Raise A Glass, Gold Diggers Of The World!
If nothing gives you a soul boner like a wallet full of money, then grab a Kleenex and keep the lube close, because this is truly beautiful news that'll make you weep tears of joy from your eye holes to your genitals! Brynne Gordon, the delicate CA flower who wowed the world with her refined tastes, married a giant leathery bag of cash in a truly elegant wedding in Australia yesterday. Even IN THIS ECONOMY, gold diggers continue to triumph! Inspiring.
In front of more than 500 guests. 26-year-old (in Lohan years) Brynne promised 66-year-old Australian multi-millionaire Geoffrey Edelsten that she will be with him "til bankruptcy does them part."
The wedding will go down in history as one of the most expensive in Australia. The total cost was around $3 million. Brynne wore $500,000 in diamonds and arrived in a helicopter. Fran Drescher and Jason Alexander were paid to host the reception. You know, because nothing makes crystal sparkle like The Nanny and George Costanza. At first, Brynne wanted one of her idols, Kelly Bundy, to host the event, but she's going to save her for the divorce party.
Congratulations to the happy couple! And condolences to Geoffrey's checking account, because Brynne is going to tear that bitch up!
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I don't think buxom blondes worry about the economy in the traditional sense. They have their own pseudo-economy which revolves around the number of rich men in their area. It's sort of like being a scavenger.....you'll never starve because things are always dying. When you're Anna Nicole Smith or this woman you never have to worry because there will probably always be an older man with money who will do whatever it takes to gain the company of a cheap woman. HOWEVER, Ms. Gordon might be out of luck after Anna's claim finally fails in the 9th Circuit (as all signs seem to be pointing that way....which will finally be a well deserved relief for the Marshall family). That will set precedent and future kept-women might have to consider actually earning a living.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Submitted by KarrieAnne on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 11:01am.
Shiiiiiiit.......That Bitch was 26 in 1976. That's the manliest 26 I've ever seen. He looks like a fucking Weekend at Bernie's stunt double.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
KarrieAnn "....Weekend at Bernie's stunt double."
KarrieAnn !
ahah :D
Yes, 66 is way too vibrant for this flaky bit of decrepitude and he probably got the fake tan courtesy of the funeral parlor prepping him for his next ceremony when they realized he was still alive (Nice try, Brynne!). Still, as unsavory as he is, that kind of money deserves at least a "Platinum Digger" and that chick, she is no butterface - she looks like she's hitting 49 and was kicked off of the Stepford Wives of Orange County. She's got those wobbly arms that, srsly, can't be 26, because she's gonna have suet bags there any day now. I don't typically envy others, even w/ money - but it's extreme how undesirable their company must be to get no better than Jason Alexander. I imagine they tried to get the Soup Nazi and even he turned them down.
The Pratt family left me speechless.
That is the best he could do with that money? He needs to get a refund.
If Hugh Hefner can get 3 hotter pieces this dude should have at least gotten one hot one. I mean he's a lot richer than Hefner and you probably don't have to do half the gross shit those other girls have to. I guess he must be getting cataracts because even a blind man can see she's not 26. *cough* 36 *cough*
"There are three things I'm afraid of clowns, homeless people and drag queens" - Jeff Lewis
With all his money he should invest in some crest white strips. May want to give some to his bride as well. She is looking pretty worn for 26.
First of all, Georgie-boy and the Nanny, now that's classy!
Secondly, I don't think there's enough Bombay in the world to make any amount of money worth facing that wrinkly old deek. When you are broke and suckin dicks for gas money, you may think you could do it, but you'd be wrong. Once your fingers and wrists are full of baubles and you are on your way home to that wrinkly old fucker in your tricked out Jag, you will have a moment of clarity and drive into a tree at 90mph. It ain't like the old days when geezers just took alot a naps and talked dirty 'cause that's all they can do sexually. He's probly ALL viagra'd out! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Either she will switch them shits for valium when he isn't looking, or the next time we see her she will have an expression on her face like Anna Nicole. Why don't they learn?! The memory of that expired come glooping down your throat will fuck you up FOREVER! No amount of money and no drug can erase it!!! If Anna couldn't do it, no bitch can!!!
