Girl Fight: Frances Bean's Advice To Ali Lohan
It seems that 17-year-old Frances Bean (daughter of Courtney Love & Kurt Cobain) has inherited her mother's skills for writing confusing rants about totally random subjects. For some reason, Frances went on her Twitter (her account has since been deleted) and typed out an open letter to 45-year-old Ali Lohan of all people. If we were all to write a joint open letter to Ali Lohan, it would consist of 6 words: YOU ARE SOME BENJAMIN BUTTON'S SHIT. But Frances Bean got a little deeper. We're going to need an Emo soundtrack for this one.
Before you start, you should know that Courtney Love doesn't believe in spell check in her household. Rant poetry should be raw. And we're off:
This is my open letter to Ali Lohan.Your not entitled to anything simply because your sister has a recognizable name. Your idea of fame isn't fame. It's infamy. You want to be famous? Work your ass off and make decisions that could potentially catapult your career into a lasting one. Notariety for who you are and notaritey for the work you produce are two completely differnt things. I understand that you have been brought up in an envirtoment where the idea of fame is easily achievable but, that's not an excuse. You lack the talent, social understanding and credibility to be anything other then infamous. Your careere choices, thus far, will transcend a future career as someone who attempted to be famous, but never quite achieved it. And if you do, it will be the formality of fame that puts you on the covers of tabloids, while the public idly watches you plumit into the murky abyss shared with the likes of Spencer Pratt & Jon Gosslin who, i'm sure, will steal your money whilst there. Fortunately for the world, there are people who have and don't have recognizable names, who have obtained artistic integrity and will one day, hopefully, bring that tangible artisticness into light again. Though, its hard to think thats achievable when people like You ali lohan are rendering the world of true talent by attempting to make your entitled ass noticed. How is this fair to the people who HAVE artistic integrity, or a mind? How is it fair to those who truly have something to offer the human race other then a dwindling last name and a few shitty films, both of which, solidified the idea that your just a celebrities sibling. I recognize that i might come across as harsh and no, i don't personally know you, but its the actions that you take, that speak for you. You blatently don't care how your recognized, its the objective to get famous and that is what makes you replaceable and a recycled idea .Well, im ashamed to have to be grouped into the same category of person as you. I would rather die a most painful death the be assoicated with the kind of careere your trying to make for your self. I hope i'm wrong because generally i'm not a very judgmental person, but in the case of you, that is MY entitlement.
I have to give to Frances for putting "Ali Lohan" and "artistic integrity" together, because my brain would have never ever gone to that place. And if it did, I'd have to disown it immediately.
I know I'm already on the Grammar & Spelling Nazis' most wanted list, but Frances Bean just jumped two places ahead of me. I'll see you in grammar prison, Frances! We can be bunk mates.
And if you're currently suffering from IRONY poisoning after reading this letter, just drink some milk and stay away from anything Courtney Love-related for a few hours.
P.S. - I'm patiently waiting for White Oprah's "open letter to Frances Bean," but I think she's still lying face first in a toilet from last night's debauchery, so let's give her a few.
VIA ONTD
ShareThis
You deserve a matchmaker to find love. At ___http://www.UniformedCupid.com__ your dedicated matchmaking online dating site for great dating services -- we believe that if you put yourself out there,
you'll meet singles you're looking for -- single men, single women, local singles, even a love match.
By taking a personal approach to personal ads, you can find a date and find singles for Military dating, Jewish dating, black dating, gay dating, or senior dating. With our matchmaking capabilities, you can find that unique person who gets what you're all about, quirks and all.
That person who says what you were about to say, who isn't mortified when you make a social blunder, whose scent you'd liketo bottle, and whose smile you'd like to wake up to every day. That's why we give you an audience filled with local singles, the tools to find and meet single women and single men,
and lots of features that help you find your love match. With Personals as your matchmaker, you can find the kind of first date that lead to second dates and beyond.
You still might meet the love of your life at a coffeehouse or gas station. But with __http://www.UniformedCupid.com__, instead of sitting around waiting for that to happen, you'll be getting dates from online dating and having a fabulous time.
Everyone's talking shit on Frances Bean...remember, that bitch could have been in our faces a THOUSAND times more than she is now. She's not really in the public eye. If she wanted to famewhore based on who her parents are, she could have been a tabloid fixture starting years ago.
And the people who think Courtney Love killed Kurt Cobain...what the fuck ever. It's ridiculous. Even if she did, OH FUCKING WELL. Kurt Cobain was an overrated piece of shit. The only tragedy is that Courtney didn't die with him.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
It's basically about how Ali Lohan rides her family's coattails for fame.
I don't know whether she's "riding" anything or whether her psychotic stage-peddling mother is actually forcing her into the business.
Ali Lohan doesn't really bother me that much.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Now we are the crow which contemplated the silence...
What brought this "open Letter" rant about?
