Which Rock Star Did Angie Jo Do Lezzie Stuff With?
Star Magazine is trying to knock St. Angie Jo's sparkling halo off her head by claiming all sorts of scandalous shit in this week's issue. I think Jennifer Aniston might have been guest editor this week. Keep the Susan Boyle of America on payroll, because this is the shit I like to see.
Star apparently squeezed the juice out of biographer Andrew Morton and Angie's old bodyguard Mickey Brett. Both of them are planning to write tell-alls on the pristine holy family. Although, Mickey denied this a little while ago (Maddox got to him!).
Anymickeywillbestruckdownbytheendoftheweek, some of the shit Star alleges I've heard before. We've already heard zillions of stories about how St. Angie tried to destroy Jennifer Aniston. They really are the Alexis and Krystle of our time. And I think I read something about how St. Angie effed her mother's boyfriend when she was a teenager. Who hasn't done that? Yawn, moving along. But the one I really want to know about is which "female rock star" did Angie Jo hypnotize with her vagina of miracles? Mickey apparently knows all the details and is planning to unleash it to the world in his book.
My first thought was Joan Jett. And then my hand was suddenly filled with vomit. After I wiped that up, my second thought was Gwen Stefani. But I can't picture her licking on hard clit. Then it hit me. VADGE! Now, I know she's not really a "rock star," but she would make sense. St. Angie Jo only seduced Vadge to keep her from monopolizing the baby buying game.
And if you're wondering what St. Angie Jo's hypnotic vagina and Vadge's roidy-puss look like bumping into each other, just watch Godzilla vs. Hedorah.
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I think Jennifer Aniston might have been guest editor this week
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hahahahahahahahahaha
you better genuflect when you speak of The Joan Jett who has been cooler and more consistently rad then Angie or Madonna EVER have!
Joan Jett is no fair weather Bi Slut. She's full puss-i-tarian when the Paps areant around too.
Dlisted makes my nipples hard. it's true.
:)
~Zoe
http://www.myspace.com/misszoesimone
Rememeber when Angie was on the Today Show telling katie Couric how great Billy Bobs dickin' was.
T R A S H Y
She's a normal person who happens to be physically fuckinhg amazing. Ok i fucked her.
Dlisted makes my nipples hard. it's true.
:)
~Zoe
http://www.myspace.com/misszoesimone
im so bored of this womans face and life *yawn*
Forget Tom Cruise, Square Head is the real alien. Take a good look at that picture and tell me she is not an alien. No wonder Scientology is trying to recruit her ass.
Weren't Gwen & Gavin at Aniston's 40th birthday bash this year? I heard they made the guest list. How utterly f*cked up is that? I can't believe Gwen is going down on Jolie and then showing up with a birthday gift for Jen. That's just all sorts of wrong! Talk about six degrees of separation.
what do the twins look like? how old are they now? like a year old or sumpfin'?
Who cares?
actually, angie and brad already put a stop to mickey brett's book. their lawyer ripped him a new one. so that one is probably a no go. also, there's another former employee of brad's who is writing a book, as well, but with the non-disclosure contracts out there, that will probably fail, too. so andrew morton, our god of wonderfully generous sleazy tell-alls, it's all on you, baby!!! as for the rock star bit, i think it's gwen. gwen and angie have been friends for years bc angie's ex-hubby jonny lee miller is best buds with gavin tranny loving rossdale. there's my blind vice guess for the day!
Cuz everything The Star prints is true. Y'all know that!
okaaaaay
so brad and her have done some genuine good for suffering etc..
and yes she looks like a man...which was the excuse for her wanting to be even more boney for her role in what will no doubt envolve her two acting abilities (acting like a mean bitch or being a victum . just add crazy to both of those)
she was hot back in the day..she might be hot by stupid standards now, but the work done on her face has downed that shit for good...
basically, i think us 'normal people' who haven't turned to the brangaloonie side just recognise she has a fucking shitty personality
and if she wants to save the children of the world why are they all 'interesting' races? don't see any orphan white kids from the east block or lost american kids being 'saved'
ugh.
this is why j.depp totally trumps brad n co at greatness- i'm sure he does alot of private donating, keeps his family out of the picture and still does fucking brilliant movies.
ugh.
hope that book comes out just so they go undercover atleast. tired of their faces
there wouldn't be so much hate if they would give it a fucking break
"And I think I read something about how St. Angie effed her mother's boyfriend when she was a teenager. Who hasn't done that? Yawn, moving along."
MK, you fuckin' slay me!
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"Are you coming or going? Or, are you coming, and then going? Or, are you coming and staying?" --Brian Kinney
Submitted by K2 on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 4:06pm.
OK. WAIT. I'VE BIN HERE A LOOONG TIME AND THIS IS THE FRIST I'VE HEARDED ABOUT "weirdo self mutilation" - please explain.
