This Was Bound To Happen

If Gerard Slutler and HoHan are in a room together, you better believe that STD-infused saliva bombs will fly in a quick minute. So it's no surprise that the two reportedly made the free clinic proud by tongue fucking each other at the opening of the Mazagan Beach Resort in Morocco on Halloween.

Shortly after The Mirror spotted the two making out, HoHan apparently told them (for some reason), “He’s hot, he’s mine! I’ve got no ring on my finger so I’m gonna have lots of fun. This is the most romantic place in the world after all.” A few beats later, the two jumped in a golf cart and rode off to exchange genital germs in the night. Totally romantic.

Both Gerard and HoHan will fuck a toilet if it winked at them, so this was going to happen sooner or later. I'm sure that when the toxic fumes cleared, they both cleaned off their fuck parts with a fire extinguisher and went back out to hunt for their next victim.

And how much do you want to bet that they both tried to pick each other up the next night not realizing that they got it on the night before? Such is the life of a true slut. It happens to all of us.

Posted by: Michael K

Submitted by Miramami on Tue, 11/03/2009 - 2:24pm.

Mira,I think Gerard Butler just lost the very little respectability he had by taking advantage of troubled Hohan for a pr opportunity/hookup. He is no actor because he's just as douchy in real life as the characters he plays in his movies. No acting required.

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Submitted by zinnia on Tue, 11/03/2009 - 1:05am.

From what I understand it is easier to name the women Gerard is NOT currently dating / shagging, than all the ones he's dating.....

__________________________________________
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."

Submitted by zinnia on Tue, 11/03/2009 - 12:56am.

"Submitted by Stoney

Sounds juicy. Am I supposed to say poor girl? I dunno, she is 23 actually , and not a teenager anymore. She has to take some responsibility herself. And stop blaming others for her failures. To start with she needs a new stylist!

But seriously she needs a detox.

__________________________________________
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."

Submitted by Plecostomus on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 10:39pm.

Submitted by kbcan on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 10:38pm.
How desperate is Butler if he is hooking up with Lindsay Lohan?

-----------------------

Maybe the gonorrhea's finally gone to his head.

==========================

Bottom-feeder.

Submitted by kbcan on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 10:38pm.

How desperate is Butler if he is hooking up with Lindsay Lohan? His reputation just took a MAJOR dive as a result of this -- if it is true. Hope it was worth it!! Because this is going to make him a laughing-stock in Hollywood.

Submitted by herpesfinder on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 9:40pm.

they may have herpes or something. You won't know this. Now 1 in 4 people have an STD, so it's nothing for them.
I found some stars prfile at herpesfinder.com

Submitted by Baby Rojo on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 9:40pm.

Gerry would fuck anything. I mean he clearly has no standards at all. The world's straightest man would turn gay in a heartbeat if they know they have to fuck Lindsay Lohan. Crap, this is the grossest thing ever...

And Lindsay, lay off the collagen please.

Submitted by Tristram on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:59pm.

Submitted by FarquharAmberschitz on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:56pm.
Bonnie Hunt announced on her show the other day that she and Gerry are dating.

Maybe when she's alone and closes her eyes.

___________________________
My Appetizer Platter at Quaker Steak and Lube! Onion Rings, Deep Fried Pretzels, Deep Fried Pickles, and Cheese Sticks

Submitted by FarquharAmberschitz on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:56pm.

Bonnie Hunt announced on her show the other day that she and Gerry are dating. I am confused.

Submitted by Grace Disful on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:45pm.

This, by the way, is the textbook definition of "Sport Fucking."

I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.

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Submitted by kokoskitten on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:27pm.

alright my bitch ass doesn't want to admit it...but lindsay looks ok here compared to recent death photos...

Submitted by Vico on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:16pm.

Anyone know when this pic of Hohan was taken? Her forehead looks all swollen and wrinkle free, Wasn't there a picture recently of her with massive forehead wrinkles? I dunno

........::::::00000000::::::.........

"So what was all that about enlarged holes and tight cracks?" -Enid

Submitted by Grace Disful on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 8:13pm.

The hottest I've ever seen Gerard was in Reign of Fire, which is also one of the worst movies I've ever seen. (In an incredibad sort of way).

I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.

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Submitted by letinstar on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 6:45pm.

so gerard doesn't care where he sticks it, eh? no surprises here...
_____________________________________________
A new kitty lapping up milk trumps old pussy coughing up hair balls any day.

Submitted by Tristram on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 6:04pm.

Submitted by Who Datt on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 6:01pm.
An honest mistake on Gerard's part. He was feeling homesick for Scotland and mistook her nasty vag for a bowl of haggis and fried Mars bars.

*loud snort at work*

Submitted by Who Datt on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 6:01pm.

An honest mistake on Gerard's part. He was feeling homesick for Scotland and mistook her nasty vag for a bowl of haggis and fried Mars bars.

Submitted by Manimal5 on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 5:34pm.

I wonder if he ran around with his porksword sticking out and yelling "I AM SPARTA"!!!

Submitted by putsomestankonit on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 4:32pm.

They were probably fighting over Lilo's last coke booger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm a black robot, motherfucker."

Submitted by imk505 on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 4:30pm.

not buying this one. they have falsely linked Gerald to other celebs one too many times.

