A Cover Straight Out Of Jennifer Aniston's Wet Dreams
Brad and Jen are back together! Brad and Jen are getting married again! Brad and Jen are having triplets together! Brad and Jen adopt Maddox! At least that's what I'm thinking the next 4 covers of Star Magazine are going to look like. This week, Brad and Jen had a super secret meeting and the limo driver is spilling the sauce. No, the limo driver's name is not Norman.
The limo driver claims he drove Jennifer Aniston to the Gramercy Park Hotel in NYC at 1am to meet Brad. The limo driver said the two spent a couple of hours together in the back of the private roof club. The driver went on to yap, "It was well planned so no one would see them. They were really careful not to be spotted."
Let me get this straight. They don't want to get caught yet they meet on the rooftop of a hotel? An open roof?! Don't they know that God has eyes? Don't they also know that St. Angie is on God's Fave Five? It just takes one quick text message and their shit is EXPOSED! Creeping around: They are doing it wrong!
And after reading this story, I feel like this is a sign that Brad and Jennifer should star in a remake of My Chauffeur. My brain always goes back to the 80s. Always.
Here's Brangie's fuckery on 3 more covers this week. Can the tabloids please find a way to get Brad to leave St. Angie for Megan Fox? That's where this is headed....
VIA Cover Awards
ShareThis
kanderso on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:46pm
Here's the thing, since they only respond one way and only slightly differing variations of the same points they try to make, it is logical to conclude that in fact Skeletina is less than dimensional.
Her loons are a direct reflection of their leader.
X to X yo'
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
It went back to it's Loon Manual for the chapter on "How to argue intelligently"
OOOOOOHHHHHHHH yea, more flames.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:45pm.
Brad always said, "Jen puts the X in sex."
**************
Haha, yes, I've heard that. I'm sure he needs a lot of sex living with that icy cold harpy.
Oh, wait, they aren't living together anymore! My bad! :)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
Hee, the funny thing is that I've whipped out this quote on JJ and got the same exact response.
Srsly, is there a Loon manual or something? How do they all give identical responses to everything??
And what the hell is a HEND? This bitch has typed HEND like 20 times!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
Brad always said, "Jen puts the X in sex."
Brad Pitt tazes old ladies and Angelina steals donated breastmilk from orphans.
TRUFAX.
SKELETINA NEEDS CGI AND NOT SHOWING HER FUCKING UGLY ASS MUG TO MAKE A PROFIT!'
ALL HER "SUCCESSES" HAVE BEEN BECAUSE OF BEING THE F- ACTOR IN AN A++++ ENSEMBLE!
SHE CANNOT CARRY A MOVIE!
MEGAN FOX WILL BE WAY MORE SUCKLESSFUL THAN SKELETINA!
OH AND SHE HAS DEFAMED CLINT EASTWOOD, HE SHOULDA GOT AN OSCAR INSTEAD HE GOT CUNTFACE!
HA!
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
I bet he fucked her.
What the fuck is a HEND?
Oh also I can spell out X's name perfectly fine. F-U-C-K-I-N-G L-O-S-E-R!!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
KANDERSO, your quote at the bottom of your comments is idiotic. YOU jealous HENS love that quote but YOU ALWAYS LEAVE OUT THE FACT THAT MICHAEL DOUGLAS APOLOGIZED and said he'd actually never talked to Angelina and was completely kidding around. I don't know who LA is but I am Carrie D so that does not stand for LA, you idiots!!! PEACE OUT I am sick of you sad pathetic lonely haters. Just a bunch of pathetic HENDS!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
ME: Lmao I See that! lol
She has a new soulmate and PLANS.
kdraco - that is the concesus.
Where'd she go? She get vanned already?
*sniffs* Yeah, I smell a loon in here! Where have you been hiding? It has taken long enough. And have you really resorted to calling Jen 'X'? Let's call Angie Jo 'C' and I will let your imagination run wild on what that is short for.
Is carrie D our previous L.A.?
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:28pm.
Now Megan Fox is a hottie. I don't see why people compare her to the skeleton like Jolie. Plus, you can tell that Megan is much, much smarter than Angie.
____________________________________
Haha, this statement, I can't quite get behind.
