More Importantly, What Is He Smoking?
According to Congressman Steve Buyer of Indiana, smoking lettuce is just like smoking cigarettes. Why do I picture a strung out bunny and a whorey guinea pig sharing a lettuce joint in a back alley?
Good ole' Steve's theory got me thinking about smoking lettuce, so I decided to do some extensive research (aka a ten-second Google search) on the subject. I found this about iceberg lettuce:
When cut, the stems of lettuce plants ooze a milky juice whose appearance, taste, and smell are said to be similar to opium. Once dried, the substance is called lactucarium, or lettuce opium. Used by the ancient Egyptians, the stuff was listed in the Pharmacopeia of the United States of America as late as 1916. It can still be found in herbals and such, which describe it as a sedative and cough suppressant. Lettuce opium can be found in all lettuce species but is most commonly extracted from wild lettuce, Lactuca virosa.
Grab my salad spinner, we're going lettuce huntin'! Do you think you can flavor your lettuce joints with different kinds of dressing?
Don't be surprised if you see me on an episode of Intervention muttering to myself "fix fix gotta get my - lettuce - fix fix" while trolling the produce section of a grocery store.
And here's some pictures of Amy Wino in St. Lucia yesterday, because I'm sure she tries to smoke every single thing she comes in contact with.
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I met my perfect one on ----BlackWhiteMeet, C O M---- It is a wonderful dating site for black and white singles to have fun together! And it's free! Hope it can help you find your ideal match!
haha..republican, go figure
-----
Proud love child of Oprah Winfrey & Bill Gates
Haha someone told me about lettuce when I was 19, but I never actually tried it!
Submitted by Poopele on Sat, 06/13/2009 - 8:45am.
...yes, as Dan Quayle approaches the tenth tee at Doral Country Club in his solid-goal golf cart, and reaches for his 2,000 dollar pitching wedge, I wonder whether he thinks about the lobster and champagne he is having for dinner, or about you thinking he is a dumbass.
Go figure - a guy named Poop defending a dumbass that can't spell "potato!"
Submitted by Poopele on Sat, 06/13/2009 - 8:45am.
...yes, as Dan Quayle approaches the tenth tee at Doral Country Club in his solid-goal golf cart, and reaches for his 2,000 dollar pitching wedge, I wonder whether he thinks about the lobster and champagne he is having for dinner, or about you thinking he is a dumbass.
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ahaaahaa! that's a good one. as if quayle actually THINKS. not
lmao!
.
.
Gots some romaine, boston, iceberg and butter lettuce in the fridge: gonna get my bake on!!
Hahahahah!!
Good morning all!
This is the 2nd pic I see of Amy with this owman: who is she and why are they hanging?
I'm fixing to have me a couple of flaming salad shots!!
Hmm... I have some lettuce growing in my backyard right now..
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'Mom, do you ever feel, you know, not so fresh?'
to give something legitimacy all you have to do is attache the ancient Egyptians to it. they did it and you can too! really, it's a fucking salad.
morning everyone!
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http://redroomflare.blogspot.com/
Submitted by A.cotw on Sat, 06/13/2009 - 3:07am.
yes please,
BTW, alphalpha sprouts are toxic now....yum ;)
****~v~****
"Why would I love a couch?" | "Happy Wife, Happy Life"- Joe
Wake up you slut.... Please?
He Dicho! caso cerrado!!
I had no interest in watching the games at present....I found a hot place, you guys should try it ___Meetrich.Com_____a great place for rich people to meet their soul mates....
deleted comment.
Another dumbass reublican from Indiana... Dan Quayle for a new generation.
...yes, as Dan Quayle approaches the tenth tee at Doral Country Club in his solid-goal golf cart, and reaches for his 2,000 dollar pitching wedge, I wonder whether he thinks about the lobster and champagne he is having for dinner, or about you thinking he is a dumbass.
Well this will be good for the "head" shops.
This brings new meaning to the term 'tossed salad'.
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
OH SHIT. * rubs pair of Buhdda statues on computer desk*
I didn't know Tigerlilly was here, either.I'm a dead goat if she reads the post I left about that Gosselin creature.(I'd rather be any other animal in Chinese astrology, but my mother just had to give birth prematurely.Bitch.)
OT: No one will believe this: my husband just came in, and when I mentioned the morning glory seeds,he told me that he ATE them to get high once as a teenager.He said he had massive hallucinations and nausea.
@joe shmoe, my closest guy friend was sent home from his Anglican summer camp for getting caught flagrante delicto with the priest's daughter a few hours after they arrived.
Since when are Catholic school kids into drugs? In my day it was booze, then wild sex as adults. There was something surreal about being literally DRAGGED into the biggest sextoy/pornshop in San Francisco by my best friend, the ultimate ex-Catholic schoolgirl. That one was a virgin until the age of 23, married the guy 6 years later, and keeps it kinky. Sex on her boss's desk,giving the husband fellatio while he was driving fast,proudly showing off a riding crop,AND a whip,
sex in a borrowed box at the SF Opera House,
slipping out of a conga line during an office holiday party for a knee-trembling quickie in high heels & slipping back in line smirking.
