Monday, April 20th 2009

Hot Slut Of The Week: Susan Boyle

Birthday: 1961
Age: 47ish
Birth Name: Susan Boyle

Original Date of HS of the Day: April 13, 2009
Claim to Fame: Susan Boyle made thousands of black hearts beat for the first in a while when she took her teddy bear ass on Britain's Got Talent last weekend. I swear, mean ass whores who only use the words "cunt and bitch" e-mailed saying how they have fallen for a big lump of sweet honey named Susan. They are hypnotized by her voice and bewitching eyebrows!

Where is she now? Probably being given the key to the world by Jesus himself.

Why is she HS of the Week? Because if I didn't crown her Hot Slut of the Week, some bitch will cast a black spell on me and I'd wake up with overgrown pube bushes over my eyes. The horror! Plus, Susan is really kind of hard to hate on. I've tried! In case you missed it, here's her singing "My Eyebrows Will Go On" on Larry King last week:


Posted by: Michael K


Bondagebarbie's picture

I love her!I hope she does go out on a date with him too!

xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

CandyPerfumeGirl's picture

I really think this is actually pretty sad. Think about it, all the hoopla over her...is only because she is ugly but has a great voice and we are not used to this combination. It is ike you are in a zoo or a circus and see a monkey do the cha-cha. If a normal person was doing the cha-cha we wouldnt look twice but if the monkey does, then OH MY..IT HAS TO BE SPECIAL. Not that she is a monkey, but you get the point. She is mainly famous cause she is ugly first and has a good voice too, rather than because she has a good voice and the-looks-dont-matter. It's kinda sad actually, because I dont think this woman realizes how she is more a joke in most peoples' eyes than taken seriously.

Look she's been made the hot slut of the day...and HS on here are usually weird looking, wacky kinda people/things/animals...whack women dressed up funny or looking funny or grotesque to the point of hilarity...this woman is more a source of amusement...so dont all act like you are really smitten by her talent and she has restored your faith in humanity and beauty etc etc.

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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity

duoajdofdggd's picture

I found a hot place, you guys should try it ___SugarmommaMeet.Com_____a great place for rich Woman to meet young and handsome man.............

Dr. Dick's picture

Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Tue, 04/21/2009 - 1:28am.

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Amen baby! Susan is a breath of fresh air. All we have here is a bunch of lip-syncing, no-talent tramps. It was very astute of you MK to recognize that your life was in danger if you did not make this woman hot slut. She may not be the greatest singer but she has heart and guts!

She is so cute and she sings well.Love her a lot. She seems to have a nice profile on a single’s club named ..mill ionairechats.com... She’s attractive, popular there now.

jussayin's picture

hey jiggy! work sucked, like work always does, and that's why it's called work and not play. bitches stay on one's nerve....

this lady does kinda resemble Jack Black. Maybe she can be part of Tenacious D.

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Bet you're probably gonna say I look lovely,
But you probably don't think nothing of me.

rk-d's picture

Her singing is overrated and this hype is fucking stupid. Who gives a shit. That song fucking sucks too.

Teddy Rubskin's picture

Granted she has a beautiful voice and shes a bubbley happy soul, but bitch def looks like jack black trying tootsie

Mel's picture

Anyone see this Jimmy Fallon clip?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKgYsyGBYXQ

Khensu Hetep's picture

Now everyone who argues that Christina Haguilera or Beyonce are famous based upon their "talents" can shut the fuck up, because talent has nothing to do with being discovered. It took this woman 47 years, and all these hosebags have to do is take their clothes off.

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Wanna be taken seriously?
Put your fucking clothes on.

owlbear's picture

wanna dating more hot girls and guys in uniform, you can log on_www.uniformmate.com_where you can meet many hot friends including some special, talking with them online, you cant expect more, where amazing happen!!awesome_-

cheetahstripes's picture

Forty freaking seven? Hot damn. If she wins that show the first call she needs to make is to Ivana Trump's plastic surgeon. I hate to say this but that cougar looks younger than this chick.

smokeybaconflavour's picture

I didn't cry at this lady, but I was bawling my eyes out earlier today watching the Golden Girls. Now that shit is real shit when it comes to making you cry.

