Tuesday, May 19th 2009

Shock! Disbelief!

Sienna Miller has finally released Balthazar Getty's peen from her Jaws of Death vagina and has moved on to new wang. AND this dick doesn't have a wedding ring attached to it!!!! I know, how is that possible really? I didn't think Sienna's vagina allowed entrance unless there was a ring on it.

The Mirror is saying that someone finally turned the hose on Sienna and Balthazar, because they are no longer bumping it. Sienna felt that there was just too much baggage there and she needed to move on. Translation: The big whore woke up, smelled the same stale jizz and realized it was time for some fresh dick.

Hoooooray! I was thisclose to writing that mega slut off, because no self-respecting tramp nibbles on the same peen for that long. Bitch's vagina was probably starting to get the zzzzzs during fucky times with Balthazar. Well, homewhore has a new piece.

Sources say the new piece is Josh Hartnett. Remember when Josh's tummy got the owies, because he had some bad water or bad coke or something? Well, Sienna Miller was right by his side "nursing" him to health. Sienna is like the Florence Nightingale of whores! A source said, “Josh and Sienna have a unique bond. They understand each other and I wouldn’t be surprised if a relationship blossomed.”

Relationship blossomed? The only thing that's going to blossom is tiny red warts on his peen. But by the time he notices his new friends, the biggest skankwhore the world has ever seen will be on to the next dick! YAY! Sienna the great big whore is back! Hide your husbands in the basement! It's fun times again!

Posted by: Michael K


DeeDee's picture

I wonder what would happen if Sienna didn't have peen all the time? Would her chocha collapse, create a black hole, and suck all of us in?

EvilShoe's picture

Hey look, it's Suri's dad.

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Dick happens! - MK

cuntygolightly's picture

sienna, you're a major cunt! you deserve to choke on jizz and die lol

just kidding

NitWitty's picture

Good, I've got to head out for a while, glad I don't have to read about Slutty Sienna now. Will catch up on the Hartness (keepin it) later. Keep up the funnay!
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Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.

christine the hoff's picture

wow, she puts the shank in the skank.

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Fucka doodle-do.

Jill-The-Ripper's picture

What's-her-face looks even skankier wearing that unfortunate shade of lipstick.

luscious_t's picture

"The Florence Nightingale of whores!" -hahaha - That's the shit that keeps me coming back to the D about 27 times a day.

*****
"I RIDE ANYTHING I GET!"
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
~cheetos & frapp~

The C word's picture

Well at least he's single.

However the next one most likely will not be (or sans kids); Sienna's cyclical like that.
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It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious.

TheBreakdown's picture

With a nurse like that at your side, CPR is of no help.

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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.

http://www.myspace.com/triston

ISprainedMyUvula's picture

I don't care how big of a cheesedick he is, my taint still yearns for him. I know- I need an intervention.

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100% DMBAS

modianos's picture

that lipstick is unsettling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
a big cup o yum http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2B435SzgfRk