You Know Where This Is Going.....
At the Berlin Zoo yesterday, a crazy lady decided to take off her shoes and pay Knut a little visit! It was polite of her to take off her shoes before entering...
The 32-year-old loontardian, who was visiting the zoo with her husband and baby, broke into the polar bear enclosure during the perfect time: FEEDING TIME! Why are people stupid? Why?
When the crazy bitch finally got in, she seemed like she was filled with happiness as she swam towards one of the older polar bears. Knut was not around at the time, because he was doing a photo shoot with Playgirl or something. Now, I don't know what kind of craziness was swirling through that bitch's head while she swam towards a hongray polar bear. Maybe she thought it would be like the cartoons and they'd skip off together into the fake icy tundra. Obviously, that didn't happen.
The polar bears must have thought it was their fucking birthday! Here was a special needs seal swimming directly into their mouths! It didn't take long for them to begin biting at the bitch! When the kook realized the polar bears were gnawing at her instead of showering her with welcoming kisses, she began swimming towards safety. Some of the zoo workers tried to get the bears away from her while others hoisted the heifer up the wall with a lifesaver. The first time they tried, the lifesaver broke, but eventually they got her ass up there. The woman was taken to the nearest hospital where she was treated for bites to her arms and legs.
Nobody knows why she decided it was a good idea to try to play with the polar bears, but I think I know why. It's because she's FUCKING CRAZIER THAN FUCKING CRAZY! Let's be serious.
I think she also might be stalking Knut. Knut needs to look into taking out a restraining order against that nut!
Below is video of her rescue and also some pictures of her getting bit by a polar bear. Maybe he wasn't trying to eat her ass. Maybe he was getting kinky with her?
Wenn.com (Thanks Sabrina)
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Submitted by SuperSteph on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:50pm.
She looks like your typical fat American tourist in Berlin!
She was German, from Brandenberg.
http://www.javno.com/en-world/polar-bear-mauls-woman-in-germany_250307
Submitted by Sheeps on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:59pm.
My German is not very good, but a loose translation is, "Darwinian
If that is a reply to me it's supposed to say'Good afternoon dumb head" or something like that, lol. What a f'n dipshit-that's plain ol'english Sheepy Boy!!
Submitted by devilgirl on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 1:05pm.
Submitted by NaNoop on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:58pm.
That was hilarious you worked it in here!!!
Submitted by devilgirl on 04/07/2009
"how can these blogs and "media" make false statements about my daughter a talente"
I am cornfused?! What exactly is "talente"? Is she Rojo taliente?
I saw something like this on "When Animals Attack" some woman decided it was a great idea to hop the fence and feed the polar bears through the bars. The bear came over, grabbed the bitch and started slamming her into the bars. She was a bloody mess and as they were pulling her back the bear was licking like blood from the bars ice-grilling the woman like, "Come at me, Bitch"
Submitted by NaNoop on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:58pm.
Haha! I was worried no one would get my joke! Yay NaNoop!
I love that you added the dooo a oooo!
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
Submitted by SuperSteph on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 1:01pm.
Deutsch is actually a really fun language! Most words sound kind of agressive. For example: "Mitwoch" (pronounced Mitvock) which means Wednesday...
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What were you in Germany for?
I think ill go down to the zoo today and speak to my old buddy Tony the Tiger. He made such good sugary flakes when I was growing up. I think ill go tell him thanks!
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I like that boom boom POW.
Them chickens jockin my style.
Deutsch is actually a really fun language! Most words sound kind of agressive. For example: "Mitwoch" (pronounced Mitvock) which means Wednesday...
Germans are cool too: best beer in the world, you can drink in public, and porn is everywhere. Most places in West Deutchland are just a short drive form the Dutch border and those wonderful pot filled cafes. Oh, and they show full male and female nudity in billboards sometimes. Topless chicks are on giant ads for smokes along the B9 in Bonn. Ah, memories...
Common sense is the genius of humanity - Goethe
honestly???? fuck all, these days I'm all 4 myself. It used to b u reap what u sow , but now, nup each 4 their own!!-how times have changed! In reply 2 DG.
They should have let the PB's eat the dumb whore. This is what's called the "Darwin Factor".
I like how the bear is looking at her like "damn not fat human bitch with stupid gravy again.....can I get a steak? gotdayum!"
and this bitch has already bred....damn it.
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Bet you're probably gonna say I look lovely,
But you probably don't think nothing of me.
My German is not very good, but a loose translation is, "Darwinian!"
I'm really sorry but some people are just too fucking stupid to live. How the hell do you think it's a good idea to go swimming with a polar bear? Or any wild animal for that matter. It says she was there with her husband and baby....means she has procreated and passed on her retarded genes to the next generation. God help us all.
Submitted by devilgirl on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:51pm.
"What would you do for a human being?"
Singin' that to the Klondike Bar jingle- AWESOME!!!
What wouldja dooo-a-ooooo...
Submitted by devilgirl on 04/07/2009
"how can these blogs and "media" make false statements about my daughter a talente"
I am cornfused?! What exactly is "talente"? Is she Rojo taliente?
I know when I take my baby to the zoo, my instincts kick in and tell me to jump into the enclosures...
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Polar bears vs the hungry, hungry hippo:
She must have strudeled her fat ass right past the "Achtung-Don't feed the bears" sign.
two words - padded. cell.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHA!
This the funniest thing I have seen (after Sybil of course).
The way the polar bear appears drifts in for the kill is comedy gold.
People butcher and eat animals and are shocked when animals (who are locked in the ever so natural habitat of a ZOO) tear the shit out of anyone they can get their paws, claws, beaks and or mouths on.
Good on the polar bear! The HOT SLUT OF THE YEAR title should be instantly awarded once the bear releases a statement.
