Wednesday, April 22nd 2009
Open Post: Hosted By Susan Boyle's New Eyebrows
Susan Boyle, the most famous person in the universe, got her shrub brows pruned. Susan let a bitch take a machete to those things. Actually, it probably took a couple of machets, a pack of wild goats and a gallon of tar to get that much hair off her eyebrows. I mean, they are a direct descendants of Robin Williams' nipple bushes.
You know, I kind of miss Susan's old eyebrows. Whenever she sang, the wind from her mouth glided up to her eyebrows causing the follicles to dance in the light. Now they look like every other hos' brows.
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Submitted by Happy Hour on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:51pm.
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:47pm.
Stoney.. I like you I really do.. but if that is what she belives, what was she supposed to answer?
Honestly, I will be more ofended if she gave an answer to make the audience or Perez happy and then find out that she voted Yes on prop 8.
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If you cant think of a way to preserve your integrity without offending people, then either your stance is wrong or you are an inelegant person of little integrity who does not deserve to win any competition youre in!
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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.
Perez is a master baiter.
♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery
pageants are outdated and non politically correct. why should the bitches answers have to be PC? its a beauty pageant. its not politically correct to judge a woman by how she looks in a bikini, but its a pageant.
well good thing we all agree that perez is a fucktard.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:56pm.
Lava, I'm just disappointed ANYONE would have that opinion. It's fucking 2009, people.
I know, Stoney. It's terrible that she feels that way. But at least she said her honest opinion. I give her points for that.
Lastly, fuck Perez. MK 4 EVA. LOL
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"I have five words for Kara: PLEASE FUCKING LEAVE YOU STUPID CUNT." MK 4/1/09
Submitted by KD on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:38pm.
You can live "on the edge" by doing less risky things, like base jumping and scuba diving with sharks. Or just playing paint ball and taking lessons for like dancing or painting or something interesting. Or volunteering at a homeless shelter. Going back to school. Moving to a foreign country on a whim.
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Sex is far better than any of those things. Sex with differnt peens is even better!
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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:53pm.
oh ok.. yes, I agree. She should not be "praised" for being a bigot, BUT not attacked either for expresing her opinions.
Lavadama on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:53pm
"And whether anyone wants to admit it or not, Miss Cali said her OPINION, and whether it's right or wrong, I thought she said it well."
"Opposite Marriage."
Nuff said.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Hahaha LCT Throw some bananas & apples in!
♪ Fruit salad, yummy yummy ♪
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Lava, I'm just disappointed ANYONE would have that opinion. It's fucking 2009, people.
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You have a fucking signature quote...come on now. Doesn't get much worse. aeon312 4/3/09
OKAY HORES I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE, HERE IS ME, THAT'S RIGHT, ME THE HOFF AND I WAS BORN IN 1961 JUST LIKE THIS BITCH CLAIMS. YOU TELL ME. AND YES, IT'S A RECENT PHOTO.
edit out. thanks topalina, I'm still too trusting, amazingly.
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Fucka Doodle Doo!
The media is building her up now, only to tear her down later. They'll be calling her a hooker soon[and not the good kind of hooka].
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Uterus filled with frozen grapes.
Carrottop,
Your mind is a beautiful wonder to me!!
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But I, being poor, have only my dreams...
Perez asking Miss Cali that question was a total attention getting move, and when I saw his face on CNN last night arguing about gay marriage, I wanted to kick him right in the balls.
Fuck Perez Hilton. He's right about gay marriage, but he is the LAST PERSON, gay or straight, that I want to hear speaking on behalf of those fighting for gay marriage. I'd rather listen to Cathy Griffin or Suze Orman than Perez.
And whether anyone wants to admit it or not, Miss Cali said her OPINION, and whether it's right or wrong, I thought she said it well.
However, it's completely obvious that she's coming from a religious standpoint, and not a human one. Every human being is allowed to live and love, and denying anyone the chance to marry who they love is inhumane, cruel and discriminatory.
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"I have five words for Kara: PLEASE FUCKING LEAVE YOU STUPID CUNT." MK 4/1/09
Sure, she should have answered what she believes, fine, but what I don't get are the PEOPLE (god it took everything in me not to call names there) defending her stupid ass!
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You have a fucking signature quote...come on now. Doesn't get much worse. aeon312 4/3/09
Everybody is mad at everybody.
Yellin' about giving pets a home.
Yellin' cuz we watch Idol.