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There's nothing like a little black pussy!
Gad she looks beat for 26. He can do better than that.
p.s. - that's a man!
i can only imagine the private pre-reception jokes between fran and jason! what an embarrasing gig
I have to say, in 2009 gold diggers have gotten it done. It seemed like every other week some chick was hitting the jackpot by getting wifed up or knocked up by some sack of money.
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I am not a pussy.
Plecostomus your avatars crack up.
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Dale Doback: Okay, here's the shot out of the cannon: Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one, go!
I told Mr. IV that if we met an elderly moneybags who had a cronyboner for me I would divorce him, marry the moneybags, and keep ex-Mr.-IV for a lover.
Which also sounds like a made for TV Lifetime movie.
♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little dream of me
Oh Yeah. 'Cause nothing says "TRAILER TRASH" quite like a rhinestone bra to hold back those fake frankentittied bolt on cans. This chick is Anna Nicole Smith in training; a total money grubbing, gold digging whore.
Old dude is fake tanned, fake hair colored and has a wonky eye. He looks drugged & propped up; 66 my ass. Gold digger is at least in her mid 30's; no way she's 26. Looks like the basis of their "union" is the lies they've already told each other...
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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits
Fran Drescher? LOL!
She will never replace my greatest gold digger of all time, Anna Nichole, but I wish her well.
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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.
She looks like a loose meat sandwich. And that wedding.. it looks elegant like a Travelers wedding.
never liked Jason Alexander.. mean looking small eyes and just unpleasant. Why would you want that around while you drink champagne? He'd be better off hosting a night at 'Millions of Milkshakes'
Can she use some of his cash to fix her teef?
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
I'm more disapointed that Jason Alexander agreed to be part of this fuckery. Fran Drescher, well...
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Get the fucking ads out of the comments section!!!
Yeah, for being a triumphant, gold digger, she's pretty beat in the face. He looks out of it.
Her makeup could be a little better on her wedding day, her face still looks rough. How is this ho 26, I'm 23 but I could be her daughter. But from the photos she does look kinda into him. So good for her.
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"I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way."
wow thats some proper stick on hair scene he got going on. Couldnt he afford to match some sideburns into the plugs/wig?
Nice sparkleee suit too.
She looks like a moose.
I'll burn that bridge when I come to it....
she's no prize...trophy wise
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
The only difference between that woman and a street whore is that she is turning the same trick every night.
Wow I'm impressed. The woman is fat, fug, AND old with back zits yet she still managed to land an old codger with loot. So what if said codger looks as though he's missing several billion brain cells? Does that have anything to do with anything?
"I told the troot, and I have fate the troot will prevail."
lol she's like 7 inches taller than he is. she looks like goliath. she's a butterface too
http://www.dlisted.com/node/32176
"Jeanne Pratt - Jeanne's husband, Richard, was one of the richest dudes in Australia and he passed away recently, so ole' girl has been all over the place. It's Jeanne's time to shine! However, I'm a little concerned. She's getting this title because of her architecturally stunning Logo-like hair, but Jeanne really needs to work on the eyebrow situation. Mostly because...she doesn't have any! Maybe she has a whisper of an eyebrow, but that's not enough! Jeanne is already richer than Ouiser Boudreaux by a million miles, but a pair of exquisite delicately drawn eyebrows would complete her life!
For CRaig" -Friday, May 22nd 2009
"All Hat, No Cattle"
No way that peepaw is 66, 77 yes, 66 no way.
Fran Drecher is, to the day, 10 years older than me, born 30. september, 1957. Still, I don't look any younger than her. Fuck!
