Bat Out Of Hell!
Kelly Clarkson performed at KIIS-FM's Wango Tango in Los Angeles this weekend looking like crusty Meat Loaf with extra bread crumbs. She's even got a pinch of Cojo in the face. Maybe right before her performance she walked in on Gaycrest waxing his glitter hole and she never fully recovered from that sight. I don't know. But I do know that Kelly needs to pour Adderall dust over those jeans and feed them to Paula Abdul STAT. Those jeans shouldn't have made it out of 1997 alive.
And I'm mad at Kelly right now because that "My Life Would Suck Without Fooood" song has become a regular part of my nightly dreams. That's not the first thing I want to be humming when I wake up in the morning. The first thing I want to be humming on is a.... Okay, I'll stop.
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Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:30pm
Agreed. That was good stuff.
Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:27pm.
Ooooh, the walk of shame! *blushes*
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LOL, I wouldn't know anything about that.
Nice Do-right, btw. :)
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Some people say forgive and forget. Nah, I don't know. I say forget about forgiving and just accept. And... get the hell out of town.
I still think Kelly is mad talented.
But I'm totally distracted by Karl Urban's hot factor in "Star Trek."
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P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko
I cannot believe you guys guessing size 12-14 or even 8-10. She is at least a 2X and I was speechless when I saw her so I was going to just read through your comments until I saw the defensive "she's at least an 8 0r 10" comments....if I got fat enough to grow spare tires I would still recognize Mama Cass.
They're hanging alright :(
Life is good- Just waiting for Western PA to realize it's Spring. Life good for you too?
Always nice to stop in and say hey to the Dlisted horz. You think these pics have been shopped? Parts look so out of focus in comaprison to the rest of the pic.
What the hell happened to her? I shouldn't have that Dairy Queen Blizzard for dessert! I did run five miles today!
Submitted by The C word on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:24pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:23pm.
LMAO! I remember waking up drunk. Ah..good times, good times...
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...and going to work. :S
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Ooooh, the walk of shame! *blushes*
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In Mesquite, Texas, it is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:23pm.
LMAO! I remember waking up drunk. Ah..good times, good times...
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...and going to work. :S
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Some people say forgive and forget. Nah, I don't know. I say forget about forgiving and just accept. And... get the hell out of town.
Gonnaburn! Long time no see!
How's it hangin', homey?!
:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
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Happy- I am thinking that's 12-14 ish. If not, she needs to stop cramming her size 14 thighs into size 8 jeans. She can sing, but she could dress better too.
Submitted by D.R. on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:19pm.
I remember pants like that from the days when I used to wake up drunk.
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LMAO! I remember waking up drunk. Ah..good times, good times...
♥ ThreadKilla!
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Submitted by girl_cheese on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:37pm.
I see nutrisystem and jenny craig pursuing her with a butterfly net in the near, near future.
Maybe an otter trawl.
"I found the same thing at countless PTA meetings"
truth.
I remember pants like that from the days when I used to wake up drunk.
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
Submitted by dreamhypnotique on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:59pm.
She asks me why I don't just do direct deposit and I ask her if she likes going to Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament.
hahahahaha. The kid in my high school voted most likely to succeed planned to become an astronaut. I met him again some years after HS: he had 3 kids and a boring desk job.
Submitted by paris herpes on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:58pm.
I was thinking the same thing.. I mean I don't know a lot of chicks who are size "0" most of them are a "healthy" size 8 or 10 which is probably Kelly's size.
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:55pm.
She is dykity dyke dyke dykity dyke dyke...
Oh yeah, she claims to date guys-HAHAHAHAHHAAHHA!!!
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Why does it matter?
ps dreamy - you bad. me like.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
She's selling her music, not her body. She has an actual talent, as opposed to, say, a Hilton or something like that. If she had achieved fame by parading a hot body all over the world in skimpy clothes, this would be a touch hard to take. However, my iPod doesn't give a fuck what she looks like.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
Topanga, you fucking piece of shit, shit the fuck up.
She has gotten a little chunkster.
Submitted by dreamhypnotique on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:59pm.
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I love that story.
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Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
~Kissinger
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:56pm.
P.S.-She don't look like she eats pussy, she looks like she ate pussy, about 40 pounds of pussy.
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Not a healthy choice, then?
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Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
~Kissinger
Submitted by Dr.Toast on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 7:03pm.
I have been to two Lesbian weddings, and most of the women there had the same body type as Kelly.
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I found the same thing at countless PTA meetings.
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I have been to two Lesbian weddings, and most of the women there had the same body type as Kelly.
I remember when her 1st album broke some record (sorry -- wasn't paying THAT much attention) & they made a big deal of it on AI. Even then, she looked into the camera, circled her image on the album, & said, "Air-brushed."
Sad, eh? She wasn't even big then. It's like JHud's album cover. I'd think it would be embarrassing for them as well. I wonder how their contracts read?
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"So? I'm intellectual and stuff."
"You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff."
