Tuesday, April 6th 2010
Dear Whit, Take The Rest Of The Month Off!
Whitney Houston postponed her show in Paris tonight due to an "upper respiratory infection" (throw in a crackingitis joke here), but now I know the real reason for why she didn't feel like taking the stage. Whit woke up this morning, watched a few seconds of this Taiwanese boy killing "I Will Always Love You," said "fuckit," pulled her sleepin' wig over her eyes and went back to bed!
Sleep it off, Whit, because this Asian Augustus Gloop with the bowl cut of all bowl cuts will gladly step in for you. All hail the new SuBo!
via Just Jared
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@Sandbitch
And they credited Dolly Parton, not Whitney Houston. YES!
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I think that's because Dolly wrote the song, right? It was probably a composer credit - I've seen them credit writers on shows like this.
But I've always loved Dolly's version, too. I grew up hearing that version and was really *surprised* when Whitney covered it. But it worked for her, too. Still, it's Dolly's song. She's fab.
Look at you with those dental fricatives, girlfriend!
Loud and proud. Loud and proud.
@Hoity Toity: You clearly have the gift of turning your own experiences into something uplifting and inspiring for others. Therefore all is not lost, I'd say.
Sandbitch, I believe the screen caption is crediting Dolly as the writer of the song.
I dunno know about y'all, but I think the Dolly version is truly, truly heart-rending. Dolly's voice in its prime is unmatched, IMO.
He sounds GREAT! That hair, on the other hand...
This one has real hair and gets the high notes; shitney only gets high in the bathroom nowadays.
He is best. He has been worse than that, when he is worse he is little better than a beast.
if they had dropped the key,he had used his real voice in places and did the same up-key vocals in the chorus etc it would have been perfect but in 60% of the song all i hear is a guy imitating,
And they credited Dolly Parton, not Whitney Houston. YES!
GO DOLLY!
(R.I.P. to my daddy)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_utP1mGoutQ
Adorable.. How can you resist a chubby asian kid in a suit with a bowl cut and bow tie singing Whitney Houston.
You go little man!! Sing it!
The voice is great but sweet Juniper Jesus that's quite the look (he's?) got going there. Is that a Corning or a Tuperware cut?
I think he sings it pretty good, better than what Whitney can do now in any case. And he looks like Russell the Wilderness Explorer... awwww.
Hm, maybe I've been watching to much cute kitty videos on YouTube...
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Good
As
You
CASTRATE him NOW!!
serious goose bumps here...(does anybody even say that anymore???)
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...the end
Awww "Asian Augustus Gloop" is fantastic. Bravo my man. Bravo.
@hoity toity- you sound like a very sweet person!
Okay, I want to roll this kid in a ball and stuff him up my vajayjay so that I can give birth to him and call him mine. I want him as my baby! Come into my vajayjay nowww!
Despite the way he looks like a South Park character this kid is the shiznit! His range and pitch were amazing, as well as his control. I guess Asian peope don't lose their shiz like we do because our audience would have raised the roof.
Oh, and his hair. It reminds me of a scene in 'Bam Bam and Celeste' when Margaret Cho's mother was happy about her hair and she was patting it and preening, saying, 'Oh so berry berry nice. So convenient.' LMAO!
I don't understand why people have these death pools and Whitney is never mentioned?
I mean, she's in her 40's and her body has been abused for YEARS, her heart and other organs must be tremendously weakened.
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"I can resist everything but temptation."
Holy Shit.
Who needs Whitney - throw a wig on him and send that kid on tour.
The best part is the 'awe shit' look that chick he's singing against gives him when she knows she's off the show.
The title should have said "Dear shit, take the rest of your life off!"
How the mighty have fallen. She used to be the 80's pop diva golden girl; now she's just a crackhead wierdo. Who knows, she probably bailed because she had to pass another doody bubble (thanks to asshole bobby brown, that will probably be stuck in my mind for a good long time)...
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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits
Wow! this little Susan Boyle is the shit!
Whitney just can't quit the crack.
Team Whitney and crack forever!
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Dealbreakers: Man He No Good For You by Lesbian Yellow Sourfruit
And another gay star is being born in China. That kid's dedication to sound exactly like Whit brings me to that conclusion. I ought to know-- that was me at his age. No straight boy would do that seriously and in public. And the Chinese are extremely judgemental--I hung out enough of them to know. The difference between him and I is that I didn't have his courage, his obvious acceptance level and the opportunity to be myself at his age. Now that I am a big ol' mo, I wish I had tuned into some of my less than manly talents and tried at least to nourish them and see what I could have done with them. But I supressed them and now I have lost them completely. It is quite sad, when you think about it. So I say BRAVO to that kid and I hope he pursues his talent and takes it to its maximum level.
