Friday, October 9th 2009
The Photoshop Awards: The Nine Hos On Vogue Magazine
Why does Nicole Kidman look like my ex-boyfriend dressed as Nancy Sinatra circa 1985 for Halloween? If Vogue was trying to make Nicole look like a ladydude, they could have at least added a dick bulge for the full effect. Actually, they should have used the "tidal wave" tool and Photoshopped her ass out of there along with Kate Hudson.
Even then, this cover is still all sorts of fug. Only Sophia Loren posing as a precious pearl in an oyster shell could have saved this.
With all that being said, sticking the text "It's Not Easy Being Green" near Kate Hudson's crotch area was kind of genius. Anna Wintour knows what's up with Kate's fuck life.
VIA The Fashion Spot
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Just when I thought Kidman couldn't get any fuglier she pops up looking like a cheap tranny hooker with a shitty wig on. How the hell does this thing still get work in films? She can't act,she can't move her face,she whispers all her lines,she has all the emotions of a block of wood,and all the warmth of a sub zero freezer. You would think the fame she got from pretending to fuck Tom Cruise would have expired by now.
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Photos could be better. Vogue just get more and more terrible as the years go by.
Someone in the movie biz please explain how Nicole Kidman is working? She was id'd as the most overpaid/lowest return on investment actor in Hollywood. I just went on IMDB and she has 9 projects in production. Her quote was $20M - is it still? Here's her filmography since Dead Calm
Australia (bomb), The Golden Compass (disappointment), Margot at the Wedding (flop), The Invasion (bomb) Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus (flop), Bewitched (bomb), The Interpreter (meh), Birth (flop), The Stepford Wives (bomb), Cold Mountain (meh), The Human Stain (bomb), Dogville (bomb), The Hours (meh), Birthday Girl (straight to video), The Others (OK), Moulin Rouge! (OK), Eyes Wide Shut (embarrassment), Practical Magic (flop), The Peacemaker (meh), The Leading Man (?), The Portrait of a Lady (flop), Batman Forever (embarrassment), To Die For (!), My Life (meh), Malice (OK), Far and Away(embarrassment), Billy Bathgate (meh),Flirting (?), Days of Thunder(embarrassment)
After a shit career that has cost the industry millions and millions and millions of dollars, with a face like a melted Barbie doll, she has NINE pictures in production!?!?!?! WTF!?!?!?! That's $180M if she still gets her quote. Does the Church of Scientology pay her salary directly or is it laundered through the studios first?
Mira, I'm with you Capitanne. She can not even move her face properly onscreen, so what the fuck is the bitch doing "acting"?
These women are just about as beat as "Vogue" is.
Vanity Fair is a total joke too.
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Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
That is a really bad wig that Nicole Kidman has on. When you include all the botox she has on her face, is anything real on her these days?
http://nicole-kidman-journey.blogspot.com/
Dear Vogue,
Nov Cover Issue reeks cut and paste like a muthafucka... Worst I've ever seen.
Dear Grace,
Tell Anna to fuck off and start your own mag.
The cover looks amateurish. Hoping Grace Coddington had nothing to do with it.
It would have been semi interesting if Tom's exes, Nicole and Penelope were next to each other.
Think Anna needs to get off of the "celebrities on covers" train at the next stop.
Love the dresses, though.
Penelope Cruz did sign a petition to free Roman Polanski ?? Yuk...a notch down for her.
I am not sure who the Marion chick is, but yes Nicole Kidman looks like Nancy Sinatra..Ha Ha...I like Penelope Cruz, but Nicole Kidman and Kate Hudson are slut bitches. Not sure who Marion is...??
Swear to ME!
Marion Cotillard owns the cover. It should only be her.
Amazing actress.
Please tell me they shot this cover at Six Flags!
I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.
Penelope Cruz is worth a thousand Kate Hudsons as far as acting goes... I would go to a movie starring Penelope, I don't go to movies when I see it is a Kate Hudson movie. I can't believe they are in a movie together... Penelope is trollin'
One of the worst Vogue covers I have seen. It clearly looks like each person took photos solo.
Jesus Christ, all the photoshop in the world can't erase the freakishness of Nicole's face and the skank off Kate Hudson.
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OH FUCK I JUST NOTICED KATE HUDSON WAS ON THIS. SHE'S A REAL PIECE OF GARBAGE. I'M WINCING. FUCK.
Four of the ugliest, most untalented people in show biz. That Cruz chicks nose almost touches her chin and her voice is so obnoxious. In exchange for pretending to screw Tommygirl she got a career. Hudson looks like a snake with those beady eyes. Old pothead. Kidman needs to lighten up and act again. She used to have talent but decided she needed to be sexy. Whatever.
Submitted by jim on Fri, 10/09/2009 - 12:02pm.
That you, Kanye?
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Now we are the crow which contemplated the silence...
Kidman looks like she's transforming into a werewolf. Her face looks crazy.
