Tiger Woods Seriously Injured In Car Crash

An alleged love affair with Tiger Woods has made Rachel Uchitel the new Internet Celebrity. Most people who knew about the issue would probably search for Tiger Woods Mistress Pictures. This is confirmed proof that a lot of people need hobbies as they really are that bored, probably from watching professional golf. (I don’t mean to disparage the game, but that’s such a good joke that I’m going to keep it.) Then, to top it all off, he also had a car accident in his Escalade near his Florida home, and rumors abound of domestic distress. Obviously, people are willing to give payday loans to see the Tiger Woods accident photos.

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I think Tiger was on PAIN PILLS.. aka the good shit, when he ran away from his little 100 pound wife to avoid getting his ass BEAT. He hit a fire hydrant, AND a tree. According to TMZ, he admitted he was so 'confused' that he did not know his SUV was moving.. He drove under the influence.. bitch needs to get charged with DUI. And his wife gets extra coolness points for using a golf club on his pussy ass.. hahaha

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Submitted by Husbands_and_Wives on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 7:36pm.
His wife just happened to hear the crash and bring a golf club along to "free" him? I don't think so.
More like let's play wac-a-mole with a golf club on your face.

I hope he takes up a restful, non-athletic pursuit while recuperating. Like golf.

***********************************************
"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"

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His wife just happened to hear the crash and bring a golf club along to "free" him? I don't think so. I think the theory that they were arguing and that she was attacking him and then smashed the back window as he tried to leave in the SUV are true.

The charges that are pending are probably for her. Although I doubt he'll let her go down for this. Out of guilt for screwing whores he'll make sure nothing happens to her. DAMN this is crazy.

...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...

There's no way this was a planned distraction. Not with his wife smashing the back car window with a golf club! This story of rescue-by-golf-club is just too preposterous...a desperate attempt to explain away that which is painfully obvious. And now there is no doubt in my head that the previous story of Tiger cheating on his wife with that ugly whore is absolutely true...I hope Elin cleans him out.

They found him unconscious on the ground...with Elin hovering over him--they
made it sound like like Elin
had a hand with him being
in that state

nothing is perfect on this earth; if nothing else learn to laugh & have fun

Sheesh. For someone who is proud of being multiracial or Cablanasian or whatever, Tiger sure likes his women blond and and on the bimbo side.

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I just heard on the news that his wife smashed his car windows in and hit him in the face. good for her, getting back at that bastard... I mean, not that violence is the answer or anything.

Pathetic Humans- Prepare to write down the recipe!

http://www.tmz.com/2009/11/27/tiger-woods-fight-wife-crash-elin-nordegre...

I just read about his wife having a golf club "to help". Swedish Fish took it to that muthafucka hardcore. I wonder if there were any houses close enough to theirs to have the security cameras catch the action. She tried to bust his ass, and good for her.

__________________________________________________
I am not a pussy.

Submitted by freebird on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 4:54pm.

Swedish fists of fury upside yo face! Someone cried like a baby and couldn't see through the tears to drive safely to a hotel.

---
ah-hahah!

i ain't mad at anybody making that money, but i don't see the appeal of someone as angry as tiger woods...nor do i find his spouse that attractive either...
_____________________________________________
A new kitty lapping up milk trumps old pussy coughing up hair balls any day.

Swedish fists of fury upside yo face! Someone cried like a baby and couldn't see through the tears to drive safely to a hotel.

carefreea:

He always looks constipated to me.

So he is not giving mixed race children a good name.

His daughter might have gotten hit with the ugly tree at several angles!

***************************************

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Tigers looks don't matter. He's worth $600 million.

