Bat Out Of Hell!
Kelly Clarkson performed at KIIS-FM's Wango Tango in Los Angeles this weekend looking like crusty Meat Loaf with extra bread crumbs. She's even got a pinch of Cojo in the face. Maybe right before her performance she walked in on Gaycrest waxing his glitter hole and she never fully recovered from that sight. I don't know. But I do know that Kelly needs to pour Adderall dust over those jeans and feed them to Paula Abdul STAT. Those jeans shouldn't have made it out of 1997 alive.
And I'm mad at Kelly right now because that "My Life Would Suck Without Fooood" song has become a regular part of my nightly dreams. That's not the first thing I want to be humming when I wake up in the morning. The first thing I want to be humming on is a.... Okay, I'll stop.
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Submitted by sofster101 on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:25pm.
I had no issue with this girl until she made a comment in a magazine about how she has a big butt because she is Greek...I am 100% Greek and I have a muscular body type. Even when I gain weight, it is still muscular and toned because of what my parents passed down to me and because I workout.
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What? You're not 'given' a muscular body when you're born. You either inherit a skinny body, an average body, or a bigger body. Not muscle.
You're muscular because you WORK OUT.
As a Greek, you should know one packs a little more 'junk in the trunk'.
Anyway, in regards to Kelly Clarkson, this isn't new news. She's packed on weight before, and then she's gone back down to an average size. It just comes from being slack when she's not touring. If her physique is already a little 'rounder' in the first place if she sits on her ass for a while, that's what's going to happen.
She looks bad because she's dressed herself in shitty clothes, and her hair looks awful too. That's why she's looking shitty.
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:11pm.
I think provie would like to touch it.
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Well, I dunno - it doesn't have any hair on it;p
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give it a few years - a welcome mat awaits us all.
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Please tell me that's a joke.
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Hey, have nothing against her at all. But she has a certain "Rosie O'Donnell" (sp?...) vibe to her... Not that there is anything wrong with that!
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:13pm.
Its obvious angel i need some vitamin Provolone in her diet
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"You know, your son looks like a fag to me. You better get re-married soon, or he's gonna have a cock in his mouth faster than you can say Jack Robinson." -Paul Newman in Slapshot
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:10pm.
Submitted by ricki lake on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:38pm.
Oh boo hoo angel_i. I'm just tired of arguing circles around your dumb ass.
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Hang back angle, I got your back here....
that's dumb *black* ass to you mister!
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For reals. I'm just glad I din't have him on a leash.
That's dangerous!
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Kelly Clarkson got fat!???! OH NOOOOOOOOO!
A fat woman in America???
Shocking, appalling, horrifying!!!
Something must be done!
Kelly Clarkson must die!!!
Take her out back and shoot her! Better yet, burn her with fire!
I can see some have already lit their torches. ;)
I think provie would like to touch it.
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Well, I dunno - it doesn't have any hair on it;p
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give it a few years - a welcome mat awaits us all.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:59pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:55pm.
What Ever Major Loser.
(You can do that with your hands. Try it! Three fingers, then - you know - the "L" sign! I learned that from my daughter:)
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I tried it, and it works! Kids these days!! Hahaha, I'm going to try it on the hub in a second, once I can get him to stop watching "Cops". :-)
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Luvs it! ;p
OMG - I had to hop in the shower quick after all that tho. LOL!
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Submitted by ricki lake on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:38pm.
Oh boo hoo angel_i. I'm just tired of arguing circles around your dumb ass.
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Hang back angle, I got your back here....
that's dumb *black* ass to you mister!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:02pm.
Everyone does love my ass, tho - that must be the black half;p
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I think provie would like to touch it.
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Well, I dunno - it doesn't have any hair on it;p
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Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:33pm.
you people are fighting over Kelly Clarkson's weight.... really, now?
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we're bored and this is what mk left us with.
truly sometimes i think we're lab rats in some experiment.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
Submitted by Aunt Bea on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:01pm.
