This Is Hypnotizing
I don't know if it's the music from a 1980s cult orientation video or the fat lumpy winking asses, but this video has got me completely mesmerized. I think I might be winkmatized! Anyway, let me snap out of it! This is a video for a revolutionary (not really) pair of pants that makes your ass wink, quack or click.
Somewhere in the world, Kim Kardashian is pfft-ing at this, because you know her ass can already wink, quack, do Morose Code, catch a football from 100 yards away and sing the Star Spangled Banner on key. Bitch's ass is smarter than her.
Not only will Winkers make you look like a complete ass (and make your ass look like an ass), but it will also keep skeezers away! If your nalgas are just so tantalizing that creepers keep grabbing it without permission, slip on a pair of Winkers and you'll never have that problem again! They will be so confused, scared and creeped out that they will run the other way! Or they will be completely hypnotized by your winking butt cheeks that you can get them to do whatever you want. They will be putty in your ass!
VIA The Frisky
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I had to come back cuz this almost made me late for work this morning. I, too, was mesmerized! It was the music, kinda....it made me just want to look at those crazy winking asses for fear I might miss some amazing event - like their shrinking something might pop out or some shit...I don't even know - I was just entranced....AMAZING!!!1!!!1!
♥ Threadkilla!
BritPics
Gotta love the pants the little porker is wearing
Surely they could have found some one with a better ass to model those pants.
It's some fat, toneless, flat assed ho.
I was thinking, you know who would wear these pants, the type of person who would have the crazy frog ring tone on thier 2 year old 2 Nokia who sits at the bus stop and goes thru what they think are awsome ring tones, just so every one knows.
You know the type.
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I think mastication means to chew your own penis...
i fucking cried
my sides HUUUUURT, my face HUUUUUUURTS
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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"This is straight up fuckery."
His Holiness MK, 9/03/08
those owl pants are the business!
I can't believe that anyone thought this was a good idea.
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Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull
I hear there's a male version called: "Wankers"
Fat asses, drawing attention to their fat asses. Yep, sure, that'll sell some Winkers fast. Well, maybe at the local trailer park community sale.
Why would he get models with fat and flat asses to model those jeans?
That is not going to make anyone want a pair.
The Paris Hilton version will be called "Wonkers".
Before ordering your pair, please consider the fact that the winking effect only works on XXXL people.
Pure awesomeness!
I expect some low rent hos to be wearing these soon. Maybe a Lohan or Simpson, a certain Spears or some reality "star". Perhaps the human urinal, Kim K will don these soon, since the ho loves attention to her ass.
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* trying to figure out of to get my third leg invovled to pull off 3 wolves howling pants *
lol wtf
Coma Caca!!
You know where we will see these next, don't you? On the ass of fashionista Debbie Rowe.
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And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?
hilarious MK
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Proud love child of Oprah Winfrey & Bill Gates
Man.. I thought I've seen it all.
Pair those pants with the amazing Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt and the sexiness of that outfit will have George Clooney creaming in his pants.
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Bitch, Don't You Ever!
...and if you get certain pairs, you can sit on your own face!!
Submitted by joe shmoe on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 9:09am.
Submitted by NitWitty on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:45am.
I wonder if they made cross eyed winkies if it'd make the model's ass appear slimmer? Perhaps cataract eyes?
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hahaha...don't be dissing cataracts, Nits. Some of the most discerning old gents have them ;)
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Nah..I can't hate either, if it weren't for guys having crossed eyes or cataracts I'd never get a date.
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Are You A Goddess? If so...
The action pants look hongray.
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"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
Submitted by NitWitty on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:45am.
I wonder if they made cross eyed winkies if it'd make the model's ass appear slimmer? Perhaps cataract eyes?
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hahaha...don't be dissing cataracts, Nits. Some of the most discerning old gents have them ;)
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Une seule vie
LMFAO!!!!!! My favorites are the "Action" stunners. Dayum! I would have worn this shit the first day of Jr. high back in '82! lolololol
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
If you fart while you walk the ducks sound like they're quacking.
