And Now JLo Is Drunk...And High

Topshop and Topman opened in NYC last night and I have to start by telling the power bottoms out there who might not know about this shit that this is NOT a place where hundreds of tops are lined up for your pleasure. I made that mistake when I was in London. I was promptly escorted out by security when I asked where the dick was. It was all very embarrassing.

At last night's opening, Kate Moss and JLo came mouth to cheek. This gross moment is making my stomach crawl up to my throat, but I hope it was good for JLo. Like I hope she got high off of Kate's fumes, because bitch needs it! Maybe if JLo got a hit of the bad shit, she would stop making "I got a doody bubble and it won't come out" face. Actually, a taste of the bad shit might make it worse. I seriously will be willing to put on an entire box of Hazmat-approved rubber gloves so that I can pop JLo's doody bubble Bobby Brown-style. Maybe then will she stop making that annoying IHasFarts face.

And if Chuck Bass chased the dragon, caught it, stumbled into a fruit dehydrator and passed out in there for a few weeks, he'd come out looking like Skeletor. Methinks Skeletor thought plaid would make him look like he's a member of the living. He thought wrong.

Getty, Wenn, Splash

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by anony54321 on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:37am.

i mean, if her pic were in the paper next to, "broadway sting: ten arrested for prostitution and narcotics possession" in my local poverty-stricken-town newspaper, she would fit RIGHT IN. why?? it makes me grossed out.

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The McCanns Did It

Submitted by Vabrownid1 on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:36am.

Kate Moss actually looks clean here and I think JLo makes those faces because she has to be photographed with Skeletor in his thrift store clothes. I wonder who picks out his clothes?

Submitted by Just Wondering on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:35am.

ISprainedMyUvula
LOVE ANDERSON
Um, lara, April Fools Day was yesterday.
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*snort*

I'll add a double snort and a knee slap to that. F.U.N.N.Y.

Just Like A White Winged Dove

Submitted by Zappy on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:35am.

@ ImpVix

He looks like Pee Wee Herman in that pic :S

Submitted by anony54321 on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:33am.

bazillions of dollars. been in the public eye since puberty. and yet kate moss is as skanky and nasty to look at - when playing herself - as any poverty-stricken-town middle school gang member. what is wrong with these people?

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The McCanns Did It

Submitted by snowpiece on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:32am.

Spoiled judging by the company I belive it's coke.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"He's our you." LaFleur
WATCH THIS:
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Submitted by Rishkin on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:31am.

Kate Moss all up in my face AGAIN!..GO AWAY!

JLO..UGH!

haha! at the dude that has to run around with the umbrella over their heads...what a tough job.

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Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:30am.

Gaa, the plaid jacket!!!

*vomits*

♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. —Groucho Marx

Submitted by Clarisse on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:29am.

Huh. I thought that was LaLohan in the main pic.

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Cooler than the other side of the pillow.

Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:28am.

Submitted by LOVE ANDERSON on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:26am.
Um, lara, April Fools Day was yesterday.
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*snort*

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Wow, he's a superhuman moron...

Submitted by devilgirl on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:27am.

Ok, he has the dead part down, but I am not sure if he can totally pass for Buddy Holly.

Submitted by LOVE ANDERSON on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:26am.

Um, lara, April Fools Day was yesterday.

"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!

Submitted by islandgirl on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:25am.

He really is a runt, isn't he? One can only imagine what he looks like naked--- on second thought...

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You know the ho was chompin on his chamois.
(Courtesy of coiled-n-hissing)

Submitted by lara on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:25am.

JLo looks stunning..so glamorous.

Submitted by shut the smurf up on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:24am.

How many Times have we gone over the fact that this fucking whore needs to stop woth the Mouth breather,"I'm too sexy for you" fucking face?
J'lo, you are not sexy ANYMORE.

He Dicho! caso cerrado!!

Submitted by yepyepyep on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:23am.

kate moss is the ugliest thing makes me feel better about myself :p
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"

Submitted by mike on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:23am.

Jlo missed it - she's never going to regain the fame she had.

Submitted by moriah on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:22am.

She has a serious case of upper sausage lip.

Submitted by LOVE ANDERSON on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:22am.

And they all look like they're in pain.

"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!

Submitted by FilthyBitch on Thu, 04/02/2009 - 9:22am.

I wonder if Jennifer is embarrassed that her husband is smaller than she is, when they take pics together. That would suck.
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