Cunty Clay Bites The Hand That Fed Him
A little while ago there was a rumor that Gayken wanted to duet with Glamberace, but producers SHUT HIM DOWN. There might have been some truth to that rumor, because maybe that would explain why the Unicorn Queen of the South pounced onto his official website (which charges $30 a year for membership) and put his buttery ladyfingers to work on a super long post about the future of American Idol (sample: Glamberace's voiced caused a stigmata in his ears). I know you're still stuck on that $30 a year for membership, but that's a small price to pay for a Claymate. They would find a way to give a kidney a year just to lick the words Gayken typed.
Gawker posted the entire rant Gayken wrote and I have it for you below, but this bitch is long. Have yourself a cup of spiked sweet tea and sit back, because once the Gayken starts, he doesn't stop. Also, make sure to read it in his precious Southern Twang. I also pictured him snapping his teeth, rolling his eyes and cooing at his clayby while writing this. That made it a little more entertaining. All the bitter bitchery courtesy of Gayken is after the jump. JUMP!!!
Now that it's all over, and for the record.... I couldn't be happier about the way AI ended this year. I only turn the show on once a season, and only to see what the set looks like each year. This year, I happened to turn it during the minute that Adam Lambert was singing "Ring of Fire" and, at that moment, thought my ears would bleed. Contrived, awful, and slightly frightening! I wasn't really a fan and found myself surprised whenever folks told me that they liked him. Granted, I never saw another performance (and many folks who I trust said that he was great) but I can't imagine I would have enjoyed it. Just not my cup of tea at all. To each his own. I never saw Kris sing on the show, but whether he was good or not is really relative. It's usually a matter of taste, right? But Idol is not always a matter of musical taste only. It's about the person you like. From what little I saw, Kris seemed likable. (That's not to say that Adam isn't just as likable as anyone.. maybe more so... I don't know) When Ruben and I were standing next to each other every night (many years ago) you had two equally talented, equally unlikely, equally unpolished contestants.... so it really was a matter of taste as to who was voted for. While some may argue that one of us was hyped more than the other, I don't feel that was the case. However, this year, there was an obvious bias. Not even having watched the show, I can tell you that I was WELL aware of the bias from the judges as to who should win. In my opinion, that is awfully unattractive. I don't think I am aloneIn my opinion, it all often comes down to that last night of voting. Until the finale, folks are voting for the contestant that they want to see continue. But, I believe that on that last night, the dynamic changes. No longer forced to choose one person that they want to see win, the audience can effectively vote AGAINST the person that they don't want to see win. In the case of season two this might have happened. There may have been some folks who voted for myself or Ruben because they didn't like the other of us. I was the nerdy little girly boy who some didn't want to see win, so they may have voted for Ruben. I don't know. .. But again, I feel that Ruben and I were fairly matched. We both had our detractors and negatives, but I feel we were both very worthy of being on that stage in that moment, and either of us would have been worthy of winning. The show was different then, and folks made it in seasons 1-3 because they were "real" people who happened to sing/entertain well. But, somewhere along the way, AI stopped being about real people.
In a battle between David and Goliath, my money is on David!
I think many voters got sick of being "told who to vote for". I think many were turned off by the blatant favoritism shown towards one contestant. Therefore, on that last night, they used their votes against a contestant that they were tired of hearing about and for the contestant who had been written off. And, at the same time, I think they voted AGAINST an American Idol that has, for four years now, been more about the slick productions and polished contestants than it has been about finding the raw talent that it did in its first three seasons.
Those votes for Kris were also votes to return the show to its roots of finding "real" contestants with undiscovered talent and giving them the chance to grow and shine. They were votes that said "we're tired of seeing contestants who already seem to know it all".
Will American Idol choose to listen to the resounding and clarion call that those voters gave them?.... "Enough with the pretention. More Rubens, more Clays, more Fantasias and Tamyras and Kellys please." My faith has always been in the voters. I think they have gotten it right every year (mine included). It's now up to American Idol to decide if it will finally REALLY listen to the folks that keep it on the air.
Get the metallic bikinis and the oil pool out, because it's about to be a wha?! A GAYFIGHT!!!! I just hope they don't start making out before round 1 ends, because that would make my no-no crawl into my belly button never to be heard from again.
But seriously, Gayken does make a few valid points, but really....it's a stupid fucking reality show. IT'S NOT REAL LIFE! One of the judges is a crazy bitch who used to dance around with a rapping cartoon cat (and probably still does in her head). It's not like we're voting for the President! I know some hos think that, but we're not! However, this is coming from a bitch who cried one single tear when Allison Iraheta was given the ax.
What I'm trying to say is: Fuck a donut, Gayken! Hmmm....donuts.
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clay aiken is right, and i watched the whole season. he is astute in his observations. unlike us, and you blind adam fans clay actually lived the idol experience so he knows the inner workings and what not. lastly, you rabid adam fans are the ones coming off bitter.
Submitted by Sluttsville on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 9:11am.
Who's Clay Aiken?
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He's the model for yesterday's CT contest.