“I’d come down and give you a hug, but I lost my pants!”
You know what, I am having the worst day of all bad days and it's only 10 o' clock. This mess made me chuckle. So thanks!
My pants have been doing this for years. My nalga dimples look just like eyes.
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Crazy/Forever
What would happen if you had a shapely ass and you RAN in them? It would cause seizures like those Japanese wideo games!
*seizes*
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Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful -- Seneca
this is a joke, right? these are not for real, right?
I wonder if they made cross eyed winkies if it'd make the model's ass appear slimmer? Perhaps cataract eyes?
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Are You A Goddess? If so...
If they had these with eagle eyes or beaks they would be the perfect accompaniment for the Three Wolf Tee.
Lobster or crab claws would be hilarious on a ripe woman.
Hey guys, would you like to date a cougar? Or are you a cougar yourself? Okay, no matter you are looking for an NSA, FWB or serious relationship. You'll want to check this out:**== Matchcougar-c O m ==**It's where cougars and younger men can meet(Cougar is the slang for woman who is mature, experienced and want to date a younger man).
Must. Get. Owl. Pants.
*muses on how to get fat, lumpy, ass*
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Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful -- Seneca
I already have an eye back there that winks.
I have to get the owl - the mascot of my alma mater.
Random winking may also occur if you don't wear panties. So I've heard.
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Une seule vie
Submitted by justice on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:32am.
They chose some interestingly shaped people to advertise this nonsense.
LMAO, I want the ducks!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
"Morose Code"!! MK!!!!!!
Surely that's what Miseralba's vagine does!?!?
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Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful -- Seneca
I am totally winkmatized. I want the pair with the bird (just before the owl) with all the brown smears everywhere that look like shit stains. That's just how I roll.
Submitted by ewlulu on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:32am.
Ohhhh, what happens if you walked by an angry sort of dog and made direct eye contact!!!!!
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Huh, maybe that’s the point…they’re actually a weight loss tool designed to make you run…
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Monty Python and the Holy Grail
What in one-eyed waddling hell is this shit?! Was this filmed on the quad of a mental institution? Eyes on my ass and porno tunes in the background... yea, that'll sell.
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"I HAVE NO MORE GOTTDAMN CUPCAKES!" 08.18.09 The delicate flower that is Mrs. Bradiful Bitch
I usually just wink with my asshole when walking in the park so this'll keep me out of jail.
ooo ooo ooo i finally know the answer to who will wear them...
brit brit or billy ray perhaps?
very good points finch and ears...still...frightening at the thought
Ohhhh, what happens if you walked by an angry sort of dog and made direct eye contact!!!!!
They chose some interestingly shaped people to advertise this nonsense.
--thanks awfully--
*throws out Mom Jeans, runs to get Winkers in every color*
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Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Submitted by specialkt on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:22am.
who the hell would wear that?!
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Apparently chunky people with no taste.
Or, as greenfinch pointed out, trailer park people who would buy a bedazzler...they also generally fall into the above category.
Sooo, you have to have a larger wiggly sort of bum to make them work....but if you are the owner of a larger wiggly sort of bum is that really what you are trying to draw attention to?
Why no pac man set, trying to chew their way off your bum....
HOLY SHIT! cant this guy find models who are in better shape? oooohhhh i get it you have to be chunky to have them "wink" who the fuck would wear that shit?? why draw attention to the fact you have some major ass flab...that one with the owl eyes...i had no words
Those ladies (and that one gentleman??) modelling them are certainly
very, erm, volumptuous. Expecting the fat @$$ jokes to
start in 3 . . . 2 . . .
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It's creamie, not prune!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo
Submitted by specialkt on Thu, 08/20/2009 - 8:22am
oh there are people..you k now the ones that buy a bedazzler...or ones that still wear mullets...live in trailer parks..you know people