Submitted by TheBreakdown on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 4:09pm.

~~~

He's not cute himself so it's not that surprising the kid's a bit Rumer Willis like.

********
"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?

I said: "Just looked at a picture of Tiger's wife. She is not a good-looking woman...."

Provolone said: "...This is so not true...."

Provolone, the pic you provided was a Glamour Shot. Click on the thumbnail image at the bottom of the page CantStandBitches provided at 4:02 pm in this thread, and below here:

http://www.laineygossip.com/Tiger_Woods_car_accident_right_after_cheatin...

lol Breakdown.

Tiger's not exactly contributing much to the physical side of that gene pool to begin with. I think his daughter is cute, plus I've seen a lot of not-so-cute kids grow up to be gorgeous.

------------------------------------------------
Pearls of Wisdom from JJ - "If ass-holes could fly, you guys would be an airport"

The whole reason is to cause the media to decide on which story to focus on more.

Because we know for certain the crash happened. BUt the affair?

That can be argued about for months (like 9 if she's knocked up) and creates a diversion.

Like I said, this is PR work at its most devious.

***************************************

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@ Provolone

Wowsers, Provy!
Agree, his wife is drop-dead gorgeous.....

Duunn Dunn Dunn Dunnnnnnnnn.

This ain't my first rodeo, cowboy.

TheBreakdown-

That is some of the funniest shite I have ever read on here. Literally laughed out loud.

Thanks

Submitted by Frankiestage on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 4:16pm.
Just looked at a picture of Tiger's wife. She is not a good-looking woman.

This is so not true.

http://youbeenblinded.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/elin-woods.jpg

http://lh5.ggpht.com/fisherwy/R1vrG6zeTqI/AAAAAAAAL4w/rhPppT2El0g/elin-n...

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
"A man with crushed or cut-off testicles shall not enter into the assembly of the Lord"-Deuteronomy 23:1

I think that this crash story brings more attention to the affair scandal.

Before the accident people may have brushed off the star story (because it's star) and not taken it seriously. Now, after the accident, everybody is bringing up the alleged affair.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~
Girl Scouts - Maybe next time you'll buy the fucking cookies.

Just looked at a picture of Tiger's wife. She is not a good-looking woman. At least not a suitable-for-a-young-multimillionaire-soon-to-be-billionaire level of good looking.

Tiger was only driving 33mph?

Oh please.

Oksana would have been flooring that bitch, knocking back her third Long Island and flicking off the cops on a freeway chase covered on 'Cops'.

Tiger's a fuckin' nerd and cannot even manage a publicity stunt right.

EPIC FAIL.

He better start shopping for Elie's rock now cuz it's a coming.

And I just saw a pic of his daughter and I must say she is not that cute.

What good is fucking hot Swedish supermodels (ha! super my black ass) if you're not gonna get hot offspring?!

another..

EPIC FAIL.

***************************************

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"So now it's safe for you to make those jokes about how he must have been having text fellatio with his mistress whore right before he ran into that annoying fire hydrant."

I bet that is EXACTLY what happened.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~
Girl Scouts - Maybe next time you'll buy the fucking cookies.

CHIRIO! For real? Is Tiger a $cientology member? *shockyface*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

Conspiracy alright. went over to Natl Enquirer the page is down "Page unavailable/under construction"

REALLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY HMMMMMMMMM HMMMMM

LOL AT MK'S "IT'S SAFE FOR THE JOKES"

Coma Caca!!

Thanks, Rascal!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

@ Sugaroo

ROFLMAO !!! That Herpes Hilton prediction was pure brilliance!
Hahahahaha
*chokes on leftover turkey drumstick*

http://www.laineygossip.com/Tiger_Woods_car_accident_right_after_cheatin...

conspiracy!

The breakdown is definetly on to something

Tiger's PR people:

"OK, Tiger. So you're gonna have to pull a little DUI before shit hits the fan. Don't break any bones. Just fuck your face up a little. We gotta play the sympathy card here and we'll squash those affair rumors ASAP. Don't worry. Elie does not know about the money in the offshore accounts."

***************************************

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Alright, so he's got a few facial lacerations. So what. The worst outcome there is he becomes the Cablanasian version of Seal. I say put out this annoucement, T, sometime next week: "My wife and I are having some issues and have decided, for the time being, to seperate. Please reapect me and my family's privacy during this difficult time. And sorry about the fire hydrant and tree. I'll cover it." Then in six months, divorce the wife, give her her check, and move on.

@ Chirio

Hmmmm.... word! I suspect conspiracy.... ;-)

and...if I had all his money and his fame..I would have someone drive to wherever...and for my safety. what reason is there other than..he was kicked out or had a fight with his wife....at 2am ...come on. where were u going Tiger? to get some milk?

Coma Caca!!

He was on his way to check into the Days Inn after his wife saw that Enquirer story and went after his head with a frying pan.

Submitted by TheBreakdown on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 3:44pm.
You sluts need to put the pipe down and THINK.

How convenient this and his ho-ish ways both break the same day!

This is no coincidence.

I am telling you sluts...

His handlers told him to run into a tree to divert attention away from his skankin' it up on the side to protect his endorsements and not tip the scales on his pre-nup.

Because if his supermodel wife has any damn sense she probably has a clause in there that gives her more leverage room should he stray and play.

COVERUP!!

lurve it. and shit fuck, he seem so far up his ass to pull something like this. Nothing like protecting your money and your image, by looking like a dumbass crashing your car under 33pmh to a fire hydrant

Yahoo Sports did not factor in court costs and divorce payouts did they?

Because if she gets half, he'll never catch Oprah.

Not that he would anyway.

And I know I am on to something.

Christie Love is my mama!

His handlers are trying to protect the cash.

Always follow the money, sluts.

Tiger's tricks are!

***************************************

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I think Buick rigged the Cadillac because he was unfaithful to them by driving another brand after they pay him tons of $$$$$.

and how come they say "the suv hit"..no the driver did. arrrgh. so the it's car's fault. poor thing!

Coma Caca!!

Submitted by little_rascal on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 3:45pm.

Yahoo Sports is saying that Woods is on track to pass $1 billion by 2010

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Funny. Shanks News is saying that Paris Hilton is on track to pass one billion dicks by 2010. She's like McDonalds: Billions and billions served.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

Interesting..if the accident happened at 2:20sh am..why was it reported now.. hmmm hmmm!!!!

Coma Caca!!