Monday, June 8th 2009
Open Post: Hosted By Ryan Seacrest's Childhood Photo
Ryan Gaycrest was on Conan last week and brought this precious picture of him as a child. Yes, Gaycrest used to be a middle-aged fat lesbian. Please tell Joel McHale has already tattooed this picture on his ass. I'm about to do just that, because this is too beautiful for words. Why do celebwhores look so much more interesting as kids. Now that is a dude I would share a box (or twenty) of Ring Dings with.
This picture also makes me want to break into my elementary school and burn every yearbook and piece of microfiche containing my picture. You should do the same.
VIA ONTD
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Ho sweater for hot slut of the day!
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CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:53pm.
EH I thought you said you had to go somewhere
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I do...but im always procrastinating because of this effing site....its just to funny today, besides...im getting ideas about what I want to make tonight...garlic chicken anyone?
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*I really want to give myself a paper cut right about now*
*Never buy anything from someone whos out of breath*
Team Ho Sweater!
Submitted by Event Horizon on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:52pm.
Yeah, and I HOPE I win the lottery too, but the chances are I won't.
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
OMG, all night eatery of a vagina! I think I just peed me pants.
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She's flat and that's that!
Submitted by Event Horizon on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:52pm.
but whatever, cant sweat the small stuff...
****
*takes a deep breath*
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!!!!!!
*runs off cackling*
Miss Jane, yes, totally aware about the egging on.
@ Stoney
ROTFLMAO
The ho sweater hasn't been washed in so long it probably can get up, walk around, and go do it's own ho stuff independently of EH.
Submitted by Event Horizon on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:50pm.
Well I so appreciate your kindness in trying help me out there. Actually my vagina is now like a Barbie vagina (thank you LCT for that comparison) and it plans to stay that way since I am no longer interested in sex for the moment.
Amazing what a bad relationship can do for a sex drive!
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
Leave the ho sweater alone!!!!
TEAM HO SWEATER
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
EH I thought you said you had to go somewhere
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
I bet the homeless, scraggly haired dude could do things to you you never knew possible.
*makes note to self*
*must have HAWT sex with a scraggly homeless man before dying*
Wait....
*erases note*
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:45pm.
Lately my significant other's duck butter has been a bit garlicy tasting.
Thats because his boyfriend has bruchetta enemas
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
"I've met Janeane Garofalo and she's a cunt"-Artie Lange
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:49pm.
EH- Here's an idea: Why not keep your open all night eatery of a vagina closed from business for a while and stick to dating, getting to know someone and then practicing SAFE SEX .
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I practice safe sex usually its just sometimes I didnt with him so im really hoping he didnt have anything...but whatever, cant sweat the small stuff...
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*I really want to give myself a paper cut right about now*
*Never buy anything from someone whos out of breath*
You guys are seriously cracking me up at work...my officemate thinks I am nuts. However you realize you are just egging it on, right? :)
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And baby when it's love if it's not rough it isn't fun.....
LMAO @ louise_brooks
PHEW!!!!
freeee ewww don't make me think of RPatz, it's grosser than duck butter!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
Submitted by Event Horizon on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:47pm.
*laughs*
I dont care what you say. if im forced to have sex between one of two men...one in the military, the other homeless....im choosing the military guy every time and I defy anyone of you to say youll choose differnt. if im going to get the clap..id rather get it from a handsome dude that I can have some self respect about than a ugly scraggly dude.
```
Said the girl with the ho sweater and 3 day old jizz in her hair who admits she only occasionally showers and launders her clothes.
Uvula - when we got married, he used to do it and I was always getting bounced checks and late payment letters. I finally decided to double check his register and OMFG! He'd clump like a weeks worth of ATM into one amount, never, EVER balanced the book, just went off of the deposit slip.
It took me almost a year to clean that shit up! I do everything online now. And I balance the check book just about every day. It's just a pain in the ass sometimes.
@Isprained- we used to watch that episode every memorial day at my school!!!
@devilgirl-want me to call my man and see if he has any friends stationed there? We can send them to your house so you dont have to make the long trip if you want...
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*I really want to give myself a paper cut right about now*
*Never buy anything from someone whos out of breath*
EH- Here's an idea: Why not keep your open all night eatery of a vagina closed from business for a while and stick to dating, getting to know someone and then practicing SAFE SEX .
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:45pm.
Lately my significant other's duck butter has been a bit garlicy tasting. Does this mean he's cheating on me? He's in the military so that's prolly a dumb question. Geez, if you can't trust a soldier....
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Either that or he's trying to combat a vampire problem. Have you been reading Twilight books?
@ snowpiece
No, he's not cheating. He just really, really likes the endless soup and garlic breadsticks lunch from The Olive Garden.
Military guys are coated in teflon I hear. It's the non-stick coating used by the Pentagon and TFal!
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
*laughs*
I dont care what you say. if im forced to have sex between one of two men...one in the military, the other homeless....im choosing the military guy every time and I defy anyone of you to say youll choose differnt. if im going to get the clap..id rather get it from a handsome dude that I can have some self respect about than a ugly scraggly dude.
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*I really want to give myself a paper cut right about now*
*Never buy anything from someone whos out of breath*
ME- Mine can and will do them. My penance is it being a four hour fucking ordeal every Sunday morning with spreadsheets and calculators and all manner of horseshit.
Stoney, don't bring up scabs!
*forces self not to pick at scalp*
Lately my significant other's duck butter has been a bit garlicy tasting. Does this mean he's cheating on me? He's in the military so that's prolly a dumb question. Geez, if you can't trust a soldier....
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:44pm.
LMAO!!
Uvula - If the BH did the finances, we'd be homeless.
He SUCKS at it! Hence, why I take care of it.
Submitted by freebird on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:42pm.
Damn. I'm screwed. I had a theory that the grease kept everything from sticking.
``
Right, like a protective film.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:42pm.
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:40pm.
Yes. The burning is just your love for each other.
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Hahaha! Elvis sang about Burning Love, wonder if that is what he meant. He was in the Service you know!
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
The Peanuts gang learns about military-grade VD in "It Burns When I Pee, Charlie Brown".
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:39pm.
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:38pm.
STDs only stick to dirty guys with long hair.
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Damn. I'm screwed. I had a theory that the grease kept everything from sticking.
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:40pm.
Yes. The burning is just your love for each other.
*sings*
America! America! He shed his scab on me!
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:37pm.
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You, too? I'm about to have my husband take over doing the finances again because doing the math is sucking my fucking will to live.
*looks for window to jump from
LMAO @ freeeee Don't ask Don't Tell, LMAO
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
Is it normal to have a firey sensation every time you pee, and then uncontrollable itching afterward? My Pvt. Ryan said that he feels the same thing, but I am a little suspicious he is lie telling!
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:35pm.
Hey guys, I just had sex with a guy , and at the base of his penis there was a sore with cloudy green discharge seeping from it. Should I be worried? His hair was short and he is in the Army.
Uh, I think I am cool, right?
******
Don't ask, don't tell. That's my policy.
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:38pm.
STDs only stick to dirty guys with long hair.
Submitted by EastEndGirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:31pm.
(.) (.) cept nicer.
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Where'd you get that picture of Brittney's south-pointing nips?
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:36pm.
DG: you'll be fine, they don't let dirty guys fight for our country!
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Whew! Thanks Stoney. It kinda looked like a loogie (sp) was on his peen, but I guess you make a good point, our Military does not allow STD's in. STD's aren't part of the don't ask don't tell policy are they?
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
"A lot of homeless people are criminally insane, mentally ill in some other capacity that makes them unable to function in society or just plain lazy street kids.....dont feel too bad."
- Oh Ok then. Kinda what I feel and think about you, don't feel too bad.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by devilgirl on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:35pm.
Hey guys, I just had sex with a guy , and at the base of his penis there was a sore with cloudy green discharge seeping from it. Should I be worried? His hair was short and he is in the Army.
Uh, I think I am cool, right?
``
Totally cool. It was probably daiquiri ice ice cream from 31 Flavors. Carry on.
And this one time, I banged a dude and his entire peen was purple. I don't need to get checked, right? I mean he was a lance corporal, after all.
_____________________________________________
CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
*cries*
I just balanced my check book.
*hangs self*
DG,
You are safe as long as you took it in the arse.
:)
DG: you'll be fine, they don't let dirty guys fight for our country!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Mon, 06/08/2009 - 4:32pm.
Wow, and I thought Duck butter was going to be the low point today. Who's winning here?
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I never thought I'd say this, but for me, Team All Peen Is Diseased Peen.
Hey guys, I just had sex with a guy , and at the base of his penis there was a sore with cloudy green discharge seeping from it. Should I be worried? His hair was short and he is in the Army.
Uh, I think I am cool, right?
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............