Maybe this is just a really bad photo. Ever have one of those taken? Personally, I have never! :P
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Fortunately they're servicing the Hubbell Telescope this week, just in time for her next photo-op.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
@TITS: You rock :)
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Remember, the early bird may catch the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese...
Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:22pm.
seriously this girl is a black mans wet dream. There I said it.
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Because she's employed?
LOL sorry.. I'll edit in a few...
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I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
Submitted by Aunt Bea on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 10:01pm.
Maybe this is just a really bad photo. Ever have one of those taken?
Yes!! Could be the lighting...wish there wasn't any!
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
Well, if Ozzy can look like that and be famous, why not Kelly? What? Exactly. She looks like shit. I feel sorry for her. I thought she had a prosthesis on her chin in pic 1
She's definitely got an eating disorder. It's called photoshop.
Everyone does love my ass, tho - that must be the black half;p
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I think provie would like to touch it.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.
Maybe this is just a really bad photo. Ever have one of those taken? Personally, I have never! :P
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:55pm.
What Ever Major Loser.
(You can do that with your hands. Try it! Three fingers, then - you know - the "L" sign! I learned that from my daughter:)
==============================
I tried it, and it works! Kids these days!! Hahaha, I'm going to try it on the hub in a second, once I can get him to stop watching "Cops". :-)
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In Mesquite, Texas, it is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
great, just great.... now i wanna get a bucket of chicken
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
What Ever Major Loser.
(You can do that with your hands. Try it! Three fingers, then - you know - the "L" sign! I learned that from my daughter:)
And I want to take exception to Provy - I'm not making excuses for her - dumbass made some very broad, generalized comments in the beginning which is what I was really responding to. I never said she had an eating disorder. IF she was doing unhealthy things to keep her weight down - I'm SURE she was doing that consciously at the advice of her label.
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Looks more like Fat out of Hell.
How many helpless sequins had to die to make that top?
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
I would like to point out before I leave (which I am after this comment) that I actually do like Kelly. I don't buy her albums but I like her singles that I hear, and I really don't care either way what she looks like. I'm just tired of people offering 800 completely unrealistic scenarios and excuses while completely discounting the most logical and likely reasoning. Lord knows angel_i ain't the first, especially regarding this topic. Good night all! I'm going to polish off a couple buckets of KFC, in honor of our gal Kelly here.
Flat Stanley was 3 dimensional Stanley til Kelly sat on him
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let's see if this puts everyone in a better mood
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGqb9AGLtCU
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
Submitted by Manimal5 on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:43pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:39pm.
Loves you Angel!
Kelly is a gret talent but she stand lose a "few".
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*smooch* I said that too.
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Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:39pm.
Loves you Angel!
Kelly is a great talent but she could stand lose a "few".
Now Kelly Osbourne...no talent and just fat.
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:37pm.
If she had some hippy sunglasses she could pass for Ozzy Ozbourne.
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With those hips I think she could pass Ozzy Ozbourne too.
What? Oh! Pass foooorrrr.... nevermind.
Still think there's an Olsen in there.
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Know why they don't play Rock / Paper / Scissors / Pussy? Because NOTHING beats pussy! -- Toom Viltrax
"Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:11pm.
Hey FATTY!! I got a song fer ya "A Fridge Too Far""
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That would be one of Kelly's new tearful ballads.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:42pm.
NUCKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
that homo goon O'Brein....Wheres East end girl???!
@angel i...sorry i agree with ricki lakes harsh assessment.
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Agree with whatever you want. It doesn't change the fact that none of us really knows.
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Submitted by lara on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:33pm.
It might make sense to gain a little weight, but still Britney looks way better and she's had two kids.
She looks unhealthy--period. Women can be too skinny and they can be too fat. She's in the latter camp. Just because whatever % of American women look like this does not make it okay.
She doesn't have to be a toothpick (she looked good for the first album), but she should take some pride in her professional appearance and respect her body.
the thing that amazes me about these pictures is the background... i thought she ate the drum kit
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
NUCKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
that homo goon O'Brein....Wheres East end girl???!
