Too Much Sexual Napalm For John Mayer To Handle
Coochella (on purpose typo) Music Festival started up yesterday, which means dozens of famewhores descended upon Indio, CA to drink the sweet nectar out of plastic cups and add to their sand crab collection (see Wonky). John Mayer also momentarily left his Summer's Eve box to go to Coochella, and here he is giving the sex eye to a goddess (You're getting Ricki Lake in Hairspray vibes, right?) who is light years away from his league.
John's David Duke penis needs to go to a Klan rally or something, and leave this fine young thing alone if he knows what's good for him. Fuck Sexual Napalm. Bitch could make John's dick go boom just by licking her lips. John probably already has the Chernobyl of crotches, but this woman will leave him completely destroyed. It's best he back away and play with girls his own speed.
Anways, here's more hos frolicking on the grounds of Coochella including: Kelly Osbourne, Basement Baby, Katy Perry, Scott Speedman, Rotten Peaches with Eli Roth, Wonks, and DANNY DEVITO (I'm not trying to see his CROCS)!!!!
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And actually John Mayer is hella talented (seriously!) but he just disgusts me with his ho ways (and that's saying a lot, because I will pretty much get on any peen in a 10 mile radius of where i'm at).
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"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
Submitted by The Mad Catter on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 2:04pm.
I don't think even Russell Brand is enough of a douchebag for Katie Perry. She and Mayer are fucking MADE for each other. They should go away together on a rocket to a faraway planet in a fucking different UNIVERSE and start colonizing it with retardo-douche babies.
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Excellent idea! Except they should both be spayed....No planet deserves to have their offspring on it.
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"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
I love this hot slut! She is totally giving him a look like, "John Mayer, SIT DOWN". She's mean mugging for the camera and couldn't care less about the douchey ho next to her. I LOVE when regular people could give a fuck about celebs.
I nominate her for HSOD!
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"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
That picture shouldve been a Caption That contest
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
That is Demi Moore in a fat suit.
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"This smacks of a big gay coverup!"
Oprah & Gayle & Tyler Perry
Submitted by fez on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 10:24pm.
and Paris' transformation into Tammy Faye Baker is almost complete except her heart is still too small...
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*snorts*
Tis very funny, but, insults Tammy Faye ... I kinda liked that old woman. Paris, on the other hand, has a tiny black coal for a heart (remember all the good things she was gonna do when she got out of jail?) and a pea for a brain. And yet, she lives.
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"I'm sorry you feel that way ..... may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits"
LORD HELP ME BUT OK I THINK PEECHESSE AND ELAAAAAAAAAAAY LOOK GOOD TOGETHER , OK NOW IMMA GONNA GO PRAY SOME MORE , FOR MAH MENTAL CLARITY , SHIT , DON'T JUDGE !!!!!
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SERIOUSLY PAGODA THIS IS THE LAST TIME YOU STAB ME !!!!
I would TOTALLY FUCK John Mayer if given the chance. He's douchey yes, but he's also hot, funny and talented. Only, his dumpster dick is giving me second thoughts.
FattyMcFatFat would be a prettier demi moore if she was slimmer, she already has a very nice nose. Also props to her that she looks completely unimpressed by his proximity. I know you horz go wild for celebs you dont even like.
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"I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way."
PEOPLE!!!! Not to get all Psychology 101 on you but John Mayer was clearly a dork growing up, probably picked on, insecure, etc. Then he discovered his talent (which by the way, looking past his douchy ways I love his music and you cant deny that he has amazing talent) the girls started swarming. He we from geeky to craved and got high off the attention. Now that people are kinda over the initial appeal of him he has to do something to keep that attention going because once you get it, you feel worthless without it. So saying dumbass things in magazines or going out wasted or whatever the case may be, if his name gets mentioned in the papers he feels validated. Thats why I am thankful I have no ascertainable talents to flaunt or Id prolly turn into a worse mess than him!!!
End rant.
All of you in here ragging on the fat girl for being fat or Kelly Osborne for having leg muscles are retrograde jerky high school jocks, right?
