Michael Jackson's Return To Neverland
CNN says that Michael Jackson's body will go back home to Neverland on Thursday morning. There will be a public viewing on Friday and a private memorial service on Sunday at Neverland. It's not really know if Michael will be buried at Neverland. The Mayor of Gary, Indiana, Michael's hometown, has asked him family to bury him in their town. He said that Michael could be buried on the grounds of a new Jackson family museum and performing arts center. Translation: They want the tourist cash.
If you live near Neverland, you better beam yourself out of there now, because it's going to be lunacy. The tears from all his fans will flood the whole city, so if you stay, you better keep a kayak and some snorkel equipment handy. You also better get some ear plugs, because their wails will make your ear drums collapse.
When I first read about this, my skin crinkled at the thought of an open casket, but I don't know if they will go that far. Nothing surprises me anymore, though. Imagine all the MySpace and Facebook default pictures of sick hos posing with his body? I weep. Facebook needs to an install an "I Quit This Bitch" button for that reason alone!
And I better not see pictures of Joe Jackson selling tickets and souvenir brochures outside.....
Image: Reuters
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What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and The Black Eyed Peas?
Black Eyed Peas will be playing Giggs in August.
Submitted by stinkweed on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:53pm.
Haha! We posted the same joke at the same time. Weird.
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Weird? No.
Unoriginal? Yes.
These stupid-ass jokes are not new.
Submitted by OXA on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:56pm.
Holy shit. That is so wrong, but so funny!
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“Do anything, say anything, and fuck anything. No excuses, no apologies, no regrets.” --Brian Kinney
U r right, i cant type for lauging.
oxa
I was at my local store last nite trading michael jackson jokes. lol.
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Fucka doodle-do.
Submitted by OXA on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:43pm.
OMFG - hahahahahahahaha!
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“Do anything, say anything, and fuck anything. No excuses, no apologies, no regrets.” --Brian Kinney
Jockeys at tomorrows race meeting will wear black armbands out of
respect for Michael Jackson who successfully rode more 3 yr olds than
anyone in living memory.
-"Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:37pm."
Nooooo! I-MUST-NOT-LAUGH. hahahahahahaha!!!.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Good Grief, can they just lay the poor guy to rest. It's horrible, I could never handle a day in his life without going bananas. I probably would have gone postal on everyone. It's no wonder he wanted to be around children, and not these leeches, the worst being his own father.
Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:51pm.
Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson had things in common. She played with majors and he played with minors.
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HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:37pm.
Okay, I literally spit out part of my cookie when I read this. You all are too much! LOL
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“Do anything, say anything, and fuck anything. No excuses, no apologies, no regrets.” --Brian Kinney
Submitted by OXA on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:43pm.
Reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack are incorrect.
He’s been found in the children’s ward having a stroke
OXA.....you mean he was found at the Children's Ward STROKING.
Submitted by stinkweed on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:47pm.
Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
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Evil!!!! :D
Tickle Loris in action:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLdQ3UhLoD4
Submitted by stinkweed on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:47pm.
Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
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Evil!!!! :D
Tickle Loris in action:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLdQ3UhLoD4
Submitted by stinkweed on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:53pm.
Haha! We posted the same joke at the same time. Weird.
GMTA
Michael Jackson died of food poisoning: He ate a 10-year old wiener.
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CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
Michael Jackson's last words were reportedly "take me to the Children's Hospital".
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"I do believe in goats." - Johnny Depp
And yet, they still make me laugh.
In memory of MJ’s death, McDonald’s is coming out with the new “McJackson”. It’s 50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.
same old jokes from his last molestation trial.
just different ending.
*yawn*
Haha! We posted the same joke at the same time. Weird.
Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates and God asked her what he could do for her having led such an honest life. Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe. Five minutes later, Michael Jackson died.
LMAO These jokes are HIlarious!
♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥
I just watched the MK interview and I swear to the Goddess' of Lucite and Cutlets the minute he spoke unicorn kittens followed by rainbow glitter shot out my ass!!!
When Farrah Fawcett arrived in Heaven, God was such a big fan he decided to grant her one wish.
She asked that all the children in the world could be safe….
So God killed Michael Jackson.
Is this a South Park episode yet?
Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson had things in common. She played with majors and he played with minors.
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
Neil Armstrong walked on the moon.
Michael Jackson touched little boys.
When Joe dies I will be selling rocks to throw at the coffin. I will make a killing. Probably will retire after that.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I'm sorry, but all I can think of is that in another month, his face is going to look like the last third of a Terminator movie. Half machine-half man...