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"Today could be the day I'm mistaken for someone important."

smokeybaconflavour's picture

Once again I'm left out of all the fun because I don't fucking care about this ho.

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"Today could be the day I'm mistaken for someone important."

Team Valtrex's picture

Are we sure that's not Jack Black?

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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"

Hysteria's picture

looks like some big fat person sat on her head

.

paulapoo's picture

Everrahbodaahs is going on about her eyebrows. But shit, a lot of great singers have bigass frackin eyebrows. Pavarotti? Enrico Caruso? Maria Callas? Ethel Merman? Elvis even has some prominent eyebrows.

trustalways's picture

When Michael K said "teddy bear ass" that was it for me. Susan Boyle is Teddy Fucking Ruxpin. I'm probably not the first to say it.

My eyes teared when I heard her sing on Britain's Got Talent. She deserves all the attention she's getting now, though I have mixed feelings. Yes, it's great that she has made hearts grow three sizes and inspired people not to give up their lovely dreams. It's also a sad omen of the decline of Western civilization.

This was not as spectacular as the first time I heard her sing. She went flat a couple of times, and she seemed precocious here, no longer amused by her freak celebrity but beguiled by it now.

Perhaps Susan Boyle will probably have a career like Canada's Rita MacNeil rather than Celine Dion. I wish her the best, though.

ethang's picture

Damn. Some people can be so cruel. Let the woman have her moment. She wasn't blessed with good looks and appears to have an adorable personality. Save the negative comments, please.

*barf* she is so ugly.

Mickey Anonymouse's picture

I've seen Top Gear enough times to know that that's Jeremy Clarkson in a dress.

SICKITTEN's picture

Pass.

Frybread's picture

She has more talent than the famous whores like Carrie Underwear and Alien Princess Bitch. Only reason she isn't making millions is her looks.

Zappy's picture

YAY! She makes a wonderful HS!

CandyPerfumeGirl's picture

I find her version of My Heart Will Go On terrible. You can sort of hear that scottish accent or whatever it is through it. I dont know what all the hype about her is. I honestly dont think she has a great or phenomenal voice. I really think it has more to do with the fact that she is so ugly and people are surprised that somsone so ugly and ridiculous could have anything even remotely resembling beautiful and great going for her...such as her voice. I swear if someone hot like Halle Berry had a voice like that we'd all nod our heads and be like "oh ya of course...what's the big deal". Kinda sad and pathetic of us actually. I am sure she is a sweet lady and i got nothing against her, but come on folks, she isnt all that. Admit that you only think she is great cause she is fugly and you didnt expect that out of so much fugliness....

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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity

LOVING that you've had 2 Scottish HSOTW's. Amazing!

jiggywiddit's picture

Submitted by jussayin on Mon, 04/20/2009 - 8:03pm.

You always deliver! ;-)

how was work today?

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I think that Jiggy and I have spent too much time at Dlisted. --Clarisse

jussayin's picture

put her in green and she would make the cutest male leprechaun...

"I'm a little lad who like berries and creeeeeam"

***********************************************
Bet you're probably gonna say I look lovely,
But you probably don't think nothing of me.

Toonkinstein's picture

...okay I admit it...I loved her performance....I got weepy.....she seemd so humble and sweet.....

I am just tired of the Robo-Sascrotch staged "humble" smoke and mirror act..I needed something that was for real....

Go SUSAN, GO!!!!!

jiggywiddit's picture

Wow. Never knew that Ned Beatty had a twin sister. make 'em squeal like a pig, Suuuuusie!

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I think that Jiggy and I have spent too much time at Dlisted. --Clarisse

iHeartHaters's picture

IMHO she's not that bad. She has a good foundation to work with so she could be really pretty with some fixing-up. Eyebrow wax is a must, obviously. She has a beautiful smile and great teeth and that's a great start!