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She has admitted on numerous occasions that she was a cutter growing up. She cut herself. Plus she likes knife play during sex and will cut herself and her partner - this shit started when she was 14. You know, when her mom allowed her boyfriend (who was about 12 yrs her senior)to live with them! She'd rather Jolie have sex in her house than out in a park. WTF?!
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Thanks.
How skeezy is that.
I like Pink. Please don't tell me Pink tainted herself by licking this Mantis' cooter.
*peeks in thread*
*wanders over to bleachers*
*crinkle, skkkrrrtt, crinkle, skrrrrrttt, chhhhtttt*
*attempts to sit with full tin foil suit on*
Submitted by kiv on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 3:09pm.
AngiJo's taste in women is butch judging by that sheemeezu chick. So i vote it was PINK, she sends butch mixed in with bisexual vibes
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Just recently Pink admitted to being bi. She said it's NO big deal. She's attracted to both -and just like Jolie they both married dick the first time down the aisle.... I'm sure there will be a gay wedding for them both the next time around (not necessarily with one another). They both like men and women and then wonder why the fuck their marriages don't work out. Although I think Pink has confessed or there were rumors swirling that Pink had a very open marriage. I'm sure that's what the relationship is betw Pitt and Jolie - at Jolie's request for sure.
OK. WAIT. I'VE BIN HERE A LOOONG TIME AND THIS IS THE FRIST I'VE HEARDED ABOUT "weirdo self mutilation" - please explain.
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She has admitted on numerous occasions that she was a cutter growing up. She cut herself. Plus she likes knife play during sex and will cut herself and her partner - this shit started when she was 14. You know, when her mom allowed her boyfriend (who was about 12 yrs her senior)to live with them! She'd rather Jolie have sex in her house than out in a park. WTF?!
Pink has said in the past that she has wanted to kiss Angelina. Link to a 2008 story:
http://www.entertainmentwise.com/news/45590/pink-id-love-to-kiss-angelin...
When I saw "female rock star" my brain started singing Pink's "So What"... "I am a ROCK STAR, I got my ROCK MOVES..."
Bla bla bla Angie...the real story here is in the upper left with Jon & Kate divorcing! Did Kate cheat first? If so, we need to get that horny mental patient back in care immediately.
I want to see Jon go on a pussy party that doesn't stop for a year.
Submitted by xerquina on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 3:09pm.
No, dear, the Brangeloonies (or 'BADETTES- they call themselves fucking BADETTES) are all squirming in Celebitchy. It's hilarious they are all indignant and outraged. The outrage! Fucking losers.
And to the rotten hole who made mention of moms here snapping their elastic waistbands (yawns, checks under fingernails...) I'll raise you one elastic waistband and see your LOOSE ELASTIC DIRTY BRA STRAP. Lick it.
I dont understand where where Angie's "halo" has come from? And I actually like her. Or why people are surprized by what she does. Her current man, married when she met him. Her last husband? Engaged when she met him? Seriously? I'm sure it goes on and on. She adopts some kids and becomes a saint? As noble and great as that is, it does not make you a saint.
AngiJo's taste in women is butch judging by that sheemeezu chick. So i vote it was PINK, she sends butch mixed in with bisexual vibes.
has there been any loon sightings yet? it's so barren up in here.
Wait, this doesn't involve Jolies mother. It involves the mothers boyfriend.
So, she fucked her brother and her mother's Bf, but nobody said anything about fucking her mother or her mothers brother. She probably fucked her brothers BF and his mother though.
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Could be almost anyone. Angie is not known for being satisfied with one person for too long.
Oh the shame I feel for snapping my waistband with glee!
*snap, snap*
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
Submitted by ZiggyStardust on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 2:41pm.
Wow, I can't believe their spinning lies that involves her dead mother.
No indeed. That's St Angies job.
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The streets of hell are paved with good intentions.
~ Twain
Wow, I can't believe their spinning lies that involves her dead mother.
That's just sick.
Some people just have no morals what so ever. Whoever put this cover together should be ashamed of themselves. And shame on the owner of this blog for giving them the publicity.
I suppose that hits are more important than integrity, huh? Well shame on you as well.
And shame on the Moms in here slapping the elastic-waists of their jeans in glee.
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@ZiggyStardust:
I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!- angel_i
Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 2:30pm.
Ahahaha!! This is the equivalent of turning on the bathroom light at JJ. *loonies scattering*
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I know, huh? And I have to leave right now! Damnit. I called in sick for Seis de Mayo. Cinco de Mayo left me with a bit of vertigo and I awoke just a little while ago to this delicious breaking noos!
See ya soon! Off to steal a copy of STAR. They must be desperate for sales....
I wouldn't be surprised if MK receives complaints from Marilyn Manson, Joan Jett, Chris Martin & The Gwyneth, Joss Stone, and KATY PERRY! (i just added Katy Perry).
*snicker*
Sort of on topic- has anyone seen the latest pics from old bradders new flick? He looks like 50 kinds of cunt and I am willing to bet a few kidneys that 'Inglorious Basterds' is going to be the 'Showgirl' of war films. It stinks like a stinky thing that's been left to fester. Ha ha ha!