For the sake of a whole lot of cash, let's hope Papa Joe don't hire someone to pull the corpse out of the coffin and work it like a puppet.
Yeah, I said it.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
I like listening to Joe Jackson (not) talk about how he saw Michael cry. I could almost hear his internal dialogue Damn, that boy was so SOFT. I mean, what make a grown my cry? Some blind chirren'? They plenny a blind chirren' on God's earth, if God din't want no blind chirren he wouldna made none! Ain't gotta be cryin' about no blind chirren, leas' they don't gotta be lookin' at that ugly face of his!
♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20
Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:42pm.
Oh I have way worse ones, jack. LOL
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lay em on me....
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Hey, jackass, mind not walking all over my goddamn flowers?
You shouldn't talk to the Reverend Hughes like that.
Fuck him.
That poor man. May his soul rest in peace.
Submitted by Stock Broker on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:41pm.
If they have bumper cars and a water slide....I'm there.
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BWAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! Thanks for making me smile SB=))
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
AH WHO GIVES A SHIT!?????????????
Fuckin bleedin christ on the cross, let this shit DIE already.
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack are incorrect.
He’s been found in the children’s ward having a stroke.
Hotels in Santa Maria are going to be a bunch of busy mother fuckers.
Harvey Milk was a hero. The closest thing to a hero Perez Hilton will be is when he shoves a hero sandwich into his fat mouth.
Oh I have way worse ones, jack. LOL
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
If they have bumper cars and a water slide....I'm there.
Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:37pm.
Oh.My.God. LMFAO!!!!!! you are Bad.
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Hey, jackass, mind not walking all over my goddamn flowers?
You shouldn't talk to the Reverend Hughes like that.
Fuck him.
Submitted by Stock Broker on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:19pm.
Throw him in the grave already and let's move on.
OMG, I laughed so hard at this.
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“Do anything, say anything, and fuck anything. No excuses, no apologies, no regrets.” --Brian Kinney
This whole thing is becoming a circus. I guess it's fitting considering his life was pretty bizarre too.
But come on, Jackson family. Can you show some dignity and grace? That goes to the press too. Jeesh, he's not even buried yet!
Yes, I know he's a celebrity and it's so fashionable to be cynical. But I can't help but feel compassion for MJ, the person. All the bloodsucking we're seeing now is probably only a fraction of what he had to deal with his whole life. Who do you trust? Who really is looking out for you? It makes perfect sense to me now why he would be a recluse who sought the company of children, the only people in his eyes who did not have a vested interest in his celebrity/money.
I don't feel completely sorry for him. His life was more priviledged than most of us. And it's true that he led a wealthy life, but not necessarily a rich one.
I sincerely hope that his soul will rest in peace, away from all of these leeches.
Submitted by Stoney on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:37pm.
Michael Jackson died of a heart attack. Seems he was in K-Mart when they announced a blu-light special: Little boy's shorts half off.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BWWAAAHHHHAAAAA !!!!
♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥
I just watched the MK interview and I swear to the Goddess' of Lucite and Cutlets the minute he spoke unicorn kittens followed by rainbow glitter shot out my ass!!!
Stockbroker, that was great imagery.
Michael Jackson died of a heart attack. Seems he was in K-Mart when they announced a blu-light special: Little boy's shorts half off.
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
I think LaToya sightings will be most prevelant. She most closely resembled him, y'know, minus the talent.
Submitted by RecessVillain on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:28pm.
Submitted by Kandykane on Tue, 06/30/2009 - 2:26pm.
I'm hooking up my hot dog cart as I type ...
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I'll have a foot long, Chicago style.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
See look at that. A customer already and I haven't even left yet!!
Stockbroker: You made me blow snot.
Goodness MK, I'm so fucking HAPPY none of the people I know are Michaeloonies nor give a rat's ass about him, otherwise I would be subjected to such pathetic displays of complete idiocy, such as crazed fans immersing themselves into hysterics over a fucking dead celebrity.
I had enough of such displays of idiocy back in Jr. High school when my friends used to make such ridiculous scenes whenever they saw this argentinian teen idol who was fucking obviously GAY, on the cover of a magazine.
I may seem heartless, but crying over people you have never met is completely ridiculous to me.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
But will they be selling Jesus Juice?
♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥
I just watched the MK interview and I swear to the Goddess' of Lucite and Cutlets the minute he spoke unicorn kittens followed by rainbow glitter shot out my ass!!!