Who's Clay Aiken?
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If I don't do something, I'm going to end up going on the DL site every night for the rest of my life like the rest of those sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death and wondering what the hell happened.
eh, I'm on Team Girly Aiken. I stopped watching the show years ago because of how grossly manipulating Simon is, and I didn't watch this season except for some horrific note at the end of some song Adam sang and I hated his voice, but I knew, without watching, that he was totally pimped to win. I barely heard anything about anyone else. I think that's Aiken's point.
American Idol manages to suck and blow.
"now you all have numbers, so we're going to do this alphabetically"
SHUT THE FLAMING FUCK UP GAYKEN!
Gwad, I couldn't even read all of that ridiculous shit.
He's a JELUS H8R now that he is not the gayest of gays to grace the Idol stage. His homo-ocity got it's feelings hurt because Adam WAS HIMSELF and still made it to the end.
Gayken is a poster child of bitter nellies now, give him a gottdamn Idol Award for that....
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by Green Is Good on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:54am.
LMAO!! That should be QuaCker Factory. I haven't had any coffee yet.
www.QVC.com/QuackerFactory
Submitted by madam s. on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:52am.
Please. We all know Clay watches every single episode of American Idol, every single season. Not only that, but he Tivos it and watches it on repeat until he learns all of the songs, puts on costumes, and dances in his living room "outshining" the contestants on the show.
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While crying hot, salty tears and screaming, "WHY??"
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Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
My fervent hope is that Kathy Griffin reads her Gayken's blog and comments on what a bitter queen he has become. STFU and know your role, Clay, or did you forget you ALSO were the runner-up? It *is* a matter of taste, since you didn't win.
He's a funny homo. Adam makes his ears bleed, but Clay's voice makes my nuts try to ascend into my pelvis.
~-*+*-~
"Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass." ~ Cordelia Chase
Clay has a beautiful voice but seems pretty ugly in almost every other aspect. And I'd like to re-introduce my observation about him being gross and gummy in the mouth area. And that's not even when he's spewing sour grapes.
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100% DMBAS
@louise_brooks, are Quakers allowed to watch t.v.?! Methinks she's cavorting with the Devil! *evil laugh*
Erm, didn't we all bitch about the judges' bias every week? I do think they have an agenda. They were fairly hard on some contestants (I thought they were tough on Allison), and just kissed major ass with others. We always talked about Gokey, because hardly anybody on Dlisted liked him, but COME ON. The judges were all up Adam's ass. And I do think that hurt him. It didn't matter whether his performance was good or bad - he was praised. The ONLY criticism I ever heard directed at him in the last five or six rounds was Simon after ring of Fire. And even that, he followed the criticism up with a compliment.
Plus, the judges are always 'predicting' who will be in the final two during their judging, which I think really might mess with the vote.
So I kind of agree with ol' Clay here. Not that I care or anything, because I totally don't.
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You're a rebel? You think you're a rebel? You're not a rebel, you're fucking psychotic! ~ Veronica Sawyer
Hahaha there was nothing better than reading the comments from the Claymates when he finally came out...shit like "I've been sitting here at my computer screen since I read the news last night. Fifteen long hours of crying onto my keyboard." and "You know, I really thought some day that Clay and I could get married. Now that will never happen for me".
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
COME AT ME, BITCH!
Please. We all know Clay watches every single episode of American Idol, every single season. Not only that, but he Tivos it and watches it on repeat until he learns all of the songs, puts on costumes, and dances in his living room "outshining" the contestants on the show.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
On another board I post on, there is a rabid Claymate. She was actually shocked when Clay came out.
She takes Idol soooooo seriously. I made a joke about one of the contestants from a few seasons ago being freaky looking. She went friggin insane!! "What did he ever do to you??? He has an awesome voice!!!!! People like you make me VOMIT!!!"
Okay, I could see if she were vomiting because of some of the other shit I've done, but not because I didn't like her Idol contestant.
I imagine she wears a lot of Quaker Factory clothing.
If I'm not mistaken Clay got dropped from his label. BWAAAAHAHAHA
$30 a year, are you kidding me? That's ridiculous!
WHAT'S GOING ON? CAN SOMEONE HAND ME MY SWEATER? I NEED MY MEDS, DEAR.
I think my favorite line in that whole rant is... "I was the nerdy little girly boy who some didn't want to see win..."
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"...We don't exist for the beautiful people of the world...We're there for the oddball, the rebel, the outcast, the geek!"
hes prob just pissed he didnt get to get up on teh stage and strut his stuff in his wee bikini like whatsherface...
Shandi - I don't know what Clay would have to be smug about! I think his face is just bloated!
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
COME AT ME, BITCH!
Wait, this is not the post about sucking 200 dicks?
*slams door*
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful -- Seneca
What the fuck is Clay Aiken so jealous of.... In 3 years, Glamberace will be doing interactive shows in discount cruise ship lounges...if he's lucky. I mean shit, Clay can't even beg his way onto an appearance for the show that launched his "career" these days! It's not like "Idol" is a reliable jumping off point for artists at all...yeah, they can get some publicity from it but the fact that they came from AI makes them look like an asshole.