Submitted by gnarlyone on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 4:23pm.

electrolysis pube makes a nice beard

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/

Submitted by BabyJane on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 2:53pm.

Gerard, the wedding is off! I was willing to overlook the Aniston skank, but this is too much! Give me my ring back! Don't EVER call me again. YOU ARE DEAD TO ME!!!

********************************************

I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.

Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 2:51pm.

*shrieks incomprehensible gibberish*

*Chloroxes eyes*

*hibernates until spring*

♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little dream of me

Submitted by Vermithrax on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 2:46pm.

Dude...

>_<

Submitted by TheBreakdown on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 2:17pm.

So Gerard Butler ıs one that hıts anythıng breathıng as well?

*fıles hım ın same folder as Colın Farrell*

***************************************

http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:

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Submitted by Seen around London on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 1:59pm.

Count down to Gerards peeps denials. Not saying he didn't fuck her but no way would he admit to this thing. Am I a dickhead asking why this old womans photos keep showing up everywhere? Do the Lohans really have so much $$ that they can keep paying photogs to take the photos and then pay websites like this one to post her picture?? She can't possibly be a person that photogs are stalking for the big bucks,right? Can someone please help my dumb mind understand this.

Submitted by Stoney on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 1:43pm.

I have been following the drama she's been having with her dad. She and Dina came out with a statement that Lindsay and Ali are getting restraining orders against him and that she no longer considers him her father. What's wrong, cunt? Don't like it when someone reveals your pathetic lifestyle to the press? Bitch, you ain't fooling anyone. We know you're a thieving junkie whore. Now Michael has said he's going to reveal the extent of her and Dina's problems to the press if Lindsay won't retract her statement. WEEEEEEE!!!! So much fun!

_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."

Submitted by belle on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 1:29pm.

Submitted by gia on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:39pm.

He is a total manwhore, but this time he has hit an all time low.

^^^agreed.

Submitted by Supertramp on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:57pm.

Lindsay used to be such a beautiful girl with her red hair and freckles. I thought she was going to be the next Ann Margaret.

Now she looks likes a panhandler or one of those burned out women that sells trinkets off the highway.

Submitted by Silvara0428 on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:52pm.

Misery loves company? Rock bottom is no fun alone?
Naw, not buying it yet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Take that with a silo of sarcasm" MK 10/21/09

Submitted by gia on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:39pm.

He is a total manwhore, but this time he has hit an all time low.

Submitted by IMUU on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:33pm.

LOL. He got away with it Scot free when jennifer phoned him at the hotel. Read it . http://bit.ly/3pB03w

Submitted by Stock Broker on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:21pm.

Raul Duke....LMAO! Then he yelled "BE FREE TROJAN"

_______________________________________________
"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone

Submitted by the Blinding on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:20pm.

Submitted by zinnia on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:14pm.
To answer my own question, YES Doug was trying to strangle her out of despair...:
http://thesuperficial.com/2009/11/doug_reinhardt_photographed_ch.php?bfm...

OR she's trying to pull a Rihanna.

that looked faker than Parasite's blue contacts. we aren't that lucky.

Submitted by zinnia on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 12:14pm.

To answer my own question, YES Doug was trying to strangle her out of despair...:
http://thesuperficial.com/2009/11/doug_reinhardt_photographed_ch.php?bfm...

OR she's trying to pull a Rihanna.

__________________________________________
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."

Submitted by Victor on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:57am.

For the first time in my life I am so jealous of LiLo.

Submitted by the Blinding on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:53am.

the Mirror are asses so I don't believe this. most places will provide pictures if they were on the scene. notice how they keep referring to Gerry as Jennifer Aniston's man and only have a picture of them together. sounds like a made up dig @ Jen.

Submitted by Melina on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:51am.

I think he's ugly and looks like a drunk. I really don't see where all this buzz about him comes from. If anybody gave me a stick, I still wouldn't touch him.

Submitted by Pearl_Necklace on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:48am.

So it's no surprise that the two reportedly made "the free clinic proud by tongue fucking each other at the opening of the Mazagan ..."

Read that as "at the opening of a magazine" -- cuz she would, you know, show up to the opening of a maga-- nevermind, carry on.

Submitted by zinnia on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:38am.

"Submitted by SpiceDong

speaking of Free Clinic and STDs, I am surprised MK has not posted about Parasite Hilton getting choked like a chicken by her boyfriend.."

Could you elaborate please? What's this about? Did he try to strangle her out of despair or what??What?

__________________________________________
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."

Submitted by cabbagehead on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:25am.

i don't believe any of this shit. if 2 idiots are in the same general area all of a sudden they're making out and doinking. bish, please.

Submitted by nono on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:24am.

Although I have lost my genital tingles for him after 300 (he has been looking scruffy and bloated as of late). This is really the last straw, now he has NO chance of tapping this ass.

Submitted by mike on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:22am.

If this is true, Gerard needs to be committed. That only thing worse would be if he hooked up with Paris.

Submitted by Flatbush Hooker... on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:21am.

Where the eff did rumors of him being a whore came from???

<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>
I doubt anyone would want to motorboat in Kim Kardashians bush garden
but no doubt some

Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 11:19am.

Please say this is a lie.

Submitted by carefreea on Mon, 11/02/2009 - 10:58am.

Mmm dry heaves, nice.

********
"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?