A Refugee From RPattz's Magical Unicorn Forest
Kelis galloped into the Data Awards in Los Angeles last night looking like something Mimi's brain might burp up during a champagne-fueled daydream. What do we focus on? Do we focus on the Jane Child nostril-to-earlobe chains? The unicorn of liberty crown? The feather lashes? The mutant goat hooves? The old lady braid? NO! Direct your eyes to Kelis' suffocating vagina! The only kind of rubber a vagina wants to eat is a condom. Why does Kelis have to do her chocha like that?
When she finally freed her snatch from the wall of latex later on in the night, it probably needed mouth-to-mouth. Pussy abuse is not the look.
And Kelis also needs less internet in her life, because she's starting to get fashion tips from YouTube:
However, I will give it up for the intergalactic being from a disco ball far far away posing with Kelis below.
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That nappy camel toe is just nasty.
She kind of reminds me of a half-assed pink version of the blue alien opera/disco diva in The Fifth Element: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJB5Rqc1m0Y
Madge's roided out vagina desperately seeking a wax.
Yawn.
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
Submitted by Little miss on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 1:30pm.
Those are Alexander McQueen's "fairy shoes", normally he makes ok gear, but this time ist's just plain fugly.
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Totally agreed.
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
http://www.ilads.org/
Mariah would wear that outfit as a tube sock.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Her twat must smell like death after being wrapped up in that thing. Hope she doesn't wear it when she's raggin'.
I have an uncontrollable urge to put those shoes on and walk around the block. Just once to see what they feel like. *falls off shoes and dies from subdural hemotoma"
"What's your motto?" "Kill everyone NOW"
W....T....F....
B!i!i!iD~
For your health.
Even skinny bitches would need a shoehorn to get into that fish outfit thing.
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"This is why I beat hookers" - Tig from Sons of Anarchy
must there be a thumbnail dedicated to her crotch? tell me those aren't fish scales.
rotfflmao.
damn. is it 2012 yet?
So this is what she is spending Nas' money on? HA! Oh man, too bad for him!
Um, Kellis? Halloween was, like, almost four months ago....time to put away the clown getup, honey. Really now.... What the FUCK is wrong with you?!?!
"People are strange when you're a stranger..." ~ The Doors
Kelis was edgy when GaGa was still in middle school. Has anyone in 10 years matched the playful yet dark female empowerment/misandrist "Caught Out There" video?
Looking like some broke ass Amber!
Kanye's Amberbot will be so fucking pissed she didn't think of this outfit for herself!
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Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 01/27/2010 - 5:42pm.
This site should be fun only. The petty shit fucks up my buzz.
Avatwat--more alien tentacle brain sex and camel toe than the original.
This is why I hate when people call movies "cultural phenomenons," 'cause it invariably leads to dumb shit like this.
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Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are you you gonna bite?
Satan's prom date.
"Well, it is very nice to meet ya'll motherfuckers an' ho's." Shanaynay (Shane Dawson)
Little early for Halloween.
She looks wet. Is she turned on my her horse tail braid as much as I am?
...............
Back to Black.
While I have to admit that that is one massive cameltoe, I also have to admit I'm a little embarrassed that I allow myself to look at peoples' coochies so closely.
♥ Threadkilla!
And it isn't in education. It's history. It's poetry...It's in DListed.
~ J.D. Salinger, adapted by caprica six
Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 3:25pm.
Bitch, you are somebody's mother. Tone that shit down.
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I hear you. But to be fair, this is nowhere near the fuckery Shauna Sands is subjecting her daughters to.
At least this ho's cooch is covered and not flapping around like a freak flag.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
Bitch, you are somebody's mother. Tone that shit down. One day your kid is gonna google you and see your sweaty cooched, My Little Pony on meth ensemble and wonder why God allowed you to happen to him.
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
her crotch is scaring me....what is going on there...too much sweat...I guess...of all the weirdness going on that is what I ended up focusing on....if you are gonna sweat down there wear a color that ain't gonna show it off...that is just downright nastae!!!
I like her makeup and hair, what can I say?