Yellin' cuz bigots win beauty pageants.
Damn.
I don't what to yell about.
All I can drum up is my Oreo's were a little stale.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:47pm.
Stoney.. I like you I really do.. but if that is what she belives, what was she supposed to answer?
Honestly, I will be more ofended if she gave an answer to make the audience or Perez happy and then find out that she voted Yes on prop 8.
This whole Susan Boyle thing has a very "The Gods Must Be Crazy" feel to me. I hope she gets her record deal and makes a little cash before the media machine chews her up and spits her out, which should be happening in about two months, and counting.
By the way, I have this American Indian friend who I just recently got to start watching American Idol, and he calls Lil "Big Round!"
"Big Round going home tonight" he just emailed me.
LOL
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You have a fucking signature quote...come on now. Doesn't get much worse. aeon312 4/3/09
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:46pm.
LCT honey you can use it for a dartboard if'n you want...I just want it gone lol
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I'm going to stuff it full of grapes, put it in the fridge, and see how long it preserves them for.
Look Kandy, I get your Perez hate. I'm right there with you. Perez sucks. BUT what I won't tolerate and never, ever will, is hiding behind "that's just my opinion and I'm entitled to it" when your (Miss California's) opinion is discriminatory, hateful and justified only by religious doctrine, which has no place in politics or law. _____________________________________________
You have a fucking signature quote...come on now. Doesn't get much worse. aeon312 4/3/09
LCT honey you can use it for a dartboard if'n you want...I just want it gone lol
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Submitted by Falkor on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:44pm.
I dont know that i want to see 40, besides...I know HOW to be safe and as long as youre safe, its all good.
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Yes, because condom packages tell you that they protect your 100% from STDs and HIV.
You clearly don't use them.
Submitted by Master Blaster on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:36pm.
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Scotland FFS, Scotland!!
It's not England and England isn't Scotland. Jesus wept. As a sidenote, Scotland is, generally, colder, especially in the winter.
Falkor, that's just mean. There is Phish Food in the freezer but I can never just have one portion. Is ice-cream a good alternative to dinner?
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Well I like Colin. I'd let him jizz on my tattas anyday. - UKer.
I've been eating like I'm having my damn period. We had ice cream up until an hour ago, now I'm trying to decide whether it's just fucking pathetic to try and lick the drop I spilled out from between the keys on the computer.
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Okay, first of all, it's "cree-tin". If you're going to threaten me, do it properly.
Uh.. I think we are due for a group hug..WTF is going on here?
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:41pm.
I don't want a cycle anymore. I have a free uterus, practically unused if anyone wants it! Scoop it up before I stick it on eBay!
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Can I use it for scientific experiments?
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:26pm.
Submitted by Falkor on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:21pm.
Seriously, whats the point of life if you dont live on the edge every now and again?
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Uhhhhh, not getting AIDS from random guys in Vegas and living to see 40 is sort of my point of life.
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I dont know that i want to see 40, besides...I know HOW to be safe and as long as youre safe, its all good.
I still say that whoever is looking for a fun time alone should come to Vegas and just go crazy but be smart about it. You never know who youll meet and you can make a lot of "friends" that way.
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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.
HELLLURRRRR! What the baby jesus is goin on in here?
I'm ready....in sponge bob voice
A what what in the butt...what what
I missed who asked the question about taking a lone vacay but i wanted to add that i took a vacation to Europe starting in Brussels and ending in France by myself at the tender age of 18 and i had the best fucking time of my life.
I stayed in a few Hostels that could have been considered skeevy but if you're the kind of person who is aware of your sorroundings you will be fine.
You will meet so many people from all over the world that are doing the same things you really will not feel alone in the least.
"I don't go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth!"
- Kathy Griffin
I don't want a cycle anymore. I have a free uterus, practically unused if anyone wants it! Scoop it up before I stick it on eBay!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
Last night, my husband's friend got drunk at my house, and him and my husband we're up til 3am slamming doors, wrestling each other and generally being a pain in the ass. And when I tried to passive aggressively punch a wall loud enough to make them shut up, I split open my knuckle. I hope my husband doesn't call me at work today, because he's gonna GET IT.
Combine my injury with a whooping 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep, and you've got one cranky, tired ass Lavadama.
Fuck today.
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"I have five words for Kara: PLEASE FUCKING LEAVE YOU STUPID CUNT." MK 4/1/09
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:28pm.
Whatever.