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
COME AT ME, BITCH!
You know, I disagree with whole "Adam's 'Ring of Fire' made my ears bleed" thing, but whatever.
I do agree that there probably were some unsure AI fans who didn't have their fave in the top 2 that probably voted for Kris simply because the judges kept pushing Adam, but I think it's retarded to criticize the judges for, you know....judging. They're there to tell them how they did and what they think. If that includes "I think you should win," fine, so be it. They know they don't get a vote. I don't think I've ever heard any of them say "America, you need to vote for [random Idol ho]." So, in that respect, go choke on a dick and die, Clay.
(It's also annoying because he starts out by dissing Adam and saying the winner should be America's favorite, not necessarily the best, then seems to go on to argue that Adam probably would've won if it hadn't been for the judges turning America off by playing "favorites." Yet he's saying he agrees with Kris's win and thinks America got it right. Makes NO sense. He's just bitching to bitch. He's jealous because Adam is a better singer and is exponentially more interesting than his washed-up ass. Whatever, cunt.)
Gargoyles!!!
~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~
If youre reading this, I havent given birth yet....dammit all!!
4D pic of my son taken 5/7/09 @ 36w3d
Submitted by mharker on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:15am.
EXACTLY! He watched ONE song, from ONE episode, and he feels qualified to judge? Just because he didn't care for the one song? What an asshole.
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"Are you coming or going? Or, are you coming, and then going? Or, are you coming and staying?" --Brian Kinney
Clay Aiken can fuck right off.
AIKEN IS GOING DOWN, BITCHES!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"Liberache, Versace, Coocarachi"
STFU, Clay! That's all I can say right now, 'cause I'm pissed. Just STFU!
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"Are you coming or going? Or, are you coming, and then going? Or, are you coming and staying?" --Brian Kinney
Submitted by Karma Police on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:29am.
Clay sounds jealous that Adam is the next big thing in American Idol world.
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Yes! I also think he is jealous of the fact that Adam has the huevos to embrace his gayness.
They both need to lighten up on the makeup. Less is more gentlemen, less is more.
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Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 11/25/2008 - 10:23pm.
SNOOGLE for HOT SLUT OF THE YEAR!!!
xo
Submitted by madam s. on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:21am.
Couldn't get through the whole thing, but he seems pretty profoundly invested in something he claims to only watch one episode per year of.
Seriously. He should add "...not that I care or anything, no really, I don't" to every sentence.
My aunt is a Clay fan. She doesn't eat Ho Ho's and Funyuns like another poster suggested. And I never heard her talk about Sarah Palin specifically. But she is a die-hard Republican.
Submitted by mharker on Fri, 05/22/2009 - 8:15am.
If he hadn't watched the show, how was he so well aware of the bias from the judges? Adam was all over the media so that bias I get, but I don't think he can make a valid judgement on how the judges were acting if he never saw them in action.
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I never watch the show and knew this too. The judges were interviewed on the different rag shows and papers. They would show the judges "critiquing" (sp) him and falling all over themselves...not sure if that's how he knew, or he just has a really big stick stuck up his arse
I'm not even going to read the rant. But doesn't he look smug in that photo? I notice that a lot lately when I see a photo of him.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Clay sounds jealous that Adam is the next big thing in American Idol world.
News Headline 2024-
Once known for his American Idol win, a frail and bald Mr. Aiken was arrested by Lao authorities for soliciting underage sex. His only comment was, "do you know who I am?"
Couldn't get through the whole thing, but he seems pretty profoundly invested in something he claims to only watch one episode per year of.
And I just can't stand this delusional, slimy guy, and can only imagine what his fans are like. I guarantee Clay Aiken fans LOVED Sarah Palin. I just have a feeling.
Is it just me or is Gayken looking more and more like Rocky Dennis?
"Bitter! Table for one, Ms. Gayken,right this way!"
"If Drinks Aren't Involved, Then Neither Am I."
me thinks someone grew out of his britches...
ahh... jealous much hahaha
I agree with his point about the audience being told who to vote for this season, but the part that gets me is: "Not even having watched the show, I can tell you that I was WELL aware of the bias from the judges as to who should win."
If he hadn't watched the show, how was he so well aware of the bias from the judges? Adam was all over the media so that bias I get, but I don't think he can make a valid judgement on how the judges were acting if he never saw them in action.
Yum -- Spiked Sweet Tea! I love Firefly vodka.
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You say potato, I say vodka!
Um...........what? *rolly eye*
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Whoa!! Wait. I thought tossing salad meant throwing up. WTH does it mean?? - DiamondDawg
If he thinks it was his sheer talent that gave him the victory all those years agao (and not the bajillion claymates speed dialing with Ho-Ho and Funyon-encrusted fingers), he's beyond delusional. It's a popularity contest, dick-cheese. Everyone else has known that from the beginning.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
Irrelevant glorified karaoke contest. The only redeeming factor to it is watching Paula's own patented brand of crazy.