I actually kind of love this. I wonder how she dresses her new baby.
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http://evolutionflashback.blogspot.com
Plecostomus, this should totally be your next avie! PLEASE!!!
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Chris Brown needs to like, wow, take that stupid ass bow tie and shove it down his throat. It's like, wow. WOW. --MK 8/31/09
I hate it when people wear the exact same thing as me.
http://www.TopTwitsBlog.com
All of the best celebrity tweets in one sarcastic package.
I can't believe I'm drawing attention to this... but she appears to have a sweat patch in an 'unsavoury area' in the third thumbnail. It's either the troll dude or the latex that's responsible.
Nas must be doing backflips of joy.
"Well, it is very nice to meet ya'll motherfuckers an' ho's." Shanaynay (Shane Dawson)
Shoot it!! SHOOT IT, NOW!!! Before it gets away.....
lol is that dude one of rpatz's warrior unicorns. there is something wrong with me because i find unicorn dude strangely attractive
I swear I thought this was Ambot at first. Kanye -this is the kind of bent chick you need!
YousayyougotmybabybutIknowitainttrue
*double post*
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
i thought kelis couldn't afford milk? is what she spends nas's money on?
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
HOurs spent on that make up but we'd rather see her crotch
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 2:05pm.
What in the name of all that is sacred is going on between Kelis' legs?!
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Her famous milkshake dripping down to the yard.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
no cameltoe!
Gaga just got a lot more appealing to me. What in the name of all that is sacred is going on between Kelis' legs?!
THIS IS SERIOUSLY GROSSING ME OUT!!!!!
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"Sucky&Fucky, You were so gentle, wise and patient with Fishsticks. You're amazing!" - little_rascal
Submitted by little_rascal on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 1:27pm.
Whoa! Even Lady CaCa couldn't come up with something like that! The cone spikes on her head, the long furry gray tail hanging from her head to the floor, the shiny mauve catsuit, the Alien shoes, the exquisite camel-toe ...
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Lady Caca is wearing these fairy shoes in her latest video (Romance ?) Kelis must have gotten a fat chunk of her divorce to afford that outfit.
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There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.
--Buddha
Submitted by You_Complete_Me. on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 1:38pm.
I always thought it was her boobs. Boobs make milk=milkshake?
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Jeniloonies, please start your assault now, since I have dared to insult your cat-lady goddess.
(Dementa 1/27/09)
Submitted by Plecostomus on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 1:19pm.
Submitted by You_Complete_Me. on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 1:15pm.
WTF is a Kellis? Kelis?
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Her milkshake used to bring the boys to the yard. Until it curdled.
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Ah. OK. Thank you, plecostomus. May I now be so bold as to ask what the hell her "milkshake" is in reference to? I have a couple theories...
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- "If (Tila) actually gives birth, she'll forget where she put the baby one night while she's getting ready to go out and that will be the end of that. She is such a pustule on the buttocks of the world." - Dog
@ Snowpiece
Snowy, did you see that unicorn's muscles??? He is going to be featured in my new sexual fantasy! Did you see his HORN ??? OMG!
Best Goodbye Horses ever!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-Xl_Zx9m5Y
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Jeniloonies, please start your assault now, since I have dared to insult your cat-lady goddess.
(Dementa 1/27/09)
Those are Alexander McQueen's "fairy shoes", normally he makes ok gear, but this time ist's just plain fugly.
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There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.
--Buddha
"Goodbye Horses" = Married to the Mob --> Silence of the Lambs --> Clerks II --> Unicorn
yeah
Whoa! Even Lady CaCa couldn't come up with something like that! The cone spikes on her head, the long furry gray tail hanging from her head to the floor, the shiny mauve catsuit, the Alien shoes, the exquisite camel-toe ...
I know this is about Kelis, but I'm more fascinated by the YouTube Jamie Gumb Unicorn.
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Jeniloonies, please start your assault now, since I have dared to insult your cat-lady goddess.
(Dementa 1/27/09)
Jack: don't be irrational
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
Oh and you guys with your creative avies....cracks me up every time!