Submitted by femguide on Fri, 10/09/2009 - 3:54pm
Agreed.
As for the shitty cover, I'm surprised Wintour let it go to press. It's hideous.
I just don't give a fuck. period.ever.
fuck penelope cruz...she is one of those idiots who signed the free polanski petition. i'll never see one of her movies ever again.
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If I was a guy:
Kill, Date, Marry, Kill
In that order.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 10/09/2009 - 11:55am.
That second chick looks like she's releasing a tornado of pent up farts. Holy shit.
asjhdaksjhdas
hahahahahaha
STOP MAKING ME LAUGH AT WORK!!!
Andraya> I thought that's what it was. they didn't even TRY to make them look as though they were all there at the same time. Really crappy.
As Katie Holmes quoted from Tom Cruise: "that dress is wearing you".
That's this cover across the board. Tommy should have been the fashion consultant.
The dresses look better than the women wearing them.
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Haha, carefreea! ITA!
Peace.
Whoever Marion is.... they all look like plastic bitches on this cover. And Penelope Cruz has a bad case of witch nose, she's always boarding on the fug because of it.
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"I'm a black robot, motherfucker."
Nicole needs to lay off the Botox because her eyebrows and forehead are dropping so low, she's starting to look Neanderthal.
Nicole. Cod. Just stop.
She went blonde redpoint!! Not flattering.
Love Pene and Marion: though not the best pic, they are both fetching in my opinion.
Re: Submitted by Andraya on Fri, 10/09/2009 -
photo looks so weird ...weren't photographed together; like the actors took pictures of themselves in a mirror and then e-mailed them individually to the airbrusher dude.
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Nailed it.
Vogue is over. If they have to do photoshop because of costs at least they could get the best, This is incredibly low quality. They are not on location. Past her sell by date now that Wintour.
Is anyone old enough here to remember the large format, photogaphy by Richard Avedon? Models had their own style that came from them. Not like these hillbillies in costumes now.
Helena Bonham Carter still does her thing at least. Even when its insane I like it.
Penelope looks hot as usual but what have they done to Marion? That girl is gorgeous but here she looks like a special needs middle aged woman.
"I don't go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth!"
- Kathy Griffin
Any Vogue cover that doesn't have Victoria Beckham on it is fine by me, even if it photoshopped by the local clown college.
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I thought the one next to Nicole was Chloe Sevigny? Anyhoo the cover looks like they just grabbed any old photo off the floor and pasted it on.
Absolutely crap. All the $ spent on that shoot & these stars want everybody to be green. Hypocrites. Shove a DKNY sock in their gobs!
"Most people to me are like dog shit on the pavement, walk around it & if you come into contact w/it, erase all traces toot sweet."
Submitted by zomay on Fri, 10/09/2009 - 12:38pm.
That's all Vogue
could come up with?
Hell TITS or Sandbitch or Angel i could make a better picture.
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Or Plecto! There's not Plecto in there - that's their first mistake if they really wanna bring the glamour. LOL!
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Why do magazines even use Photoshop anymore? It's no secret when they use it and the actors should be embarassed. Do they honestly believe that we, the viewing public, think that this is how they really look? It looks ridiculous and everyone involved should be ashamed. God celebs make me ill with their narcissism.
I'm sorry, but they should have just put Penelope on the cover by herself. Maybe even with Marion. They are goddesses, especially compared to Kate Hudson and Nicole is past her prime...she went too far with the surgeries.
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LOL...they should have the words It's Not Easy Being Alex next to Kate.
Would be awright if Penelope wasn't on it.
I won't spend 5 cents on anything pertaining to do with her after her support of child rapist Polanski.
That's all Vogue could come up with?
Hell TITS or Sandbitch or Angel i could make a better picture.
Nicole looks clownish and scary with a reallyyyy bad wig. Marion Cotillard looks mildly retarded in the face, but I LOVE that dress. Kate looks like a smug annoying bitch, per usual, but at least she spared us all from having to see her fugly elephant ears. Of all four, Penny Cruz is the only one who doesn't looked photo-shopped to death.
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"All of us are lying in the gutter but some of us are looking up at the stars."-Oscar Wilde
It's not easy being green?? Ummm hello, for marijuana it is. how racist for lil leprechauns too. not cool.
Vogue should replace their name to: VAGUE
Coma Caca!!
Nicole looks like shit!
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I think this photo looks so weird becuz they weren't photographed together; these are just bodies superimposed. Looks cheap and rushed, guess this was a last minute deal. Looks like the actors took pictures of themselves in a mirror and then e-mailed them individually to the airbrusher dude.
Guerrilla gardeners take on the city??? Hope the Lohans dont see that. and good they didnt mention what city. Colombia coke will be gone forever! Now that would be a miracle.
Coma Caca!!
That is one horrid cover. They all look like they're on the rag and/or constipated.
Kate's squinty looks always annoyed me.