Pop Open The Andre, Pebbles!
Glamberace, Alien Princess RiRi, Shakira and Lady CaCa all had new albums last week, but Susan Boyle showed all of those little bitches how a true gangsta really does it! Pebbles' favorite vato sold 701,000 copies of her debut cover album "I Dreamed a Dream." This gave her the #1 album of the week and also the biggest chart debut of the year.
Now you know why your cat was rifling through your purse. That pussy was fishing for a bill, so it could go out and support its QUEEN! And Jennifer Aniston's friends and family are all getting a copy of their Christmas stocking, because cat ladies got to stick together.
Here's The Top 10 albums of the week according to Billboard:
1. SuBo - I Dreamed A Dream - 701,000
2. Andrea Boccelli - My Christmas - 218,000
3. Glamberace - For Your Entertainment - 198,000
4. RiRi - Rated-R - 181, 000
5. Lady CaCa - The Fame Monster (EP) - 174,000
6. Lady CaCa - The Fame - 151,000
7. Miley Cyrus - The Time Of Our Lives - 150,000
8. Taylor Swift - Fearless - 125,000
9. Carrie Underwood - Play On - 124,000
10. Norah Jones - The Fall - 110,000
15. Shakira - She Wolf - 89,000
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I wouldn't buy any of those CDs...
Submitted by Raniya on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 4:30pm.
Wow Shakira sold so little, what a shame her album is actually pretty descent.
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You're Kidding right? i've heard two of her songs and they suck big monkey balls....i'm glad that album didn't do well, that serves her right for being such a sell out.... anyway i'm glad Susan boyle is first...hahaha take that overly sexualized bitches!
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
*Awaiting for the arrival of the hipster train to lecture about music I don't know about...*
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"Do you even know who I am, fucking idiot?...Google me, you dumb fuck."
This list tells me that people have really really shitty taste in music. This is like a dark age for popular music.
Congratulations to SuBo.
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
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Submitted by Fronika on Thu, 12/03/2009 - 3:22am.
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Instead of my jacksy, can I stick it up my Khyber Pass instead? :)
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You're not the only one who just smiled like a farting toddler~~ MK
SuBo can sing. Shove your sarky comments about her up your jacksy. Oh wait, don't, you'd probably enjoy it.
"No matter how cynical you become, it's impossible to keep up." - Lily Tomlin
So, are we assuming that there are now 701,000 White Elephant gifts in circulation?
I do like Andrea Bocelli but I hate Christmas music (bah humbug), so I'll be giving that one a pass. And Norah Jones was alright when she first came on the scene, but everything she's done since sounds the same to me. Kind of like she's going to lapse into a coma halfway through. As for the rest of this shit, well... it's shit.
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You're not the only one who just smiled like a farting toddler~~ MK
show um miss boyle!
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"she is lucky to be alive, because that ugly stick almost beat her to death".
hotmess119's dad.
I hope Susan Boyle chokes on a hairball after sucking her cats off.
That's the only dick(or "pussy")that fat square faced yellow toothed crazy bitch will ever get.
Let's be honest this bitch claims she has never had a "real kiss" which means she still has a cherry(and look at her....of course no guy wanted THAT even when she was younger!)
I hope her pets over the years have at least gotten some enjoyment out of Susan exploring her sexuality while violating them...but I doubt her animals even enjoyed it.
Susan nasty fake youtube boyle should just die already....seriously!
"I just plain don't listen to modern "music"."
Exactly. Even if Susan Boyle has a better voice in radio, there's just too much garbage songs that threaten to twist my balls and rip them off hard. Christ, there is almost no escape to any DListed artist that plays 24/7. Thank God for iPods, or I wouldn't be able to listen to classic metal.
It's great that SuBo's album has sold 1/2 million more than the next guy!! Good for her.
Submitted by anhydre on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 2:42pm.
Woah! 700 000??! Eat shit Sharon Osbourne!
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It's not like Sharon ever claimed Susan wouldn't sell. Sharon just stated Susan Ass Boil looks like a "hairy arshole"
....and that is still CORRECT no matter how many albums the hideous crazy hag sells!
No shit? I saw the commercial for it and thought, "What a shame that nice Welsh lady with the monkey foot on her lip isn't going to sell any of those cd's."
Damn, did I call that one wrong! Next, you're going to tell me that Chia Obama is sold out.
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Champion fist-pumper and true inventor of the friggin' pouf.
Submitted by SpiceDong on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 5:57pm.
A cover album! After all the hoopla she could not get someone to write a few original songs for her? Oh well she is set for life even if she doesn't sell any more copies.
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That's the draw tho. I saw it when I worked in record stores. It's the geezers feeling nostalgic for the past. They have all their old favourites and when they pick a voice they like they go after it full-throttle like a tween on Miley Cyrus. That's how she sold so many. Really - the geezers are SO easy.
♥ Threadkilla!
"I told him to tell her to be herself. I think he did and now she's bein a whore!"
~ david Letterman - Staff Fucker
http://www.bestofthe2000s.com/media5.html
"piggy is listed and dlisted isn't! Fuckers." ~ TITS VOTE!
Andrea Boccelli can sell albums without all the bullshit of 'scandal', costumes or masks. Good for him.
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FUCK THE MUSIC INDUSTRY!!!!!!!!!!
And that woman's teeth look worse than anyone I have ever seen down South!
Her head is the shape of a square!
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Got dayum, that is a list of shitty music! How do hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people not know that there is good music in the world?? Available, immediately, right now, for your enjoyment.
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ASUUU MADREEE!!!!!
Yeah, this is my fault. I bought SuBo's debut CD for my MIL for Xmastimes.
♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little dream of me
butter teefs
Fuck, I hope she can at least afford to get some veneers on those god dam teeth!
Wow Shakira sold so little, what a shame her album is actually pretty descent.
"Canta y Encanta a tu Pueblo Tigresa"
I am SHOCKED! The death of music is true.
I think the Brits were ordering from the U.S. to boost the numbers. Who the fuck would buy albums from this woman.
The only, THE ONLY REASON, why this woman has any attention is because she's an ugly, semi-retarded twit who has a lovely voice. It just doesn't match. If she was a beautiful woman with the same voice, no one would notice.
Glad I stopped buy albums years ago.
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There's no crying in butt sex!- Michael K
I think some Crest Whitestrips are in order.
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"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."
RiRi has a lesbian song??? I blame Katy Perry.
i totally love riri's lesbian song
i can so picture it being sung for beyonce
Yay for Susan and Cat Ladies every where!
Sisters [and Cat Ladies] are doin' it for themselves
Standin' on their own two feet
And ringin' on their own bells
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"This is what we call the floating world . . .” (Ryoi, c.1661)
" . . . the world needs to be shut down. I mean it this time. SHUT IT DOWN". (MK, c.2009)
who buys this fuckery???
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still...TEAM VINCE BITCHES
A good teeth whitener or veneers would do wonders for Susan Boyle.
i don't know how I feel about SuBo...i'm happy for her, i guess. i just don't "get" it. VIVA SWAG!
www.vivaswag.com
www.thatssoswag.com
Submitted by KD on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 3:19pm.
It was at least 9.99, but the "deluxe" album was 13.99, which had those 8 songs, plus most of her other (first?) album on it. It's weird.
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Sorry for the double post. Damn intertubes. Anyways, 9.99 is still way overpriced for 8 CaCa-songs. I wouldn't want to be caught dead with one of her many, many albums. I'll be spending my money on Them Crooked Vultures, thank you very much.
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****************SO SAY WE ALL*********************
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Submitted by DushieBlue on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 3:16pm.
Submitted by KD on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 3:02pm.
Seriously? It costs 13.99?? I haven't been in a record store in years, but that is daylight robbery. So she is actually treating this as her second album. And people actually buy into this shit. This is why we shouldn't care about global warming, because humanity is doomed anyway.
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It was at least 9.99, but the "deluxe" album was 13.99, which had those 8 songs, plus most of her other (first?) album on it. It's weird.
Submitted by KD on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 3:02pm.
Wow! That is pretty good!
I was offended when I looked at Lady Caca's CD in target. 8 songs. I'm not paying 13.99 or even 9.99 for friggin 8 songs.
Seriously? It costs 13.99?? I haven't been in a record store in years, but that is daylight robbery. So she is actually treating this as her second album. And people actually buy into this shit. This is why we shouldn't care about global warming, because humanity is doomed anyway.
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****************SO SAY WE ALL*********************
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Submitted by KD on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 3:02pm.
Wow! That is pretty good!
I was offended when I looked at Lady Caca's CD in target. 8 songs. I'm not paying 13.99 or even 9.99 for friggin 8 songs.
Seriously? It costs 13.99?? I haven't been in a record store in years, but that is daylight robbery. So she is actually treating this as her second album. And people actually buy into this shit. This is why we shouldn't care about global warming, because humanity is doomed anyway.
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****************SO SAY WE ALL*********************
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I do not care for SuBo or her "music", but god bless her and AnBo for keeping Lady CaCa from #1. There is truly no bitch I hate more on this earth than her right now.
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I just plain don't listen to modern "music".
Susan needs to have dermabrasion on her teefs.
(or something)
But at least she did get those brows tended to.
YES! Janey! that song is awesome, and Speeachless also!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
Good for SuBo!
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Douchechill!
Plecostomus, HA HA HA HA!! Your avie is killing me!
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Wish Granted! >:)
tonta: *raises hand*
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
okay, i have to admit...I am kinda addicted to that lady gaga bad romance song. *shameface*
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 2:46pm.
xerquina for Glamberance? I guess you didn't know me during last season when I always had his picture for an avie! LOL
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glamerpuss I'd already figured but the other two?!
*shakes heads* you sold out :(
WHY THE FUCK DO YOU WANT TO LISTEN TO MUSIC THAT EITHER MAKES YOU WANT TO FUCKING SLEEP OR GIVES YOU A FUCKING MIGRANE FROM ALL THE BACKGROUND NOISE?
Wow! That is pretty good!
I was offended when I looked at Lady Caca's CD in target. 8 songs. I'm not paying 13.99 or even 9.99 for friggin 8 songs.
RiRi is HOT
and BTW before all the Caca fans get their pants in a twist (are there any on Dlisted?) I meant the last post in an ironic fashion as SuBo smashing the charts to pulp means that the world as we know it is so fucked we should all just stick our heads into the nearest jet engine and welcome tinitus as an option over all this shit.
I'll burn that bridge when I come to it....
NEVER EVER underestimate the pensioners and there hard earned money stashed under the bed and their free bus passes to the Record Store. yeah I said it "Recordstore" You remember that old fing where you can buy real product. Its a reason to leave the house for them.
SuBo and the kitty massive are a force to be reckoned with and as much as it makes me wanna stab my ears out its more honest and sincere then that phony Caca bitch and her tryhard everything.
'll burn that bridge when I come to it....
Her teeth...ICK!!!!! They shoulda fixed those for her too.....I think I threw up a little
~Madness as you know, Is like gravity. All it takes is a little push....
xerquina for Glamberance? I guess you didn't know me during last season when I always had his picture for an avie! LOL
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown