King Henry VIII Was Not That Big Of A Slut
Jonathan Rhys Meyers, who plays King Henry VIII on The Tudors, says that Henry was not really the mega manwhore everyone thinks he was. According to JRM, you can get fucky with at least 20 people before you're considered a ho fo sho.
He explained, “In The Tudors I’ve only slept with like 22 people. In The Tudors I’ve only slept with like 22 people,” he said. “Which is not bad because if I go out in London on a Saturday night and I say to some handsome young dude or some handsome young girl that’s standing in the club: ‘How many people have you slept with this year’? ‘Er about 50′. So it’s not so much. Henry was much more prudish in history than we portray him in The Tudors. But sex happened and sex was very much a matter of state then."
I'll co-sign everything JRM said. Back then, you spent your days stabbing bitches, eating turkey legs (I've been to Medieval Times) and sexing on hos, so 22 people is nothing. Shit, even today 22 dicks is considered pilgrim-ish. Hardcore sluts go through 22 different genitals in one week! If you're Parasite Hilton, your Venus Peen Snatch swallows up 22 wangs while walking down the block.
And let's not get into telling each other how many sex partners we've had. It's just a number! Besides, I don't think the type of math needed to figure out that number has been invented yet.
VIA Showbiz Spy
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This man is so talented.There could be great things in his future if only he would go to rehab and stay there...
Sorry, sluts, but some of you are being a little Cheetoling-ish here. JRM has obviously researched his subject because David Starkey, who is probably the most renowned contemporary Tudor scholar, says that Henry was a bit of a prude. And Dave's done the work. So to hell with what y'all saw on TV, cos TV's not real, y'know?
how to calculate your SQ.
Slut Quotient:
take your total tail-tale tally, divide that by the number you COULD have slept with, and then that number by the number you HAVE slept with.
Feel like a slut now, slut?
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Henry's festering thigh sores may have started off as jousting wounds but by his stinking, rotting end were undoubtedly dripping with syphilis.
Newly arrived (from the New World and brought back to Europe on Columbus's ships - which proceeded to turn the Genoa harbour area into a rancid heap of trepanema-consumed carcasses) syphilis was a much more virulent infection back in those good olde days, occasioning much general bodily (and brain) pus and putrescence.
I've got my TI-30x IIs scientific calculator whores, start throwing your man numbers out there...
Submitted by kokoskitten on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 11:53am.
ughhh...thinking back to late 20's (and unfortunatly it wasn't that long ago--i'm 31)...i definetly had a "phase"...after i found out bf was cheating and we broke up i went wild...i met husband as a one night stand...SORRY TMI...
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I had the same situation! Almost exactly! Weird.... I was about half to 'ho fo sho' status beforehand, and then wore out my membership card, had to get a new one and got it laminated for easier cleaning.
"Small and broken..... but still good..... mostly...."
King Henry had sex only with three women beside his wives. Mary Boleyn, Elizabeth "Bessie" Blount and Lady Elizabeth Fitzwalter.
Henry VIII was the only British king to have more wives than mistresses.
Anyone else remember that episode in Will and Grace where Grace and her boyfriend Woody Harrelson count sexual partners and how many times they had sex and he's had far fewer partners but tons more sex than Grace? That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
This guy is not appealing at all. love him in the tutors though.
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"Honey, i am more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you'll ever get"
Carwash 1976
Submitted by dementa on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 1:17pm.
And just how slutty do you have to be to be a slut? If someone is sluttier than you, does that mean you're incapable of being a slut unless you outdo them?
That is one darn good point. Reminds me of the cheating curve concept in "Sex and the City". "That someone's definition of what constitutes cheating is in direct proportion to how much they themselves want to cheat." Substitute sex and slut for the cheating terms and you get the picture. What does that say about JRM then eh? lol
LOL Stoney & Dementa:
Henry was like a lot of folks today: "Entitled and in Denial".
"a wife-killing, mutton-leg eating, animal-abusing asshole".
Today he'd be right at home with Michael Vick and OJ!!!
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
Jeepster, they'd charge his K-FedUp ass with animal cruelty today.
lol a Budweiser Clydesdale! He probably spent a shitload of money having the largest horses possible shipped to him. He'd retire them after he broke their backs. *cries*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
so more than twenty makes you a slut?
" hiding in corner, counting fast."
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Never wear anything that panics the cat.
P. J. O'Rourke
Big deal. I know more than 50 people who had sex last year.
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Stefie Shock: Je combats le spleen
hahahahha Sluttz! ten hours later I am LMAO at his ister doesn't count!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
Dementa -
I read that too - Henry had to be hoisted onto his horse - he was that chunked-up...(musta been in K-Fed Territory....)
Stoney - what the hell kinda horse could hold Henry - a Budweiser Clydesdale?
LOL
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
he's so hot.... until he opened his mouth.
puurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr,
moosh
http://www.twolia.com/blogs/teacups-and-couture/
PUHLEEZ. Does he think his wacky-ass TV show somehow reflects the reality of Tudor-era England?
Nobody kept detailed records of how many fucky-times Henry had, partly because they were scared of him. And partly it was because it was taken for granted that he'd be humping his wives, his mistresses, their attractive relatives, the chambermaids, etc. That's what kings DID. He slept with his fucking second wife's SISTER, for crying out loud. Ew.
And just how slutty do you have to be to be a slut? If someone is sluttier than you, does that mean you're incapable of being a slut unless you outdo them?
Re: his weight, I read somewherethat in his declining years, Henry 8 had to be hoisted onto his poor horse with a lil homemade CRANE.
