear crazy people spout insanity, I would call my mother-
I bet he was cheating on Sausage Face with the Dancing With the Stars chick he was partnered with.
What is with dudes and dating/marrying chicks with huge ass noses? I swear to god, it's like men cannot see huge ass ugly noses unless they're gay.
And MK, you really are a funny motherfucker, i.e. "And then I figured it would only be a matter of seconds before Vienna Sausage was pawning that ring off in a shop off the highway in Florida somewhere so that she could use the cash to pay for her third nose rotation."
God is never the one.- MK
Sausage breath was way more manly than Jakeepoo....He totally flamed out on DWThas-beens and bitch even shed tears...the horror/whore!
Jake wanted to touch down on a less wonky landing strip. *********************************************************************************************** Love me some chicken! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhcOWmjSBlg
fakeness is right!
who buys into this crap anyway.
wHO KNEW? Does anyone know if they airlifted the other gay faced guy off the volcano yet?
"motherfucker, I lick pits for a living" Sucky 12/14/2009
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever
LawDog 04/15/2010 Who DOESN'T enjoy a gang bang? WTF
But they were the next Newman and Woodward! Oh my faith in love is crushed. *runs off crying*
I'm shocked. SHOCKED I tell you. About as shocked as I was when Lindsay's scram went off.
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*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
shocking. truly.
trista & ryan are the only ones that seem to have made it.
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People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because
it's safer to pick on rich women than motorcycle gangs.
"Respect their privacy",,,,,projectile voms.
LOL @ the tag Your Face Scares Me.
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I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell...
When the only thing you have in common is over-bleached teeth and a tan, you can only expect so much.
Okay so throughout all of this, these two have been craving the spotlight and doing whatever they could to stay "relevant" yet now they ask for privacy? Um, did anyone care about these two humps in the first place?
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I'm a winner. I'm a sinner. Do you want my autograph?
http://www.modestneeds.org/
QUELLE SURPRISE! Also her face sux.
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
I am shocked (spoken in a dead monotone)
Wow! Two people who became engaged on a reality show didn't actually make it?