(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)

2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.

"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"

bourgie's picture

Since they are giving away reality shows to anyone these days, how about a Susan Boyle reality show?

It could be called Susan Boyle: From Reality to Stardom. it would follow her life as a dumpy daughter devoted to her mother till the end. It would show all her press, the competition, if she won then her making a cd, then folling her makeover (she's gonna get one doncha worry) and trying to find that one man who will give her her first kiss.

paulapoo's picture

You know it's a slow news week when everyone keeps talking about this plook.

anonymouse_9's picture

Susan is real! Her mezzo-soprano voice is pitch-perfect and strong. I'm afraid Simon Cowell will morph her with a full makeover and she'll look like every other pop singer around.

She has some disabilities and has had a shitty life and is still a virgin apparently(claims to have never been kissed). I fear she's going to be used and abused by the powers-that-be in the music industry and Hollyweird.

Fred Flintstone's picture

Sounded a fuck of a lot better than either Jessica or Asshole Simpson and she actually SANG the fucking song which is again much better than either of these two db's do.

angel_i's picture

I'm sure if someone gave this bitch a makeover she'd look pretty good. She looks really healthy to me.

♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery

Sweetas's picture

I didn't cry!! There was just something in my eye.

angel_i's picture

Dayum! I thought that was Britney for a second. But then she sang. Live. And it sounded good.

♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery

christine the hoff's picture

Snowy, you won't trust, there's aging, then there's AGING. she obviously has never, ever given a shit about anything, her hair, skin, weight, clothes, etc.

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Fucka Doodle Doo!

snowpiece's picture

oh duh it says here age right there, thanks anyway guys

I hope I don't look like her in a few more years, DAMN!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"Liberache, Versace, Coocarachi"
WATCH THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRNpPSUMqKA&feature=related

christine the hoff's picture

Snowy, she's fourty seven. hard to believe she's not in her mid-sixties and I'm not being mean.
my sis is forty five and we both look her daughters and I'm not braggin..

"going to apply more oil of olay and hit the treadmill"

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Fucka Doodle Doo!

Falkor's picture

Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/20/2009 - 4:10pm.

CTH how old is Susan??
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47. For me, its no that shes old thats shocking, but her face is absolutely stunning!!! And not in the good way! Too much testosterone!

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When incorporating food into sex, hindsight is 20/20.

ILovePapaSmurf's picture

I was making fun of a co-worker for crying over this broad last week. I go wine tasting on Saturday, came back to work and watched this video and started crying my eyes out over this biatch. She's my true hero.
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P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA

Chris Brown should get his ass kicked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo65yaAumko

Anonymous101's picture

Submitted by No Words on Mon, 04/20/2009 - 3:27pm.
I love Susan. I hope she is enjoying her moments of fame. Too many would love to take it away from her.

I would rather see Susan than most of the so-called celebrities (Britney, Paris, Kim Lardassian, Hohan, Wino...).

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Me too!!! :D

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It's creamie, not prune!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo

snowpiece's picture

CTH how old is Susan??
****************************
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"Liberache, Versace, Coocarachi"
WATCH THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRNpPSUMqKA&feature=related

christine the hoff's picture

My God, I'm forty seven. I thought she was in her early sixties, and I was being generous. what the hell, man. I'm so not trying to be mean, and God knows, I'm aging, but shit... she looks at least fifteen years older than me.
my mum looks better than that.

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Fucka Doodle Doo!

YesterdaysTrashQueen's picture

me likey her.

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"I love fast and I love hard."-MK

barelybeagle's picture

I like her, but GODDAMN I am so tired of that song! I seriously had it stuck in my head for three days straight (well, mostly just the first few lines).

madam ex's picture

Aww her 15 minutes, let her have it folks.

Happy Hour's picture

Submitted by Raniya on Mon, 04/20/2009 - 3:45pm.
Oh My GOD.. LMAO... That shit just made my day!