Stoney -
thanks for the tip - I LURVE this historical shit!!! What a soap opera - these bitches were HOT (and no Twittering!!!!)
Yeah - Catherine of Aragon was the best of the bunch - she really got the shiv!
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
I watch The Tudors from time to time. It's entertaining, but highly inaccurate in almost every respect -- beginning with hair styles. Many women in the show wear their hair loose, but that was highly unusual in Tudor England.
Also, King Henry, Anne Boleyn and Jane Seymour looked **nothing** like their counterparts on the show. In fact, they were all rather ugly. We know that because there are many portraits of them.
One is the loneliest number of them all.
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why does my fucking computer have to be on welfare?
Triscuit. 09/02/09
Slutty behavior doesn't count once you cross the border.
http://dottypinhole.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/jonathanrhysmeyers.jpg
Even though it's one, it amounts to 22 to me, hahahaha
I'm a believer in one being the magic number. But that's me, I realize everyone else has different personalities and varying expectations on sex, what it means to them, and what role it has in their lives.
Fuck, my blood sugar must be low, because JRM is looking hotter and more doable the more I look at his picture!
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Live Your Life Like Brian Kinney Said:
No Excuses, No Apologies, No Regrets.
Submitted by Jeepster on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:30pm.
In the book she has two kids with him and then flees to a country house while Anne gets her queen on. Phillipe Gregory who wrote the book actually does a shitload of research to make her books historically accurate. You should read it, and follow up with The Boleyn Inheritance. The Constant Princess about Katherin of Aragon was the best one, though. That bitch went through major hell.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Stoney -
Rumor was that Henry actually had a son with Anne's sister Mary, but I think the boy died (or was murdered) before anything could come of it. (I got this from the movie "The Other Boleyn Girl" - good flick - not too sure of the accuracy though....
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
Stoney -
oh - right right right..."the smell" Yes - I remember now - last couple of wives were pretty much nursemaids...
gross
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
It's great, deb!
*hands you half my sammie*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Jeepster on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:17pm.
Yeah, sounds right. The wound never healed, and apparently his last few wives were disgusted by its smell.
*vomits*
He couldn't move very well because of it, so he ended up just lying around getting fatter and sicker.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
OHAI, Stoney!
How is the Magical Kingdom of Bints?
**sticks toe in water**
**thinks what a bunch of cold cunts**
**thinks about bologna sammies**
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08
Desire chip from AA...................01/17/09
One month chip........................02/17/09
Two month chip........................03/27/09
Still sober...
Plus, back then it was customary for powerful men to take on lovers while their wives were pregnant. Considering both Katherine and Anne were knocked up several times as well as Jane once, the number just shoots up from there. Plus, didn't he have a couple babies with Anne's sister, too?
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Stoney -
He got the leg wound right before be-heading Anne Boleyn - right? Then it lasted through wife 3rd through wife 6?
so - it probably never healed properly, and finally gave him blood-posioning? (this sounds right, but I am fuzzy on details)
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
Jack N The Hat -
Don't worry - at the beginning of this summer my number was a sad little "two" too. Rest assured that your symptoms can be cured in 70 days or less. Be sure to drink plenty of Corona and if you need to, take your clothes off. Good luck.
Dear old King Henry VIII was a manslut and a rich bratty king who was dumb enough not to know what he wanted. He was such a spoiled little bitch. I can't remember how he died but I do remember reading he got a nasty wound from those typical knight competitions. A slut is a slut, not matter what time and age said slut is living in.
Rhys Meyers here is just stupid and his brains are batter from being a dumb junkie.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA jack is a GAY.
*points*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
I love that he asks "handsome young dudes how many people they've slept with this year" like JRM loves the cock.
you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop - Patches O'Houlihan
Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:10pm.
Let's just say there were a lot more than 22, if the stories of his orgies are correct.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 11:59am.
How does anyone living know for sure how prudish Henry was or wasn't? Anyone who spoke ill of him faced imprisonment, torture, or death; at a minimum, ruin. So no one disclosed it or kept records.
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You big dummy, he would text message people.
jack
you looked dint you?
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:07pm.
Oh. How did his numbers compare to what JRM said?
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Stefie Shock: Je combats le spleen
Submitted by Migraine Sally on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:09pm.
OWNED
OWNED and
OWNED
Will you dumb horz ever learn???
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yea, what dipshits.
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"I HAVE NO MORE GOTTDAMN CUPCAKES!" 08.18.09 The delicate flower that is Mrs. Bradiful Bitch
HAI DEB!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
You promised me naked Depp and changed the link.
I am not stoooopid...----->jack
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why does my fucking computer have to be on welfare?
Triscuit. 09/02/09
ok so what is the magic number that takes someone from comparison "shopping" territory into Slutsville?
As Carrie Bradshaw once said, if you are reasonably attractive and refuse to settle for the first few that come along, at some point you'll rack up in numbers. Does that make you a slut? (or something along those lines).
I think NOT!
It burrrrrrrns!!!! - Miss Coco Peru
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKNZICoKSdA
Submitted by Jeepster on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:06pm.
He got the joust wound right before he killed Anne and married Jane Seymore. He was still youngish then.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
OWNED
OWNED and
OWNED
Will you dumb horz ever learn???
Tristram, there is a world of information available about the history of The Tudors, and especially Henry VIII. He couldn't find and kill EVERYONE who hated him.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Migraine Sally on Fri, 09/04/2009 - 12:06pm.
You so bad!