Mayer iz a disgrace to the male gender. But I imagine he gets mo strange than most of us menz. {Total soaked dispozable tampon}. I like to drop mah PEARL DROPS completely across the WHITE teeth of the background bitch. She holding her lipz wide open for me! All creamiez on yo brunette puzzy.
Oh no I forgot summer time is when the hipster douche fests start to happen (SXSW, Coachella, Glastonbury, T in the Park, etc).
and Paris' transformation into Tammy Faye Baker is almost complete except her heart is still too small...
Submitted by fez on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 10:19pm.
does Solange look like Orlando Jones in drag?...
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Nah, she's just been reborn as a hipster. What a pity.
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"fuck you" is the new "thank you"
being an alumnus of lollapalooza, i'm a fan of outdoor music festivals and enjoy here people watching, but this shit i'm witnessing is dirty unwashed, fucked up looking folks and i don't like it...
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
does Solange look like Orlando Jones in drag?...
Damn! Johnny looks fucked up. I could drive my car through those pupils of his. I hope he wakes up in the morning next to the nastiest creature at Coachella, besides Paris. Is Perez Hilton in attendance?
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"And people try to tell me that God wasn't high on the good shit when he made this place" -by angel_i
Wow. Demi Moore sure has put on some weight lately.
Ugh! Coachella is so lame now. This shit is a treasure trove for http://www.latfh.com/
Submitted by swarm-of-locusts on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 6:24pm.
Judging by the giggling, entitled bitch in the background I'd say that Douche Meyer was dared to stand next to the fat chick and get his picture taken by the paps. Since he's a total frat-monkey Meyer was all too happy to go along with it for a cheap laugh at her expense.
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Exactly what I was thinking! What cunts.
I hope Mayer banged that warthog because she's about the only one left desperate enough to want to dong his schlong!
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I'm not a coke addict - I just like the way it smells.
http://www.modestneeds.org/
Judging by the giggling, entitled bitch in the background I'd say that Douche Meyer was dared to stand next to the fat chick and get his picture taken by the paps. Since he's a total frat-monkey Meyer was all too happy to go along with it for a cheap laugh at her expense.
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Coming soon to darken a sky near you.
I don't get how Wonky can spend so much time looking at herself in the mirror, especially out in public. Usually when you check the mirror when you're out it's a quick "do I have anything in my teeth? nothing hanging out of my nose? mascara running? hair sticking up? Cool *click*" Is she inspecting every single pore or what?
this pic reeks of 'spring break awkwardness'. john mayor is a mess. the chick is like, 'damn, im caught on film w/ this mess'. the bitch in the back is cracking up, probs cause john is attempting to recite some bullshit poetry and it was a p-creamer FAIL.
just to give an idea of how shady this cochella (or whateverthefuck) event was, i read lindsey blowhan was allowed in. nice.
end of times, folks, end of times.
=== "...Find...And Fulfill...Your Destiny..." ===
I thought you guys were exaggerating about Kelly Osbourne until I looked at the thumbnails. Damn! She looks like Shirley Booth from that 1952 movie, Come Back Little Sheba. She needs a new stylist and hairdresser right the fuck away.
I love how Parisite broke up with her douche BF for being too much of a famewhore. Pot. Kettle. Asshole.
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I'm not a coke addict - I just like the way it smells.
http://www.modestneeds.org/
And look at Parasite staring at her own reflection like she's God's gift to this earth. Bitch, please.
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My dream is that Wonky McValtrex eventually joins the Oprah/J. Aniston club of reaching 40 and never have breeded and too old to do it from then.
I'm loathed to say anything nice about Mayer but most rock guys wouldn't have given that girl the time of day.
I think she looks like a thicker demi moore. besides she probably doesnt want his doucheyass.
THIS dickbag needs to step away from real musicians before the angry desert land barfs another 7.0 and swallows his stank ass up.
Danny Devito is there because he and Michael Patton (Faith No More's front man) are good friends and Faith No More is playing tonight.