I mean, at least the smarter part. She's def. hotter than Jolie body-wise. Although, there's something about Megan's face I don't care for...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
I am awaiting my thank you for taking the time to erase names with symbols.
Ungrateful loon.
EEG - I HAD to do it!
Now Megan Fox is a hottie. I don't see why people compare her to the skeleton like Jolie. Plus, you can tell that Megan is much, much smarter than Angie.
I mean, you do realize that the fact that you can't type out Jennifer Aniston's name on the internet makes you a total fucking lunatic, right?
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
Guys, I think Carrie D might actually be ANGELINA JOLIE.
Not positive, but signs point to yes.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
M.E.,
Excellent!
Cackling like a crackwhore.
What the difference between a dog movie and a CARTOON, carrie? (if we're going by your argument that non-humans as co-stars equals fail)
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
Even funnier? MEGAN FOX'S "Transformers" has done better than any of AJ's movies, combined in the last FIVE YARS!
*cackles like a lunatic*
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:19pm.
X's STUPID DOG MOVIE HAD A DOG AS THE MAIN CHARACTER! ANGELINA NEVER HAD TO RELY ON A DOG TO MAKE A MOVIE SELL! HER NAME ALONE SELLS!
'X' was never in a movie based on a video game character (baby raid..umm tomb raider) END OF STORY! Remember sky captain and the world of tomorrow?? yea me neither
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
"I've met Janeane Garofalo and she's a cunt"-Artie Lange
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:19pm.
X's STUPID DOG MOVIE HAD A DOG AS THE MAIN CHARACTER! ANGELINA NEVER HAD TO RELY ON A DOG TO MAKE A MOVIE SELL! HER NAME ALONE SELLS!
--------------------------------------------
Apparently not, since her shitty movies tank.
X's STUPID DOG MOVIE HAD A DOG AS THE MAIN CHARACTER! ANGELINA NEVER HAD TO RELY ON A DOG TO MAKE A MOVIE SELL! HER NAME ALONE SELLS!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:14pm.
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:10pm.
Yes, I'm sure that's TOTALLY true. I think it is retarded when people talk about 'oh, my friend met so and so'. YEAH RIIIIIIIIGHT. Well I have a "friend" who met X once and X pooped on her shoe! What a bitch that X is!
------
I WISH X would poop on my shoe! I would never wash that off. I would probably have it lacquered and wear it 4EVAH!!
X Topples Jolie's 2008 Earnings
13 April 2009 12:00 AM, PDT | From wenn.com | See recent WENN news
X has trumped her ex-husband Brad Pitt's new partner Angelina Jolie - by earning a reported $13 million (£8.9 million) more than her in 2008.
X is said to have earned a staggering $27 million (£18.4 million) on the strength of films such as Marley & Me - while the Tomb Raider star took in $14 million (£9.5 million).
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:06pm.
Submitted by Sbeetle on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:00pm.
I think it's fishy all the covers Angie is on this week. You don't think she feeds the tabs? Only Jen? Think again. They're both feeding them. Why else would this "triangle" be going on so many years later?
OH YOU ARE SO RIGHT, but of course Angie does not want these kind of rumors floating around. IT IS X AND HER PATHETIC FRIENDS THAT STIR UP ALL THIS DRAMA. I'm sure they are all these ANONYMOUS sources! X STILL SITS AROUND HATING ANGIE AND WHY!!! IT WAS FIVE YEARS AGO - - DEAL WITH IT! Sad X, she probably gets drunk on her boxed wine all alone and drunk dials her tabloid contacts with new Brad and Angie FALSE gossip and LIES!
**********************
Hey now, let's not bring boxed wine in on this! Gosh!
You know this 'X' business makes me think abuot people who spell swears with a number or symbol, you know- SH1T or B1T*CH,
Brace yourself, we can say what we like here. Look- Jennifer. Shit. Cunt. Baby buying junkie. Ah sweet freedom.
*******************************************
Morbidly obese, barren, jellus h8er, jen-hen at your service.
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:10pm.
Yes, I'm sure that's TOTALLY true. I think it is retarded when people talk about 'oh, my friend met so and so'. YEAH RIIIIIIIIGHT. Well I have a "friend" who met X once and X pooped on her shoe! What a bitch that X is!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
Submitted by No Words on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:00pm.