Has anyone had a gander at the australian news.nine link
image 3 of 9
"Molly Meldrum and Millie Minogue arrive at Crown Casino for the wedding reception. (AAP)"
There is apparently such a thing as a Millie Minogue and what a glam vision she is.
image 6 of 9
"Richard Pratt's daughter Fiona Geminder, Totti Goldsmith, Jeanne Pratt and Anthony Pratt."
So REAL money actually attended the wedding as well. Mrs Jeanne Pratt was mentioned several months ago on Dlisted. "Teh Hotness" runs deep in the Pratt family.
image 9 of 9
"AFL player Anthony Koutafides and his wife Susie. (AAP)"
Arguably a butterface but a reminder that Australian Rules Football player are hotties and remember they run around in those short shorts.
"All Hat, No Cattle"
Shiiiiiiit.......That Bitch was 26 in 1976. That's the manliest 26 I've ever seen. He looks like a fucking Weekend at Bernie's stunt double.
When will these old limp dick Bastards learn????Don't be surprised if she starts serving you "special tea" at night Pops.
She may be a rough 26, but my ass he's 66. That's a sun-dried 76 if he's a day over Madonna.
Wow...Joe Pesci really hit the wall.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
Oh she was HS of the wk in september. No wonder she looked familiar
http://www.dlisted.com/node/34106
Coma Caca!!
dear. lord.
i made the mistake of clicking the "married a giant leathery bag" link and clicked through the pics... picture 6 (of 9, ha) has a definite candidate for hot slut of the year! :D
I think I'm going to just give in, get me lots of scrips and hook up with an old rich man for the $$$... I need the scrips to be near him, much less TOUCH him.
Gah!
It takes a special kind of woman to do this... strong stomach and a hunger for cash.
It's the Anna Nicole Smith boobs who wowed him! And you know what happened to ANS's elderly husband! Live and learn.
Morning all!
Where did this chick meet him at? I need the dating website where they met
Coma Caca!!
She must of caught the fever off Fran Fine! Remember when she was 28 for 6 years in the 90's.
I feel sorry for the squeezed boob.
Which boob wants to be squeezed against an old man's shoulder.....seriously....?
26? Bitch hasn't seen 26 in a LONG time.
Costanza has a sarcastic look on his face. Mermaid hair and a mermaid wedding dress. Classy. That first pic looks like a cool christmas pageant ice capades stage.
Bitch is catted. Both of them. She looks like my bf's ex and that's just fucking scary.
Aww, how romantic.
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I like living this way. I like loving this way.
Wow, gross. Although the black/brown hair dye sure does make him look like a spring chick! Not a day over 102!
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"Kanye west is the biggest piece of shit on earth. Quote me." ~ Pink
This guy is absolutely incredible!!!! He flies a pink helicopter! Hot slut of the Month!!!!!
Here's a quote from his Wikipedia page:
"Edelsten was known as a flamboyant entrepreneur in the 1980s, transforming the idea of what a doctor's surgery was with chandeliers, grand pianos and 24 hour opening. He also had mink-covered examination benches, mansions and a fleet of Rolls-Royces and Lamborghinis sporting number plates such as Macho, Spunky and Sexy."
Also, "Edelsten was deregistered for practising in New South Wales in 1988 and also in Victoria. He subsequently spent a year in jail for soliciting an underworld figure, Christopher Dale Flannery, to assault a former patient, and for perverting the course of justice."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geoffrey_Edelsten
i thought that was that megan houserman bitch, you know the one sharon osborne snatched out her weave... lol
Ahhh God, that guy reminds me of a dickwad who asked me out not too long ago (I turned him down). Same age range and looks. Those little Napoleonic fuckers think they're hot stuff with their fake tans and dyed hair.
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"Are we pilgrims all of a sudden? ”
lmfao plecco!!! hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa
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"poor jacko, trying to struggle thru this world with one eye and the womenz just keep fucking his shit UP!" the lovely snowpiece 11/25/09
Holy shit Plecostomus
That is awesome!!! LOVE IT!!
~Madness as you know, Is like gravity. All it takes is a little push....