Good Morning Beautiful

And GOODNIGHT! This picture of Lindsay Lohan out in Paris last night can be used for a variety of purposes. If you've got a problem with critters digging up your garden, simply place this picture near your plants and they will never ever return again. In fact, they might suffer cardiac arrest, so you'll have meat for dinner! And if your kids have been messing with the wrong stuff, just show them this picture and they will immediately check themselves into the nearest nunnery. Shit, I don't even have a booze problem (fuck the first step) and this picture might force me to go to rehab and devote my life to Jesus. ~~SCARED STRAIGHT!~~ JUST PLAIN SCARED!

But on a serious note, I feel for SamRo. The poor thing's crotch area is probably cold, because her labia lips have been stuck to HoHan's face for the past few weeks. That's very selfish of HoHan.

Speaking of disturbing fuckery, here's 15-year-old Ali Lohan looking like she just slipped out of the exhaust pipe on the Rock of Love Bus.

Well, at least she's appropriately dressed to work the ho stroll now. Why isn't White Oprah in jail?

Splash

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 10/07/2009 - 1:05pm.

Can you just imagine waking up to that?

♥ Threadkilla!
Chaka Khan wrote me a theme song!!!

Submitted by LALALALOVE on Wed, 10/07/2009 - 1:04pm.

Why didn't I comment on my sexy bitch Lindsay before???
What a sex bomb. Wooo--hoooooo!

ParisHilton: "Huge"

Submitted by allwilson on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 2:48am.

The absolute BEST line of this was "(fuck the first step)"...wow...I was hysterical

Submitted by tapgirl on Sun, 10/04/2009 - 11:09pm.

More meth face, have there been ANY good pics of her lately....why are we still seeing her???
Oh right, cos it definitely makes us feel better about ourselves.
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"I don't have a problem with anger, Dale, I have a problem with idiots"...Hank Hill

Submitted by Chubb on Sat, 10/03/2009 - 11:10pm.

Just so sad

Submitted by Grace Disful on Sat, 10/03/2009 - 6:10am.

I haven't seen a dress like Ali's since the last Klymaxx video.

The outfit Lindsay is wearing looks like something an elderly woman from the Upper East Side would wear to a performance at Lincoln Center.

And Lindsay has one Bette Davis eye . . . and one normal eye.

I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.

Submitted by skidmarx on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:57pm.

Lindsay's family and friends will never tell her that she needs to get help because she's still the one who brings in the money.

Come at me bitch!

Submitted by bornagainChristian on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:46pm.

At the speed these two are going...

they are going to be middle-aged by twenty five.

they already look like they have more mileage on them than their mother.

not pretty.

Submitted by julesinSD on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 9:51pm.

Congrats Dina,

Both of your daughters are directionless - working in Hollywood w/ sleezy people who have sucked the soul out of your oldest - now your setting up #2 to have her bones picked dry too - by the age of 20. Dina, how about you suggest community college and a good program for children from divorced homes? Lindsay? An utter mess who ruined herself. So sad.

Submitted by Myntee on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 8:05pm.

Also i am soooo glad i have sons cos i would be in jail right now for beating the stupid ho out of my daughters if they bahaved like this.

- <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 -
I think mastication means to chew your own penis...

Submitted by Myntee on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 8:03pm.

Poor Ali, why doesnt she take a look at her sister and get the fuck of that train to pamela andersonville. Seriosly. Pam is 40 and Linsay looks worse.
Maybe she's trying to make to most of the time she has left before she starts to look this ruined?
There is nothing wrong with being pale!!! Look at dita von teese HAWT and cate blanchett, she's such a goddess. i'm part Italian and pretty tanned naturally but ppl like lindsay is what makes me always put sunscreen at least on my face. white is a whole lot better than skin cancer.

- <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 - <3 -
I think mastication means to chew your own penis...

Submitted by lelu on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 7:15pm.

Rachel Zoe looks younger than she does.

Submitted by Frost on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 6:38pm.

My aunt looks like that. Except she's like...54.

I think my mother and her family would stage a formal ass-beating/intervention if I looked like Lindsay Lohan now, in spite of being two years older than her.

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Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are you you gonna bite?

Submitted by kikichanelconspiracy on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 6:07pm.

"Submitted by I love Rob Zombie on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 9:32am.

I know I'm going to sound like an asshole here, but I'm beginning to feel a little sorry for this human train wreck.