--thanks awfully--
guten arben dumb copf??? or something like that-it's been 20 odd yrs
They shoulda just left her dumb ass in there. Let nature take its course and also be a learning lesson to her kid not to follow in the fuckin' idiocy being modeled by good ol' ma.
Submitted by devilgirl on 04/07/2009
"how can these blogs and "media" make false statements about my daughter a talente"
I am cornfused?! What exactly is "talente"? Is she Rojo taliente?
No Words, blame the newscasters. They have that effect on any language. They make everything sound like twat.
That being said, what a stupid bitch. I hope everyone treats her like a fucking retard from now on. I'm so tired of the terminally stupid.
Submitted by mike on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:45pm.
I actually like German because it's easy to hear each word. You don't have the elision you do with the Romance languages.
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I think I was gauging likeability by how much hearing it stirred my....uh, soul. Yeah, That's it...how much it stirred my SOUL. (-:
"What would you do for a human being?"
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
What a lovely day out at the zoo for her kid.
i think it would.especially if she sees the photo of the boys body parts being taken out of the bears stomach
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EW. Link?
Too bad they didn't eat her, she would have been an ideal candidate for the Darwin Awards!
She looks like your typical fat American tourist in Berlin!
Common sense is the genius of humanity - Goethe
I had to call my mother over the "Special needs seal" She laughed like a hyena!
WTF is wrong with people?
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
The video was taken down, but I don't need to see it to say that people are complete morons. Leave animals alone.
LMAO at "special needs seal". Why couldn't this have ended in a fatal attack? Why do the crazies never seem to die?? Maybe this world needs them in a way we have yet to understand...it's all very perplexing...
Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:36pm.
I wonder how long she waits before suing the zoo because they didn't make it impossible for her to do such a fucking stupid thing?
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If it was here in the US, she would have already sued, thank the gods this is Germany, where they would laugh her out of court and make her pay for a frivolous suit.
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Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.
An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everybody Blind!
Save an animal in a shelter: Http://dogsindanger.com
*dead* at special needs seal!
poor scrawny ass bears too. they look hongry!
is it wrong that I would have let her ass get ate.
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Bet you're probably gonna say I look lovely,
But you probably don't think nothing of me.
Submitted by No Words on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:41pm.
Sort of on-topic...
After listening to the narration on the news report, I can honestly say that German is perhaps the most UNromantic, UNsensual, NONerotic language I have heard.
Sorry to all German-speaking Dlisters.
I actually like German because it's easy to hear each word. You don't have the elision you do with the Romance languages.
@FilthyBitch:
but then again, there are people in the world much like this woman, who are just idiots, so yeah, it probably wouldn't help.
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Isn't it Bromantic?
maybe she should have brought them some coca cola?
Sort of on-topic...
After listening to the narration on the news report, I can honestly say that German is perhaps the most UNromantic, UNsensual, NONerotic language I have heard.
Sorry to all German-speaking Dlisters.
@FilthyBitch:
really? you don't think it would scare her just a little? i think it would.especially if she sees the photo of the boys body parts being taken out of the bears stomach
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Isn't it Bromantic?
mike,
Ahahahhhahaa.... they WERE.
After this, she shoul go to church for a year, adopt a kid an open her own website
Submitted by madam s. on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:37pm.
What a tease for the bears. I think it was a sign when the first lifesaver couldn't hoist her gigantic bear-nourishing ass out of the pen that she was meant to be lunch.
They thought "Easter hams!"
Filthy Bitch,
Exactly. It's not information this woman is missing. It's several brain lobes.
30 seconds later....Tigerlilly would be licking her blood stain paws, rubbing her tummy & giving out a good burp. Trust.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
What a tease for the bears. I think it was a sign when the first lifesaver couldn't hoist her gigantic bear-nourishing ass out of the pen that she was meant to be lunch.
Submitted by gucci on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:34pm.
obviously this stupid woman doesn't know what happened in brooklyn (ny) 15yrs ago (at the prospect park zoo)to the last person who tried this: i'll give you a hint: when the bear was killed they found the remains of the boy in its belly. and with that said i wish i new this lady; i would send her the article and maybe then she would think twice about doing this shit again.
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So you are thinking this grown-assed woman did not already know that a polar bear would eat her? Sorry, but I don't think sending her the article is going to help.
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http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/montag/
I wonder how long she waits before suing the zoo because they didn't make it impossible for her to do such a fucking stupid thing?
Submitted by CeeCee on Sat, 04/11/2009 - 12:23pm.
This is why Disney fucks people up because they think when they meet a big animal it's gonna sing them a song and do a dance- delusional.
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So true. LOL____________________________________________
Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.
An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everybody Blind!
Save an animal in a shelter: Http://dogsindanger.com
WHY did they save this bitch? We don't need her in the gene pool. I'm sorry, I'm all for saving someone that falls in, but if a loon wants to CLIMB in and THEN jump in the water - I say let the bitch go!
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http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/montag/
WTF?!?! Seriously-seriously someone did this? I think we should all encourage John Mayer and Pete Wentz to try this, though? You know they'd be tempted given that attention and pictures would result.
What gets me is that this woman has a child and she thought this would be a good thing?
Didn't someone in China try to hug a Panda bear and ended up the same way?
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I'm a bilingual illiterate...I can't read in 2 languages. - Pet Shop Boys
obviously this stupid woman doesn't know what happened in brooklyn (ny) 15yrs ago (at the prospect park zoo)to the last person who tried this: i'll give you a hint: when the bear was killed they found the remains of the boy in its belly. and with that said i wish i new this lady; i would send her the article and maybe then she would think twice about doing this shit again.
DUMBASS!
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Isn't it Bromantic?
Lory (hi hunny bunny) loved your comment: lol
What a stupid cunt.