@angel i...sorry i agree with ricki lakes harsh assessment. you're making excuses for the fact she's just being lazy. she's lazy and eats alot. its not rocket science.
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Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:38pm.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:37pm.
If she had some hippy sunglasses she could pass for Ozzy Ozbourne.
that's what i was thinking!!! i was gonna go with tattoos though!!
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She was gonna get the tattoos, but they wanted to charge her by the square yard.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
And, um, I did respond to all of your 'points,' so whatever. You can scream "maybe she's had an eating disorder!" or whatever all you want, the fact of the matter is nobody who cared that much about how much they weighed and what they looked like would have talked non-stop to the media about how they don't care if they are bigger than other stars, like she has. They wouldn't bring it up all if they could help it. But then, I guess logic goes out the window when there are poor overweight people to defend!!! lol
PS *I* don't love her. I can't stand that fat bitch. But she can sing - I'll give her that:)
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Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:33pm.
Weigh too OT for you!
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:33pm.
you people are fighting over Kelly Clarkson's weight.... really, now?
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And TV and Mani, and Provolone and boomsy, M2C, TITS, IG et al...OMG - thank goodness for you guys. Thank you for bringing the levity (and the bitchslaps). I really appreciate it. I realize that MOSTLY, I just hate the way that bitch talks. He can say whatever he wants but he's SO abusive about it. And he doesn't even make sense..but then he struts around like a peacock...and I'm feeling so bitchy today. Really - you know if I'm responding to that shit, I'm looking for a fight. SoR-RaY!....I think I'm over it now:)
I will end with this:
Submitted by kanderso on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:19pm.
Fuck it. It's Kelly and I love her. She can get as fat as Aretha and I won't care. She's still more rich and famous and successful than any of us sluts.
:)
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Wow, what a heifer
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:37pm.
If she had some hippy sunglasses she could pass for Ozzy Ozbourne.
that's what i was thinking!!! i was gonna go with tattoos though!!
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
Oh boo hoo angel_i. I'm just tired of arguing circles around your dumb ass.
If she had some hippy sunglasses she could pass for Ozzy Ozbourne.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Who knew that Kelly Clarkson could inspire such vitriol? Yes, she has a good voice, and yes, she's gained weight. So fucking what?
I just wish she'd wash her hair and make some good music.
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In Mesquite, Texas, it is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:28pm.
She has the ass of CC Sabathia
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And a lower E.R.A., currently.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Submitted by ricki lake on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 9:32pm.
I love when people ignore the substance of an argument.
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OMG - you must becuz you do it ALL the time.
You're so fucking insecure you can't make a point that differs without including an insult. That's how people in grade school argue, ricki. Just what you have to fucking say and if you need to get your dick stroked call Jimmy. Jeez.
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is she on tour? if yes, then maybe it is the same situation as with britney. people wonder why britney put on weight since she started the tour(she looked amazing in december). i imagine touring is hard, they need to eat more, they need calories..always on the road, probably not enough sleep, not very organized...they need to eat more to keep their energy level high, can't really go to the gym....so yeah i don't know if it makes any sense...
you people are fighting over Kelly Clarkson's weight.... really, now?
OT: i said Kelly Clarkson and weight, i'm done
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
Submitted by Am on Mon, 05/11/2009 - 8:52pm.
I can't say I've seen ANY morbidly obese people older than 55. Coicidence? I think not dear. No, I'm not advocating a world full of bobbleheads. Everything in moderation, including weight.
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None? You should see the line for the Prescription Center at Wal-Mart in my town. They've got scooters backed all the way up to the greeters with fat seniors around here. Of course, I believe our obesity percentage hovers somewhere about 40% above the national average. That's purely my own estimate, based on no research or science whatsoever, but I still believe it's accurate.
Damn... there's just no safe place to rest the old eyeballs, is there.
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Know why they don't play Rock / Paper / Scissors / Pussy? Because NOTHING beats pussy! -- Toom Viltrax