****

OK, this term gets thrown around a LOT when it shouldn't but in this case it applies perfectly: borderline personality. Her parents are NOT going to do much to help b/c they played a verrry large role in how she got that way. Combine this kind of disorder w/ $$$, fame and access? Girl's in major trouble.

***
First and foremost, off-topic, but I am also completely hot for Rob Zombie. Rrowr! Now that's been addressed, I also feel sorry for LL. Her parents are such colossal fuck-ups that the poor kid never really had a chance. She was their little cash cow and they led her right to the slaughter. I hope she turns her life around, but let's be real: we'll all be shocked if the kid makes it to 30.

"Perky, I'm also 34 and I was thinking the same thing, we look better and younger than these hos!"

Holla to my fellow 34 year olds! I would also be horrified if I look this. Like LiLo, I'm a pale-faced Irish-American. However, i had the stereotypical ballbusting Boston Irish-Catholic mother who took no lip and ran a damn tight ship (those military wives, I tell ya). My mother laid out the facts of pale skin in her very unique way when I was 13.

Me: *attempting to sunbathe*
My mom: *suspicious, said with a thick Southie accent* are you wearing sunblock?
Me: No, Mah! I want to try to get a tan.
My mom: *whips a bottle of 45 spf while closing in* Jesus Mary and Joseph! You kids aren't Italian! Put on the goddamned sunblock! You'll thank me when you get older!

Me 2009: Thanks Mom. You were right.
_________
I wish it was like the 70's and it was still ok to kick someone's ass. Damn

Submitted by Sookie on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 6:04pm.

shes making BAD choices and its her own fault...just like the rest of the rich, talentless, fucktards in hollywood....i know it sounds harsh but im speaking from personal experience...she really needs to help herself, spend whatever money she has left on getting sober and AWAY from her leeching family and fake ass friends....all that being said, thats one FUCKED up picture of her...DAYUM!
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"This is straight up fuckery."
His Holiness MK, 9/03/08

Submitted by squiggles on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 5:07pm.

Submitted by I love Rob Zombie on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 9:32am.

I know I'm going to sound like an asshole here, but I'm beginning to feel a little sorry for this human train wreck.

****

Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 4:52pm.

She looks like Lil Cuyler, actually.

http://static.tvguide.com/MediaBin/Galleries/Shows/S_Z/Sq_Sz/Squidbillie...

♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣

Sugar is sweet,
Lemons are sour,
Get on your back,
And give me an hour.

Submitted by suzanita on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 4:39pm.

its bruce bitch...

ok, before I got to the rest of the face, from hairline to eyebrows this bitch looks exactly like Pam Anderson who is what? like 20 years older?? Can that be a good thing??

Submitted by Talkdirty2me on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 4:24pm.

Ok, this girl needs a real friend to tell her a few home truths. First off, that self tanner is doing her NO favors. It is seeping into her wrinkles and making them more pronounced. She is fair skinned and should embrace it. Look at Scarlett Johannsen. She has gorgeous pale skin. Lindsay's hair color needs to be red as well. Don't fight what god gave ya! She needs to eat a freaking burger as well. She has some of the best breasts in Hollywood when she has some meat on her bones. Remember when she looked like this?
http://cullrich.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/lindsay-lohan-bikini-hq.jpg
Seems like Many moons and many coke and booze binges ago for Lohan.

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"If you're going through hell, keep going" ~ Winston Churchill

Submitted by i am a sloth on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 3:50pm.

holy shit---both her and ali look like SHIT! how can they notice how bad they look?

Submitted by Whatever on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 3:41pm.

Submitted by KD on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 10:54am.
So does her SevenNine product that she did with Sephora have one of the skull and crossbones symbols on it?

LMAO! I think Sephora will drop the product after they see this pic!

Submitted by Whatever on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 3:39pm.

MK please post a warning before putting such a giant picture of that old messy granny. White Oprah must be smoking crack along with lindsay to let her underage daughter out of the house looking like that. Shame on her!

Submitted by Mrs.TimDaly on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 3:37pm.

Good luck with your concert at the London Palladium Ms. Garland!

Submitted by fauve on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 2:35pm.

Submitted by anony54321 on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:57am.

You and I are exactly the same age, and I have no wrinkles and swear I look younger than she does. If that face were staring back at me in the mirror now, let alone at 23, I'd be horrified.

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"It's like I'm gently being butt fucked by a croissant." -MK

Submitted by nono on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 1:56pm.