Poor Kelly Osborne. Nothing is going to take the chunk out of her stems. I mean her trunks.
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I'm not a coke addict - I just like the way it smells.
http://www.modestneeds.org/
Kelly O looks like 70 with that hairdo and that hair colour. I guess the dress could be kinda cute, but the combination of dress+hair makes her look like a granny.
Oh, I know, Kelly can be a size ZERO on her body, but her calves and cheeks will still be a size 14. She looks best a little bit bigger, I don't think she's that unfortunate looking. However, I'd have a mad complex about showing my legs if I was her.
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19 Cats and Counting!
The Mad Catter:
With her jughead and pregnant cankles, it is in Kelly's best interests not to fall below a certain weight.
At her current weight, Kirstie Alley is jealous!
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Basement Baby looks like she ran into Urban Outfitters, grabbed 5 random items off the clearance rack, threw them on and said "hell yeah I'm ready for Coachella, let's go!"
and is that a $4.99 covergirl compact Wonky is peering into?
and sadly for my final comment: it is with great horror that I see Eli Roth wearing a shirt that I also own. I love that shirt, how can I ever wear it again without immediately thinking of he and Peaches? gross.
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 2:12pm.
Kel will be fat again in 3, 2, 1....
LOL I don't know how many times I've read her "How I Got Skinny AGAIN!!" articles in tabloids...seems like it happens every few months.
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19 Cats and Counting!
Any time I see photos of Kelly Osbourne, my eyes make an immediate beeline to her legs and I ask myself...
"How her cankles durrin?"
Hometrick should look into shaving those bitches down!
Peaches Geldof is basically a crackbaby STILL on crack.
And someone please direct Paris towards the ho stroll, where she belongs.
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I agree with your take on this particular situation.
PuppyJuice.com
I'm sure Lindsay Lohan will be coked out of her mind for 72 hours straight.
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i don't "smoke" it was a once in a while thing..sorry- my little brother hates it too and it makes me sad so i don't all the time- Lindsay Lohan. March 29,2010.
I don't think even Russell Brand is enough of a douchebag for Katie Perry. She and Mayer are fucking MADE for each other. They should go away together on a rocket to a faraway planet in a fucking different UNIVERSE and start colonizing it with retardo-douche babies. Just as long as they stay the fuck away from Earth. I've had it with these assholes!
And as for Ricki Lake, Jr....that bitch ain't having it at ALL. She wouldn't drop a deuce on his chest for a billion pesos.
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19 Cats and Counting!
What a strange collection of clothes these people are wearing....
Is Wonky checking out the latest crab to join her collection?
Eli Roth is hot but he needs to dump the rotten fruit by his side-shes an embarassment to the English....
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
I agree with the comments on the bad fashion. I'm sure the Dlisters crew could put together better outfits with the shit they give RuPaul's Drag Race contestants than the fucking high cost, designer bullshit these people wear.
But I'm sure that's what Basement Baby wears in the basement.
"Why do people insist on jumping on the stupidest fashion trend bandwagons just because it's the IN THING"
reminds me of Sundance in recent years - where the douchiest of the privileged LA rich/hip crowd descends upon the area - not because they give a bloody fuck about film - but because it is where they need to be seen
Woodstock this is not - not even close
Submitted by toofargone on Sat, 04/17/2010 - 1:48pm.
if Summer's Eve was running for political office, this is what the campaign rally would look like
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ah ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!! hilarious!
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Life's a jest, and all things show it/I thought so once, but now I know it.
Oh and Mayo is still a douche
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Brian: You're drunk.
Stewie: You're sexy.
After looking at other Coochella festival pics it's obvious that, even with all that money, not one of them knows how to dress themselves.
Why do people insist on jumping on the stupidest fashion trend bandwagons just because it's the "IN THING". Fuck the in thing, I'm going back to sleep. Call me when people stop fashion raping the 80's (not exactly the best decade of fashion either) while fingering the 50's
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Brian: You're drunk.
Stewie: You're sexy.
if Summer's Eve was running for political office, this is what the campaign rally would look like