Is there anyway we could get the Asian Augustus Gloop on American Idol this season?
It would be nice to have someone who can actually sing on that program...
Month? She should just friggin retire already.
Submitted by beakers bitch on Tue, 04/06/2010 - 10:01pm.
LOL, Debra Wilson from Mad TV does an awesome Whitney...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQL6eV77tjI
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lol...good one. here's another one from MadTv:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stluj3krlP8&feature=related
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Don't hate me cause I'm DLeautiful
Very good, kid! I wonder how he will sound when his nurnies drop?
Submitted by Soultonic on Tue, 04/06/2010 - 7:14pm.
I love it...anything that goes wrong to Whitney, all she has to do is blame it on Bobby. I keep thinking about Madtv and SNL making fun of Whitney.
LOL, Debra Wilson from Mad TV does an awesome Whitney...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQL6eV77tjI
respiratory infection to a crack head equals sex addiction to an entitled horny man/woman who can't leave the skanks alone...
that bowlcut dude's singing wasn't half bad...
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
So that was awesome. Too bad he ain't got no titties.
♥ Threadkilla!
Why I love Daniel Tosh:"That skateboard hit him right in the vagina!"
I don't know what planet I'm on, but I kinda like it.
Wow. That is a performance I would PAY every penny of my minimum wage on. Who needs gas and electricity!? His voice will light up the room and make everyone's b-hole tingle!!!!!!!!
He's like old Whitney without crack, I'd pay to see him in Vegas for money.
That Taiwanese kid is good, especially considering he probably doesn't speak English fluently.
"Sleepin' wig". OMG!!!
"Get up and put your BITCHFACE on!"
That kid kilt it, for real.
That's talent right there! Although, the word "castrati" did flash through my mind during the entire performance.
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19 Cats and Counting!
How old is he? He's quite the singer, just wonder what will happen when the voice starts to crack.
Asian people are so stylish
<"Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on Tue, 04/06/2010 - 7:48pm.">
Wikipedia says Grant and Gill are still married.
What ever happened to the rest of Whitney Houston's Australian tour? Last we saw she was hideous in Melbourne with people calling it the worst show ever and she was headed off to Sydney.
Hate to admit it, but he was pretty darned good!
Wow, I think that was the nicest thing I have ever said on dlisted!
I thought when you say "killing it" you mean some William Hung shit, but this guy is amazing !!!... A Mariah in the making (without the crazyness)
"Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 04/06/2010 - 7:47pm.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XafBLDVtF7Y
Dolly singing her song with about as much difficulty as walking across the room (Vince Gill gives the best response to her). I hate these shrieking drama queen versions of a simple country song no matter how entertaining your hair."
Is Vince Gill still married to Amy Grant? What a scandal that was.
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
BOBBAY!!! BOBBAY!!!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XafBLDVtF7Y
Dolly singing her song with about as much difficulty as walking across the room (Vince Gill gives the best response to her). I hate these shrieking drama queen versions of a simple country song no matter how entertaining your hair.
That was amazing. I never heard that song sung so well except for when Whitney could still do it.
Have to go find the other contestants offering and see hear weep.
Whitney may be a crackhead but she did not butcher 'I Will Always Love You'.
They are just two totally different versions. And of course there are several now.
And Dolly never complained once those royalty checks started coming in!
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Maybe if I sounded like this guy, my neighbors would stop pounding on my walls begging me to stop singing Whitney Houston tunes at 5 in the morning.
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
I quite like that Glamberty dyke at the beginning, she's quite hot, so are the 2 other people at the front.
Sounds like Friar Tucks voice hasnt dropped yet so he can definitly stand in for Whit for the time being.......
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
Holy shit! Hang it up, Whit - this fellow (!) can sing circles around you.
But what was with all the graphics and stuff on the screen all the time? They were distracting.
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"What he lacked in feet, he made up for in inches." --BK, on having sex with a midget
Fab voice, I don't think he was lip synching because usually lip-synching comes in to rescue the visually pleasing and aurally unfortunate (à la Jennifer Lopez).