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The streets of hell are paved with good intentions.
~ Twain
Ahahaha!! This is the equivalent of turning on the bathroom light at JJ. *loonies scattering*
Submitted by Provolone on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:25pm.
Please tell me she fucked the Coldplay guy. The clash between gweneth and angelina would be fantastic
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Oh that would be SO awesome! Then Brad could get in smackdown with bitchy Chris. (I lv coldplay!)
Submitted by K2 on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:22pm.
Anyone that LOVES Angelina hasn't spent enough time on the "couch"!!!
Geez (teriAnn) , pick a new freak to emulate. Not sure about the rest of you but the UN shit just isn't enough to make me turn a blind eye to her lack of morals, weirdo self mutilation behavior, brother kissing, blood obsession, dysfunctional mothering skills and husband seducing ways.... sorry.
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OK. WAIT. I'VE BIN HERE A LOOONG TIME AND THIS IS THE FRIST I'VE HEARDED ABOUT "weirdo self mutilation" - please explain.
*drools*
Ange and Joan Jett: I like it. Joan as dom. Maybe too old for Ange and I'm not sure how submissive Ange can be.
OH - AND I THINK ANJIE HYPMOTIZED JOSS STONE INTO LEZZIE TIMES.
Submitted by bitchette on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:30pm.
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I don't know, either! But it's FUNNY AS FUCK!!!!!!
Well, I’ve been working too much to comment of late- a clear breach of my human rights- but feel I have to say- ANDREW MORTON. Hell fucking yes. Us Brits will all recall ( if as old as me) when his book about Princess Diana came out. It was SCANDALOUS and people queued up for hours to say it was all rubbish bit of course every word was true. Now his Tom Cruise book was a bit of a disappointment- I like slightly more alien religion with my scandal- and you could say he is a muck raker who got lucky being used as a mouthpiece for Lady Di. But, my cold black heart beats at the thought of a Morton book on the ‘god bless the Jolie- Pitts’ and I feel – being it on. If he can survive the Royal Family and the Xenu lawyers, he’s good to go. Oh the joy, all the ghastly deets and better yet a meltdown of the loons. If they can’t even swallow an easily provable fact that ol’ Himbo didn’t adopt the ‘orphans’ then the fact the J-P's are not the rock their church was built on is going to result in Kool-Aid levels of disappointment. Ta da!
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The streets of hell are paved with good intentions.
~ Twain
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:46pm.
This former bodyguard is obviously looking to profit on Angelina's fame. She would never have a relationship with anyone other than Brad.
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Naw, the woman is a posterchild for monogomy. I mean she only fucked a guy who had a fiancee (Billy Bob Thorton) and then went on to fuck a married man (Pitt). How can ANYONE think she would cheat on Pitt?!
Seriously, Twos, can I have some of what you are smokin'?
Dear Brad:
You can't turn a ho into a housewife.
Love always,
Dr. Dre
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"DAAAAAAAAMN!!!! THIS IS SOME BENJAMIN BUTTON'S SHIT!"
I really hope Angelina Jolie ends up in coma FOREVER, because I did my research and nobody cares if someone is in coma. Go ask Israel's former Prime Minister Ariel Sharon.
What you don't know who the hell is?
Exactly!
But if she come back from the almost-grave, just blow the bitch up.
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:46pm.
This former bodyguard is obviously looking to profit on Angelina's fame. She would never have a relationship with anyone other than Brad.
I hope she seeks legal action against all the gossip magazines and bloggers spreading these groundless accusations.
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Now I had heard, earlier today, she may have had a fling with some type of fizzy soda, can you confirm or deny this?
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
YOU CANT HANDUL TEH TWOOF!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
christine the hoff on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:51pm
TEH GRAY BREAD DON'T EAT TEH GRAY BREAD!
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
yes, indeed, sue, angie sue! clear your perfect, pristine name!
"your honor, the tabloid said they saw me eating a shit sandwich, but ask anyone, I don't touch bread!"
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Fucka doodle-do.
Submitted by freebird on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:35pm.
Submitted by Sluttsville on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 1:30pm.
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Ick Nast. How do you get so effed up that effing Marilyn Manson seems like a good idea? I couldn't close my eyes enough to make that go away.
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freebird, to us, Marilyn Manson would be a nightmare, but to someone who has locked lips with James Haven....well, it's just another Saturday night.
Twosie, your mum called, you have to get off the internet now.
"I hope she seeks legal action against all the gossip magazines and bloggers spreading these groundless accusations"
Well now see Miss Twosie, that would then require Ms. Skeletina to actually have to tell the truth and open the dungeon of her life.
Lawsuits are a two way street, they have to prove the magazines, including People are wrong with TRUE FACTS!
See, she can't sue, she can't do shit because if she does, game over for her lie telling life.
You get it now? She is a cunty lying talentless hwore. And frankly you loontards can't handle the truth.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!