Someone Snatched All Of Kourtney Kardashian's Joo-Ree!
Kourtney Kardashian is the latest celebwhore to join The Bitch Got Robbed Club (along with LiLo and Ceiling Eyes). TMZ reports that the extremely pregnant Kourtney (no, unfortunately that's not just hot air) came home on Friday night to find that her Calabasas townhome was ransacked and the thieves got a hold of thousands of dollars worth of joo-ree including her boyfriend's $30,000 Cartier watch, a shit load of diamonds and a few pieces her father gave her.
Kourtney lives in a gated community, so police aren't sure how the joo-ree snatchers got in (SPOILER ALERT: They hid in Kim's ass crack).
The most valuable piece of jewelry I own is a half-eaten candy necklace from last Halloween, but if I owned a pile of shiny diamonds, I'd keep that shit under lock and key. Or I'd just keep them near a Kourtney Kardashian scarecrow that constantly babbles about her pregnant farts and how she wonders if amniotic fluid comes in scented flavors. That will keep any bitch out.
And whoever robbed Kourtney better watch out, because Khloe will pick up their scent and track them down in the dead of night! The thieves better keep a prenup and feminine hygiene spray close by.
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How would a person who works in a retail store that makes no money and is a front business for a fake reality show, and is on a show with no viewers make enough to buy a real Cartier? I say it's an insurance scam and she bought the fake-o watch on Canal Street.
She's just a mug 3rd rate player on her sister fat asses show, and a whiney pregnancy entraptor on another show. No way she had those jewels unless she Lohaned them, hey we aren't stupid Fatty!
Submitted by misfitwendy on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 11:21pm.
these monkey faced whores are famous why?
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monkey's are cuter cause they wear no makeup!
haha
if she's pregnant. im sober.
"Someone stole her jewelry? Good. I commend everyone who goes out there "robbing" from these useless pieces of human garbage. They should put a medal on these "thieves", cause it's not like any of these celebrities really deserved (or earned) what they got anyway." A FUCKIN MEN!!! *claps*
in the united states alone, about 4 million cats and dogs are euthanized each year for lack of homes to adopt them. YOU can help stop this.. spay or neuter your pet. please don't breed or buy while homeless animals die! and support animal shelters<3
these monkey faced whores are famous why?
"Joo-Ree" reminds me of an antic my best friend and I got up to in the early 80s. A synagogue near his apartment had a huge sign that said "Free Soviet Jewry." Both of us were so fucked by youth and idiocy that we though it said "Free Soviet Jewelry."
Good times.
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"You can't trust a ho as soon as they start covering their body parts with that Ed Hardy fuckery."
Submitted by CandyPerfumeGirl on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 9:33pm.
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I get what you're saying, but no, Kim doesn't deserve anything. Even I have sucked cock.
œœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœœ
"Well, Brian, this is a very nutritious lunch. All the food groups are represented. Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers?" "Uh, no. Mr. Johnson."
There comes a point where the tight clothing just isn't working for you, Mariah.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Have ANY of these whores ever heard of birth control?
Or sterilization?
"I never should have switched from scotch to martinis.."
I found a great dating site________ R i c h K i s s i n g. C O M ________. The best dating club for seeking the rich singles, sexy beauties. what's the most important is that you don't have to be a millionaire, but you can meet one. Charlie Sheen found his true love on that site in 2007.
I found a great dating site________ R i c h K i s s i n g. C O M ________. The best dating club for seeking the rich singles, sexy beauties. what's the most important is that you don't have to be a millionaire, but you can meet one. Charlie Sheen found his true love on that site in 2007.
These famewhores will do ANYTHING to keep their useless butts in the press.
Someone stole her jewelry? Good. I commend everyone who goes out there "robbing" from these useless pieces of human garbage. They should put a medal on these "thieves", cause it's not like any of these celebrities really deserved (or earned) what they got anyway.
Lindsey Lohan has wasted her looks and talent and career on drugs and booze and is a complete fuck up, and all Kim Kardashian does is walk on the red carpet and be photographed, sporting expensive outfits bought from daddy's trust fund. She got famous for sucking black cock on a tape that "accidentally" on purpose got out. She actually has more in common with Jenna Jameson than Hollywood.
But at least Kim looks good...Kourtney got knocked up cause she needed the publicity obviously. Why SHE is famous, i get even less. At least Kim had the courage to suck some serious cock on tape, Kourtney, on the other hand, has done absolutely nothing. It's utterly ridiculous that these people have "made" it. They belong shot on the spot.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
Yes, she looks good in this dress but is it just a good picture at a good angle? Or can you see dimples on the ass and upper thighs and her belly button bulging out at the front? Jersey knit and this nylon-y looking fabric is murder for pregnant women. I'd rather wear tents like they did back in the olden days. It's a time to be comfortable/cute not sexy/sleezy.
just another cheap ploy to keep this loser and her shit family in the news i'm sure. yawn.
in the united states alone, about 4 million cats and dogs are euthanized each year for lack of homes to adopt them. YOU can help stop this.. spay or neuter your pet. please don't breed or buy while homeless animals die! and support animal shelters<3
$30,000 watch and no safe? Makes sense...
--thanks awfully--
I didn't know these whores lived in Calabasas. My home town has truly gone to shit.
The Alien can't burst out of her innards because it's too ashamed to be associated with the famewhoring slug.
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Bottom-feeder.
