Crazy Bitch Of The Day!
Usually when you have a fight with your common-law husband, you hit him over the head with a frying pan, shank him in the neck with an ice-pick or call his mother to tell her that you caught him jacking off to her picture in the bathroom. You know, you get your revenge the normal way. Well, some crazy ho in Texas went way too far when she decided to pull a Fatal Attraction on her common-law husband's goldfish.
USA Today says that the police in Pasadena, TX were called to a home by a man claiming his wife fried up their goldfish and ate 'em up after an argument. When they arrived, they found a plate with four fried goldfish on it. The crazy bitch admitted that she ate 3. And you know there was a tiny fried fin hanging out of her mouth when she confessed to it.
The man said they had an argument after he took back some joo-ree he bought for her. When he refused to give it back to her after she begged, she grabbed the fish out of their bowl and made herself a snack fit for a lunatic.
After the police gave the woman a "Are you a fucking cat?" side-eye, they told the couple it was civil matter they had to work out themselves. No charges were filed.
Obviously, the man needs to get back at her by frying her joo-ree and swallowing that up. And at least the two didn't have any pet bunnies or puppies.......
(Thanks Larissa)
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It sounds like she punished herself more than him. Who the hell wants to eat goldfish?
LMAO@telling his mother he's jerking off to her picture. Classic revenge prank, and I'm definitely going to use that one day. THANK YOU! We need more stories like these!!
smack.doodle.glib.
Oh come on. It's just a fish. Nobody here eats sushi?
What happened to the old-fashioned methods of revenge like throwing the guy's clothes out the window? Or keying his car?
Ok frying them up is one form of crazy but EATING THEM?!?!? That crossed the line!
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www.myspace.com/Dreamkilla26
Submitted by nickysix on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 10:37pm.
hahaha this is totally like similar to the incident...
Ate the goldfish did she; hope she had some tartar suace.
I would eat all of mrsouls Viagras. ;>
This chick totally got the idea from "The Man With Two Brains"!!
Skip ahead to the 2:15 mark - this scene completely freaked me out as a kid.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t2tJcx-Jcgo&feature=related
Submitted by Jeepster on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 3:16pm.
Hey -
I actually used Goldfish Crackers in a recipe for home-made Mac and Cheese.....jesus it was good!!! Put the Goldfish on the top and put the casserole dish under the broiler for a few minutes - Goldfish half melted with crispy bits on top.......unbelieveably tasty!!!!
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You're probably the type that makes Kitty Litter Cake for dessert.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 8:15pm.
YIKEEES!!!...fair enough..still goldfish are no different to me that any other Flounder fin fish in the big blue sea..not that I eat fish but still I somehow can't feel the emotional difference people here showcase..With that been said I never set foot to the fish market...all these horrifying mutilated disgusting dead slime creatures around...
That's uncool. Those were his pets. I hope he does something truly evil to her in retaliation.
Submitted by Dgrin on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 8:12pm.
Nope, I have never eaten lobster. Reason #1,254 for not going into Walmart is because they cage them there. I just can't handle seeing them with their claws tied up......*cries*
Submitted by anony54321 on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 6:54pm.
Yes, honey, the real ones. I know, I'm still shocked and will probably be scarred for life for seeing this!
*kisses fishtank*
meanwhile when they fry those poor lobsters alive I don't hear any of you finger-licking bitches complaining...just sayin'...
i was trying to figure out what 'joo-ree' was(foreigner here) hell I even googled it but all I had to do was read it in a jewish accent...
WTF is wrong with people, people?
Shame they weren't some poisonous variety that rendered the bitch dead.
How stupid..he was taking back the jewelry, why did she leave one for him, she should have eaten all 4.
oh wait - you mean real goldfish? bc i was picturing the crackers in the bag.
wait, she fried and ate his real goldfish?
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The McCanns Did It
WTF?! Couldn't you have cut up his clothes or something? Why take it out on an innocent being that had to suffer horribly because of what you did?!
Man, I don't understand people. And I hope you die with shit in your mouth and ammonia up your nose.
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Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 2:53pm.
ha ha once I flushed my ex bf's frog down the toilet when he stayed out all night.
IM STILL SOWWY, ROMEO!!!!!!!!
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What, no tartar sauce? Now THAT'S a crime.
There's not much meat on a goldfish. Just saying....
(Snark aside, abusing and/or killing a pet out of revenge against a significant other is EVIL.)