Damn she got big!
She reminds me of this girl in my English class who used to always say things like "Let's go to the Renaissance Faire!" and "I really love Evanescence" and talked all the time about how much she wished she lived in the 1960s.
She got pregnant in eleventh grade I think and she's a bank teller now. Sometimes I see her when I deposit my paycheck. She asks me why I don't just do direct deposit and I ask her if she likes going to Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament.
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In dog years, we're all old.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
I'm not going to say that she's gained weight, that's overstating the obvious. But it's interesting because we are so used to seeing near-anorexic looking celebs that maybe seeing her look this way is completely abnormal in our brainwashed by skinniness minds. And it's not people, a LOT of women look like her and they're considered normal. My first reaction was the same as everybody else's, that she is fat, but then I became aware of my own preconceptions about my own body and the bodies of other women. Kelly may be totally happy with the way she looks...is that too hard for any of you to fathom?
I would rather count the wrinkles on my dog's balls than sit on a jury.
P.S.-She don't look like she eats pussy, she looks like she ate pussy, about 40 pounds of pussy.
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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Submitted by Trini on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:45pm.
For me it's not even the fact that she's so fucking large, it's the fact that she got so large in such a short period of time.
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It's not that short tho...it's been really gradual but they've been photoshopping the shit out of her. She's not SO large..she's just big - and we never get to see big...unless we're talking Kirstie Ally or Roseanne back then or Rosie...
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She is dykity dyke dyke dykity dyke dyke...
Oh yeah, she claims to date guys-HAHAHAHAHHAAHHA!!!
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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Didn't see her on SNL so I have no basis for camparison, but does it bother anyone else that her chin and the bottoms of her arms look fuzzy in the main pic MK hs posted? She may be large, but IMO, this looks like Photoshop fuckery overstating the obvious: Kelly C. has put on weight. Girl can wail though!
"Submitted by TOPANGA on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:46pm.
sorry for the triple chin..I mean triple post..still getting use to the new laptop :)"
It's all good, babe! No worries.
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P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko
OMG this bitch is rich, she should hire help, lipo, etc. she doesnt look good...
"Submitted by Trini on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:45pm.
For me it's not even the fact that she's so fucking large, it's the fact that she got so large in such a short period of time. Which leads me to believe that bitch has shit on her mind! I mean she's probably stressing about something and all you ladies know that sometimes stress can affect your weight and appearance. So that's probably it...aaww now I kinda feel a little bad for her. Poor Kelly."
I'm sure she had a lot of pressure making sure this record was a hit, as her last one was a total dud sales wise (I actually liked it. Some good songs, some bad.) I do wish she'd take care of herself on the road, but it seems as if she's constantly touring and not getting the proper exercise that she needs. Poor girl.
--------------------------------------
P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko
sorry for the triple chin..I mean triple post..still getting use to the new laptop :)
***"At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die." ***
A Topanga Three-Peat! :)
--------------------------------------
P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko
For me it's not even the fact that she's so fucking large, it's the fact that she got so large in such a short period of time. Which leads me to believe that bitch has shit on her mind! I mean she's probably stressing about something and all you ladies know that sometimes stress can affect your weight and appearance. So that's probably it...aaww now I kinda feel a little bad for her. Poor Kelly.
Daaaammmn, homegirl got big!!
Celebrity Fit Club stage right.
***"At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die." ***
Daaaammmn, homegirl got big!!
Celebrity Fit Club stage right.
***"At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die." ***
Daaaammmn, homegirl got big!!
Celebrity Fit Club stage right.
***"At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die." ***
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:39pm.
I would recommend those felix pole vids.
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Word! But those videos just make me cry tears of jealousy at this point! I need to set the bar low to get started. Then it's Felix all the way!
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:18pm.
Photoshop awards for her albums:
http://www.dlisted.com/node/31341
http://www.dlisted.com/node/29996
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I felt lied to when she was on American Idol. I was like "Did she drink a box of Morton's Salt before she got on stage?"
Next thing you know, she'll be doing videos Ann Wilson of Heart style: only be seen from the neck up with 80's hair towering around her.
= ^ . ^ =
Submitted by rebanndel on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 6:25pm.
WOW! I've been in desperate need of "motivation" to get back on the fitness and eating healthy wagon and by golly
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I would recommend those felix pole vids.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
I see nutrisystem and jenny craig pursuing her with a butterfly net in the near, near future. I can think of a few different ways she could've made herself look better. Maybe this will be a wakeup call for her.
I don't get...was Janis Joplin this fat?
enough with the Janis Joplin comparisons. clearly Janis wasn't that obese.
What the fuck happened to my Kel Kel? Noooooooo!!!
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P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko
Yup, she has some health problems - she is too fucking fat!
I mean , I understand Kelly has always been bringing the chub..
but .. showing up to a concert looking like laundry and housework day ?
think Janis Joplin without the songs or charisma...
"You ARE a whore,darlin"- Cristal Conners, Showgirls