I get it, seriously, nobody wants to wear the old fashioned muumuu maternity clothes, We get it, you wear it well, you look great pregnant, Hell, I was pregnant in the dark ages and wore spandex pants and fitted long shirts, but WHITE, A tight, white, mini-dress, Well she could have had a low cut v neck to add to this, so....but really when I can see the fetus and umbilical cord, can you spare me...
How did the Kardashian's escape the trailer park and convince people to throw money at them?
Seriously that's like a Jeff Foxworthy joke.
The tube top. It's good for both weddings and funerals
And it makes a damn fine skirt
She looks like a burnt sausage.
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"You can't trust a ho as soon as they start covering their body parts with that Ed Hardy fuckery."
She looks ALOT prettier with a few extra pounds. I always thought she was the ugly sister. She should keep some extra weight after the retard is birthed.
"I never should have switched from scotch to martinis.."
Hunny, if you have a look at some pregnant porn, you'll know better than to try to look like a sexy preggo, nawmsayin'? It ain't pretty.
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
The thief (?) was probably her BF. He stole his own watch to throw off the cops.
On another note, US magazine shows Disick wearing pink pants. PINK PANTS! What straight guy wears pink pants? He looks like a %$&*% fool.
zooie - verry funnneee, thanks! hurting yourself after taking a nap - i can relate.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I bet if you threw a pie tin in the air and screamed Roswell!, his dumb ass would come running. ~ Ford Prefect
TITS,
I'm watching Dana Carvey stand up on Hbo or maybe it is showtime. But anyways he is talking about how exercise should be functional. He is squating and standing and repeating, 'sit on the toilet and flush, sit on the toilet and flush, now stand, now sit, now sit on the toilet and flush'.
If I find a clip I have to post it because for some reason this is cracking me up.
TITS, go to 2:42 in this clip.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNAF1jHklNk&feature=related
Okay, everyone have a good day. Time to go wash the car.
Zoomie, this is why we get along - we're both easily amused!!!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I bet if you threw a pie tin in the air and screamed Roswell!, his dumb ass would come running. ~ Ford Prefect
"The most valuable piece of jewelry I own is a half-eaten candy necklace from last Halloween"
You're the King of One-Liners! :D
zomay's picture
Submitted by zomay on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 1:12pm.
Ah poor family, that's too bad.
Feeeeeeeeel sooooooo bad for her.
No but seriously, how the hell did this ho get robbed?!
She has no security system? No safe? No reality cameras filming 24/7? No security box at her local bank? Even I have a box at the bank. And I have no jewels.
*
You ARE a jewel. HEY maybe that's why they bury people in velvet boxes!
What? Where are you going? Set a while...
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I bet if you threw a pie tin in the air and screamed Roswell!, his dumb ass would come running. ~ Ford Prefect
@WWJDFAKB: I was thinking the same thing; she IS starting to look like Kim more for some reason...
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Remember, the early bird may catch the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese...
I'm with Pugzilla on THAT. This is some shit the BF perpetrated.
www.peopleofwalmart.com
Ah poor family, that's too bad.
Feeeeeeeeel sooooooo bad for her.
No but seriously, how the hell did this ho get robbed?!
She has no security system? No safe? No reality cameras filming 24/7? No security box at her local bank? Even I have a box at the bank. And I have no jewels.
Whatever bitchez..
Submitted by Stoney on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 11:12am.
"This bitch is so fucking stupid. She forgets her pill and gets knocked up with Captain McSleazy Pervertson's baby"
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Pffft. She didn't "forget". What a crock of shit.
My money is on the douche bag babydaddy with no visible means of support being involved.
LIE TELLER!
or
Good!
Depending on what's actually true.
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
Stupid sluts that don't have expensive vaults to protect their expensive joo-ree are dumb ass sluts.
that is all.
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
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I didn't even bother with reading this, Kourtney was probably hormonal and peeved over being overshadowed by Khloe lately...Don't know if the pregnancy did it, but her face looks different, the lips especially. All I can say is that she is looking more like Kim lately.
I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum..
kidnap? why shoot so low? kidnap usually means ransom..........I want the end.
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You've got a chemistry class - I want a piece of your mind
You don't know what you started when you mixed it up with mine
Are you ready for the final solution?
Submitted by freshfacestripper on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 11:40am.
(exhales bong hit)
"can someone kidnap her?"
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The visual of you doing and saying that. Hahahahaha!
This dumb bitch doesn't have a safe? Not even a fire safe? Serves her right then!
I have three safes, one of which is a fire safe and it also doubles as a staircase for my elderly cat to get on my bed. :)
(exhales bong hit)
"can someone kidnap her?"
j/k
Not buying it. Another Paris Hilton- type publicity stunt from an attention whore.
Definitely an insurance play.DENIED.
If I was their insurance claims adjuster, I would deny her ass. Soooo stupid.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
mike, that site is hilarious....
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You've got a chemistry class - I want a piece of your mind
You don't know what you started when you mixed it up with mine
Are you ready for the final solution?
publicity stunt- just like everything else they do.
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You've got a chemistry class - I want a piece of your mind
You don't know what you started when you mixed it up with mine
Are you ready for the final solution?
Just for laughs, be sure to check out her douchebag boyfriend/baby-daddy's web page:
http://scottdisick.com/
Anyone know if Lindsay Lohan had been seen in the immediate vicinity before the robbery?
This bitch is so fucking stupid. She forgets her pill and gets knocked up with Captain McSleazy Pervertson's baby, and now we find out she hasn't been keeping pounds of diamonds in a safe or safety deposit box? Wow. What a goddamn genius she is. _____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."