Ooops. The last one was me.
Submitted by soul on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 6:08pm.
oh no,LOL oh yes,LOL lettuce w/bleu cheese, mushrooms please. :)
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psilosybin mushrooms, soul?
Another dumbass reublican from Indiana... Dan Quayle for a new generation.
so, I am going to post this in every thread.
TO ALL you people who are bitching - on this post and others -about MK's ads on here:
what the eff is your problem??? It's called being an ENTREPRENEUR, being SELF-EMPLOYED, and it's the standard IDEAL for what's known as the "American Dream". and, "get a job"... are you serious?!?!
THIS IS A JOB that he has, he's fucking not doing it for the fun only, I mean you rabid people here, all day and night, chomping at the bit for a new post, and he is on here EVERY FUCKING DAY posting shit for you people to giggle at and snark about, and you are going to complain that he needs to "get a job"??? SERIOUSLY????
He is on here 7 fucking days a week posting shit and HE SHOULD FUCKING GET PAID FOR IT.
it's NOT fucking selling out, he's not being a media whore, it's called MAKING A FUCKING LIVING ON YOUR OWN TERMS AND NOT BEING SOMEONE ELSE'S BITCH aka "EMPLOYEE"...
God, this shit is really pissing me off.
P.S.AND IT'S NONE of any of your fucking business how much he is getting paid. I hope he fucking shuts the site down for a week to spite you whinging fools, but then again, I don't, because I'm firmly on his side.
I like most of you but this is getting ridiculous.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
I fuckin' hate the ads all over the place.
i'm leaving this joint and going elsewhere.
With an economic fiasco, mine as well smoke,drink and snort anything you see. Jesu cristo que pasa with this world. hahaha
Coma Caca!!
'sokay you fucking whore. I was holding out on the organic BC Budnip. Lovingly grown by hippies in the foothills of Kamloops.
Hereeee kitty kitty *hides nail clippers behind back* Heeeeerreeeeeee kitty kitty!!!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
The Gosselin Hair Video is here! (A My2Cents/Sandbitch/TITS production)
http://www.dailymotion.com/user/fluffybunnykins666/video/x9dzac_jon-kate...
Pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/36561337@N05
I'd try this, but they'd have to roll some bacon and tomato up with it.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:41pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:35pm.
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:27pm.
So stoners... any truth to the catnip rumours? I'm out of liquor and am prepared to fight the cat for it.
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*sucker punches TITS in the left tit, grabs the bag of sweet, sweet 'nip, and makes a run fer it...*
*
jesus fuck! cats are sneaky. I had NO idea she was lurking!
*rubs bosom*
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*Rollin' big fattie, puttin' some Bob Marley on...firin' it all up...puttin' feets up....Oh yeah...*
Dis some good shit, TITS, where you get dis at? PetCo, right? No, no...PetSmart...they have the good shit...
Oh, I sowwy 'bout sucker punchin' you up in you fun bag like dat...That was wrong of me...'cept I got 'nipped pretty good, so I reckon it was worth it...
What? Like your whores wouldn't sucker punch TITS for drugs? Pssht...You whores will knife a skank for a Lil' Debbie Snack Cake, don't front...
I seen you day shift DListed sluts do it...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Amy's got the Minnie Driver cum Kat Von D cum Gollum look down pat.
PS: cum cum cum
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Work it, baby.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:35pm.
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:27pm.
So stoners... any truth to the catnip rumours? I'm out of liquor and am prepared to fight the cat for it.
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*sucker punches TITS in the left tit, grabs the bag of sweet, sweet 'nip, and makes a run fer it...*
*
jesus fuck! cats are sneaky. I had NO idea she was lurking!
*rubs bosom*
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
The Gosselin Hair Video is here! (A My2Cents/Sandbitch/TITS production)
http://www.dailymotion.com/user/fluffybunnykins666/video/x9dzac_jon-kate...
Pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/36561337@N05
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 9:27pm.
So stoners... any truth to the catnip rumours? I'm out of liquor and am prepared to fight the cat for it.
**************************************
*sucker punches TITS in the left tit, grabs the bag of sweet, sweet 'nip, and makes a run fer it...*
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
So stoners... any truth to the catnip rumours? I'm out of liquor and am prepared to fight the cat for it.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
The Gosselin Hair Video is here! (A My2Cents/Sandbitch/TITS production)
http://www.dailymotion.com/user/fluffybunnykins666/video/x9dzac_jon-kate...
Pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/36561337@N05
in the 3rd thumbnail she's chasing down the guy b/c shes going to try to smoke him too!
~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~
Welcome To Dlisted, Son!
My Son, born 5/28 @ 10lbs 15oz.
Submitted by girl_cheese on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 7:49pm.
LOL @ cabbage rolls.
you one funny monkey fighter!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
The Gosselin Hair Video is here! (A My2Cents/Sandbitch/TITS production)
http://www.dailymotion.com/user/fluffybunnykins666/video/x9dzac_jon-kate...
Pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/36561337@N05
That this idiot is focused on this fuckery explains why my state is going BROKE.
I remember stealing lettuce with my best friend out of her mom's fridge circa 1975. We dried it in her toaster oven and snuck up onto the rafters in her garage to smoke it.
We also tried snorting nutmeg cuz her brother read somewhere that it would get you high.
I was 12, she was 13, and we were totally bad-ass.
Someone's gotta be high to think up this shit. I'm sure you can imagine one of your stoner friends (mine is my 1st cousin) saying, "No, no, really, I'm serious. You CAN smoke lettuce! No, none in the fridge right now but I'll get some first thing tomorrow. (inhale) Ancient Egypshuns used to smoke lettuce and get high. They said that in history class." At this point I ask about cabbage rolls. He doesn't see the humor, "I dunno bout CABBAGE. Just lettuce. Yeah, I'll get some tomorrow (inhale) morning. Yeah. Call you as soon as I get back home ...." If the cops don't apprehend him 'cause he's such a known stoner around town.
@sjsmitty, yes i had to adjust the brightness on my comp.
not to mention i feel she's violating me with those crazy eyes. But i luvs MK, so i'll live.
ONT: I guess iceberg will stop being the step-child lettuce, move over "gourmet" greens!
CUH-CAW!
Submitted by Green Tea Latte on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 7:36pm.
Seriously ENOUGH with the gripe about the ads!
i wasn't saying it's bad of MK, good for him
i actually literally meant it hurts my eyes to look at the colours are way harsh
Seriously ENOUGH with the gripe about the ads!
Lucite, glitter, booze, and weed doesn't grow on trees! Give a hooker a break, they'll be gone soon enough. It's this or less postings of MK's infinite wisdom due to him "working".
ONT: Mesculin
CUH-CAW!
Submitted by mike on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 6:16pm.
For the semi-adventurous, you can also crush, then smoke morning-glory seeds. They're a mild hallucinogen.
ahhh yes..i did that when i was about 15 and they were packet ones with pesticide or some shit on them..that made me sick...but mild my arse, i thought my cd player was god and nearly shaved my hair off to be a monk!
ahh good times. go organic if ya going to try it though :o)
off topic
anybody else getting sore eyes from the massive richards pics?
Manimal5 on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 7:22pm.
Que tal, Mani! *packing mah pipe* *taking deep toke* Ahhhhhhh......
What were we talkin' 'bout, oh yeah Wino. I didn't think it was possible for someone to make coochie cutters look like BIG BUTT MOM shorts.
Submitted by DeeDee on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 7:11pm.
Mmmmmm, latin lettuce.
Yes DeeDee put THAT in your pipe and smoke it!
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Spiedi Credo: How do we, as uninteresting people without any visible talents or distinguishing features, get people to pay us not to do anything?
Im going to have to try now.
I have some parers left from when I smoked weed (im too poor now to afford it) and I quit cigarretes, well I actually quit every monday and then itcomes fucking friday
He Dicho! caso cerrado!!
Submitted by jaariel on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 6:58pm.
MK hasn't sold out...the lemonade gig on the corner wasn't working out.
*Flashes...uh...FUNSACK*
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Spiedi Credo: How do we, as uninteresting people without any visible talents or distinguishing features, get people to pay us not to do anything?
Mmmmmm, latin lettuce.
Oh sit down and shut up jaariel.
MK can only suck so much peen to make money.
He's just one MK after all.
Smoke some lettuce or something.
*Flaunts Funbags*
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Government just needs to butt out. They're gonna go after booze next.
Submitted by jaariel on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 6:58pm.
OK People--Listen Up!
I respectfully disagree.
Submitted by Freak Speely on Fri, 06/12/2009 - 6:57pm.
I hope she gets more than a few of those Mickey Mouse fuckery tattoos removed, especially the "Blake's" over her tit. Total deal-breaker in any future relationship of substance.
```
I would think the deal-breaker for any relationship of substance is that she's Amy Winehouse.
OK People--Listen Up!
I SERIOUSLY don't think MICHAEL K has been WRITING these DLISTED posts for a few days now--SERIOUSLY, the TONE, IRONY, and most of all, HUMOR is def not up to snuff! These recent posts sound like they're written by an INTERN. PLUS look at this ridiculous ad (everywhere!) for Denise R. Now, how often has Michael been told he'd have WAY more ads if he "TONED DOWN" his posts...Well THESE recent posts are way toned (dumbed) down. Has MICHAEL K SOLD OUT??????????????????
That's my tooth. Why do you have that?
GO GREEN! xD
Wino has the ability to look either really tacky/sickly/near death or tanned and rested at the snap of her resiny fingers. I like that bikini top she has on and I hope she gets more than a few of those Mickey Mouse fuckery tattoos removed, especially the "Blake's" over her tit. Total deal-breaker in any future relationship of substance.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
Ah Wino...a vision of homelessness...aren't those the same shorts she had on last week?
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Spiedi Credo: How do we, as uninteresting people without any visible talents or distinguishing features, get people to pay us not to do anything?