Somebody clue me in and/or give me the Cliff's Notes here. The Lohan Clan I don't follow, but I'd always wondered how the Cobain's kid would fare after Kurt's death. I sincerely hope she's got more than just her mother as a *role model* in her life.
No kid deserves to have to live with THAT.
___________________________________
www.peopleofwalmart.com
Oh. Twerbose lets you post on Twitter much more than 140 characters.
____________________
One study showed that lap dancers get bigger tips at the time of the month when they are most fertile.
well i totally agree with what she says
i personally liked the letter, someone needed to tell that ho off
**AL][**
She looks exactly like her ugly and evil mother, and has the same crazy eyes, it's like a carbon copy of Courtney Love, and her rant is ignorant, and very Courtney Love, whoever said that she was grounded is a fool. She is showing to be just as ignorant and crazy as her mother. No one cares about you honey, go sit down somewhere.
Mira, Frances and that mother of hers suffer from self importance disease.
Normally I would say this emo-twat could go ram her head down a used toilet, but I found this rant amusing. Anyone who shreds Ali Lohan is alright in my book!
This reminds me of the "Family Guy" episode in which one of the reference jokes posits a world in which Kurt Cobain cleaned up and did not commit suicide, and shows him introducing Courtney to someone. "And you know my wife, Courtney Love," and the other person says, "...Who?"
***************
Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull
I saw pics of her smoking like nothing on the street but its not like I didnt expect any better since her mom is courtney but if she gets media attention for this rant and they start following her like they do with this train wrecks and she messes up I'll be laughing,Maybe shes doing the same shit but is less noticable...
Wonder why she deleted her twitter,maybe hacked?
I don't know beans about Frances, but beside the point that her grammar and spelling stink and she has benefited from being the child of famous people, I love it!
She is right, Ali has said she wants to be famous just like Lindsay. Not that she wants to act, not that she wants to sing, but that she wants to be famous, period.
Looking at Lindsay now, I wonder if she has the sense to reconsider that remark.
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
I'm not really that smart, it's just that everyone else is so damn stupid!
Pfft, not like Rolling Stone is a half decent magazine anyway. Even had she "earned" it, I still wouldn't be impressed.
Rolling Stone makes for good toilet paper.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Sugar is sweet,
Lemons are sour,
Get on your back,
And give me an hour.
Submitted by alice on Wed, 10/07/2009 - 8:45pm.
Myntee: you Avi is amazing. Love that cat!
Whoops-I mean "your Avi" with my spelling I should get an internship at Rolling Stone!!
Myntee: you Avi is amazing. Love that cat!
Huh?? Was she a grade school drop out? What she wrote doesn't make a bit of sense.
It's pretty rich that someone who got an internship at a magazine because of their famous relative (obviously not for their grammar and spelling skills) is telling someone else not to do the same thing.
http://blog.vh1.com/2008-07-21/frances-bean-cobain-rolling-stone-intern/
While most 16 year olds are flipping burgers, working hard at school perfecting their writing, and only DREAMING of an internship of that calibre, Frances swoops down with her "your"s (instead of "you're") and "Notariety"'s (instead of Notoriety).
She should thank her lucky stars her parents are famous...
gosh knows i love kurt cobain, but i fear this one will turn out just like her mother. hey frances, you can lump your mother in the same category as ali lohan. your mother wouldn't have a recognizable name had it not been for your father, & she has milked that for all it's worth. had it not been for your father & billy corgen, she would not have had 1 single successful album, as they wrote them for her. your mother is the leech of all name dropping, social climbing leeches. & your mother is linked to 3 deaths. ali isn't linked to anyone's death yet (that i know of), nor is her sister. your mother on the other hand....loathsome & probably the most feared person in hollyweird, literally.
---------------------------------------------------
http://www.myspace.com/naervana
Submitted by Myntee on Wed, 10/07/2009 - 6:36pm
I don't know about Meghan Fox, but that whole lip thing, I have the same lips as her, they always look like you're pouting, it's annoying and unintentional.
Is it me or does frances look like she's trying to emulate megan fox? She just needs to open her mouth a bit more and she's got it perfect
i am in danger of being crushed to death under the weight of the irony............a bit of self loathing and denial squeezing it self out perhaps?
gawd she is soooo...........um teenagery. yuk they should be locked up untill they're 21 or something so no one needs to hear or read their shit.
- <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 -
I think mastication means to chew your own penis...
If this is true and she did write this she doesn't really have room to talk.
Both are famous because of others. As far as I know Francis hasn't really done anything. I think I heard she got a job at Rolling Stone but really what do you expect, her mother's Court, her dad's Kurt and her godfathers are Billy Corigan and Michael Stipe. I doubt she got the job on her incredible spelling skills.
She doesn't play music, she isn't an artist, she does what exactly?
team bean.
...
but, then again, what do i know?
There's something fishy about this, I read Frances's twitter and she knows how to spell 'maintain' and 'career'. She's a really smart girl so I dunno what happened here.
kitties <3
Team Frances bean, not because i give a fuck about her, I'm just again 45 years old Aliana.