Are you serious, she fried them and ate 3? *cries* I love my fish, and although they just think I'm some random bitch throwing in food I treat them very well.
This is fucked up.
Goldfish are great but hard to fillet.
What the fuck did the goldfish do to this loon? If she wanted her joo ree back, she should have heated up the frying pan and beat the husband's ass with it until he coughed up the goods. Poor fish.
"Jesus and God really need to file a joint lawsuit against bitches for dragging their good names into unadulterated fuckery!" MK 2/15/09
Shit's getting out of hand.
only in texas!!!
you're welcome. oh btw i grew up in pasadena.
What a stupid idiot. He should shove a shark up her ass.
what a savage.
puurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr,
moosh
http://www.twolia.com/blogs/teacups-and-couture/
O no! She didn't eat the sea kittens!!!
What is this world coming to?!?
♥ Threadkilla!
LEAVE LADY GAGA ALOOOOOOOONE!(part 2)
what a CUNT! (#font=1,000,000#)
when SHE looks at some biatch the wrong way i hope she gets tasered, maced and pepper sprayed, her arseflaps turned inside out, her tits fried in batter and her eyeballs poked in. she deserves nothing less, the ugly fucking fish-hating CUNT!
------------------(my signature)
tell it to my answering machine
Um, when I was 19 my boyfriend, his friends and I spent the night playing drinking games, and some where along the lines got bored because during a game of Asshole, the middle cup kept getting filled with goldfish (real fish) and we'd have to shoot it.
Mine came back up, still alive.
thanks Smurfy xoxo
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Tupac is about to get into a grave, so he can roll over.. MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
That is my favorite snack.. um.. the Pepperidge Farm Variety. They are for me like Cheetos are to Britney.
"Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 3:23pm.
sorry Papa Smurf, my only defense was I was drunk off my ass
*cries*"
Awww, all is forgiven. We do crazy things when we are drunk. I mean, I once asked a Mexican who didn't speak any English for his number at Home Depot once. True Story. Just don't let it happen again, K? *hugsies* :D
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
I live in Pasadena and THAT'S the kind of shit that gets us on the AP Wire???
We haven't had this much excitement since our very own serial killer in '73 and the filming of Urban Cowboy in '80.
Someone get me out of here!
>Submitted by Total Randomness on Wed, 09/30/2009 - 3:10pm.
Sorry, but I think this fucking hilarious!
Word Up!
You can only please me with a dick made out of chocolate that ejaculates money.
wow! that's revenge!
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Imagine if it had been hamsters.
Poor fishy.
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"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone
eh, better than what I did to my husband's cat.
As my dad used to say, "People done lost they damn minds!"
noooo! WAAAAAAANDAAAAAAAA!
...
but, then again, what do i know?
Everything's bigger in Texas, especially the crazies.
That's the hilarious mental picture of the day...a pissed off Texan with a fried goldfish fin sticking out of her mouth. Thanks, Dlisted. Thanks awfully.
Graduate of the Joan Crawford School of BITCH.
What MK doesn't say is that the fishies were swimming in a big bowl of Natty Ice before they got cooked up. Beer-battered goldfish. Gross. Wouldn't she have choked on their little bones?
you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop - Patches O'Houlihan
Eww, that lady is messed up to fry up dude's pets... *dry heaves*
Also disgusting, my friend once ate a goldfish whole on a dare from her brother (she was 7.) Talk about a cruel death for the fishy.
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"All of us are lying in the gutter but some of us are looking up at the stars."-Oscar Wilde
o hey i live there. Sidenote, one of my baby sharks just died this morning, i aint lettin that crazy ho know that, my fishys dying with dignity
sorry Papa Smurf, my only defense was I was drunk off my ass
*cries*
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Tupac is about to get into a grave, so he can roll over.. MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
DON'T TAKE YOUR ANGER OUT ON ANIMALS.
Jesus. This shit is sad. I'm going to go cry now.
Poor fishies!
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
Hope she got a bad case of The Ick.
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Let me be your Salty Dog
Or I won't be your man at all
Honey let me be your Salty Dog.
LOL Bossy, oh yeah Romeo was the frog.
Do you think he still might be alive down there, growing bigger by the year and waiting to get his revenge on me one day when I 'm taking a pee.....YIKES!!!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Tupac is about to get into a grave, so he can roll over.. MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton