Open Post: Hosted By Mayor Eric Brewer
There's an ESCANDALO brewing over in East Cleveland after sessy pictures of Mayor Eric Brewer poppin' that ass in women's lingerie were shown on a local news station just days before the primary election. Mayor Eric would not confirm or deny if the hot piece in the wig is him or not. However, Mayor Eric did accuse his opponent of leaking the pictures in a last-minute attempt to sway voters. Well, guess what? I'm about to sway my ass over to East Cleveland to find a way to cast a vote for Mayor Eric!
The three things I look for in a mayor are:
1. Someone who has conquered the art of posing doggy-style for their Craigslist ad.
2. Someone who knows the importance of color coordinating their fuck-me-pumps with their lingerie.
3. Someone who is the star of a good ole' cross-dressing SCANDAL!
Mayor Eric has all three! Therefore, Mayor Erica, you have my vote girl!
VIA Buzzfeed
• 
xxyxz - yes.
I think Jack would pull an MK and break the calculator ... ;)
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat
Anyhow, the funny part was she said something and I stopped, looked at her and said "did you just say DONUTS?" I swear I thought she said donuts and I was like wtf kinda shit is that...
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mmmmm...donuts! Hey, maybe she had some kind of Homer Simpson fetish. With every stroke, you should've said, "D'Oh!" really loud. She might've been into it.
The Comedian can talk her ass off too. Fortunately, she's funny as hell though. Her observation skills are supernatural. She notices shit that I just totally miss. The only downside is that as a guy, I can't keep talking like that. I have like 2 or 3 hours of conversation in me. Afterwards, I have to engage in something primal, meaning that I must either fuck or kill something.
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You make me tickticktickticktick...-YYY
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M.E.
Don't you hate it when that happens?
I wonder how many will be in Stoney's litter?
WHat kind of dog are we talking about?
Hey Stoney, you do know that you can get knocked up by another dog while already inseminated right?
*reports self again*
The ho calculator yesterday got me thinking and made me remember that when I was 21 I fucked a 16 year old.
HE TOLD ME HE WAS 19!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*calls cops on self*
Worst part, I still see him around town, he knows BH, they've riden together and BH has NO IDEA!
*reports self again*
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:58pm.
*blinks*
Stoney, when did you start jacking off dogs?
*reports stoney to SPCA*
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Shhhh.... M.E., when talking about this you have to use her professional name: Stacy.
Submitted by snowpiece on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:56pm.
OMG Stoney!
I hope you're not pregnant now!?!?!?!
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I was just about to say...
*blinks*
Stoney, when did you start jacking off dogs?
*reports stoney to SPCA*
lil_ras - there was absolutley no way in hell I could even attempt that thing.... no way. I'm lucky to remember names, places and if there were any noticable birth defects... no way I can remember even approx ages.... THEY WERE ALL LEGAL!!! 'sept when I was underage!
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:55pm.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. NICE.
that is seriously really gross. And I thought that my best friend's dog peeing on my foot every time he sees me was disgusting...*shudders*
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
ROTFLMAO @ jazzy!!!!
*dies*
I DIDN'T TOUCH THE WEINER.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
*saying ever single cuss word out there*
Fucking BH has it Fucking MADE!
*jumps off cliff*
OMG Stoney!
I hope you're not pregnant now!?!?!?!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Tupac is about to get into a grave, so he can roll over.. MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
That really was her name....!!
Stoney, that is seriously nasty... especially the "pink part" LMAO
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Jack, did you do that slut calculator Nichael K had yesterday? Ummmm... what was your score?
Stoney will have to add one more sexual encounter to the total # now that she made dog cum.
Who got the dogs off...ugh...ugh, ugh, ugh-ugh!
Who got the dogs off...ugh...ugh, ugh, ugh-ugh!
Stacey is a bullshit name. Total bullshit.
*reports self*
So I just walked back in and all my coworkers were like, "um, please don't make the dog cum again" and "well, you are his exact size" and "maybe he has a thing for blondes?"
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:50pm.
MJT - it was Stacy. *sticks tongue out*
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More likely her name was Krispy Kreme.
s0o0o0o nebody gonna see that tucker max film this wknd???
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I don't need SEX life FUCKS me whenever it can!
@ jack - riiiiiiiiiight. ;)
im bored..
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
MJT - it was Stacy. *sticks tongue out*
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:44pm.
Yes, ladies and gentleman. I made a dog cum.
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There's really no where to go from here.
*quits life*
LOL lil_ras... I have no idea... LOL!!
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:47pm.
sluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. wait, can you remember her name? I bet you can't! ;)
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
Submitted by Master Blaster on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:38pm.