....But that’s vulgar and gross to me: exploding assholes, exploding brains. And Christian sites are vulgar to me, too. Michael K
Oh, who the fuck cares? I can't stand either one of these little twats.
On one side of the argument, you have Ali Lohan who is another trainwreck in training, and pulling for the other side, you have Frances Bean Cobain who I lost all respect for when she hosted a suicide themed birthday party. Patronizing emo douche. Yeah, suicide's real fucking cool.
Poor Frances Bean Cobain. Her mommy is a bloodsucking thief and potentially murdered her father, but that gives her just as much of a right to behave the way she does as does Ali Lohan, whose mommy is a fame-whoring thief.
I think I actually dislike Frances Bean more, to be honest.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Sugar is sweet,
Lemons are sour,
Get on your back,
And give me an hour.
Ha!
I like Ms. Bean... she nails that overdone 40-something wannabe to the wall. The spelling errors of a 17 year old just add to the reality, and hardly detract from her message, which is solid...
Consider that this is the perspective of a girl who was born into public scrutiny, regardless of how she manages her life. How could the (then) infant daughter of one of the most famous rock suicides NOT receive public attention?
Ms. Bean knows the price of fame.
i think frances is quite pretty - no way for her not to be, with the eyes, really. i am rather disappointed that she has painted a pair of lips that dont actually exist on her face.
********************
The McCanns Did It
Ummm, I call Bullshit.
Doesn't Twitter have a 140-character posting limit? If someone's going to write that much shit, surely they'll care about the delivery.
All I heard was blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, pft!
Physician, heal thyself.
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
PS.. The originality of this tweet may be suspect only because it reads like the dialogue from "Dawson's Creek".. Damn those kids/writers were smart!
I prefer "Labia Lickin' Lady" over his obnoxious shouts of "Hot LEZZZZZBIAN Love!"
Miss Malevolent, I swear I was about to say something along those lines
-----
Proud love child of Oprah Winfrey & Bill Gates
That shit was POET-TREE!!!! Although i wish it could've been addressed to Hohan, but this will do.
I prefer "Labia Lickin' Lady" over his obnoxious shouts of "Hot LEZZZZZBIAN Love!"
Ali's been doing some lip-plumping? Anyway, she is so much more interesting to me than Lindsay.
Both of these poor little girls have asswipes for mothers. They both are living off the name of a famous relative so Francis is the pot calling the kettle.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 10/07/2009 - 12:29pm.
OMG where? MUST.SEE.
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
While it is peculiar that she would choose Ali Lohan of all people to go off on I can absolutely agree with the sentiment. Although you gotta know that she has benefited from nepotism herself.
Still, team Frances.
Frances has her father's eyes and her mother's (original) face.
IMO so don't start throwing big ass words at me.
Francis has raised and continues to take care of her Mom. Couldn't it just be that Francis identifies with Ali, and wants to be one single voice of reason in a circle of fuckers who entitle the blohan sisters?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
yes, there have been pics of her smoking with Lilo.
**********************************************
You tried to hide your lies, disguise yourself
Through living in denial
- Christina Aguilera
PSL - yep.
I wonder, has Ali started smoking yet?
Cigarettes that is.
M.E., next comes the "finger in the mouth" pose.
**********************************************
You tried to hide your lies, disguise yourself
Through living in denial
- Christina Aguilera
I see Ali has started using the constant "pursed" lips.
UGH! DIE!
Frances used to look like Tina Yothers... glad that phase is almost over. No one aspires to that.
Hideous spelling and grammar aside, I think I like Frances Bean, if only for using the word "whilst". Seems like she's pretty intelligent, w. a good head on her shoulders, even if she can't spell.
The your/you're thing KILLS ME.
If her mom is dyslexic, though? Things like that tend to be genetic. i.e. - we are pretty sure my dad is dyslexic and I can't spell for shit! You can tell me how to spell a word a million times, but I won't remember the next time I go to spell it. I also mix up p,b,d, w, and m sometimes.
I love the way that Ali carries around the decoy bottle of water like her sis does. As if anyone believes she's leading a clean life.
You gotta wonder what she'll do if Daddy Lohan really does come around trying to get Blohan cleaned up. She'll probably tell him to leave sis alone -- after all, Ali is nothing but her sister's famewhore shadow.
She's just so unremarkable and not worthy of any sort of fame. Whatsoever.
These pics are the best I've ever seen these two fools looking... Beanie Baby looks like a porcelain doll, and MiniLiLo only looks about 32...
--------------------------------------------------
If Mackenzie Phillips doesn’t have a house full of cats, then you can’t possibly have a good reason to either.
Frances Bean got her a nose job.
i'll give it to beaner though - at least she's not out working the fame-whore-stroll. but she should have sent this letter to her mother and replaced "celebrities sibling" with "deceased celebrity's widow".
*puts on helmet*
*licks window*
HUH?