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:09am.
we can beat on them all we want, but Hohan's in paris having a ball
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A person can be miserable in a fucking bed of roses in the finest hotels, they are still miserable. She can go buy/whatever she wants, she can't escape herself. She obviously has issues or else she wouldn't look like that. She looks ROUGH. I think most people who like their lives are happy wherever they are because it is a state of mind.

I hope it is not too late for her sis, but at that age, hearing/reading the stuff people say about her, that had to fuck her up even more.

Submitted by bomp on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 1:53pm.

Submitted by BabyJane on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 1:39pm.
Get it right people! That's not a meth or junkie face. It's alcohol bloat and sun damage.

_____________________

Yeah, agreed. Sun and alcohol is what does this. She's naturally very fair and she's done a fuck load of damage for someone so young so if she wants to sort it out, she'd better start now. And it's like it's one bad photo - every pic there speaks of a serious fucking business. I can't help but laugh, anyway.

Submitted by BabyJane on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 1:39pm.

Get it right people! That's not a meth or junkie face. It's alcohol bloat and sun damage. She looks like the homeless woman living in a tent by the river. And the poor little sis, she's just a little girl out there twisting in the wind. I hope someone pulls her in before she crashes and burns. She still has a chance. Lindsay is a lost cause.

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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.

Submitted by letinstar on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:43pm.

gah! these tricks look so friggin harsh...if my high school math serves me correctly, i'm twice the age of lilo and almost triple the age of ali and i don't look this rough...
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she was clumsy, stupid and mean, but I wouldn't wish that death on a opossum...

Submitted by oldpossum on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:22pm.

I don't know why in the fuck anyone liked her when she was remotely FUCKING NORMAL?

still want to hit that guys????????????????

Why is this whore still alive? I predict dead in December of too many drugs.

Submitted by easyaspie2 on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:22pm.

If they can keep Ali off the pipe and pole she will grow up to be a beautiful woman. She has good bones. Very Greek looking.

Submitted by kokoskitten on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:14pm.

alright.... i kinda feel sorry for her...i mean she pissed away three rehabs that most of us could NEVER afford...but she and EVERYONE around her has got to know there are some substance abuse problems...when i had to move back in with my parents years ago and they found out i was drinking 3-4 times a week they pulled the tough love shit, changed the locks, went through my room etc (uuugh) and i was in my early 20's (don't remind me)...i mean they were on my ass if they thought i was drunk...where the fuck are her parents ? her money has got to be almost gone....

Submitted by CeeCee on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:11pm.

That's not "meth face" MK, that's "hydrocodone face".

Submitted by BangoSkank on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:08pm.

That looks exactly like the dress the "managers" of the "night clubs" wear in Bangkok.

And no, while I was there, no one loved me long time. Or even short time for that matter...

But I did see a chick shoot a dart out of her cooter and pop a balloon from across the room.... A skill I am sure Ali will eventually pick up herself.

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:06pm.

Lot lizzard.

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHA!

Submitted by Andraya on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:02pm.

Perky, I'm also 34 and I was thinking the same thing, we look better and younger than these hos!

Submitted by angel_i on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 12:01pm.

LOL@Ali tryna squish her fake boobies flat. She gave herself an extra one.

♥ Threadkilla!
LEAVE LADY GAGA ALOOOOOOOONE!(part 2)

Submitted by anony54321 on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:57am.

i am 43, 44 in december, and so help me i have fewer wrinkles than that girl.

damned shame.

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The McCanns Did It

Submitted by louise_brooks on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:56am.

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:09am.

we can beat on them all we want, but Hohan's in paris having a ball and we're all stuck at our stupid jobs wasting time online. FUCK EVERYTHING
````

A junkie in Paris is still a junkie.

I'll stick to my stupid job and my pointless online activity in the boring midwest any day over a raging drug addiction played out in the media.

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:44am.

Who lets their 14 year old daughter dress like that?

Submitted by Silvara0428 on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:38am.

Lindsey the lot lizard needs to be forcibly removed from the planet, and that poor girl needs a Mom.

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Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:37am.

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:09am.
we can beat on them all we want, but Hohan's in paris having a ball
****

You mean an 8-ball, right? Oh, totally enviable.

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What's the exchange rate on me giving less than a rat's ass? - TV

Submitted by VitaminF on Fri, 10/02/2009 - 11:36am.

All the abuse she has caused her body is showing on her face. that said, i really like her outfit. I would love to dress up like that for a night out in town. Ali is just plain horrifying. Complete loss of innocence at 15. The dress on Ali is perfect for a Ho stroll, as MK pointed out. Where is their mother?