I was havin sessy times with this chick once and she was a TALKER!! Fuckin mumblin all kinds a shit... I was so damn busy trying to figure out what she was saying I forgot what the fuck I was even doin... Anyhow, the funny part was she said something and I stopped, looked at her and said "did you just say DONUTS?" I swear I thought she said donuts and I was like wtf kinda shit is that... anyhow, she cracked up laughin... I was done. Please go now.
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Stoney, you are adorable!
Big Ole Miss fan. Sister goes there.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
@ Jack-in-the-hat
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Hey Jack, what's going on between you and Snowpiece?
"Jack,still?"
Ok, so my other coworker just brought in her HUMONGOUS Wolf German Shepherd mix. I walked into her office and the dog got so excited IT CAME A LITTLE ON THE CARPET.
Yes, ladies and gentleman. I made a dog cum.
*hides from the pink part*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:41pm.
Stoney! Are you an Ole Miss fan!? I lurrrrrrrrrrve me some Jevean Sneed. I feel sorry for him really, I heard he had the flu.
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:39pm.
BAMA! Nice, that will be a great game. My GF was a professor at Bama...so I grew up a fan. We play UT-El Paso..LAME.
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
LOL ♥ you lil ras!
And South Carolina can go fuck itself. Fucking intercepting buttholes.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Master Blaster on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:38pm.
YAY, MB that's great! :) Funny is always hot.
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:36pm.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:34pm.
No, I work with your mom, remember?! The one who can't breathe busy of my afternoon poos! That fat ole bat!
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ummmmmmm, i'm gon tellllllll...
MJT - roll tide... BAMA!!!!
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Stoney, you can always bring in a Watchtower magazine and ask to talk to her about Jesus. Of course, if she's interested, then you're fucked.
@ xxyxz
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Soney also had biological clock, and she got angry because it was giving her a hard time and she threw it away.
Now I have it and it works just fine.
I love Stoney!!!
Submitted by little_rascal on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:36pm
*steals one from little_rascal*
I'd like to give a big shoutout to Dlisted.
I have another date tonight with this woman who is comedian. She is intensely funny. At various moments, she, literally, has me doubled over with laughter. If it weren't for the fact that I get to exercise and develop my snark skills on a regularly basis, there would be no way I'd be able to keep up with this person.
Hopefully, there won't be any jokes during sexy times because that would kind of hurt my ego, I think.
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You make me tickticktickticktick...-YYY
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I too am a bitch and hate being talked to about shit that has nothing to do with my life, just so someone can hear themselves talking.
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:35pm
I know... I'm just fucking with you...
I have nothing better to do right now.
and all I have to look forward to is going to lunch
@ McDonalds *sigh*
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:34pm.
No, I work with your mom, remember?! The one who can't breathe because of my afternoon poos! That fat ole bat!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
I was really shocked last week when the guy across the hall wondered over and yapped for 5 minutes about construction and traffic and the best way to get home and I kept wondering what it had to do with me, and then he walked away before I could figure it out. Then, as the day progressed, I heard him have the same conversation with 2 or 3 other people. I suppose I should feel flattered that he now considers my opinion, or at least attention, to be valid. I hope it doesn't happen often, though.
@ Jack - who do yall play this weekend?
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I feel I'm on top again baby that's got everything to do with you...
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 1:34pm
no matter what you say.. I'm still not your wife!
stoney- can you wear headphones? i mean, even if you dont have anything to plug them into.. just wear them and point to them when she starts to talk to you and mouth "i cant hear you"
..if that doesnt work, yeah decapitation is your only alternative- I agree.
*
just click this fucking link
LOL, I know, I'm a bitch. I just don't like it when she bothers me when I'm trying to dlist! Can't she see I'm busy?!
*passes out garden gnomes*
G-N-O-M-E-S
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
@ xxyxz
................
Stoney HAD garden knomes. Then she hurled them.
Finders keepers.
"No I don't like it when you walk into a room and forget what you were going to do."
I did not know you worked with my wife...
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Submitted by mike on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 12:20pm.
I didn't know that East Cleveland was a separate city.
mike, it's a separate WORLD. east cleveland is the asshole of the whole cleveland area. you know those news stories of 100+ year old homes that are in ok condition being sold for $10? that's in east cleveland. there are no jobs. no police. no schools. it's hell. it's the "ghetto-est" area of cleveland outside of hough (look up the hough riots). i've lived in a cleveland suburb my whole life and steer clear of east cleveland at ALL costs.
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"Your HR lady is a cunt." -Chris Ecclestons ConcubineSubmitted by mike on Fri, 09/25/2009 - 12:20pm.