Angelina Jolie is no more a humanitarian than Marie Antoniette was. *snort*
LET THEM EAT CAKE!
**************************
LOL, I read that as Let Them Eat COKE! :)
Submitted by GlitterKitty on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:01pm.
Carrie D, well he married that lazy, clingy woman and so far he hasn't done so with this Godess Angelina?
________________________________________
I have read many articles that say that Angie is actually the one who doesn't want marriage again because of her parents' terrible marriage and her marriage ending.
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:04pm.
Um, Wanted was considered a box office FLOP. All that hype and it didn't bring in the money to back it.
Are you using LOGIC again? We have had occasion to speak to you about this before. See below for correct interpretation. Don't thank me, it's a public service.
AH WHANT MAH SON movie= died on arse at box office, not one award. NO! It is ART and all the more so as it is about MOTHERHOOD.
SKINNY ARMS BARELY LIFTING A GUN MOVIE= died on it's arse etc- NO! It is a statment about violence from a UN AMBASSADOR.
Honestly.....
*******************************************
Morbidly obese, barren, jellus h8er, jen-hen at your service.
I have a friend who lives in Vietnam. She told me that when Angie visited the orphanage that she was a complete bitch. She had three assistances just to keep the children away from her, including one who held a portable fan to "keep the smell away." She only would hold one after they were bathed and rubbed down with Purell. Real humanitarian. Jen Wins.
I'm making some popcorn & pulling up a chair for this one
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 1:54pm.
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 12:20pm.
You are so stupid jazzfish! Yes, much better to be lazy beach bum than it is to be working hard for humanitarian causes. RIIIIGHT. JEN HEND!
====
Whoo-HOO!!! I got attacked! My day is made!! High fives all around!!
-
Angie's time has come and gone. She's showing enough forehead and veins to qualify as a pecker.
OMG it's talking to me!!
*puts on tin foil hat and hazmat suit*
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
A movie making a shit ton of money doesn't mean it was good. It means people will watch really fucking stupid movies. So really, Brad and Ange aren't great actors- they just prey upon the glum and dumb.
Submitted by Sbeetle on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:00pm.
I think it's fishy all the covers Angie is on this week. You don't think she feeds the tabs? Only Jen? Think again. They're both feeding them. Why else would this "triangle" be going on so many years later?
OH YOU ARE SO RIGHT, but of course Angie does not want these kind of rumors floating around. IT IS X AND HER PATHETIC FRIENDS THAT STIR UP ALL THIS DRAMA. I'm sure they are all these ANONYMOUS sources! X STILL SITS AROUND HATING ANGIE AND WHY!!! IT WAS FIVE YEARS AGO - - DEAL WITH IT! Sad X, she probably gets drunk on her boxed wine all alone and drunk dials her tabloid contacts with new Brad and Angie FALSE gossip and LIES!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
Submitted by Carrie D on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 2:02pm.
-------------------------------------------------
Okay, you dumbass....when in hell has Angelina Jolie ever had a Number One picture? When?
Wanted? shit
Beowulf? shit
Changeling? shit
Her movies suck ass.
Um, Wanted was considered a box office FLOP. All that hype and it didn't bring in the money to back it.
Stoney's picture
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 12:44pm.
Wanted was also terrible. Changeling was not horrible but I guess that had something to do with Clint Eastwood and the other good actors in the film. Angie always pulls off the I've been stuck in mental institution roles. But seriously, if I have to turn my tv on one more time and see Angie's bony arm hanging off another building or car violently machine gunning the entire city around her because studios think it's sexy I'm gonna be sick.
YEAH RIGHT, WANTED WAS HORRIBLE THAT'S WHY IT GROSSED $340,934,768 IN THEATERS ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FACE IT, ANGIE DOES IT BETTER THAN YOUR PATHETIC IDOL!
__________________________________________________
"I met the right person. I don't like being without him." - Angelina Jolie talking about life partner Brad Pitt.
X
Carrie D, well he married that lazy, clingy woman and so far he hasn't done so with this Godess Angelina?
What am I doing? Engaging with Brangaloonies never ends well.
I think it's fishy all the covers Angie is on this week. You don't think she feeds the tabs? Only Jen? Think again. They're both feeding them. Why else would this "triangle" be going on so many years later?
_____________________________________
My teenage angst has a body count!