*slams door*
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*opens door*
*yells*- come back, he has a cute brother who is the polar opposite..I can hook ya'll up if you want.
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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.
Submitted by KD on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:38pm.
♥♥♥
totally!
_____________________________________________
Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:30pm.
Nice to see we're all finally on the same menstrual cycle.
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Anybody want some egg drop soup!?
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST GROW THE FUCK UP!
Please.
You can live "on the edge" by doing less risky things, like base jumping and scuba diving with sharks. Or just playing paint ball and taking lessons for like dancing or painting or something interesting. Or volunteering at a homeless shelter. Going back to school. Moving to a foreign country on a whim.
The hell is wrong around har???
Why can't we all just do Happy Poses anymore?
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by anony54321 on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 1:54pm.
hey kandy, who gives a rat's ass what you think.
You're obviously drinking out of the same toilet as Mario Lavandiarrhea - go fuck yourself and your mom too why doncha? Prick. I'm entitled to say what the fuck I like without asking permission from YOUR stoopid ass. Don't fucking start with me n00b.
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 1:57pm.
My point wasn't really based on looks. She has a decent voice like I said. I just don't understand what the hoopla is all. She ain't THAT great. But god luv 'er, she had the guts to get up there and sing so good luck to her. I guess I'm not one of the 25 million raving sheep but hey that ain't such a surprise.
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:15pm.
For the educated, intelligent, non-bigots out there, the question wasn't hard to answer at all.
I expected more from you. Well, just for the sake of argument, I'm gonna say that it would take a lot longer than a fucking soundbite for most educated, intelligent, non bigots to provide a well constructed, all encompassing answer to such a loaded question because, no matter which way you go, someone's gonna be pissed off. This was just a classic case of Mario "Perez Hilton" Lavandiarrhea trying to be clever ~ that is all. And you know what else? That's MY opinion and if you don't like it, fuck off.
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:15pm.
KandyKane I think I love you.
Ahh finally an intelligent, educated, non-bigoted life form who gets that it's OK to express a personal opinion!! Yay!!! Thanks for re-establishing faith.
I'm just about her age, but I think I look way younger than her. I think it's a combo of her hair, under eye wrinkles and mouth area. She almost looks like she forgot to put her teeth back in.
Dye job and some make up, she'd be ok. Whatever.
Christine & Jill, you both look great. If I were talented enough to post a link to a photo, I would.
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She's flat and that's that!
I believe her. Who the hell lies about being 47? Trying to start a singing career after 30 is damn near impossible. Unless you possess a soul-stirring voice from the heavens. Her problem is that she's lived a sedentary life coupled with English weather and an English diet. At the end of the day, who really cares? She was and never will be a looker but that voice transcends all of that bullshit.
Hopefully, she's smart enough not to submit to any plastic surgery. If she does, game over.
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Boredom's not a burden anyone should bear.
Submitted by carefreea on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:23pm.
Good lord, why???
Open post comment : I need ice-cream and can't be arsed to buy any.
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They have a ice cream in Costa Rica called treats...sh*t is like crack its so good and addicting!
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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.
Listen to the Carrot! She speaketh the truth!
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But I, being poor, have only my dreams...
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Wed, 04/22/2009 - 2:30pm.
Nice to see we're all finally on the same menstrual cycle.
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I was just gonna say that this day is making realize I fell off the cycle...and helped explain why I was missing you bitches so badly last week;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery
I'm 46 and this is me in 2002 when I had purple hair
(edited it out)
Luckily I outgrew my purple hair phase.
That was the year I turned 40 and I was feeling rebellious.
I have zero concept of age. I think everybody is either my age or my mom's age and Susan Boyle looks closer to 65 than any forty-something I've ever seen.
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Okay, first of all, it's "cree-tin". If you're going to threaten me, do it properly.
She now looks like she could be Helena Bonham Carter's mum....she most definitely has the wardrobe!
Can I just take a second to warn everyone that posting your picture on DListed can bring about negative consequences, so just be wary.
Thanks.
I think Susan just looks old because she lived with her elderly mum and never dated.
I think most of us "cougars" hahaha like to pretty ourselves up for the menfolks.
Stoney,
That was not directed at you, you just hit post quicker than I did.
CTH!
We'll cruise the bar together and pick up hot young men!
Jill!
Purple hair!! Excellent! My boss would turn my happy ass right out the door if I tried that!
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But I, being poor, have only my dreams...